• Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views

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    Memorable Dreams

    1. The Mirror Event (validated paranormal)

      by , 05-11-1986 at 11:11 AM

      This event from the 1980s was just one more experience that all but abolished my faith in human credibility (as to why most people remain in denial regarding the paranormal, which, as I have stated, I consider more bizarre than the paranormal itself - or perhaps “paranormal” is not the right word in this case as it covers many things regarding the “unexplained” - many people seemingly completely lack the ability to either accept or relate to it - which seems overly “wrong” somehow, especially at my age now).

      In the morning of this day, I continue to have false awakenings from a few dreams and am focused on a section of the east wall of my King Street apartment when I lived in the smaller L-shaped room where the pinhead’s closet had a blocked-off doorway westerly to my room. There was a strange, shiny part of the wall whereby there were very odd shadowy figures I couldn’t quite account for. It gave the impression of both miniature demonic human-like forms and wayward fairies. The vividness of this perception was astounding. I couldn’t work out what I was looking at and later thought the dream was related to some sort of implied portal in the wall. Still, it created the impression of a reflection from somewhere else, and there was also a sort of reddish hue in some areas. The detail was quite precise and did not change in orientation. This was the only time to that point that I had such a vivid dream of focusing on the east wall and seeing the weird shiny seeming reflection from elsewhere. It almost reminded me of Hot Stuff the devil in an enchanted forest scene with a plane flying above.

      That evening, in real life, I walked to the north-side of La Crosse. I stopped at sister Marilyn’s house. She wanted me to get something for her at the store, so I walked north, then west down Gillette Street. It was the night that the garbage was set out on the boulevards. I passed near a house a few houses east from the IGA store (“Skogen’s” at the time) and noticed an object sitting freely atop the garbage can on a smaller box. Looking at it, in the dark, I saw it was a Pink Floyd “The Wall” mirror, which I had never seen one of before. I decided to take it home, as it was in seeming good condition.

      The next morning - you guessed it - the dream repeated - except it wasn’t a dream this time. I had absentmindedly placed the mirror on my desk near the south window whereby the reflection on the wall was identical to the precognitive dream of the day before. This really baffled me, even considering the thousands of similar experiences I had already had. It almost made me feel “dislocated in time”. Included here is the photo of the same mirror as what I had.

      As usual, about paranormal dreams with validated follow-ups such as this, there are several layers, with at least one layer being almost like a “cosmic jester” at work. In this case, it was related directly to the wall in my apartment as well as the movie “The Wall” (that I hadn’t even seen). In addition to visually exact precognition (which couldn’t possibly be coincidental in any way), there was the additional feeling of remote-viewing, yet somehow “displaced” in time - yet another variation of the unexplained.

      One more thing - I didn’t like the song “The Wall” at all (in fact disliked it quite a bit and often made fun of it), because they sang “We don’t need no education” - which implied that they did need education - because they were using a double negative…

      Updated 02-19-2017 at 04:18 AM by 1390

    2. The Lens

      by , 03-10-1986 at 09:10 AM
      Morning of March 10, 1986. Monday.

      There is something found in a special small cardboard box covered with fabric, like the type some wristwatches are purchased in. It seems to have been hidden in an additional compartment inside. I seem to be a different character, seemingly a young version of Ray Milland, also having his voice when I speak, this being before or during his death in reality, though I had not seen any of his movies for some time. This seems important, as although my dream does not precisely reflect the plot of any movie he was in, it does have similarities and some of the same mood throughout to the movie “X: The Man with the X-ray Eyes” from 1963.

      The box contains a special lens. It allows the person who looks through it to “see forever” and has different ways of displaying and revealing the otherwise unseen, not always consistent.

      As the other character, I become addicted to this new way of viewing the world. Over time, my eye begins to bleed. I have similar opportunities as “X” (from the Ray Milland movie) in seeing through things, as well as having the telescopic perspective. At one point, I hear a seemingly ominous line from my character that goes, “when I look through the lens of evil, I can see myself looking back” and this seems to be the case. I look through the lens, and in the supposed far distance, is a scene of me sitting on a bed and looking back at me through the same lens, like some sort of distant mirror-like reflection. This seems to be some sort of extreme point, where the lens is now functioning in a different way.

      In reality of course, because the world is a sphere, seeing everything on the planet would not be possible and would be cut off at the horizon (more so, there would be no potential for a distant mirror-like reflection). The lens seems to bend light in a way where you can see all the way around the planet and back in either perspective. (There is also a point earlier where I see myself looking through the lens, but from the back. This was an influence from a scene of the same concept from the original “Land of the Lost” television series.) I can also see into distant space, infinitely.

      Eventually, my eyes become larger and bleed more, being very bloodshot, though one eye is much worse, implying some sort of side effect, as I use it more for the lens. Over time, I grow scales on my arms and legs and eventually gills on my neck. In my dream’s last scene, I become a mooneye fish and do one last vertical leap from the water’s surface. The fish’s eye is also bleeding, seen from a distance, followed by a dramatic zooming in as if from a movie.

      Ray Milland died on this tenth of March, after my dream. Additionally, my mother developed a severe eye infection where one eye looked extremely bloodshot (and she had never had such an infection before). Because I wrote this dream out as a short story after I woke, it later seemed very strange for my mother to read it when one of the lines read “the eye looked awful”, followed by other related details. I felt embarrassingly inconsiderate (though I had written it out prior to her condition). Additionally, I had caught a mooneye fish later, which is a type of fish I rarely ever caught.

      Updated 12-17-2017 at 08:02 AM by 1390

      Tags: eyes, fish, lens
    3. Around the world...

      by , 08-17-1985 at 06:02 PM
      Night of August 17, 1985. Saturday.

      This was probably one of my most common dream themes during certain time periods as a young adult. It usually involves either erupting volcanoes or meteor showers. I would say the volcanoes are a bit more common.

      I would not call them nightmares for the most part (depending on the particular dream of course). They are more like some sort of meandering exercise in futility while under a sort of odd stress - yet sometimes turn out very nice, actually. The usual idea is, volcanoes are “approaching” (or rather more and more are growing and becoming active) and it is that way from north to south and no way to escape except by going, say west or east as fast and as far as possible, with no option to go back. Somehow, I and others manage to do this (do not ask how we get across the ocean, no logic in that, really, as this is not usually the type of dream I perform the act of running over the water in as is common in other dreams).

      There is some sort of idea that when we go all the way around the world and come back from the other side, the volcanoes will be cooled off or inactive by that point. I used to think this type of dream was fairly common with most people, but really have not read about it that much. It is almost humorous in its implication if not seemingly futile regarding some scenes.

      Strangely, there is almost always a group or two of people who believe that going towards the danger is somehow going to be better than running away, something to do with getting to where the danger has “already been” (but also usually still there or very close-by, to be honest), which is similar to the logic of going all the way around the world and coming back from the other side but perceived as far more risky even in the dream. I am not quite sure how it would be done, and do not recall dreams that revealed what happened to these people with alternate views.

      Sometimes, the world is “safe” again, but mostly barren. Other times there is an uneasy feeling that the danger is growing in both directions and we may eventually reach where it is approaching from the opposite direction and be caught in the middle (which is often only related to fires). In one dream, with meteors, the large meteorites (all bigger than basketballs) rolled along the ground for a considerable distance, which of course would not happen in reality.

      In some versions there is a weird notion of whether to run straight away or to go at some sort of angle, say forty-five degrees, due to “covering more distance”, which of course, in this case, is a ridiculous concept. Covering more distance does not equate to getting farther away in a continuous straight direction. You might as well run horizontal to the line of destruction using that logic, until it reaches you. This is similar to the idea of running in a zigzagging pattern to escape a tyrannosaurus in a few childhood dreams.

      Updated 06-19-2015 at 06:31 PM by 1390 (Enhancement)

      Tags: disaster, fire
    4. Looped Time?

      by , 09-23-1984 at 11:43 AM
      Night of September 23, 1984. Sunday.

      Of all the continuous unexplained events throughout my life, this is perhaps one of the strangest, as well as “deepest” relative to clear memory - in that there is no doubt of my experience and perspective at the time, no matter how “impossible” it seems.

      The basic nature of this event is as follows…I had fallen asleep on the couch in the living room on Loomis Street. My brother-in-law Bob was set to watch “Hardcastle and McCormick” (the first episode of the second season, “Outlaw Champion” - neither of us had seen the episode before). I was falling asleep at the time he was maneuvering to the correct channel. In my dream state, I heard the entire dialogue and sound of the show for the hour that seemingly followed, including the commercials. It did not stop there, though. The episode repeated in its entirety and was starting to get monotonous as I had already heard it (and seen parts of it seemingly through half-closed eyes). When the episode came on again for the third time, I was extremely frustrated and wondered what was going on. I was in an odd state of consciousness, with a clearer sense of false awakenings than usual. I was certain that three hours had passed and that it was near ten o'clock.

      At some points, there were distortions. One distortion was that the name of the show became “Hardcastle and Rock”. In fact, this distortion was so dominating, I actually misremembered this is the “real” name a few years later and even wrote it as such in much later journal references (without looking back on older entries - bear in mind that much of my dream journal and dream work is now on larger-capacity flash drives with fully searchable terms and references, going back to when I was born).

      During this extraordinarily boring time of “seeing” (or at least hearing) the same episode three times in a row there were unusual distortions where lucid dream states seemed to “interfere” with the continuity, but oddly, it continued correctly when “going back” rather than having a gap in what I was hearing. The main lucid dreams, which were more vivid than usual, were of being in the small yard at the front of the house and seeing the shadowy silhouette of the “mystery girl”, seemingly a teenager, standing closer to the left side of the front of the house. There is seeming mental contact and a “knowledge” that I will be with her within about ten years or so. This seems too long to wait, especially with this television show repeating over and over. She seems tentative, a bit shy to approach me, and remains about six feet away in the semidarkness of the evening (it seems much later at night in my dream than it actually is in reality, and again, it seemed that about three hours had passed in the final section of this dream scenario). Typically in dreams of this extreme lucidity, I “play with” my own shadow for a time (which I believe is the wakeful conscious mind as seen by my dream self - the opposite of what other people believe in it being the “darker” subconscious self - which to me makes no sense as again, I am already in my “subconscious form”), though this time the shadow is actually the female and I do not see her as “me” at all (though perhaps the “missing part” of me), thus I do not indulge in the shadow play. I am fully aware of her being a separate consciousness somehow and the form of “true love”.

      I eventually start to silently question why in the world my brother-in-law would watch the show three times in a row (instead of more logically thinking about the extreme unlikelihood of why they would air it three times in a row in the first place).

      When I eventually wake…the show is only just starting in reality, still showing the opening - so I hear (and this time see more of) the show for the fourth time - with more conscious focus. I had a hard time trying to work out how this had happened, especially as I had already (and correctly) seen it three times in my dream state. I was not really disoriented, just slightly annoyed at yet again experiencing something no one would believe, otherwise the very “normal” (and unproblematic) day to day nature of my lifetime since birth. I get an idea relating to other entities “tampering” with time, which may or may not directly relate to the “mystery girl”. Still, I shortly disregard it as something not that unusual (at least for me).

      As I had, to my knowledge, only experienced this more lucid “looping” effect once in my life in this particular way, it seems like a rare potential. However, in all honesty, it is not really all that different from the typical precognitive/remote viewing hybrids experienced all the time, other than that there was more clarity and focus (especially in audio), and for a seeming extended time period (far longer than usual, when, however, it could not have been more than a couple minutes even though my dream’s fully in-body sections with the “mystery girl” seemed to be about twenty minutes long, as well as including the “three hours” of the repeating show). With all the other virtually endless precognitive and remote viewing experiences, there was never the residual sense of literally “repeating time” as with this event (typical “repeating” or “reset” dreams did not share this awareness at all, for some reason).

      This also matches my wife’s experiences to some extent in seeking “the one who was meant for her” especially as the “mystery girl” was exactly like her in every way, including being the correct age for this particular dream (even the unlikely ethnicity combination and accent). She wrote to me in real life in 1991 at the same address as this dream occurred.

      There are additional strange coincidences too personal to relate here.
    5. Tornado Portal (Subtle Merkaba Prophecy)

      by , 04-09-1984 at 10:09 AM
      Morning of April 9, 1984. Monday.

      I was in bed, listening to The Alan Parsons Project’s “Tales of Mystery and Imagination: Edgar Allan Poe”. I imagined the imagery and detail. It was one of my favorite cassettes of the time, along with their “I Robot” album.

      In one vivid dream of the “mystery girl”, the petite Persian Hungarian gypsy girl from Australia (with a curious mixed accent) with the beautiful green eyes and dark curly hair, there is a storm coming; a large tornado. This, for whatever reason, does not concern me all that much.

      As the tornado gets closer, I do feel a slight wariness. The tornado is the lower half of the Merkaba in dreams, and at other levels, is the unknown future or “destiny” if you will. On another level it is the energies of the supraconscious (Universal Mind) in connecting with other levels of consciousness as perceived by the conscious mind; that is, other “realms” of mind and supraconscious exchanging energies as a new force as with a cold front meeting a warm front in causing wind and stormy weather. As I am at least partly lucid, I am not worried about being killed. Once I step into the tornado I see a beautiful young girl and recognize her as my “dream girl”. She leans back on a bed and as I approach her (in this case, I somehow see myself approaching her) there is a sense of wholeness. It is almost as if I rose above the tornado and looked down into it, where everything was clear and blue, a circular portal; an image of fulfillment.

      In a dream within a dream, I am seemingly Edgar Allan Poe in a way. My dream journals are so extensive that I have indexes within indexes, often copied to new journals with additional important observations and notes added. A raven wants to be fed stale undercooked hamburger, which it seems to like more than bologna or canned fish. I seem to receive a very important “warning” related to not allowing “ordinary” people to influence me in any way and not allow them to “interpret” not only my dreams, but even ideas I develop over time out of life experiences. I sensed an unusual idea that other people one day, around the world, would see a small part of my childhood dream work as well as other writing. Of course, this seemed like a preposterous idea. How could one just “show their dreams on television for others to watch” whenever they felt like it? Perhaps the advancements of computers could achieve this? Likely far too expensive for the average person to ever be feasible…

      One person said that the tornado was related to my “mental turmoil” (though I had less “turmoil” than others I knew) over my pretense that I would be married to a beautiful girl and have children within ten years or so. The raven was perhaps a burden, it was claimed, a “shadowy presence” representing despair, “a shadow hanging over me”. However, in my dreams, my two youngest “fictional” children learn from the raven, which speaks to them of the patterns of life and nature. I supposed other people would have been happy over me never marrying who I considered the most beautiful girl on Earth in another country. People in general have mostly only “cop outs” to share, “cop outs” which never have any value, except in learning and knowing what not to do or what not to believe from others or society as a whole.

      Years later, in real life, after I married my dream girl, “our” raven sat on my chair watching me type on my computer. My two healthy and loving children enjoyed having a raven in the house for a few weeks until I decided it was fully healed (from a non-fatal dog attack) enough to fly on its own. It still came back and said “hi” now and then…but there was one time at the computer, when I reached behind me to give it a piece of raw stale hamburger and gave it a pat that I thought of the potential for the majority of “ordinary” human beings to ever accept the truth…or in fact, have any credibility at all. I almost thought I heard the raven quote (deep in the recesses of my mind) “nevermore”.

      Updated 12-02-2015 at 07:32 AM by 1390

      memorable , lucid
    6. Computer Tunnel?

      by , 09-11-1983 at 03:11 PM
      Morning of September 11, 1983. Sunday.

      This is one of several very vivid (but non-lucid) dreams that seemed to reflect aspects of foreshadowing regarding 9-11. Dreams of this type (including one similar to this one) seemed to start in 1977, where the main patterns of a more precise nature regarding my future wife (especially regarding her “conquering” of Susan R, the “other”) were already in play, so to speak.

      My dream starts out where I am in a large wheat field. I seem to be in a fairly good mood and am feeling relaxed. However, there is a sense of impending disaster for some reason. Looking back towards the horizon (I am not sure of directional orientation - if I went by my Cubitis bedroom and in-dream focus, it would be mostly to the northeast), I see a low-flying airplane. There are two skyscrapers in the distance (but no other more discernible buildings or landmarks). The airplane is heading directly for one of the skyscrapers, the one on my right. Knowing it will probably crash (seemingly on purpose) and even though it is not that close to where I am, I start running west.

      As I run west, I seem to feel myself either shrinking or at least changing in perspective in a very bizarre way. I suddenly seem to be running through some sort of metallic tunnel which is like an awareness of running inside of a “giant computer” with various printed circuits on floor, walls, and ceiling. Behind me is an approaching energy that I know will destroy me and anyone else in the world or at least in the region. It makes a sort of sizzling sound as it gets closer and closer to me. In the distance, at the end of this “hall”, I see a forest and hope I will reach it.

      I perceive a phrase somewhat dramatically, “That’s it, that’s all, it’s everything gone!” almost like a line from poetry. I awake at this time as the sizzling gets louder behind me and I feel an intense heat. I have a sense that this giant hall has something to do with people communicating by computer on a global scale, but that the airplane has triggered the end of all the circuits or some such through an increasingly destructive explosion. This was a typical composite precognitive event. It was quite some time until I was actually “inside” computers relative to being able to easily manipulate machine language code (through a self-learning process and realizing it was all mostly “conditional jumps” and little else) until I went on to something else, as I then took on the perspective that computer technology was at least half-myth and most of what programmers claimed was false, which of course is as with pretty much everything else.

      This dream appears to have a legitimate and typical precognitive marker. Even though the airplane crashing into the skyscraper (tower) is the waking component in this case, it is also a September 11th dream and has other legitimate associations with terror such as when I cry out “That’s it, that’s all, it’s everything gone!” This causes me to ponder what is really going on in other levels of collective consciousness over any given longer time period. While it is true that the skyscraper as the tower here is my emergent consciousness and the airplane the projection of my dream self in being “stopped” during the waking transition, there is more to it, primarily literal. I run through the tunnel which is also the waking conduit (more accessible here than the tower), even more so as it looks like a circuit-board on all four sides (two walls, ceiling, and floor), the circuit-board being a model of the human brain, here upsized as my dream self seems downsized, almost shrunken.

      Updated 03-05-2016 at 11:44 AM by 1390

      non-lucid , memorable
    7. "Jennifer" (Shape-Changing Mystery Girl) - Recurring

      by , 02-09-1983 at 08:09 AM
      Morning of February 9, 1983. Wednesday.

      It is up to the individual dreamer to “decode” every precise clue that either the Universal Mind or Merkaba vehicle (experienced when awake as a blue flash in the left eye) gives them based on layering everything he or she sees into personal mythology to eventually “live the dream” so to speak, with one’s partner, together as Yin and Yang incarnate rather than just personal ascension (of which needs to come before the twin soul union). Everything in existence must be used correctly and confirmed, with no room for doubt or “interference” from the unenlightened or uniformed. In my case, I did not know it would all turn out so literal, almost like a grand comedy. (For example, even my wife’s step father’s name is “Davy Jones”, the “real” mermaid’s father. Hilarious.)

      This dream transition (the Eurythmics songs being the catalyst) started in February 9th of 1983 (what I would call the “prototype” or “birth” of this dream scenario), February 9th also being the date I came to Australia (in 1994, exactly eleven years later). Although my real “mystery girl’s” name was “known” as either Savannah or variations of Susannah when very young, the name Jennifer in this case stands for the shape-shifter or mermaid form. In fact, “Jennie Haniver” actually is a faux mermaid created from skeletal sea life remains. (One of our youngest daughter’s middle names is Revinah, which is “Haniver” in reverse; a bit of trivia for relentless clue-seekers.)

      Most versions of this dream (both in their lucid and non-lucid forms) were quite epic and would be too long to address the variations in one entry. It also seemed to be a direct continuation of my “Reptilian Girl” dream (from February 9th, 1977 - once again the same date but years apart) which even correctly rendered the scar on my wife-to-be’s wrist in real life before I met her; hers is the same distance from the bottom of the palm as mine and amusingly seems like the “continuation” of my own larger scar (near-fatal accident from age two) when our arms are held together.

      Mostly, the scenario is based on the statue at the La Crosse public library coming to life and assuming the form of my wife-to-be (whom I first made real contact with in March of 1991). This bronze statue (known as “Reflections III”, which was also the name of a novel my wife-to-be had been working on, including being the third written form) is described as follows: “This piece was donated in 1979 by Dr. Adolph Gundersen. It depicts a young woman resting on top of a carved base which was designed as an integral part of the sculpture. The figure and the base create ‘complementary negative images and contradicting planes’ in the words of the artist. The title is intentionally ambiguous, referring to reflections of the figure in the base, reflections in the pool of water before it, and the intellectual process of reflecting upon an idea.”

      My “mystery girl” and I are intimate (and most of my dream scenes take place at night, where she eventually becomes the “Reflections III” statue “again” before dawn). At times, “normal” people seem to be aware or come to learn of her existence (though there are those who deny her existence, as with Jennie in “The Bermuda Depths”, much to their later misfortune). At one point, she becomes a shark and devours people who are pursuing me. At another point, she becomes a black panther (related to my own becoming a black panther in dreams of the night of April 9, 1982 into the next morning, but of an unusual “reshaping” in which in my dream, I become a black panther and catch and eat a rabbit, though in this dream, she is a black panther and actually transforms into a rabbit as she is running, all this inspired directly from a scene from “Cat People” seen on the night of April 9, 1982, the same date I was married in 1994).

      In the last part of my dream, after she becomes a rabbit, she jumps into the water becoming a dolphin. I see her leap in the distance as the sky grows darker. (This is likely an influence from “The Incredible Mr. Limpet”, although Don Knotts becomes a fish, not a dolphin, as wrongly written in some plot descriptions by people who obviously did not really know the movie.)

      There is an ominous scene where the statue is gone. People go out to “hunt” her, but I know they will never find her. It is my intention to “go to the other side of the ocean” to find her.

      This goes all the way back to 1965 from my dream “The Thinker” and later “breakthrough” dreams (such as “Sentient Flood” from 1990) where “living statues” seem to relate to an “awakening” of something important to the dreamer’s real-life path. It may be a major archetype for others as well, though I cannot be sure since I can only “see” my own experiences.

      After these dreams, I had a strange feeling I would be meeting her in real life (even marrying her), which of course…I did, in 1994.

      Relevant influences and tie-ins:

      “The Incredible Mr. Limpet”; 1964 Don Knotts movie

      “It”; 1966 Roddy McDowall movie (secondary influence)

      “The Bermuda Depths”; 1978 television movie (main influence)

      “Portrait of Jennie”; 1948 movie

      “Jennifer”; Eurythmics song from 1983 as here, which directly followed “Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This)” (catalyst transition)

      “Ocean Girl”; David Essex song
    8. The Last Policeman

      by , 10-09-1982 at 04:09 PM
      Morning of October 9, 1982. Saturday.

      I am back in my Cubitis bedroom and I become lucid from an unknown cause (and I eventually shift into apex lucidity) but with a cautious awareness. For a time, I indulge in a lot of different scenes involving several different girls, who, for the most part, otherwise walk around enjoying themselves. I also enjoy developing various geometrical shapes in seemingly new combinations.

      At one point, I fall into focusing on various connecting planes at different angles (for example, a couch, relative to the front at ninety degrees from the seat and how the arms are structured, the three-dimensional surfaces and angles enhancing my interest in dream structures). I also deliberately gaze into the eyes of one unknown female to see if I can see something special, yet all I see are the sort of lightning-like patterns (and sometimes cilia-like forms) that make up the irises and the “oil” which makes up the pupils. Still, I see myself in the pupil, which is mirror-like, the act being similar to looking into a Christmas tree ornament.

      Over time, there are unusual physical effects. It seems as if I have been performing (sexually) for days. In the last segment (as I am thinking of what to do with my dream state and heightened clarity), I notice a dream character that seems to be lurking behind a doorway, but only his arms and hands are in view at first. I see that he is holding and pointing a pistol (though not at me at first as it almost seems that he plans on hiding a little longer). At this point, he is the only dream character other than myself.

      “Come outta there!” I yell as a command.

      “You’re under arrest!” the unfamiliar man addresses me cautiously.

      Believing that I have no use for authority in my own dream, I do a hand motion and make him point the gun to his head but he struggles (and I have to increase my own will over the scene almost as if he has his own will power), saying “No, no, wait, I have something important to tell you!” Just as I am about to eliminate him (or feel that I could), I change my mind. Instead, I pause and decide to listen, because he almost seems a part of me. I get the impression that he is the last policeman to exist in “this world”.

      I stand near the center of the living room, facing west (towards my bedroom doorway). He faces me, though a bit to my left. He lowers his gun and starts talking to me about my father (who had died on Valentine’s Day in 1979). (On one level, I seem to be aware of what he is going to say as if there is some sort of “automatic agreement”.) I realize that there had been guilt at not having performed in public with my father (or even being in the audience) at his last music venue. This seems somewhat profound, especially as the last words I ever heard him say (prior to his leaving to perform at the venue) “I sure wish you’d come with me”. Not feeling the connection to people or the interest to entertain or please them (aside from feeling out of place and uneasy in front of people at times), I did not have enough willpower to go. That was his last concert and in the middle, the very last words he said (to his audience), “looks like you’re going to have to play the jukebox from now on”.

      From here, the policeman now seems sort of scruffy. He also now appears to be only about half my height. Still, he seems more relaxed with me. As he is looking down at the floor, he says “It’s time for a new movie”, what I take to mean a release of any and all guilt related to my father and how I was not with him in his last conscious moments, as he had in his own subtle way hinted at before leaving the house.

      This lucid dream had likely gone on a bit too long (as biologically, a dreamer must eventually wake). The personified preconscious is eventually rendered (via the emergent consciousness) and “arrests” me, though there is still some unusual trailing conversation. One of the meanings of “It’s time for a new movie” could actually mean that it is time to wake to dream again at a later date, though it may also relate to not replaying the reality-based “mental movie” of guilt concerning my father.

      Updated 03-13-2017 at 09:27 AM by 1390

      lucid , memorable
    9. But Perhaps Not the Flood

      by , 10-04-1982 at 11:09 AM
      Morning of October 4, 1982. Monday.

      I am seemingly traveling on my own, heading south to an uncertain destination. There are a lot of isolated areas with a lot of shrubs, mostly. There are some back roads I follow here and there. Vaguely, I am trying to remember if I should be getting to work and what day it is.

      I discover an unusual farmhouse behind a cluster of higher shrubs. It looks abandoned. Just south of that are a few more houses, but more modern-looking. They still seem a bit unmaintained in some ways or perhaps not yet completed. A man of about forty is on a smaller tractor mower in the backyard of one larger property. I ignore him at first.

      I investigate the farmhouse, going inside through a door hanging from one hinge at an angle. There are also piles of wood blocking some other areas. There is sort of a damp smell and a desolate mood at first. Not much happens. I look around and notice that the decor is fairly unusual, but I am not sure why.

      Finally, I go into a room that has a book on a desk but the paper is unusual, somewhat felt-like, and the ink is a bit fuzzy. There is an old photograph of a beautiful girl that lived in the house (late 1940s?) before it was abandoned due to a “natural disaster”. Looking around, it is possible that the disaster was a flood, as some features seem to relate to water somehow, as perhaps reminiscent of something you would see on an old ship. There is some sort of lantern or old-fashioned kerosene lamp but it has a different design somehow.

      Looking at the book, which seems to be a diary, I discover, through images and seemingly discerning some of the writing, that the girl had a pet otter that she really cared for. I do not think that she had it in a cage. I sense a strange sadness at the idea of someone leaving their home after a seeming longer history in the region and wonder what had happened to them.

      Later, a couple other people are in their yard. One may be the man I saw on the lawn mower. He tells me that the whole area had been under water until fairly recently. He mentions that the farmhouse was there long before the new houses were built south of it.

      It dawns on me that the girl and her parents were some sort of aquatic human-like creatures (but mostly human in appearance) and that the “natural disaster” was not a flood, but the waters receding so that they had to leave their home to go to a river or lake somewhere to get away from land-dwelling humans, especially. Thus it turns out that this was one of those intriguing endings (and a very similar mood and awareness) that seemed to have intense sarcasm for “every man” along similar lines as “I’m Eager Beaver” and “The Four-Fanged Snake of Swamp Garden”, two of which I have already posted.

      Updated 07-02-2015 at 11:12 AM by 1390

    10. Tornadopillar

      by , 04-03-1982 at 10:03 AM
      Morning of April 3, 1982. Saturday.

      I am in La Crosse, Wisconsin on the south side of town and west of the main library. There are a number of other people around, mostly unknown. There is a tornado coming in our direction (from the southwest), or so it seems for several minutes. I can hear the train-like rumbling sounds (like with a real tornado but which may be caused by real environmental noise such as louder traffic while sleeping). I am with some friends and we and the other people are eventually running everywhere, though mostly north.

      All of a sudden, there is a strange screeching sound (again, possibly caused by real-life environmental sounds intruding into my dream without waking me, such as a vehicle’s brakes squealing). We look back and it turns out to have been an enormous caterpillar spinning a cocoon and was not a tornado. Everything is quiet now that the caterpillar has entered this stage and is vertically oriented within the giant cocoon, apparently sleeping and not threatening in any way. Additionally, I get the impression that it was not actually chasing us. We just happened to originally be in the area it was coincidentally moving towards during the faux chase. Eventually, I become semi-lucid and personally indulge in sensual pleasures in an offset scenario until I choose to wake.

      Resupplemented for a clearer and more detailed explanation on Saturday, 2 December 2017.

      There are really two levels to this dream, a natural (biological) ordinary meaning and a spiritual meaning if one is so inclined. On the natural level, a tornado is a factor of RAS and inner ear dynamics as precursory waking symbolism, an extreme augmentation analogous to potential dizziness in real life. In this case, that aspect is validated by a second inner ear dynamic, the potential butterfly flight symbol, which is “frozen” and thus as a result, triggering lucidity against the subdued RAS factor (similar to the “frozen” bird silhouettes in more recent apex lucidity dreams). On one level of course, this dream was at least partly influenced by “Mothra” (a 1961 movie).

      Spiritually, tornadoes represent the powerful bottom half of the Merkaba (even in my earliest childhood dreams) and, due to the “raw force” of a tornado, relate to personal dream state alchemy. (In certain trance states of deep meditation, I vividly experience the Merkaba by touching my wife Zsuzsanna on the shoulder, the Merkaba of which appears as two blue tornadoes uniting, rotating in opposite directions, with extraordinarily vivid impressions which I can only describe as seeing hundreds of different wedding ceremonies of different cultures and eras.) The transition from tornado to caterpillar-in-cocoon implies a waiting stage prior to changing into a butterfly (a type of personal ascension or implying the state of readiness for meeting my “dream girl” in real life).

      Susan R (the only person other than Zsuzsanna of whom I could ever sense as existing on other levels) and Zsuzsanna (before I knew she was a real person) drew identical vertically-oriented anthropomorphic caterpillars in a top hat (as if one had been traced over the other with even the same stray line) as a part of an otherwise dissimilar story. (One of my relatives was scared and angered by seeing this as most ordinary people do not like the unexplained, though over time, changed their way of thinking and was eventually glad I had found my “dream girl” after so many precise clues over so many years.)

      “The caterpillar makes an appearance in a few other places outside ‘Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland’, such as 'American McGee’s Alice’ and the novel 'The Looking-Glass Wars’; in both of these spin-offs he plays the role of an oracle.”

      Updated 12-02-2017 at 01:10 PM by 1390

      lucid , non-lucid , memorable , dream fragment
    11. The John Belushi Dream

      by , 03-05-1982 at 09:05 AM
      Morning of March 5, 1982. Friday.

      Dream #: 5,555-01. Reading time (optimized): 2 min. Readability score: 65.

      In my dream, I enter an unfamiliar building, seemingly in the region where I live in real life. It seems like a shopping mall in La Crosse, Wisconsin at first. Later, it seems I am attending a party in a hotel or ballroom. I feel somewhat out of place. (I am not a drinker in real life.)

      The only person I recognize is John Belushi, the American comedian. He approaches me and starts talking about his “death.” He says something like, “This is how it is when you die. You dream for a little while, then your characteristics shift, and everything you are on the outside dissipates and you move on to other places.” These are not the exact words, but close.

      As he talks, my dream becomes more vivid but remains uneventful. John is wearing a dark suit that changes slightly at times, from a shimmery material to a bit duller and back. He also seems to be drinking a pinkish drink from a small cocktail glass.

      I become aware that most of the people at the party are either “dying” or are other living people having the “same” dream. A couple of times, John walks away to talk to someone else, but they mostly ignore him, so he ends up walking back to me and talking more. I start to think that maybe it is not actually me he is talking to, but someone who is somehow standing where I am and whom he sees as someone else, perhaps an actual friend of his - or maybe I am a “layer” in someone else, perhaps a layer of a typical dream persona composite.

      After leaving the building, when I am later walking down the street about a block away, I look back and notice a big white bat above the building, flying in a circle. The building now looks like a foreign mausoleum, though also somewhat like a miniature cathedral. The motions of the bat remind me slightly of stop-motion animation in old movies such as “Jason and the Argonauts” (a recurring dream distortion since childhood). I vaguely perceive that the white bat only represents death in this dream because I had read about it in a so-called dream dictionary, and otherwise do not believe in “dream interpretation.”

      I revised this entry on Tuesday, 16 October 2018, using my new readability software. Many people would call this dream precognitive, but the evidence seems to indicate it was telepathic, as John Belushi’s death occurred about the same time as my dream. I was not a fan and had not seen all his movies. Does this mean that John Belushi was intentionally “sending” to me? I doubt it. He would not have known me or where I lived or anything about me. Threads of the interconsciousness made their way to me, but as to how and why, this is ultimately unanswered at this time. When modern humanity develops some semblance of intelligence instead of perpetual denial, perhaps such mysteries will be explained, even measured.

      Updated 10-16-2018 at 04:58 PM by 1390

    12. Raven’s Shadow

      by , 11-29-1981 at 05:29 PM
      Morning of November 29, 1981. Sunday.

      I am back in the living room in Cubitis, more in the southwestern area of the larger room. It seems to be “isolated” somehow and I am perhaps the only one in the entire region. There is a very vivid awareness of the type which I would label as a type of “faux lucidity”, as, even though I am fully, consciously aware and it is so vivid, I am not certain of the nature of the “level” of my dream (regarding the particular “eerie” band of consciousness), and so see it as a potential aspect of really being fully awake at the time - it is an unusual state of knowing you are dreaming, yet still thinking you are somewhat conscious in an actual place with eyes open - a bit hard to explain, I think.

      In one area to the south, near the left; the narrower section of wall at the end of the hallway (that was to the right of the kitchenette entrance though the layout is distorted), I see a large shadow slowly and very smoothly sweep across that area on the wall. It is shaped like a bird, seemingly a raven. There is an unusual sense of timelessness. This exact same theme (and very similar imagery) repeated later on (a few months later), but seemed to occur at an open construction site late at night in Wisconsin rather than my old Florida home as here.

      Over time, this seemed to create the phrase within my mind - “time is raven-winged”, (a possible play on “time flies” though also in the context of time being a “scavenger”).

      This may sound negative, but we (my wife Zsuzsanna and our two oldest children at the time) had a positive enriching experience with helping an injured raven in real life years later.

      The bird shadow symbol (usually rendered as being in flight), sometimes “sweeping” though sometimes falling, which primarily represents the waking point itself, has been common in a number of my waking transitions since early childhood. “Frozen” and motionless bird shadows with no source projected onto a stage used as a living space by a female tulpa was an extremely vivid scene in a dream of recent apex lucidity of the type of augmented awareness that almost surpasses real life perception. When your mind is able to freeze the birds in flight rendering to where only the hovering shadows are projected, that is near-ultimate dream control.

      Tags: raven, shadow
      lucid , memorable
    13. "Arcadia’s Run by Zombies"

      by , 10-27-1981 at 04:27 PM
      Morning of October 27, 1981. Tuesday.

      I find myself wandering through an area near a fictitious outdoor café in Arcadia, Florida, on West Oak Street, near the Tree of Knowledge. The sidewalk is over twice the width it is in reality. It seems to be late afternoon even though an unlikely mist seems to rise from the ground at one point (but does not rise above my waist). (Mist such as this is a dream state indicator, a factor of the dream state itself.)

      I begin to cheerfully interact with schoolmates and four of us sit down at a small round table sheltered under an umbrella. Eventually, our waiter approaches. He turns out to be Roosevelt (a former classmate and friend), but he is walking slowly from the south with his arms horizontally up in front of him as if mocking the sleepwalker stereotype (as seen on “The Honeymooners” for example), with his eyes rolled up so that only the whites of his eyes are visible. He is now apparently a zombie (the original meaning, not the popular modern misuse of the word). There is no threat, only seeming pretense. The situation seems rather comedic and I sense we are all being filmed, though I feel that Roosevelt is more aware of the supposed script. (Roosevelt is this dream’s personified preconscious. He is acting like a “zombie” or sleepwalker to make my dream self aware that I am dreaming, although this often does not work as my non-lucid subconscious self does not have viable synaptic gating to perceive my conscious self identity as in waking life. This factor has been rendered in the majority of my non-lucid dreams, which is unrelated to the myth of “interpretation”.)

      Time passes, and more and more people apparently become zombies, who mostly roll their eyes up and mainly just walk around slowly with their arms stretched out in front of them like sleepwalkers, not any sort of threat at any point. I notice that the whole town of Arcadia has taken on the look of Dodge City as it appears in the “Gunsmoke” television series, though more like an isolated ghost town (which has occurred as a setting in other dreams).

      In my dream’s final segment, I vividly hear nails being pulled from wood and thin boards being pulled apart with crowbars and I see that all the large old wooden buildings were only facades over the “real” commercial buildings, the facades now all being taken down, as the movie’s filming has apparently ended. All the “zombies” are seen to be actors in a new comedic movie featuring Arcadia as a tourist attraction inhabited by bumbling zombies. Behind another series of wooden facades (which are also being taken down), I see Lake Katherine (which is incorrectly rendered as being just north of Oak Street and the Tree of Knowledge). A single motor skiff moves through the water, being steered by an unknown cheerful male of perhaps thirty, who turns his boat to go right of my viewpoint (waking factor orientation). I feel a strong and clear sense of joy and happiness and the clear awareness of the sun rising and birds singing as my dream self focuses on the wakes left by the boat, and I think “wakes” as I am waking (which has happened in a number of other dreams, which of course is very amusing waking process autosymbolism in a dream that reflects the dream state itself in every way imaginable, including the facades being taken down; autosymbolism for the start of the final waking process and the breaking dawn waking autosymbolism; the end of the illusory dream state).

      Updated 05-29-2018 at 07:22 PM by 1390

      non-lucid , memorable
    14. The UFO is a Giant Firefly

      by , 06-23-1981 at 12:23 PM
      Morning of June 23, 1981. Tuesday.

      Dream #: 5,300-02. Reading time: 50 sec.

      I am in the Chipmunk Coulee region in Wisconsin, where I have not lived since I was about five years of age. I am in a clearing just outside a wooded area on a hill. It seems isolated, peaceful, and beautiful. I am unaware of anyone else.

      Eventually, it is nighttime. I see a big bright greenish-yellow light that I cannot identify. At first, I think it may be a spacecraft. As it comes closer, I see it is a giant firefly, about the size of a small airplane. It does not seem to be a threat, though there is a sense of puzzlement and wonder.

      [projected transitional vestibular system correlation]

      This event type, though always different in each sleep cycle, is a result of projected anticipation of the waking process itself and stems from the correlation of the imaginary physicality of the dream state with my legitimate physicality and orientation.

      Yellow (especially as light) is a factor of emerging consciousness associated with sunrise, often only discernible in the final stage of a dream.

      I anticipate the dream state as being unlike waking life. The result of my thought creates a UFO, but it resolves as the increasing mental energy of my emerging consciousness. The result is a positive and wondrous association.

      Updated 07-27-2019 at 04:52 AM by 1390

    15. Seeds of Life

      by , 11-09-1980 at 09:49 AM
      Morning of November 9, 1980. Sunday.

      This was a very long movie-like dream where I still played the main role. As such, I did not seem to be threatened at any point even though the basis is the end of modern civilization (which actually seems like a very positive thing in my dream in my own experiences), yet also a dawn of a seemingly better way of life. Several years after my dream, I enjoyed a song that came out with the same title as my original dream records, also called “Seeds of Life” - by Jan Hammer and by Chris Thompson, one of my favorite vocalists after Tony Carey.

      I somehow gain access to a way to have special seeds that grow quickly - almost like a “Jack in the Beanstalk” type connection (which seem to come to me by way of some sort of “divine intervention” so to speak), but more related to a type of world change. Sometime after this I grew fond of a song with the lyrics “here, here are the seeds”, which had a strong influence on my ideas at one point. I believe it was from an album called “Wind Woman”, but I can find no information on the Internet about it. In fact, there are a few albums that I really enjoyed and listened to a lot that I can find little or no information about, which is typical, really.

      Anyhow, wherever I throw a handful of seeds, large vines grow up and around buildings, and the city grows more and more jungle-like. After a time, many people start to focus on the negative implications rather than the concept of having so much food and additional shelter.

      I am in my old high school environment (in a small trailer, which was called a “portable” classroom) and eventually, dinosaurs somehow come about and walk through the new jungles. There are times when I clearly see the vines growing fairly quickly and am even “saved” by such an event when rapidly growing trees push aside people that are after me.

      At one point, I am arrested for all the trouble the seeds have caused (as I am the one who had put them everywhere). However, as I am in the police car, I “hear” a voice say “finish your job”, which is actually more like “feeling the shape of the words” rather than hearing the audio, similar to telepathy. I throw the seeds I have left, which are almost egg-like in shape and size. From there, the car is stopped by crashing into a tree that grows through the middle of the road. I escape from there. Eventually I am able to live high in the jungle branches and enjoy the view.
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