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    Memorable Dreams

    1. Trigger to Full Lucidity - The Guinea Pig Tells Me So

      by , 02-09-2015 at 01:26 PM
      Morning of February 9, 2015. Monday.



      For quite some time I am looking at old family photographs on my computer. There is one part where there are also videos below the photographs, several full-screen ones, but columned down the screen, all playing at the same time, which is a bit annoying. Still, I manage to learn of an unknown (fictional) teenage girl having been a friend of the family for a long time. Meanwhile, I realize it is a bit cold and the front door to the apartment is open (though we live in a one-family house in reality). The heating is working but I think of telling my wife about the open front door instead of just closing it. (It is the opposite in reality - too hot and with a fan on next to the bed.)

      The unknown girl’s name is Stella Womack. This is likely a typical dream distortion, in this case, of “still a woman” (the name being completely unfamiliar to me otherwise though there are people with the name in reality).

      Some sort of intense in-dream mystery seems to build. This girl had photographs taken numerous times with members of my family and at a few different addresses we had lived. Somehow, something is not explainable, yet I do not become lucid over this nonexistent person having been photographed and filmed for so long. Perhaps my memory has failed and I had somehow forgotten about her. I decide to talk to my wife and find out more about all the photographs. Perhaps I had somehow just not seen any of these photographs and thus was unaware of her all this time. In the last image I see, she is standing in the kitchen holding a guinea pig and there is also a small dog on the table. Oddly, she has her mouth over the head of the guinea pig, but not so it would be unable to breathe.

      My wife is lying in bed and I walk in and talk to her about this Womack girl. I remember another photograph of her standing in a kitchen. I clearly see all the hanging utensils and other details. My wife seems uncertain about why I seem confused over the photographs. She suddenly shouts “you’re dreaming!” From here she either becomes, or is replaced by, a human-sized guinea pig with its jaw hanging open and with wide overly large glassy eyes (with the impression that it was the guinea pig that had yelled and “died” or became completely still). This image remains completely “frozen”. Even though it feels as if I am wide awake now, as “real” as reality, I also have a strange awareness which is almost like coming out of a fog. (This is at least a partial result of the “thank you for telling me when I am dreaming” meditation - but to where it is now a part of my normal thinking - yes, all it takes is simple thinking, as with anything else, which transforms into actual belief and automatic responses over time - though certain mental patterns and “abilities” seem to take over twenty years to hone perfectly with light three-minute affirmation sessions throughout every day, many thousands of which I developed over time since childhood.)

      Becoming fully lucid, I wander off into a typical random “let’s have sex” neighborhood - fully aware that I am always the maker of all my dreams (both lucid and non-lucid - something I have accepted since I was very young) - and easily rip the front doors off the first house I come to and throw them into the front yard behind me. Three perfect copies of my beautiful wife are lounging around in the living room. There are at least two other people around, somewhere in the house, but I ignore their presence at first. Obviously, full passive cooperation follows as I sit down on the couch and have one at a time over what seems about an hour. Only one copy is wearing reading glasses, the pair she has used only rarely in reality. Another copy is several years younger.

      At one point, another male walks out from the hallway and is standing behind the couch, almost like some sort of brainless Sims character meandering about - as I sense no intelligence or consciousness as I do with my wives. I do not really feel threatened or judged but I am somewhat annoyed by some sort of incoherent muffled vocalization on his part (he seemingly represents the typical imposing nature of everyman) - so I somehow fling my arms backwards, grab him by the shoulders, fold him into a paper airplane, and fling him back into the hallway.

      For seemingly about twenty minutes, I relax in my dream between sexual acts, cheerfully admiring my dream’s environment, sitting there and contemplating how amazing it is that I feel exactly the same as I do when awake (though this dream is far more vivid and with more conscious “depth” than typical lucid dream types - as I am in complete “automatic” control and focus throughout). I look around the room. There is a small bedroom on my left side. The hallway on the other side of the room is in front of me. The couch (near the center of the room) faces away from the front door. At no time does the room change size or change in any other way (as is typical in non-lucid dreams and even some lucid ones).

      I look up and behind me and see at least four large silver wind chimes hanging from the ceiling; the same direction as the couch is oriented but arranged over the length of the room, north to south. They are crescent moons and five-pointed stars. The ceiling reflects the very slight motions of the wind chimes perfectly, both in the cast shadows and the silvery reflections of each star and crescent moon, which captures my attention for a few minutes, it is so amazingly beautiful and bringing a deep sense of peace. I briefly focus on how it is possible for the movements to be so accurate. In fact, I deliberately study the reflections on the ceiling caused by a particular wind chime and watch the very slight movement which is rendered exactly on the ceiling in shadow and light simultaneously - just as it would be in reality. This pleases me and I amazed by the correct details. I could sit here admiring the designs for hours.

      I indulge in lovemaking three times before the telephone wakes me up in the middle of my third climax. It is a sudden shift from what seemed like an alternate reality - but the speed at which my in-dream awareness drops and “breaks” and then rises again as I wake gives me a slight headache. The first lovemaking is “normal” but the second (in reading glasses at first) involves a delay as she is wearing at least two layers of very sheer white cloth over nearly her entire body. It takes a bit of time to “scrape” the pieces off into various small shreds and the visual detail, both bodily and concerning the cloth, is extraordinary - I do get most of the first layer off - still, I lose patience and climax on the outside, still seeing her darker pinkness through the transparent but grid-patterned cloth. The third act involves the youngest version coming back from the bedroom (though she had been in the living room earlier) and this one gives oral - the beginning being almost like a “vacuuming” effect on me and with the enhanced “tickle” and eventual beginning climax - but then the telephone rings in reality.

      In my wife’s dream, she was looking at lady’s pajama pants with stars and moons, wondering if she wanted to wear them - not shared dreaming but still a linking element.
      Tags: sex
      Categories
      lucid , memorable
    2. Underwater Treasure Hunt

      by , 02-06-2015 at 01:24 PM
      Morning of February 6, 2015. Friday.



      I am swimming underwater in the ocean, in an area between Antarctica and Australia. However, the map I view at a few different later occasions in-dream is incorrect. Relative to Antarctica, it has Australia in the same general location as where the bottom of South America would be in reality (rather than the other side). This incorrect concept and related vivid imagery does not trigger any thoughts of error at all. The map’s location is not defined; it is more like a dream within a dream that I mentally visit for some reason, though looking somewhat like a computer monitor. I am looking for millions of dollars in old coins at the bottom of the ocean. It actually seems like I am only about twelve or so feet underwater at the most. Most of the ocean bottom is white sand and light-colored rock.

      There are pirates rather loosely involved in the plot, but there is no conflict and the group only appears a bit later. However, there is one male who is tied to a weight or underwater object in a way where his head is just able to remain above the water. This seems like some sort of punishment (I am not sure if they are intending to come back for him). I try to help him while I maneuver in a small boat but am unable to.

      It is quite enjoyable exploring the underwater realm. I am still able to breathe somehow, without any gear. I find everything from fairly modern pennies to Spanish Doubloons, which I hold in my hands at times, some of the coin types being in clusters on their own in certain areas. I am “collecting” the coins and occasionally other items, which also apparently end up in an undefined additional realm, like some sort of abstract “pocket” location somewhere. (I do not see them again after I “collect” them - I am apparently teleporting them to a safe location where I live.)

      At one point, another male swims with me. I think he is the captain of a ship but I am not sure of his identity or whether or not he is actually a pirate. He may actually be connected to the British Navy. At any rate, he seems to have only mild interest in the treasures on the ocean bottom though I do have a vague sense that others may be exploring the area and taking coins and such in a day or so. I want to find as many as possible before others arrive.

      There is one smaller cluster of about five silver coins that are actually fake Spanish Doubloons. Several real Lincoln pennies are also closely scattered in the same area with various levels of brighter shininess down to dull coppery matte. The other male does not seem impressed by the cheap replica coins and I feel slightly embarrassed when I pick them up to show him. He seems to want to focus on these rather than nearby very valuable coins.

      Other than various types of coins, there are also old pocket watches here and there (association with time being valuable, making sense of time, or time in investigating dreams being valuable - being underwater represents exploring the deeper levels of the self).

      I am not sure if the submerged man is going to be freed (he possibly represents everyman or how I see everyman), but I greatly enjoy exploring the ocean floor. Oddly however, I do not notice any fish or aquatic plants at any point.
      Tags: coins, ocean, treasure
      Categories
      memorable
    3. Enhanced Kissing and more

      by , 01-22-2015 at 07:22 AM
      Morning of January 22, 2015. Thursday.



      Of all the “experiments” I have done in my life to influence, enhance, or alter dream states, I have ultimately decided that simple thinking is the key. I have tried a particular focused form of thought enough to know it is the most powerful technique, especially when preceded by “thank you for…” (without even needing belief in a deity). Just listening to something does not seem to do much unless it is with my own special technique and even that has certain limitations in certain states. Needing to hear something seems to limit certain states (plus, I have experienced a vivid lucid state where external sound and its influence is non-existent), likely because a part of the mind is still “grounded” in a particular way. (Once again, I should mention the lucid dreaming fiasco of years ago where I entered the most vivid dream state possible with a shorter audio loop, though once in my dream, solely tried to find the source of the sound to turn it off - the very meaning of “irony”). So what do I do that works? Three-minute very subtle mental affirmation meditations (not spoken aloud, just actively thought) throughout the day and night (sometimes in closer clusters), watching the clock and using an addend of four but only ever counting them as three minutes in my personal journal. In this case, it added up to sixty minutes overall.

      In my dream (and the ones which followed) I find myself in a full-body awareness that is no different from being awake other than the senses being enhanced and the depth perception intensified. This used to puzzle me - but I attribute it to being “closer” to one’s internal awareness in sleep. I have never had the slightest concern (as some people claim as possibility) about differentiating from the real world and a dream when awake - and in a vivid lucid dream, that concern is pointless anyway, so yet again, typical mainstream dream literature fails to impress me or even make any sense.

      I find myself in a dream environment in a larger room that I cannot identify, though it is similar in familiarity to (but much larger than) the larger southernmost room in the Loomis Street house. I am sitting comfortably on an armchair facing east. As with another recent dream, the increased sensuality, almost to a point where I would otherwise think it impossible, seems the most “automatic” and natural of all dream states, almost as if all nuances of my dream are “instantly surrendering” to a core subliminal whim. In fact, all I do is lift my arms up a bit and my beautiful wife materializes in front of me (only her head at first) and she bends down to indulge in passionate kissing with me for quite some time. The sense of touch is probably double that of reality and I am also amazed by the solid nature of her form.

      This is followed by making love on the floor, from the side and from behind, but holding ourselves up with our left arms, in some sort of otherwise physically impossible situation (well, at least for me). During the climax, I notice (as I have in several other dreams) that my wife has sparse reptilian scales around her hips and bordering the small of her back, which does not bother me. However, I soon take this into a forced scenario out of habit, relating to what I feel happens often in non-lucid dreams; that is, the dreamer forcing certain possible conflicts possibly regarding a need for increased “pulsing” energy as such for whatever reason (again, for example, maintaining the knowledge but vague memory that I was solely the one that instigated my own chase dreams even with dinosaurs following me, just to experience the event, although most people do not seem to remember the event horizon of when they planned this themselves, so thus you have people that believe in demons or similar entities - the case seemingly being that a particular section of memory was lost).

      My dream is not “fooled” though and I am too vividly integrated with my dream’s environment to be absentmindedly a “victim”. When I try to force a negative association for a dramatic movie-like scene, I illogically in the past tense speak to my wife, saying, “You had scales!” but she just cheerfully lightly laughs and shakes her head and levitates a bit from the floor, “rolling about” in midair and lowering herself again. I ask her “Why did you have scales?” and then I feel idiotic since it was me that gave her the scales in the first place. I try to get her to appear more aggressive, but that fails and she becomes about ten years younger and we make love again, “rolling around” in midair, at times like mists with various tendrils but I also become aware of where I am in reality.

      An odd false awakening occurs. I am in the computer room in Wavell Heights though the setup and room layout is different. My dream is almost as vivid as my previous but I am no longer lucid. There is a closed window near where the printer is. The printer seems more like an oversized typewriter. There are also what seem to be kitchen features in the room, including a faucet over the top of the printer (seemingly on the window sill as was strangely the case in our Clayfield apartment’s kitchen). I absentmindedly turn the faucet on (it is more to the right), realize that the printer is then filling up with water (almost in the manner of a sink) and then turn it off. The physical sensations of doing this are greatly enhanced and I briefly contemplate that real life is not this “close” in the sense of touch but do not become lucid again. Once again I catch myself having turned the faucet on in the semi-dark room. I again turn it off just as the water starts spilling over the top of the printer a bit. It then sits there still full, like a full sink, and I am contemplating when it could be used again. I then finally notice that the printer is plugged in, so I remove the cord from the printer itself, which is higher up on the front instead of the back area (this is likely because the back of my desk in reality is open to the path into the room as if it was the “front”). I then go to tell my wife about the event, planning on asking her to help with getting the water out of the printer by using cups, though this does not seem feasible. I do not think turning it upside-down would be a good idea, though.

      There is another false awakening, this one more intense, but ending up as some sort of parody of people who preach about the end of the world. Having heard about the supposed approaching “end of the world” in virtually endless scenarios since I was very young, any emotional impact or credibility has dissolved. I am watching a set of four smaller televisions in a column in an extended part of a doorway. Each television has the same show but with slightly different timing (this is based on a real-life event of years ago, where I was changing channels and noticed the same religious show on two different channels but one about a minute ahead of the other and I played around, sometimes getting unintentionally funny phrases with each switch over).

      There is a chubby preacher ranting before a live audience, loudly asking “What if the world ends tomorrow?” and he keeps repeating this for a short time with a terrified look on his face. I notice red flashing lights and other people crying out including a few from the choir on the stage. It almost seems possible that the world could end tomorrow but I do not feel afraid. However, he then shouts “What if the world ends the day after tomorrow?” with an even more terrified visage. This does not seem to make much sense as that would be one day later and less to worry about for a short time. However, he keeps going on like this, with his emotional anticipation illogically inverted, going into more and more preposterous and loud unrestrained queries such as “What if the world ends the day after the day after the day after three weeks from tomorrow?” seeming more and more alarmed each time, the longer the potential “doomsday” is from then - completely senseless. The audience keeps gasping and crying out to everything he says. I stand there in disbelief until my dream fades with a strong and clear attitude that it does not even matter if and when the world ends - why keep theorizing as such? This last false awakening seems vaguely influenced by the last scenes from “The Blob” (1988 version) - seen the evening before - where the traumatized preacher is shown as having the power to “end the world” from a piece of the life-form he has in a container.
    4. Another New Variation of Cubitis

      by , 01-18-2015 at 07:18 AM
      Morning of January 18, 2015. Sunday.



      Of the thousands of variations that have been rendered in my dreams of my Cubitis home since 1968, along comes a completely different one after over thirty years of last having been there. This one is a little more diverse than usual. I do not believe this is due to long-term memory distortion either, because there were alterations of the house in my dreams when I was living there (and indeed, as there have been with all places I have lived). This is also another “extra window” dream as with a recent dream about my present home. My dream is very vivid (fully in-body), though I am not lucid at any point.

      My dream seemingly takes place late at night. My wife Zsuzsanna is with me (though she has never been to America). My computer setup in real life is somewhat similar to how it is set up in my bedroom in my dream, with the monitor facing the windows directly behind me (in my dream, north). At one point, I turn around to look out the jalousie windows. There seems to be at least one additional (fictional) large window, immediately to the left of the door to the carport.

      This variation is unusual in that it seems to be the first time the house has been directly rendered in the middle of a seemingly large city (though there were many early precognitive dreams concerning the new highway and such at the back of our property). There is even a well-maintained city street (and sidewalks) close to the house where the northern side yard (and the orange grove beyond) would otherwise be, running east and west. Also, the playground from my elementary school has replaced our large front yard though as if being another city block west of us. There is a shorter chain-link fence along that part of the sidewalk, the sidewalk of which replaces our long real-life driveway (the playground area being open in reality and which otherwise faced the rest of the school grounds). I do not know what would be in our backyard and easterly as we remain in our bedroom throughout my dream.

      Two (unknown) teenage girls are walking from the west along the chain-link fence on our side of the street. Eventually, it is a group of four girls. There is also an older male and his wife or girlfriend walking from the same direction at one point, about ten feet ahead of the girls.

      I decide to close all the windows for privacy in case my wife and I become more intimate. I close two windows (including the fictional one) without incident. However, when I go to close the outside door’s jalousie window, the handle wobbles (as a different one did in real life until I finally fixed it) and a glass pane falls out from near a lower row and smashes in our carport. This is an odd incident though, as there is an additional somewhat confusing and uncertain aspect to it by which I also somehow “feel” the weight and momentum of the event as it happens (an odd but vivid perception not possible in reality but which has occurred in dreams). At the same time I was closing our window, the older male, as he was walking easterly by with his partner (to the left of her), apparently threw a large (unknown) object into our carport (possibly something of ours that was in the carport - I get the vague impression of a golf club but we never had any in reality) so that it hit the window as I was closing it, which possibly is what caused the pane to come out. There is the idea that the male was also startled by the window breaking even though he was seemingly (possibly absentmindedly) vandalizing the place (even though he is about sixty and seems dressed neatly). I call out “hey” and the couple continues to walk out of view, but walking a little faster now.

      I mention to my wife about how “they” broke our window, but by this point, the group of four girls (mostly all in blue jeans and singlets) is there just north of the carport (on the fictional sidewalk) who think I am accusing them. They all stop and look into the carport and through the jalousie window of the door. I notice that the area seems fairly built-up and see what may be stores and taller commercial buildings across the (fictional) street in the semidarkness. One of the girls talks about how it was not her or any of her friends who broke the window and she talks about the male who is no longer in the immediate area. I am aware of who did it, of course, but I do not coherently confirm this to them. They do not seem angry or even annoyed at any point, though. They continue to hang around and I guess they are worried about getting into trouble for something they did not do. However, I am still contemplating on whether the window coincidentally broke when something was thrown near the door and perhaps was not directly broken by the older male. As I wake, I am trying to gather my thoughts in a manner that I can tell them to go on their way and not worry about our broken window, without insulting them or giving them cause for them to believe I think they were vandalizing the house but for some reason, I cannot logically come up with how to communicate this at all as my dream fades.

      Updated 09-22-2015 at 01:40 PM by 1390

      Categories
      memorable , non-lucid
    5. Rocking Horse Epilogue

      by , 01-16-2015 at 07:16 AM
      Morning of January 16, 2015. Friday.



      In the first scene in my dream, I end up fishing near an isolated boathouse (east of where I am) for a short time, and I get the impression it is near the Black River in La Crosse (though I have not fished there in over twenty years). It is not really my intention to fish at first, and I am aware that I do not have a fishing license, but I discover that I have a fishing rod so I decide to try it to see if anything happens. There is already a larger treble hook on my line with no bait. Even though there is no bait, I lower the line close to the wharf into the murky water. I am hoping no one else shows up, especially if I catch a fish. After vividly (and accurately) feeling movement related to my line, I realize that the hook may become snagged on man-made debris or aquatic plants. Such is the case the first couple of times I feel tugs when reeling back in, but then there is an obvious weight pulling and moving the line for a time. At first I think it may be a large, perhaps even dangerous fish, but It turns out to only be a bluegill and I lift it up out of the water fairly quickly.

      I am soon more clearly aware of being bilocated in the kitchen on Loomis Street and the specific area I had been fishing in is bilocated with the Loomis Street bathroom, near the bathtub, but in a very subtle “invisible” sense for the most part, other than the kitchen features being more in view at one point. I am mostly also still outside on a wharf fishing in the river. My wife walks into the kitchen aka wharf (more specifically - an ambiguous composite perspective of being indoors and outdoors at the same time but quite common in my dreams since earliest memory) and I say to her, “look at this” with the idea that I could catch more fish and - as I am already in the kitchen - could just clean them as I catch them for a meal later on. However, due to the ambiguity of the bilocated features, I decide to throw the fish back (even though I sense it will not live) in case a game warden shows up on the wharf.

      After I pull the hook out of the fish’s gills (where it was mostly snagged) with very well-rendered aspects at this point (including sense of touch), and throw it back, my dream shifts into a completely different scenario…

      It is related to a dark-haired male that had recently graduated from high school, though there are several other unknown people around. This is a fictional tulpa-like character and persona that I created (from scratch) in the 1980s, named Alan T. Another character, also tulpa-based, yet somewhat reminiscent of Christian Slater, is another relevant character. From here, my dream begins to make fun of the incomprehensibly stupid idea “your mind cannot create new people”. I find this interesting since it follows the other dream scene relative to a real-life event where a fabricated charge of fishing without a license was given when I was younger (the officer actually took my valid license to hide it in an attempt to make it look like I did not have one, but then decided to give it back when I mentioned my brother-in-law was the other male in the area - though his report had already been fabricated as such and appeared as such - “fishing without a license” - in court). I think this combined set of dream scenes (at least to this point) has to do with the fact that much of mainstream society has no credibility or validity in what they say or believe, especially certain forms of “let’s just randomly fill-in-the-blanks” authority. My real-life false arrest was mostly to meet a quota (I even heard them talking about this from another room at the time) - and is in complete contrast to naïve people who believe you have to do something wrong to be arrested or go to jail. I pleaded “no contest”, meaning “guilty” (relevant to time already served in this case - only because my brother-in-law was ready to go to the newspaper and expose them if I was not released) for a false charge based on a nonexistent event and fabricated report - and it is my strong belief (again, based on experience) that this probably happens all the time but no one really says or does anything.

      In my dream, Alan seems concerned over why he cannot remember Eddie (the other tulpa). This is something to do with a wampum belt being similar to rosary beads in trying to recover lost memories. The scene “resets” and repeats at least once. I talk to the tulpa Alan, asking if his name is Alan, and he says yes. He seems suspicious of his own past and the idea of “fictional people” (even though I am not lucid or focused on the idea of dreaming of fictional characters). Eddie seems to find this all amusing and actually seems aware of my dream’s “reset” and repeat of meeting Alan, though Alan does not remember what had just happened minutes ago. Eventually, the scenario loses cohesion and the scene shifts completely again.

      Kenny and Karen’s house in Florida is now in Wisconsin and about four houses south of my sister’s old home on Loomis Street. I look inside through the front door and note that Kenny and Karen are not living there. Instead, there are two unknown people; male and female. The unknown male is sitting on an armchair facing the open front door. An unknown girl rides by on a bicycle, heading south. I call out to her (“hey”) and mentally “demand” she joins me (though I do not know her name). She gets off her bicycle and approaches me but then soon goes into the house with the other unknown people. More new fictional people show up. An older very unusual-looking lady (too unusual to be a real human face but still perceived as such) hugs me. Her hips are too far apart to be those of a real human being and she is otherwise apparently skinny. Even though I am not lucid, a residual conscious thought is present for a short time and that is…the idea “your mind cannot create new people” is far more absurd every time you hear it, almost “snowballing” (exponentially) in its stupidity. This is especially true in that people’s features in dreams are sometimes completely unlike actual human beings (not quite “alien” in many cases, but too unusual to be linked to real human faces - like many other surreal aspects of dreams). My wife Zsuzsanna is eventually with me. I am soon with the rest of my family and the unknown people, of whom there are about a dozen or so standing near the road in some sort of outdoor neighborhood party, perhaps.

      At this point, a large rocking horse appears in the street. This seems to be some sort of untimely catalyst of some kind. My dream shifts into its most unusual stage. I get on the rocking horse (being fully aware of my present age; an atypical perspective oddly enough) and sit comfortably as it speeds down the street (without wheels of any kind) while rocking very slowly at the same time. I enjoy the feeling of incredible horizontal speed as well as the simultaneous quite slow rocking back and forth. It is almost like a trip to my “final destination” (likely due to an extreme dehydration and hyperventilation event, due to me being stupid just a couple of days ago - when I thought that was “the end” for me and I almost collapsed in the street - coincidentally, my wife’s closest friend’s husband did collapse in the street elsewhere, though actually died). During this time, the sky above plays a loud and dramatic fictional instrumental version (like the Henry Mancini version but about twice as fast and with deeper, louder strings in the lead) of “Windmills of Your Mind”. (This song - the original version - always sounded “wrong” to me due to the slower speed relative to the contrast of its otherwise torrent-like melody, but I still came to like it. When I performed it on organ or accordion, I did play it much faster.)

      I ride the rocking horse up and down the same street (turning back upon arriving at the Loomis and Gillette intersection each time) about six times.

      I eventually stop and get off where I started from, and meet with my wife again, who is now a teenager. I notice that my clothes are uncomfortably filled with dusty heavy gravel from the street (even though it is an urban paved street in reality). Gravel in my clothes is possibly a play on “grave”.

      Updated 11-29-2015 at 09:11 AM by 1390

      Categories
      memorable
    6. Journey Through Space and Across Dimensions

      by , 12-20-2014 at 09:41 AM
      Morning of December 20, 2014. Saturday.



      I find myself firstly on my own at my (deceased) sister Marilyn’s house. It does not come to mind that my sister had not lived there that long after I moved to Australia or yet that she had died in February of this year. However, I do begin to remember that many of my relatives had died fairly recently. In my dream, though, I soon but incorrectly “remember” that my sister Marilyn had died a couple years before my mother.

      I seem to have died as well and am presently in a transitory state prior to where I will then be “living”. My sister actually appears (as she was when about thirty) and sits down next to me in the living room. I ask her how I died and she tells me about seeing atomic bombs in various parts of the world on the television news. In the back of my mind, I wonder if I will be seeing my wife and children. I ask her where her husband is. Apparently he is still alive somewhere.

      Eventually, the setting becomes surreal, but not directly threatening or nightmarish. I find myself in a different region that is apparently some sort of long-term “limbo” or type of purgatory. The supposed “leader” or main authority of this place is the god Pan, who seems quite narcissistic and somewhat sadistic. All of the other “people” remind me somewhat of “Grimm’s” (the television series) Wesen characters, but not specific ones. One girl in particular is being “punished” over time to the point of appearing ill and weak. However, as this is a form of limbo where people have already died, she cannot die again (at least at this point).

      She is apparently being tortured (in a supposed religious sense) for her prior lascivious nature. However, being physically “punished” for lasciviousness or consensual pleasure with someone else’s righteous sadism sounds insane, as if this limbo universe has become corrupt at the liminal stage after one dies. In the back of my mind, this causes me to question the entire nature of religion and the concept of righteousness itself. How I had not “automatically” reached this understanding as a child causes me to dwell on the “Land of the Living” also being corrupted somehow, to where falsehood is religiously impressed from a very early age, and which may actually be relative to why death itself exists.

      In the back of my mind, I am trying to “remember” who Pan really is in this scenario, though I am not yet lucid. Some of the other people who have supposedly died recently are smaller animals now, which has something to do with their lack of willpower. Although Pan is still technically Pan, he now has a few subtle squirrel-like features, including the ears. It begins to dawn on me that he may actually be a “disturbed” person I have only ever read the journal of in reality; an older male who is against sexuality, against having a family and especially against having children, while at the same time elevating animals to the level of human sentience, including squirrels. This would explain the “Grimm” Wesen presence in-dream. I am not looking forward to being tortured and mindlessly “judged” by someone else’s skewed idea of religion or spirituality, and even though I am not yet fully lucid, I begin to take full control of this other dimension. I believe that continuous mental alchemy and “truth incarnate” will “fix” this limbo universe.

      I start by healing the girl Wesen closest to me. It may be a younger version of my wife, but her persona is not fully defined. I place my hand on her chest and I remember that she also needs to reestablish her strength and awareness from the inside to take full control of her own physical presence in this dimension. My fingers merge into and below her skin to interface with her arrhythmic heart and I tell her to focus on and affirm “I am restored to my healthiest state” although this slightly corrupts into “I restore myself to my healthiest state” (which I can hear her saying a few times) implying omniscience over the passive “thank you for restoring me to my healthiest state” implying that others exist in this universe (other than the unified “I am”). It is however, important that she recognizes her omniscience to be fully protected against Pan. Eventually, she seems to be healthier and steadier on her feet and I feel her growing stronger and more “complete”.

      When Pan approaches me and assumes an authoritative pose, I easily pull his heart from his chest and it eventually crumbles in my hand, flowing like sand from my fist as his body falls apart into small pieces. At this point, the scene shifts…

      Pan and the Wesen girl and several others, now all fully human, are lying on their sides unclothed on the deck of a large ship moving through waters near Antarctica, seemingly back on Earth - and we are all in living bodies again. “What the f—?” shouts the former Pan, now shivering and appearing very vulnerable in contrast to his former faux “glory”.

      I mentally create a thick jacket and outfit for the girl so that she is not cold (as she no longer has the fur of a Wesen). It is “painted” onto her as she stands up. The former Pan says something about religion, sin, and dreams and I say “Oh shut up you narcissistic fake - you know nothing about dreams” and the scene immediately shifts to distant outer space. It is as if I mentally lift and “throw” the entire ship we are on into outer space, even with pieces of ice and globs of water following us in the momentum for a time. However, we are now millions of miles from Earth on the other side of the galaxy. The immediate setting still seems the same but it is now like an imperial cruiser from “Star Wars”, though that is not what it actually is. It is a spaceship, though, being piloted by aliens that have never seen people from Earth even though they are exactly like human beings themselves (except more intelligent, it seems).

      We all go inside and walk around. It is very spacious. I ask one of the males if his planet is called “Earth” and he says no. He says that they had only studied Earth at times and watch the television and radio transmissions of humans as well as the nearly endless “false” dimensions and religious realms humans create. One male says “It looks like Pan’s realm is gone”, watching the distorted horizontal bars and static on the monitor where that realm had existed prior to my dissolution of it. “It was him,” says another male, pointing to me, and I am seen as a “hero” in a sense and am given an extensive tour of the ship that seems to last a long time. The ship seems to be powered by the ice of comets being slowly exposed to plasma from stars or the manipulation of Bose-Einstein condensates and perhaps a form of magnetism - I see pieces of a recently taken comet in a large room. Another tells me that they will take me (and the others) back to Earth. They are all extremely friendly and accommodating in every way and not at all condescending regardless of their superiority.

      I feel extraordinarily happy; comfortable in their presence, and secure. I stand on the deck of the ship and assume there is an additional oxygen layer (in spherical form) around the ship, which allows one to freely see all of space and still be able to breathe. I am correct in this assumption, and I also notice that the aliens have set up a holographic section in front of the ship that seems to be showing the ending credits of a movie (perhaps to make the former Pan feel more at home). It seems silly to be watching the closing credits of a movie superimposed against the backdrop of “real” outer space while standing on the external deck of a huge alien spacecraft, but it does not concern me that much. I feel subtle movements inside my head (which I have had in dreams before but which are not possible in reality) and “harmonic” sensations as I seem fully open to the aliens and the universe itself “reading my mind” completely. I welcome this. I am fully open. In fact, the more open I am, the more the dream (and the universe itself) is fully and solely “mine”.

      I admire the beauty of Earth as we approach…still feeling fully open to any telepathic force that chooses to “read” me. Because, above all, I have endless faith in who I am and any imposition would only validate me further. I can feel the energies in my head shift to a more defined harmonic resonance. It feels fantastic.

      Updated 06-17-2015 at 10:32 AM by 1390 (Enhancement)

      Categories
      memorable , lucid
    7. Wheels

      by , 12-10-2014 at 10:31 AM
      Morning of December 10, 2014. Wednesday.



      This was another atypical dream that was quite impersonal yet at the same time very vivid and somehow seemingly connected to something very important, though ambiguous and mystical as well. Something in-dream puzzles me in a negative sense. It is not quite ominous but almost (though vaguely).

      I discover a large cave which seemingly has something to do with my family history…

      Before getting into this, there is another dream or dream segment prior to this one. It seems quite random in the associations. I am in the living room on Loomis Street and my sister (deceased) “visits” as if the house is not hers at the time. However, she looks a little more like an Alaskan Native who I only saw once in real life when she visited my sister’s husband. Over time, however, I notice that I had been talking to an unfamiliar Caucasian male. He is talking about the War of 1812 and some other historical events connected with my family yet also mentions Arawak (rather than the actual Shawnee relationship) and I see it on a piece of paper he is showing me. A person changing completely from one to another has happened before in my dreams but is not all that common, and although I am quite aware it has happened I do not say anything or become fully lucid.

      In a seemingly unrelated set of circumstances, I go into a large cave and from here, there are very strange and atypical perspectives. The cave seems to hold an infinite collection of golden “wheels” though the imagery and vague thoughts make me somewhat puzzled and almost uncomfortable. There is one large wheel that is a version of Vitruvian Man, which seems to be the main “real” wheel and the first one produced by perhaps an ancient entity or extinct civilization.

      Along the wall, standing on edge, are thousands of other “wheels”, mostly all identical, portraying either a young boy (I vaguely perceive to be a younger version of myself at one point) or girl in the same manner as Vitruvian Man but seemingly only endless copies thereof. I am not sure what to think and I am not sure of their purpose. They are life-sized. I ponder if they could possibly represent real people somehow (for an unexplained reason), though that seems unlikely since, again, the smaller wheels all seem like duplicates. Still, there is a strong sense of mystery and possibly a mystical anomaly. (Interestingly, there is no in-dream adult “Vitruvian Woman” that I know of though I may have missed it.) There does seem to be more to them than their potential of just being wheels. A pentagram is visible and fairly defined over the Vitruvian Man image, and the same is true for the other “wheels”.

      In reality, the pentagram is only an assumption associated with Vitruvian Man, and there is also one version with an added hexagram (a completely different perspective), as well as a square divided into four triangles and many other variations of entirely different associations. This seems to be evidence, in a way, of how people “pigeonhole” their own thoughts into a different perspective than the evidence given (even of their own eyes) while not relating to the views or experiences of others. For example, I have validated thousands of detailed precognitive experiences (far too visually precise to be coincidence - and I certainly cannot “unremember” what has happened in my life since birth) on a day to day basis - even based my life’s continuity on that reliability and “dreams becoming real” (especially in marrying my seemingly predestined “mystery girl” - or at least attained by my soul through childhood remote viewing - which seems the only possible explanation), yet many others seem to be lacking the ability to believe such a perspective while many others have it minimally but not every day and only some seem to use it actively (other than for personal contemplation).

      There must be a reason while some (such as myself) are “allowed to get that far” so to speak while many others (even older than me) do not even believe in it in the first place (as well as holding onto hundreds of outdated myths about dreams), so thus never even “begin” to enter dream work potential (even those who have supposedly documented their dreams for a long time). They also have an entirely different view of life, often defeatist or negative in relationship to my own path, and I clearly remember thinking this even at a very young age. This perhaps is my strangest puzzle - even stranger now in the apex of my life’s path (or maybe it is only the beginning of a new potential apex regardless of my age - my own landlady lived to be over a hundred after all).

      The very meaning of “average” or “normal” is by that which is not average, common, or normal at all. In other words, “average” only comes about by combining everything and then dividing it - which then only presents a mundane and skewed view of what really exists or is possible (especially regarding outliers such as myself, but outliers in general, including long-term diverse experiences).

      I do not yet know the meaning behind this particular dream yet, though. There is a vague association in afterthought with the John Lennon song “Watching the Wheels” though I doubt this was the main instigation for this particular dream.

      Updated 06-17-2015 at 12:58 PM by 1390 (Enhancement)

      Tags: wheels
      Categories
      non-lucid , memorable
    8. Vivid Sandstorm

      by , 12-08-2014 at 06:50 AM
      Morning of December 8, 2014. Monday.



      This is possibly the first time I have dreamt of such an event, at least in such a vivid way and over a longer time period (my dream being quite long). Even though it is a natural disaster dream, there is a feeling of continual interest and excitement though I am not lucid. The imagery, especially at the end, is quite attractive.

      I am not sure where my wife and family and I are living. It seems to be in La Crosse but in an area I have not actually ever lived in reality - it seems like it is likely to be a certain part of Wood Street. Our front yard seemingly faces the west. After a time, a sandstorm approaches from the east. We are firstly indoors. Over time, there are at least four waves. At one point, I hold onto our youngest daughter to help keep the sand from her eyes and to stop her from wandering off.

      We are outside with other people at the front of our house, which we use for protection from the strong wind and dust at times. A powerful “wave” of sand approaches and knocks the roof off the house to the right of ours. Also, cars and buses are being carried through the air and dropped a fair distance away. Our house is not damaged in any way even though most others are in the immediate area.

      The scenes are rendered very realistically for the most part, except for the appearance of the sky at the end, which is slightly surreal, though I do feel a sense of peace and bliss. At one point, we walk more towards the east (by about three blocks) for some reason, and I look up to see that the sky is filled with very small glowing clouds, sort of trapezoidal in shape and mostly equidistant and in at least eight rows. There are no signs of anymore dust clouds or indication of threat. Daylight is somewhat visible as if it is near dawn.

      “It looks like the storm is over,” I say, and an unknown neighbor agrees.

      It is possible that my dream signified “shifting my thoughts” in certain ways in preparation for enhanced dream work in 2015. After all, a sandstorm does change the landscape somewhat, the resulting sand dunes being in different locations after the event.

      Updated 06-20-2015 at 08:39 PM by 1390

      Categories
      non-lucid , memorable
    9. A personal examination of the “eternity bridge” parallels

      by , 12-05-2014 at 02:38 PM
      Night of December 5, 2014. Friday. Extensive notes only.



      Although I presently have only 1,605 dream-related documents on tumblr (with continuing reference enhancements being added on each over time), which represents only a tiny fraction of my guess of at least 40,000 total, I plan on enhancing my dream work yet again in 2015 (which had already accelerated back in 1968 as a child). This will now start with a number of articles on my personal findings. This of course, is to be very meticulous and “wordy” and is certainly not for the casual reader unless they are seeking techniques for finding relationships in dream elements over a lifetime or are interested in the controversial knowledge that I acquired over the many years.

      Here, I will address a recurring fictional location feature that is not only fictional but also “bilocated” with my childhood home in Cubitis. Bilocation (especially of environmental features) has been a very dominant aspect of my dreams since earliest memory, yet I have rarely read about it in the dream work of others. I do not typically include it in my online entries.

      What does this mean? Basically, this “eternity bridge” is seemingly a metaphor for my lifespan but only began in November of 1969 (when I first interacted with Susan R a little more). For some reason I have not worked out, November 6 also seems to be the main date where extremely unusual and unexplainable events center around me personally (though I was born on December 20, 1960). I have not solved this enigma, yet.

      The “eternity bridge” (short form of what I called it as a child, both “bridge to eternity” and “bridge over a prehistoric world”) is always of the same directional orientation, but not always the same implied height. The first existence of this bridge was bilocated in the northern side yard expanse of my Cubitis house where a shed was in reality - which was the very large building my father built. That is, although my dream’s location was implied to be a completely unknown region, I was simultaneously aware of the bridge’s eventual trilocation (again, very common in my dreams throughout my lifetime). This includes the following details:

      The bridge itself was a wooden bridge (actually a plank and rope bridge, but which did not sway very noticeably) - the first version with more and more missing planks as I walked easterly. It was apparently in an isolated region and its first apparent “intent” was to place me over a “prehistoric world” (though with a “futuristic domed city” on the western perimeter, which seemingly contradicts the established “east is the future” association), which I fell into due to stepping near an area with a missing plank.

      At the same time, the bridge was bilocated over my Cubitis backyard, northernmost of the house and technically over the rabbit shed. It has never been primarily bilocated anywhere else, only in this exact (fictional) placement, though its last presence being actually a ground-level back road, and just prior to that, a bridge over the “ocean” (the ocean also being in my Cubitis backyard but with skewed perspective).

      Near the main version of my dream’s ending it was then also trilocated over the street just south of the West Elementary school building. The area where I met the “mystery girl”, in this case in the form of Brenda W (validated paranormal future wife archetype) and where I seemed to become intensely “within” her (regardless of my young age) was bilocated with the playground; more specifically, the white concrete bench Brenda was sitting on (which had fancy floral scrolls and a cyan essence) and the large oak tree, was bilocated via the northwest corner of the playground as an area of the domed city (Atlantis implied). (The “same” bench, though far more plain, is there in that bilocated spot in reality.) Curiously, the trilocation here was a specific spot in my Cubitis bedroom, fairly close to where I was sleeping at the time.

      Only a few people have been in this specific scenario with me over a lifetime. The first main version began with Susan R (the only person other than my wife Zsuzsanna, who I had a seemingly paranormal connection to) walking westerly in the opposite direction to where Brenda and I first ended up walking (however, Brenda does eventually go back but ends up in the domed futuristic city where I reunite with her later). Susan actually walked diagonally down an implied ramp just prior to the implied but ambiguous “entry point” of the beginning of the bridge, which would have been bilocated with the entry point of our Cubitis carport. She had the Blue Pearl (aka “divine blue flame”) event visible around her, though her direction of which suggested she was no longer in my long-term future and I was then “with Brenda W” (though remember she represented my actual future wife long before I knew of her). Brenda then goes back due to more and more planks missing, but I continue on, seemingly out of curiosity or perhaps stubbornness. This suggests that the verified future with the “mystery girl” (my real-life wife) was still being “built” by unknown forces (yet I first had to “explore other scenarios”), though as described earlier, I do end up with her. Brenda W did not have the Blue Pearl associated with her until a very short time before first real-life contact with my wife-to-be many years later, in a very intense dream of a huge blue sun near the “eternity bridge”, but this time more clearly associated with my Cubitis backyard.

      Typically, Susan R seemed linked to Christian associations (as my potential partner in life which she seemed to “know” as well) and Brenda W, the “dark mystery” and gypsy (Roma) associations, not in a negative sense, but in a “cheerful” though mysterious futuristic sense - and in the end it was the “mystery girl” who “won” as described in several other entries.

      Also, the fact that I met her in a futuristic domed city at the end (though under the bridge in the otherwise prehistoric world), resolved it as very long-term precognitive. In a later version of the dream, we climbed the tree (trilocated with the domed city area, the playground tree, and the Tree of Knowledge in another part of town - which also appeared in a dream around the same time period where Susan R was seated on the “same” bench and crying - later elements of that dream borrowed from “Gay Purr-ee” and which I eventually will go into in another entry) back to the beginning of the “timeline”/bridge.

      The “eternity bridge” existence in my dream universe is still going strong. The only relevant associated “players” (other than myself) thus far have been:

      Susan R (with Blue Pearl “envelope”) - (late 1960s, early 1970s)
      Brenda W and additional ambiguous “mystery girl” composites (1969 through 1990/91)
      my beautiful wife Zsuzsanna (since 1991, though we did not marry until 1994)
      (as of this month - December 2014) youngest son Oliver, though only in the ground-level area below it.

      Assuming the “eternity bridge” is some sort of lifespan or fixed life path construct, I have to question some nuances of my last dream. In the “same” area where I fell through a missing plank area in the first version in 1969, I now, at ground level in December 2014, discover large rusty nails (which I place in a glass Coke bottle so that people will not step on them) which I also vaguely associate with the crucifixion (I am not Christian, by the way). This is cross-dream bilocated with where Oliver seemed to no longer be present in the ocean view dream (though I did not see him as endangered in any way). In one “reset” of the first “eternity bridge” dream set, I go off from the side of the bridge down a south staircase, which was precognitive of several sparse events - one being related to my father’s eventual chicken farm in that same spot, and another matching a location in Brisbane I did not see in reality until I met my wife-to-be in 1994.

      In order to truly understand the paranormal (for lack of a better term) nature of this, one would have to understand thousands of validated associations and personal experiences, which of course, is not even possible for the average person (the majority of people cannot even get past a short dream entry of mine unless they have a genuine interest). I can only relate some of the more defined and continuously rendered scenarios of which I am most familiar with.

      Any comments or questions on any of this are very welcomed and appreciated.

      Updated 06-20-2015 at 08:36 PM by 1390

      Categories
      memorable , side notes
    10. Ocean View Replaces Cubitis Backyard

      by , 12-02-2014 at 06:02 PM
      Morning of December 2, 2014. Tuesday.



      Once again, I travel back into “history”, though my Cubitis backyard becomes part of a fictional composite; this time there is an ocean that is mainly south and east instead of the backyard itself, though our house is still there, otherwise looking the same somehow. A high commercial concrete bridge seems to extend east of the carport (with highly ambiguous access plausibility), continuing easterly as far as the eye can see (taking on the implication of my recurring “eternity bridge” regarded in my note below*). I am with my wife Zsuzsanna. Our youngest son Oliver had been playing near the water at one point. It is almost as if we were originally going to go see the ocean (several miles away to the south at first) but instead, the ocean “came to us”.

      (*Note: This more commercial bridge has something in common with an equally fictional wooden bridge in the exact same location and orientation from a childhood dream, where it was above a prehistoric swamp, which also seemed to be my backyard at one point though the overall setting was ambiguous as if bilocated.)

      I am not sure where our son is at one point, but I do not think he is in any danger. I get the impression that he may be under the bridge on a sandbar. Several items are floating south on the ocean’s surface, each of which our son had been using but had abandoned. There is an inflatable raft, two empty green wheelie bins mostly submerged diagonally, a half-deflated inflatable mattress for a swimming pool, and at least two other items I do not recall. The items are far apart from each other.

      Our view seems about thirty feet above the water at this point as I continue to gaze southerly. The floating items seem quite far away to the south as well as far below. I am annoyed at the prospect of having to go out and somehow bring all the items back, especially as they are drifting farther away. My perspective is quite skewed however, as it would be impossible for the view to seem that far away while still supposedly in range of our implied backyard.

      In a short time from this point, my dream quite drastically changes the bridge area where I am standing and mostly enjoying the view from - into then being a low section where my wife and I are lying down on a regular mattress floating on the water but our mattress being somehow fixed in position to the rest of the bridge as if it was a part of it. I do not even seem to notice this rather extreme change in height or the silliness of the design. Looking at the water, which is very realistic, I am aware of the approaching shadow of a very large fish about two feet under the surface, which I take to be a shark and which slowly swims easterly, past us. There seem to be a few larger fish, one possibly a tuna, but I mostly see only one at a time. I tell my wife about the shark and move back from the edge in case it comes closer to the surface (but it does not).

      I am eventually somewhat concerned for our son, but I seem to realize that he is probably not in the water at this point. Interestingly, I am eventually vaguely aware that I am creating the shark and the other shadowy submerged forms though I am not at all lucid. (This has often happened before, where I had a subtle awareness that I was creating my dream - even the eerie or threatening aspects - yet was not remotely lucid at any point - in a sense that I knew I was manifesting everything but did not actually know I was in a dream state and did not contemplate taking conscious control at any point. It sometimes seems more about “making a movie” or even avant-garde art.)

      My wife is to my right, though beyond that side of our mattress is a far less defined environment, which I am not sure is water (the ocean continued northerly) or a half-wall of the old shed (which would occupy the space in reality). I have a vague concern about the shark going in that direction but sense some sort of “barrier”. There is nothing nightmarish about any emotions I hold, even though the perspective is quite vivid. I turn on my side and wake from my dream (in the same position implied in my dream) though I had not moved at all in reality.

      Updated 09-10-2015 at 12:01 PM by 1390

      Categories
      memorable
    11. Golden Cobra and Angelic Healing (with study guide)

      by , 12-01-2014 at 06:01 PM
      Morning of December 1, 2014. Monday.



      This entry has been abridged and reformatted for use as a study guide.



      In my dream, my family and I as we appear now are living on Gellibrand Street in Clayfield. I am uncertain of the time. My beautiful wife Zsuzsanna confronts a golden cobra that had gotten into our apartment. The activity occurs on our porch. There is an extraordinary awareness of perfect movement and rhythm. She is apparently going to catch it without difficulty. Her visage exhibits no fear. They slowly sway in amazing contrast to each other’s movements and Zsuzsanna exhibits knowledge of martial arts stances. It is like watching a perfect analogy to ballet. Zsuzsanna faces the open entrance to our bedroom (which was originally designed to be a living room) while the snake mostly faces the porch windows.



      Eventually, my dream self’s level of awareness changes. I do not want Zsuzsanna to be in any danger even though she seems adapt at what she is presently doing as if she had done it many times before. I am able to capture the cobra and soon throw it out the back door, which is now that of the Loomis Street house in America. Its open mouth goes over my hand a few times on the way to the back door, but I am in no danger and its bite does not break the skin.



      In the next dream segment, my family and I had gone shopping. I soon realize, looking down, that I am walking on a narrow board that is elevated about three feet from the ground, which is supposedly where many people walk to get from store to store at the shopping mall. The board is no wider than one of my feet. I get really annoyed with this setup and verbally express how ridiculous it is. I jump off and walk along the normal sidewalk from that point.

      Soon, I am wondering where our children are and I become worried. Our oldest son is present but the other four are elsewhere. I go under the house, which is a larger and more elevated version of the Clayfield house, and I see that there is water everywhere as well as larger stones.

      I have to pull our second-youngest son out of an apparently unused pipe. Our oldest daughter is there and her feet had become stuck when trying to help him. Our youngest son is farther down in the same pipe but I manage to get him out as well, carefully maneuvering him past a couple jagged rocks as I pull him up. They are weak and ill from the cold water. I find an unfamiliar toddler lying on her back who does not appear to be breathing. I first think she is ours, but then she turns out to be a doll, but then turns into someone else’s child and starts giggling and seems healthy. Eventually, our toddler daughter is with the others. We are then immediately all at a hospital (as if having teleported), but in a mostly featureless room with no beds so everyone has to lie on the floor, although a nurse gets a few blankets. I notice that all the children have black fingernails, which indicates frostbite. They are still shivering and seemingly ill.

      From here, I project waves of light from my hands, which eventually comes from my entire body. It makes everyone healthier and stronger over time. During this time, I look in a mirror and see a light blue halo over my head as well as patterns of light that resemble holographic angel wings.



      Study questions. I am deliberately including questions meant to expose how asinine “interpretation” is (in the popular usage of the term):

      Why did my dream render the porch setting?

      Why did my dream render the cobra?

      Why was the cobra golden?

      What did Zsuzsanna represent?

      What did the rescue situation represent?

      What does the toddler to doll to toddler represent?

      What is the origin of this dream?



      Answers to the above questions:

      A porch is a type of autosymbolism that I create to serve as a liminal space buffer during RAS (reticular activating system) mediation, which I learned to do when I was four years old. It has ZERO to do with symbolism in the conventional sense or any factor of real life. It represents a specific state of consciousness that delays RAS modulating the dream state.

      The cobra comes from four factors, the fourth explained in the next answer. Factor one is subliminal (non-lucid) control of RAS mediation, which otherwise pulls a dreamer out of the dream state. Factor two is vestibular system correlation, the most dominant factor of both lucid and non-lucid dream control, which is based on controlling the perception of the illusory dream body, the main factor of flying dreams. Factor three stems from lucid dreaming at age five, when I often created and controlled a cobra in a hayloft while standing in the center of the floor of a barn.

      Gold dominates the dream state when I become semi-lucid (and is autosymbolism for an increase in dream state awareness) in the last stages of RAS mediation. In this case, I did not wake but shifted into a different dream scenario.

      Zsuzsanna literally represented Zsuzsanna, though was also the vestibular system correlation (type 2) avatar in this case, and also held a nuance of our oldest son, who is experienced in martial arts. My dream combined these dynamics just as it combined the two houses I had lived in.

      The rescue attempt is semi-lucid dream state reinduction using the “giving birth” analogy. The presence of water tells me what factor of ultradian rhythm I am in and has ZERO to do with waking life or waking life emotions.

      The toddler scenario is a precursory emergent consciousness thread and simulacrum. The changes signify my varying levels of control of RAS mediation and changes in level of awareness within the dream state. Otherwise, a doll is autosymbolic of physical inactivity while asleep. The trick is to project the association into a simulacrum or avatar without waking up.

      The healing scenario stems from autoscripting, though only the foundation, using such as “I am of the healing energies of Universal Mind”. Be aware that using “healing energies” in autoscripting will probably create a random scenario (as here) where healing is needed. Using “Universal Mind” may result in contact with the transpersonal interconsciousness or your own transformation in the dream state into an angelic being. (Do NOT use “healing” when actually needing to be healed; only use “I am the continuity of maximum well-being”. This was given to me by The Source years ago.)


      Updated 07-14-2018 at 07:50 PM by 1390

      Tags: cobra
      Categories
      memorable
    12. Undemolisher

      by , 10-24-2014 at 08:43 AM
      Morning of October 24, 2014. Friday.



      This is the third vivid dream in a row where I had eventual unlimited control of the dream yet was not lucid at all, just in control of the dream’s scenario while expressing endless “ability”.

      My family and I are living back in the old large Barolin Street house (which was moved in reality - and my family was actually endangered by people throwing rocks at the assumed empty place a few times and we also had visits from wayward backpackers looking for an empty free place to sleep, all due to a misleading large sign nailed on our fence). Over time, in my dream, two male workers show up in the backyard and are apparently there to refurbish the place. My wife and children are not home when they begin their work. One male talks to me from the roof of the shed for a short time on two occasions.

      As time passes, I realize they are destroying parts of the house, including the back closed porch, before they intend to rebuild much of it. I did not realize that this was the plan - it is very imposing and potentially dangerous. I am also aware that we still have all our possessions in the house and I think about how annoying it would be should I have to dig through the remains of the soon-to-be demolished house to find everything. They have a wrecking crane in the backyard and at one point, I run into the house as it smashes much of the back of the house but I am not directly threatened, though parts of the ceiling fall farther back behind me. In fact, the younger male has to run out of the way at times as well.

      I go back to where the two men are. They seem somewhat cheerful, but I grow more and more annoyed. I angrily “order” them to replace the roof and fix what they have damaged, as I have decided that this will not be happening. They look at me curiously and I make cursing comments about the mental stability of the property owner. One male is more burly than the other, their ages seeming around thirty-something and twenty-something. He starts making rather absurd anti-family (and anti-relationship) comments - as if two people in a relationship and with a family and children is “wrong”. He then complains about me getting unemployment money, which is incorrect (though it does not dawn on me in-dream for some reason), as I have not gotten unemployment or any similar payments, including once in America when I was injured and the plant manager changed the details to the company’s benefit (a typical farce which I did not contest).

      Though he is a bit bigger and more muscular than me, I still manage to punch him twice in quick succession and knock him back over what is left of the back steps. I tell him that I will do it. I wave my hands and focus on what I want and the damage to the house starts to reverse. The previously destroyed extended back roof and its foundation starts to join together and it goes back up, all the pieces floating in midair and eventually aligning in a stronger form than before. Parts of the exterior walls come back together and go back up to restore the structure, yet also improve it. I walk under the restored roof, looking up, seeing that it is more heavy and complex than before, with steel brackets. It is still joining together at this point as I walk under it, but I do not feel at risk as I had in similar in-dream scenarios in the past, even though it would crush me if it fell.

      The older male (still lying on his back but now recovering) looks at me in awe and frustration and says something like, “You mean you just sit here in this house with your family when you can just wave your hands and do anything you want?" I am not sure how to respond (this may be a play on how my supposed intelligence stays "invisible” to the majority - though the “invisibility” seems to work “automatically” as well - though I am still not sure of the “Source”), but I do not want them back at any point. Marrying my beautiful dream girl and having a family, after all, was what I wanted in reality since earliest memory. Looking at the two stunned men, I do not know what else I could possibly want…except to be away from infantile mainstream philosophy and the infinitely irritating dominant culture.

      Updated 06-20-2015 at 08:42 PM by 1390

      Categories
      non-lucid , memorable
    13. Dream Alchemist

      by , 10-23-2014 at 04:23 PM
      Morning of October 23, 2014. Thursday.



      My dream becomes more vivid with each stage but never lucid. In the first part, I have a smaller rectangular mirror of which is a little bigger than that of a medicine cabinet’s. My family and I are living at an unknown location. I have a confident awareness that mirrors and photographs (and ultimately any plane’s surface) can be “entered” depending on the extent of focus and will. I hold up my mirror which later seems to be a photograph or print, though the image seems to change from my perspective depending on the angle I hold it. It seems to mostly show features of an empty room, though I sometimes perceive that it is reflecting the ceiling or walls of the room I am in. I attempt to put my right hand into (and beyond) its surface to see if my hand will move through it as an implied glass “portal” but it seems solid as my fingers press against the surface. My two youngest sons watch at times.

      At one point, as I am holding up my mirror, a small dog sticks its head a short distance from out of the two-dimensional plane from “inside” it (becoming three-dimensional past the threshold, just past its neck) and barks a bit as if it is confused or perhaps feels threatened. It soon vanishes and I get the impression that it may have somehow gotten out and is inside the sofa or in the room somewhere, though I do not see it again.

      Later, I seem to be rescuing people at some sort of unrealistically dangerous workplace in a commercial building. However, one person dies from a fall over a mezzanine as I am saving someone else from a fall down an elevator shaft. It seems that people are continuously accident-prone at the location, but the manager thanks me for the people I do save.

      I eventually find myself in another unknown location, though I get the sense I live in the area with my family. I am at the house of an unfamiliar neighbor; an older black woman who is talking about other people in the neighborhood, which seems to be adjacent to a long wide road. I am unsure of the implied city or country, though the house seems to be partly modeled after my older brother Earl’s previous home on Saint Cloud Street in America. A few other unfamiliar people show up. An unfamiliar Caucasian woman thinks I have special abilities, which is related to the first scenario, where plane surfaces can supposedly be “entered” and “explored”. She has a mirror and asks me if I am able to put my hand into it. I attempt it a couple times but it does not work, as my fingers merely press hard against the surface. However, I relax and notice that the mirror is somehow reflecting silverware and dishes as if I am looking down at them. Perhaps the image is somehow reflected from another area of the house. It seems to be like a rectangular silver serving tray at this point.

      I am able to feel my way into the “mirror” and pull out a large silver fork and hold it up. I start to reshape it into a three-dimensional Picasso-like figure. I mentally stretch it in a semi-circular motion as it floats in midair. At one point, small silver “threads” seem to be pulled out, to create additional detail when swept back over the piece. I give the silver figure to a random person in the house and the woman with the “mirror” faints from being astounded, falling near my right, near the end of the sofa.

      Another person has a van Gogh self-portrait print, which is about the same size as the previous “mirror”. I let my hands move into the surface and I start to pull out a small human figure made of various small pieces of felt, which have intricate detail, including the blue clothes and yellow hat. It is somewhat like a miniature rag doll or unstrung marionette, but more like a work of real art, with the “same” essence as the painting, yet also more “complete”. I know that I will give this to another person in the room. My dream starts to fade, though it is very vivid at this point (though I am still not lucid). The potential for creating three-dimensional art from pulling it out of two-dimensional “realms” seems endless.



      This dream is all about subliminal control of the dream state and because of that obvious factor, is unrelated to my waking life other than aspects being borrowed for the autosymbolic sequences. For example, the fainting woman is a known dynamic of signifying Zsuzsanna waking up and getting out of bed, thus leaving the realm of dreams (and it is similar to the common presence of The Sleeper as a first-level dream state indicator). She sleeps on my left and appears on my left in dreams when she is sleeping, but on my right if she is awake (which validates that a part of myself is always subliminally aware of being in the dream state, lucid or not). This is based on waking symbolism being oriented to the right, as my left side is less exposed to the environment in sleep (though people who do not understand dreams or the dream state will typically try to attribute it to a myth or what left or right “means”).

      The association with the mirror as a portal as well as the ambiguous association with it being as a serving tray reveals my intent of using the essence of liminal space (the transpersonal dynamics between dreaming and waking) to serve my intent in having full control of the dream state. As with a wall, a doorway, a fence, curtains, and other features, a mirror is a specific kind of liminal space divider that represents the division between the limited fictitious essence of the dream self and the conscious self identity. (However, a mirror will usually present a false view of the dream self when looked into, because it will typically display the illusory dream self, not the true conscious self identity. The only exceptions for me includes one dream in which I perceived my reflection as Zsuzsanna, though this was just before we met in real life, and another dream where I seemed to be seeing a much older Zsuzsanna as my reflection more recently.)

      The rest of this dream is based on other common factors of the dream state itself. The scene with me rescuing people from falling is based on the waking start itself and developing control of the preconscious state, of which validates the other segments of my dream as such, with the same overall intent of mastering liminal space (unrelated to waking life as it is wholly based on the nature of exploring dreams, both lucidly and non-lucidly). This includes the dog coming out from liminal space, as a dog represents obedience to the dream self as sustaining and controlling my dream and is why dog attack dreams were more common during my development of apex lucidity before I began to have control even in non-lucid dreams.

      My dream had a very positive presence and even seemed to increase my well-being.


      Updated 04-11-2018 at 07:41 AM by 1390

      Categories
      memorable
    14. Not a Leprechaun (precognitive)

      by , 10-07-2014 at 04:07 PM
      Morning of October 7, 2014. Tuesday.



      I am living with my family in an unfamiliar setting. It does not seem to be a composite of (or have features of) any known locations. Assuming the main wall which I am near at the beginning of the dream is oriented south (which feels right related to where I live now), there is a hall that goes to the south in the southeast corner of the room and a large bed comes out from the middle south-side wall. It may have a frame rather than just being on a box-spring mattress but this is not clear - it is fairly low to the floor. Just east of the bed (south wall) is at least one large brown wooden wardrobe, similar to one we actually have. I am not clear on any other layout other than the room I am in though it seems there may be a large kitchen to the west via a doorway in the northwest corner of this room.

      My youngest son is present when I look up and see a small person on top of the wardrobe sitting on his knees and looking down at us warily. It is a male but I am not sure of the age, possibly a young boy, but he seems like a weary old man in some ways. He is only about a foot and a half tall at the most. He is wearing a drab and baggy mossy green jumpsuit with a hood that covers most of his head except for a small region of his face. I say to my son, “Oh look, it’s a leprechaun”. I ask him if he is hungry and he nods tentatively. I reason that a rat or two may have stolen his last meal, which was probably only a bread crumb.

      I reach up and take him down with a hand on each hip, trying not to hurt him. I stand him on the floor near my son and continue to say “Look…it’s a leprechaun”. My son seems interested in seeing this “magical creature” in our house. After a time, I realize that it is probably not a leprechaun but just a homeless man that had found his way into the house and had been hiding in the walls for a time. This seems a fairly common occurrence. I tell him that I am sorry for calling him a leprechaun but that my son likes leprechauns (false in-dream memory). He does not seem to mind and then seems more like a boy with a disease that is linked to why he is so small. He seems a bit unsteady so I place him in the bed because he says he has a medipack of food he needs for nourishment. He needs to place it directly into his stomach which is fitted through a tube on his side.

      After several minutes pass, I look around and see a young plain-looking girl with shoulder-length straight blonde hair. She is looking around the corner of the edge of the hall. She does not seem familiar in any way but I seem to understand that she is the boy’s sister. I say, “oh, hello” and she leaves after smiling a short time.

      Soon after this, an older male walks partly into the room and I realize that we are being visited by possibly a friend of a member of my wife’s family in Brisbane. He does not look familiar in any way, either. I tell him that his son is having a meal and resting. I also tell him about a couple recent encounters with similar miniature people (except that one was only about six inches high) that were homeless (false memories, of course). He talks about how unfortunate it is that some people with this disease do not have homes or proper care and walks back to apparently the living room of this unknown house.

      I go to take the boy from the bed (he seems very listless and possibly ill at this point) because a mess is being made from the food pack because of a leak. I ask him if he can stand after standing him up on the floor because he seems a bit wobbly and I am not sure if he can walk very far. The food is like some sort of green mush, like mashed peas or porridge but quite runny. A lot of green goo is running over the bed and dripping down the side onto the floor. This is quite annoying and messy but I do not want to show any anger. Instead, I mention to myself that I will have to get a towel and clean it up. I am kind of glad that the people are only visiting and will not be here very often.

      My youngest son (who I was showing the rather ominous in afterthought “leprechaun” to in this dream) went to the hospital a day after this dream (has not been in several years) with some sort of totally unexpected unknown stomach virus. He seems to be doing better. Thus the typical layer of precognition (which I even sensed in-dream this time but did not want to).

      Also, something I had left out from the original entry involved a play on “leprechaun” being like “leper-con” (relative to the disease.

      Updated 09-20-2015 at 11:08 AM by 1390

      Categories
      non-lucid , memorable
    15. Saving a potential goddess?

      by , 10-03-2014 at 04:03 PM
      Morning of October 3, 2014. Friday.



      I am living in a very large castle that, in some ways, is somewhat like the inside of a modern shopping mall in layout, though also has features of a boarding house (though more expansive). I am not sure of my place in this gated society. I walk around the environment without incident for a time. Assuming the orientation is relative to my present home’s (though there is no technical reason why it should be) it is longer from west to east and with a wide hall (west assumed to be the front though I am not outside of that area).

      There seems to be the memory of a girl in my care. She is eleven years old and with dark hair and green eyes and is seemingly a young version of my wife (even though I seem more of a step father here). I become aware of this when she is ready to leave in a car (on the east end) to go to a party with several other people. This seems to be some sort of party representing finality of something (such as the last day of a school year). She is wearing an elaborate light blue gown. There are at least two well-known celebrities in the car who I think are female pop stars though there are males as well. I have concern for her safety and tell her to get out of the car and to come back into the castle. This concern is based on awareness of mainstream pop culture (and my total dislike of it) and “knowing” that drugs or alcohol may be freely available at the other location (though later, the location actually seems to be another part of the same castle - unless they visited elsewhere before coming to a different area of the castle to party).

      At first she seems slightly confused and a bit annoyed, but becomes more “stable” as well as passive in my decision. From here, I go around “telling people off” about their attempt to destroy the child’s soul and natural (or instinctive) self-governance regarding right and wrong (also relative to possibly latent divine abilities such as healing and precognition). Although I take full control at this point, I am not lucid in any way.

      One of the people I “tell off” about the event seems to be her birth mother (though I do not recognize her - though I do say her name which I have forgotten, though I think it may be Gretchen), who is being kept in a holding cell (unsure of the crime she is there for) that is not that secure and with at least three other females around her age lounging about on the floor. It is very similar to a low-fenced rectangular area where people pay a small fee to feed smaller animals during some expos and it is out from the middle of one wall in a much larger room. A bit of hay is on the floor for bedding. She seems angry that I have done this but I am not impressed at all by her supposed reasoning which seems shared by many - “fun at all costs” and subjecting oneself to endless passive entertainment like a slow death. I ask her if she is okay and she makes a remark about two male drunks having disturbed her sleep the previous evening by yelling randomly around 3 am when walking down the street (from the southeast). It does not concern me as they were not a threat to the security of the castle (or gated city) at any point.

      Over time, I begin to single out and eliminate the people associated with pop culture or erroneous beliefs (not through any type of violence but by spurring the castle’s seemingly ruling “public” into proper action and the removal of the offenders). A few people deny the charges and hide in their quarters for the duration but I know they will be gone soon, which means all undesirable music of particular defeatist phrasing types will no longer be extant in the entire region.

      In a northeast section of the castle I use some sort of advanced testing equipment in the location where the party had taken place. It is some sort of powder with fluid-like properties (depending on what it falls on) made up of nanomachines. When most of the target is covered it creates a virtual monitor on all the surfaces with a report of the findings (down to the molecular structure). I try it on the stove they were to use at the party and all the sides then have many flashing instances of the word “warning” in red, white, and black; equidistant columns and rows by about three inches or so over the appliance. There is also a sort of buzzing alarm-like sound from somewhere (apparently a temporary virtual speaker formed by the nanomachines). The warning relates to both an illicit drug having been in contact with the oven as well as a poisonous chemical (associated with oven cleaner). This is only some of the evidence I will be gathering to oust all those I do not favor. I will be able to go over the whole castle and “recreate” it accordingly. “Invisible” (microscopic) nanomachines that clean or refurbish features of the in-dream environment (only the man-made ones) have been occurring more and more in my dreams since the beginning of the year. However, they serve a very similar function of where in-dream “magic” or mental focus have been used in the past.

      Near the ending, the girl thanks me for my interest in her survival and development and speaks and acts with sincere and devoting mien and is now solely a faithful obsequious ally, it seems.

      I am also considering if this is a “healing power” to “healing powder” transference (concerning ambiguity of my dream self’s faux memory) in recent dream trends due to liminal accidental “dream universe rewiring” in long-term meditation (due to the audio similarity of “power” and “powder” - as the nanomachines maintain a powder form with additional fluid or mist properties for the most part).

      Aspects of this very loosely seem influenced by episode #01.03 and #01.04 of “Survivors” (2010), seen the night before. However, this general theme has been recurring since earliest memory in various ways.

      Updated 12-12-2015 at 09:47 AM by 1390

      Categories
      memorable
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