CasperKid

Last night was filled with dreams, but I had really bad recall. It's interesting how this process seems to go in cycles and phases. This is the only dream that really stood out.

Dream 1-- Ali G. Interview

Walking into my sister's room, I see her on a mattress that has a white sheet covering it and is directly on the floor. Her room doesn't seem abnormal, but the layout is totally different. The mattress is set up directly in front of a T.V. that is the same one she actually has in her room. On the mattress it looks like she is talking into the T.V., and I walk over and lay on the mattress. The next sequence of events is rather blurry in my mind and I don't know if this is the definite chronology, but.. I look up at the T.V. and see that we can see ourselves in the screen. I don't go PassObs, which is a first, but I start getting excited how we are on camera.

My mind starts to wander at this point and I think about Ali G. for some reason. In my head, I see him on a catwalk with a bowl cut and a little mustache. He is wearing an all black shiny leather jacket with a zipper down the middle and the same color pants. He is walking straight, then turns to the audience and then continues to walk. I am kind of in awe of him because he can change his style so many times but people know who he is (or at least they know his fame). He can do whatever he wants and not be considered weird.

Then, somehow the whole mattress, T.V. and sister set up have switched over to my room, but every piece of furniture in my room is gone except for the mattress and a chair. Ali G. walks through the door as we are expecting to interview him for the show. I notice that he has the same obscure hairstyle as before, and also take note of the fact that it's 10 minutes before the start of the interview. I decide that I have time to talk to him a little bit and see what he is like.

He walks over and sits down on the chair. I say Hello Ali G. and he says hi. There is some conversation I can't remember, but then I say "I think Ali G. is the funniest movie ever." He isn't even looking at me when I say this comment, but when I utter it I see his eyebrows furrow in some sort of anger or disappointment, and I get completely PassObs. I feel like I just lied for no reason because I really didn't think that Ali G was the funniest of his movies, I was just saying it for some random reason. At this, I totally freeze up and start to regret that we are about to be on camera with him.

At the start of the interview, however, my sister does this slow motion punching combo with exaggerated sounds effects where she uppercuts me twice and then hits me in the face. I take this as a sign that she doesn't want me to be in the interview anymore so I act like the fake punches has killed me by exaggerating my reaction to them. Then I just lay on the ground beside the mattress until the interview is over. I go into PassObs thinking about how I fucked up and whether I should get up and whether my sister actually punched me like she did intentionally so that I would not be a part of the interview. I can't figure out these problems.

When I get up from this, it's night time and I am standing outside her room. We are talking about going to dinner but I am acting very distant, not looking at her and saying that I think I will stay in the house.


This dream, to me, suggests a lot of things about my personality. First, I like to exaggerate the importance of other people and downplay my own self-worth. Ali G. could potentially represent any person because I believe them all to be celebrities without any imperfections and with a much cooler life than me. I try to talk to them by lying and complimenting them on things that I don't genuinely believe to be true so they will like me, but this ingenuity, as my dream points out, actually pushes people away from me. What's worse is that I can discern my own deceit and then become obsessive about it, as if it's some sort of morality play and I just committed the greatest sin of the modern era. Now that I think I'm worthless, my sister aids in that feeling by fake punching me in a way that suggests to me that she wants me not to be a part of the interview. Because of my shitty feelings, I accept my own interpretation of not being good enough, take the blows willingly and even knock myself out so that I don't have to be a part of the interview. In this scenario, even if I had messed up socially, why would I miss the opportunity to interview Ali G just because I said something wrong and my sister didn't want me to? I think this dream, like many others, are showing me how I'm potentially controlled by the desires of other people when I mentally believe I am worthless. Why would I follow my gut if it leads me down the wrong path...? At least that's the logic of this inferior me.

Many of my dreams seem to be sending much stronger messages to me now either because I'm being more receptive or because I'm reading this book on symbols in dreams and archetypes. Either way, I'm really happy that I'm getting this information, but something I need to work on is implementing the advice of my subconscious and paying attention to when these things occur in the present!