• Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views




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    1. ccxxxi. A town fair

      by , 02-22-2021 at 01:57 PM
      22nd February 2021

      Dream:

      I'm in a hotel or apartment building. I'm on a floor above ground level but don't know which; I am walking towards a lobby-looking hall, with elevators and I want to go to the ground floor. There's this group of four black guys in their late teens, they seem to be shadowing me but I don't let it bother me even though they look like they could easily be trouble if they wanted to.

      I let them know I've seen them by looking at one of them in the eye, through a mirror showing us all. The mirror is between the elevator doors. None of us speak, that I can recall and they're just doing their own thing behind me at any rate, some kind of non-verbal communication.

      (recall gap)

      I'm outside, in the streets of a town. It's night time? I have awareness of Covid, but I'm not wearing a mask. It bothers me, but for some reason I make no effort to find one. Throughout most of the dream onwards this bothers me a bit on some level.

      At some point I meet up with M, whom I haven't seen in years in waking life. I remember he has a car? Like an SUV or something. There's something about my aunt B too.

      I walk around town, it's a bit like there's some kind of annual fair on. I am finding these little areas where there's some kind of more conventional role playing game involving furries in fursuits. But they look much more realistic, like they're actually their characters. One of them tells me they will actually pay me if I participate in the games wearing a fursuit myself. I think to myself I wouldn't mind, but I don't have one and would likely end up feeling embarrassed anyhow.

      (recall is vague for the following two paragraphs)

      At one point I'm climbing some stone stairs. It's sort of outdoors, but under some kind of natural rock formation? There's these two statues... I've seen them elsewhere in the dream. They look like they're flowing with some magical energy, it's a deep blue colour. The statues are damaged, incomplete. I remember thinking they're supposed to be in some museum somewhere, but this is actually their original location. This is a different place from the town? In Russia somewhere, I somehow understand. This is where they were first discovered.

      The statues are from ancient Greece, but from a more mythological period or something. They look like the lower bodies of some serpentine creatures, scaly. The heads are missing and one statue practically only has the very bottom of it left. I remember going past the statues while thinking about the whole thing, then I go up some more stone stairs. There's one of those role playing games again here, I forget what happens but it's some kind of murder mystery and I'm greeted by a furry who is dark and almost crawling at ground level, and he seems eager for me to take part in the game.

      Eventually I come across an attraction which takes place in a castle. I remember telling M I would try it out and that I'd let him know later all about it. You have to queue up for the attraction but initially there's just me and one other person.

      A heavy wooden door opens and allows us in. Inside, I immediately gain a HUD and there's some semblance to Legend of Zelda. I grab a knife, it looks toy-like and oversized somehow. I use it to attack some creatures. I then find a mace, in a similar style. My ally goes first through the next door. A stone armour golem tries to ambush him from behind but I hit it with the mace on the head, making enough noise my ally notices and doesn't get ambushed. We defeat the golem.

      We're now in a big room. It's church-like, cathedral-like, even. There's a Dark Souls feel to it. A boss is in the middle, we try fighting it but it deals a lot of damage.

      (memory intrusion?)

      Something about WoW, a group of players fighting a boss. One player is a monk tanking and rolling around and healing himself but not quickly enough.

      Then, we have eventually lost our battle with the boss in the church-like room. I am outside now and at the queue again? There's a lot more people here waiting this time. They're all younger than me and some look very impatient and like they'd be a bit rude.

      (recall gap)

      I'm on some castellated bit, across from the castle with the game attraction in it. There's other people here too, sat at rudimentary and makeshift artillery things that have a fantasy feel to them. I try one, but it's broken and does nothing. Sunset? I recall artillery from these guns going into the core of the other castle, I remember they were supposedly targetting the boss and providing support this way.

      I forget the rest but the dream ended soon after.



      Notes:
      - I feel the chronology of the dream is messed up versus what it actually was, but I didn't try to fix it.

      - There's something very personal to this dream about the dichotomy of me separating my life into separate organised areas of thought. Yesterday I had been thinking of consolidating some things.
    2. ccxxix. Homes

      by , 02-20-2021 at 01:07 PM
      18th February 2021

      Dream:

      In a version of our home and street. The van is outside and it was open in order for me to do something?

      Our street looks like it's part of some city like Paris, I don't know. To the right and beyond where there's that intersecting road, there are much taller buildings. I recall something about having to wait. Maybe I have a backpack. Our front door is open. At several points throughout the dream I alter the colours of our house, both interior and exterior. I remember we have some kind of small tiled mosaic floor. I eventually become satisfied with a sandy colour scheme with red accents.

      I remember I see a dream neighbour down the street. He's walking a dog or something and I'm concerned about it pooping near our door, but in reality they are too far for it to matter.

      I don't remember what kind of day it is, maybe sunny but light looks overcast. At some point while I'm waiting I get into a random car across the street, it's red maybe? When I get in I'm suddenly on a first floor level, but I don't realise or care about this in the dream. I think at one point I see a man from one of the windows (right side of the car, I was looking out left initially) and we talk.

      (recall gap)

      The next thing I remember, I'm in a car with two people. I'm on the front passenger side, which is on the right (though I don't realise this in the dream). One person is a man and the other I can't recall. We're in a very busy area of a city like L but bigger, wider roads. We're on a four or five lane road approaching a very complicated and busy intersection.

      Me and the man are having a conversation. We're discussing building a computer while the lights are still red. He's apparently from the past and is asking me about how hardware prices have changed and I presume he means over the last twenty years.

      In the dream, I think I feel I was in a further future time than in reality. I tell him, some things like USB and other small accessory stuff are a bit cheaper, but not much. Otherwise most other things remain more or less the same but with very good specs.

      The lights at this intersection become green and we start going. On the right there's a diagonally intersecting road we're merging with, it has just as many lanes and it's busy too and then there's an ambulance trying to come across from the opposite direction. I am quiet for now to let the driver concentrate, but once we are out of the complex situation, we resume discussion.

      Fragment:

      Bins and recycling are being collected. I forgot to put things out? And I try to do it then seeing as I still think they're about to collect it. But I don't see the collecting hi-vis people anymore by the time I get outside. Some other people are here, they are looking through bags. They tell me they are from some charity, they mention it by name. I forget what we talk about but I recall they were looking for clothes primarily.

      Notes:
      - Both sections of the longer dream relate to home in some way. Present home, past home and past-would-be home, I feel.
      - The apprehension about the neighbour walking the dog may stem from the fact that lately dogs seem to have taken a liking to our door for doing their needs.
      - Somewhat related, the part about re-decorating the house may
    3. ccxxvii.

      by , 02-15-2021 at 01:18 PM
      15th February 2021

      Thoughts:

      I woke up wanting to write down my dream recall, which was quite clear initially. Our alarms kept going off and this demotivated me a bit and I generally just felt a bit too sluggish to actually start writing my dream down; I hoped I'd remember some of it after getting up, but unfortunately not, perhaps because I got too distracted with other things, too soon.

      Just wanted to put this here as a memo to myself. Maybe next time I have such a clear recall I'll actually write it down, instead of not bothering.
      Categories
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    4. ccxxvi. Around town, cabinet climbing, crystal complex, basement meeting place

      by , 02-14-2021 at 03:40 PM
      14th February 2021

      Dream:

      (Long-ish. Recall broken up a bit.)

      Some bit in my home town. It seems dark but it's kind of day time, it's not just cloudy, because there's still colour saturation even in the dark. I walk around a corner of a modified version of where the primary school I went to is. There's something about this dream segment that has some consistency with previous dreams around this area. The buildings' height seems slightly exaggerated. The school itself has the main building in a different place, it's where the gate should be.

      There are some people I sort of bump into and talk with, I forget who. We are on the pavement by the main road that passes here, in front of the police station and where my cousin used to live.

      (Another bit, don't recall surroundings)

      There's some kind of wooden cabinet, not unlike the one we have here at home but smaller? Lighter wood stain. I'm trying to climb it. It has a hole of some sort on an inner side panel up top in the middle. Somehow, this is the entrance into a building. I've been there previously in the dream but recall is lost. The centres of mass in play mean that I can't balance myself properly to climb up.

      I remember I ask someone for help, someone I knew from school comes by, C?

      (gap)

      There's something about a vacuum and my eldest sibling. A car parking lot? Sort of hilly.

      Then, I'm in some kind of complex. It's got a high tech but magical feel. Purple and deep blue hues, with light blue highlights. Light seems neutral otherwise. Crystal walls or something. I am with other people, forget who, but one I think is a dream character and is guiding the way.

      Then a room with a crystal bridge or something. I think I cross it. Then I'm in a more normal looking basement. There are more people here, some possibly from my family. Some are just pure dream characters.

      (gap)

      I'm at a table in this basement with some other people, or perhaps I'm just a presence. A guy is having a happy conversation, with the air. And someone at the table starts to think this is odd. Then I see through his eyes and see he's talking to a ghostly woman.

      (rest of recall too vague to put into words)



      Notes:

      - Lately I've been playing a game where a character keeps seeing his dead girl-friend. That last bit from the dream seemed to be a related intrusion from that context.
      - The crystal place had a certain familiar feel, but I can't quite place it. On introspection, it only seems to be related to a general feeling of certain archetypical locations from several media (primarily animated films, games).
    5. ccxxv. Eyes

      by , 02-13-2021 at 11:52 AM
      13th February 2021

      Fragment:

      I'm talking to my mom. The shadows in my eyes are bothering me on some level and I possibly say something about it. She looks at me, alarmed, noticing and telling me that there are some kind of wisps growing out of the centre of my eyes. I cannot feel or see them, but feel they are related to the shadows.

      I remember talking to H and I ask him to help me call someone about it. I display some issue of confidence in trying to get this sorted out.

      Then I am at a mall place? Looks like the one from my home town. Feels small and cramped but only a few people are around. I am not wearing a mask and I'm here to try and find an optician. I ask one if they can see me and they tell me I'll have to see doctor (recall gone) and that I should try looking elsewhere or something. Just nearby there's a group of people about to go on some tour?

      A chunkier fellow notices I'm not wearing a mask and gives me an operating theatre looking type.

      Notes:

      - Even after waking, I've been left with this strange sensation in my eyes, even about half an hour later.
      - These shadows have been particularly bothersome lately, for at least a month or so, since they've been sitting mostly at the centre of my vision.
    6. ccxxiv. Notes, Discord, Village

      by , 02-12-2021 at 01:12 PM
      10th February 2021

      Notes:


      Haven't made much effort to recall, though initial recall was decent. Lately I've still been struggling to get up, but managed to get up at quarter past ten today.

      Dream vividness has been a bit lower I think, though I can't say with certainty, possibly because I haven't been taking Vitamin B so much after re-reading up on B6's half-life.

      Trying to not fall asleep again, my mind became distracted with random drawing ideas for my characters. Part of my issue at the moment seems to be I can't manage to feel compelled to record anything in the morning, possibly made worse by the fact I'm not getting up at what I'd consider a "good time". Partly sunny this morning.

      12th February 2021

      Fragments:

      Bit about Discord. V sends me a message about some video, but the video link isn't on the private message, it's on my server. I think I wonder why he did this.

      I check out the video; it shows what I in the dream assume to be his school, a high school? My presence enters the video. In a classroom, there's some kind of exercise about characters drawn on the chalkboard and they resemble Pokemon or something. Recall is too vague.

      Another bit, outside in a town or village with H. We're getting in our out of the van. I remember narrow pavement and cobbled roads as well as a certain hilliness; it has a feel of my native country. Something political but entirely fictional happens in this dream segment; recall details are gone.
    7. ccxxi. Questions about an old friend, Mayan spaceship, Wrong time of year

      by , 02-04-2021 at 01:57 PM
      4th February 2021

      Fragment:

      I'm with JC, we're walking together through an alternate version of my town. I remember asking him about his family's cafe or something, I ask if it was located near his house (I visualise it a bit) and I'm generally asking him questions about things I'm sure we've talked about in waking life, when we knew each other.

      Initially we had been at some kind of school or public building, leaving. We walk through the areas of town, which are much more open than usual, but the buildings seem proportionately expanded as well. We're headed somewhere specific, towards where my home is, but I forget the exact destination. I feel we're walking from the physically lowest part of town. It's day time but I think I remember a sunset at some point.

      Fragment:

      (Complicated dream, vague recall.)

      Something about being in some starships and some kind of ancient device on a planet. A wild grain field of sorts, that's where the device is located. I and four others come to it, and it requires five people in total to activate. It forms a sort of pentagon if it were viewed from above. It's comprised of five adjoining capsules of sorts. We get in them and they are like lifts, taking us down. We are then inside some starship of an ancient design, resembling ancient Mayan stylistically. It's a rectangular stepped pyramid with powerful thrusters, effectively. I remember it breaks through the crust and the thrusters smoke a lot, seemingly struggling a bit too.

      Fragment (FA):

      I'm in bed with H or something. It looks like my parents' old room but with a layout more like our bedroom. There's a unit with a seven-segment display across the room, it says 20:16? Eight PM, either way. I tell H that we'd stayed in bed far too long. H seems surprised but doesn't do much to get up? We're both naked, I think.

      I then remember being in our office room and thinking it's amazing that it was still day time at 20:16, more specifically at this time of year, but I do not question reality.

      (Recall mixed here.)

      On the computer, playing BL. Trying to find my way through some portals, with H, so we can get to KH. I end up on a dead-end player-owned location. It looks like a nice location, but I feel annoyed for wasting my time.



      Notes:
      - The false awakening was unusual. For one thing, I rarely have false awakenings at all. The dream presented some very obvious dream signs that I did not pick up on at all and I still managed to find myself in amazement.
      - Recall was overall poor because of having to get up to answer the door somewhat abruptly and then I returned to bed wanting to get up soon, but didn't, falling asleep again.
    8. ccxx. Eating a glass, Attacking a giant reptile, Buying gear, Cycle

      by , 01-31-2021 at 12:30 PM
      31st January 2021

      Fragment:

      I am in the kitchen. It's a day like it has been lately, kind of cloudy, a sort of desaturated natural light. Out of the kitchen's window it's not like how it should be, it's more like there's a driveway and there's a big van parked there but still it doesn't block much of the view or light somehow. There's a similar van parked over at next door's too.

      I open the cupboard where we keep the glasses? I grab and take out one of the blue ones, put my upper lips over the edge and sort of feel it melt a bit; the glass still feels rigid like glass but as I start biting into the top rim, it's a soft chew and there's something pleasurable about it. I get erotic thoughts somewhat unrelated to the glass itself but related to the sensations and M/M themes.

      Fragment:

      I'm with someone, perhaps T? We're riding on the back of a winged creature, flying high in a somewhat mountainous area. There's an MMO feel to things but it feels distinctly real too. I see us in third-person for the most part.

      Using a long gun-cannon thing, I am shooting at a somewhat generic 50ft reptilian below past some ridges and canyons; he is otherwise engaged in combat with other humans down there, in a semi-flat area. The shots I fire are highly explosive and I aim for vulnerable parts of the head, trying to "break" them, like if this was the game Monster Hunter.

      As I was about to break a part of the rear of the head, someone else does and I don't get credit it for it, and become annoyed. This happens once more on another part of the creature's head. I then aim for the eye instead and get credit this time, but at this point there's little left of the head apart from the lower jaw. He still lives somehow and is still in combat with the humans.

      (gap)

      I'm going through a mine-shaft like tunnel on the side of a ravine, parts of it are enclosed by rock, others are open to the outside. I am trying to go to a place that will let me head down, to an area like where the creature was.

      Fragment:

      Something about WoW. I'm in a large city and I have some kind of Honour points I can spend. The place reminds me of a mix of Dalaran, Exodar and Shattrath and it is flying in the sky as Dalaran would be. I come to a central hall of sorts, there are energy bridges and energy surfaces that I can walk on. I approach an NPC and see what PvP equipment I could buy with what little honour I have.

      Fragment:


      Something about being in Brazil or some other South American country. There's a distinct feel of advanced technology throughout the dream. High-tech structures and such like, though I don't remember seeing much of it. I am or was at some sort of resort or house away from everything, in a hilly and mountainous area overlooking a large river.

      I remember little of my own presence in the dream. The dream plot focuses on a serpentine creature, it is red and its scales are small relative to its size. It has been dormant for untold years and it wants to ruin all of the technology that has been brought about. The dream implies that it's not the first time this has happened and that it's part of a recurring cycle.

      The creature's size is comparable to the mountains in the area. I remember it could communicate telepathically or something.



      Notes:
      - The order is not chronological, the first fragment was the last I had this morning.
      - One of my right hand fingers is particularly sore because of an injury and I was unable to write any initial notes for any of these fragments because of it, bits of recall just remained and came back as I wrote.
      - The fragment in the kitchen is reminiscent of how I come to certain creative ideas sometimes, often through some physical sensations.
      - The day in the kitchen was remarkably like what it was like when I actually went in the kitchen for the first time today, though I think it looked less messy in the dream, more normal.
      - The red end-bringing serpent and the cycle seem to be a somewhat obvious but less literal Ourobouran reference.
    9. ccxviii. Loose dogs, Semi-lucid, Cameron at the dentist

      by , 01-27-2021 at 12:35 PM
      27th January 2021:

      Fragment:

      Night time. Some part in a house. Mom and her friend MJ? Something taking S out for a walk. (recall gap) At the house door, I'm in bare feet. S is outside and a bit "on the loose". She's three times her normal size, making her bigger than a lion. Her body shape seems elongated?

      From my position standing in the doorway, I see a German Shepherd approach with a man from the left and become concerned the dogs will fight. The GS first comes up to me and licks my face and generally wants attention. This part feels very vivid and real.

      Then the dogs spot each other and get fighty. I am reluctant to go out with bare feet to deal with this but S just comes up to the GS and I then try and hold her by her collar, though her size is making it difficult.

      (Think I woke up, it was early. I remember thinking I didn't want to bother writing notes yet and that I would try and simply recall the dream later. At this point I remember thinking about my switch in the way Occipitalred suggested. I remember the positions accurately and feel them mentally, toggling it a couple of times there.)

      Semi-Lucid Fragment:

      I'm outdoors somewhere? Night time still. I remember old school mates and friends. MB is here too. Me and my friends get into a sort of pretend game with real guns, fighting each other. I see an RPG launcher and grab it, everyone becomes afraid of me, except MB, kind of. I shoot a few rockets at him, they sort of just bounce off instead of exploding but they hurt him anyway. I try to really kill him, as I remember on some level what he represents.

      Later I'm in some kind of office-like place with H and I remember we had been having fun and I'm naked and have fluids on me. But as I'm walking somewhere to get myself clean in the dark, I become semi-lucid. I simply know I'm dreaming and realise I don't need to do any such thing such as cleaning myself. I try to will the mess away but it doesn't happen and I conclude it doesn't matter. I step over on to desks and over cubicle separators and despite the darkness I feel I can move around easily. I feel a level of energy that I have rarely known in waking life, and notice no pain. But lucidity eventually fades.

      (Recall is poor, I think because after this I continued dreaming and being asleep and the level of awareness dropped. I think this was kind of a WBTB but somewhat delayed. This dream felt like it was the start of being asleep again, anyway. My level of awareness and overall lucidity was somewhat poor.)

      Fragment:


      Something about a challenge involving putting on the one ring? Not sure if this was a dream or a thought while awake at some point. No clear visuals.

      Dream:

      A dentist's office of sorts, but seems built into a larger hospital. Doctor Cameron from "House" is here and she's here for an appointment. The dentist is a female of similar age and build, different hair and face.

      They are discussing some sort of serious treatment option. Cameron has forgotten part of what had happened last time she was on the chair. The dentist then suggests letting Cameron hear the audio log.

      Cameron is definitely distraught about what happened and the fact that she can't remember it at all. The dentist says that she can hear the tape when they both go over to Cameron's friends' place, which is implied by context of tapes and something else that it will be mine/H's place. Cameron tells her that she's gay and implies she'd like to hook up with her before coming over to our place or something.
    10. ccxvii. Daikatana marshes, Art anxieties, Nobody wearing a mask

      by , 01-26-2021 at 08:03 PM
      25th January 2021

      Fragment:

      Something Daikatana-like? I visit several dream locations but a few of those are marshes like in the first act of the game.

      I remember going into a disused entrance. Dark, wet. Some blue light or reflection from the water. Vines and so on? I'm here to find a body and destroy it, a friend or ally's body. Someone else is either with me, or guided me here.

      26th January 2021


      Dream:

      I'm browsing the usual art site. I'm looking at someone's profile and see that I'm on some list of skilled artists this person likes, I think I am surprised by this, but appreciative.

      Later, I return to the same profile? I see I am no longer on that list and spot an entry talking about the reasoning behind including each artist under a specific category. I'm listed apparently because of some KH (from BL) piece I made. They also mention how and why they chose to exclude me from their favoured artists' list, but I forget the details.

      There's an animation on this entry... It's their main character, a dark-blue, almost black furred wolf/canine. The animation loops and the character grins as he cuts off the ring finger from his right hand.

      I feel disappointed, or hurt.

      Dream:

      I'm outside, a typical city of some kind. I'm not wearing a mask and feel that I should be. I'm at a sports area and there are dozens of people of all ages, including young kids, though I think mainly kids. I become concerned because none of these people doing sports or playing outdoor games are wearing any masks. It makes me apprehensive and I almost feel as though I can see the particulates of their normal breathing in the air.

      I leave this area. I remember some roads. It's day time but I forget what the sky is like exactly. I'm walking through some street under an overpass. Someone is walking along with me but I forget who. We are having a conversation and we pass several people, some don't make any effort to move out of our way even though we are practically up against a wall on the side anyway. I feel apprehensive again about transmission.

      I can't recall where we go or end up.



      Notes:
      - Maybe it's only natural that I've been getting these dreams about the art browsing again. Lately I have been a bit more active and have felt the same anxieties and maybe frustrations that I was feeling around the last times I was having this sort of dream.
      -- I think I felt so hurt because I feel people are so changeable and I have been finding it very difficult to connect with anyone in that world. Too often I end up feeling just too different despite having virtually similar interests.

      - The outdoor dream had a grey or desaturated feel to it.

      Updated 01-26-2021 at 08:09 PM by 95293

      Categories
      non-lucid , dream fragment , side notes
    11. ccxvi. Tantrum and health issues, Writing a story, Art site, Octopus Woman

      by , 01-24-2021 at 06:42 PM
      24th January 2021

      Fragment:

      (at the end of a long segment about family)

      Uncle M mentions "Bucaccus"; it is apparently some kind of organ, gland or hormone? He apparently had many issues with it when he was my age and suggested I get it looked at. I remember previously in the dream I had been having some kind of tantrum, throwing things. I apologised to my uncle and someone else there, an old woman?

      Fragment:

      Waiting for a train in a subway station. I'm wearing one of those new and modern drawing gloves on my right hand. I'm writing some kind of story on the palm of that glove on my right hand. I don't make notice of the fact that I was using my left hand to do so.

      The train eventually arrives and I get in; then when I get out somewhere else, I find that my little story has rubbed off completely and is gone and I try to remember what I had written.

      Fragment:

      Looking at some profiles on an art site. One of these profiles has thirteen thousand people who are basically subscribed to it. Part of the page seems odd and the dominant layout colour is incorrect to what it should be in waking life, it's a deep blue in the dream.

      As I scroll down I find extra sections, like multiple featured text posts with commenting areas of their own. There's also some section labelled "high-profile banned/blacklisted users". I look through this section, which only has a dozen of usernames, and find that some usernames start similar to mine but mine isn't on the list, I feel some sort of relief?

      This person's profile has a lot of issues with spamming?

      Fragment:

      I'm in my old home, my room. I'm visiting. I am upset for some reason? And then there's some kind of hybrid species woman; she's part octopus and she's sad for some reason. Her mom is here too and has the same features, but her mom has a blue tinge and she has a pink-ish tinge.

      In any case, I try to comfort her, but she is resistant to any comfort I try to offer. I remember at one point we touch one another a bit, half sensually, half not, like a strange dance? I am curious about the tentacles and she lets me touch them. This implies some trust on her part, I feel.

      The suckers nip on my skin but much less harshly than I expected; I feel that she has control over this and has made it so as to not hurt me.

      Her mother says something about how she could just cut off her tentacles if she's that sad (comes across as half-serious/half-sarcastic) and that they'll grow back. Her mother warns her however, that it will take months to regrow them and that during sleep she'll be waking up to what feels like every five minutes and bleeding or something.

      I tell her that she should do no such thing. I feel the mother's suggestion was too serious and that it would cause so much more damage than good.



      Notes:

      - The last fragment feels strangely ironic considering how I am feeling right now about something.
      - The tentacles had ends that were more squid-like than octopus-like, come to think of it.
      - I think it's been a while now since I dreamt of any subways or trains. It had also been a while since I dreamt about a website, specifically an art one.
    12. ccxv. Trippy dream and conflict at the old home

      by , 01-24-2021 at 01:40 PM
      23rd January 2021

      Multiple sequences from one dream:

      Very trippy bit just before waking up.

      Before that, I am at a building. A utilities company or office building. I am waiting to be seen or talk to someone. There had been a mistake of some kind on a bill, so I got 60 off as a voucher, but the company was cheeky and raised the price anyway in the end, resulting in only 10 off in total.

      In a larger room, with open plan connections and several large windows, I speak to a woman at a desk. I basically ask her if I can't speak to someone here about retentions; I want to get a better deal. She says no.

      There's a spray bottle on a table, it has a transparent green-blue liquid and the label has a number on it? I start typing it on my phone's dialler, it takes me a while, it's a long number? Things start to get trippy at this point.

      For each set of three numbers, there's something that looks like skin showing up on my phone? This image, which is more real than just image, pans from side to side as I go through each set.

      An eye appears in each equivalent bit for each set I complete.

      (recall starts becoming vague, two separate sequences blending)

      Final bit of some sequence, I'm inside a mouth with multiple openings, about seven I think. There's enough standing room and a bit of headroom but not much. The multiple openings open and shut periodically, I think. Sunlight comes through, there's a beautiful blue sky outside. I'm adding missing features to the mouth, like teeth and I reach or am outside to add some sort of ceramic scales to the outer part. It's all a bit jumbled, can only say it was a bit too trippy to recall accurately.

      Mixing. I'm going to Romania by someone's request. He was organising some kind of "save the world" thing? I remember going about with a group of people, night time but bright?

      (recall gap)

      Using a double barrel shotgun of some kind, it doesn't feel as good to use as I'd hoped. It has a locked firing mode that fires each barrel in sequence with a set delay if I press the trigger once. I expected it to fire one of the two barrels only per trigger press. I fight some soldiers with berets. Something reminds me or looks like Promethea.

      At one point I remember being in a bedroom of some sort. Open sky, no ceiling and not all walls are here. I feel I am stealing or intruding, but it doesn't stop me. I find a box full of mini-discs and floppy disks.

      Dream:

      (from falling asleep again in the morning)

      At one point I'm in my native country. I'm with old schoolmates, like JC, R and some others. It's a very hilly town we're in. There are loads of people about, there's some kind of event going on?

      Then, I find myself in a shop, deviating from where the group was going, I remember expecting I'd be able to catch up. Some kind of real-time advert is taking place here and it's for olive oil of all things. It almost feels Japanese, the advert. But the olive oil and the general look of the shop make me realise and conclude that I must be in my native country. Pre-lucid thoughts.

      I see coins in the register being handled, they are not Euros, but they are instead an altered version of the currency my native country had prior to the Euro. I don't question things further despite finding this odd, accepting the context even with some lingering amazement at all this.

      More walking around the hilly town. Eventually, I'm inside a big building. A theatre or a mix of one and a church or something. Someone mentions pipe organs. I think to myself that if I was wealthy I would buy some to make a car's adornments with.

      I climb some stairs, I'm with someone up in a gallery. We're talking to another person, but they don't feel like a person? Looks like an old man though. He's some kind of curator and he mentions manipulating pupils (like university students). Me and the other person conspire with eye glances to each other that we're about to kill this old man, who we find to be immoral and tyrannical. When he turns over and is facing a part that has no railing, we both strike him with a large object at the same time, like chairs maybe.

      The old man falls down, one or two stories. We presume him dead and see some witnesses downstairs are approaching to look and we go down via the stairs. We approach the supposed corpse; he still lives and surprises us with an attack and we become locked in a battle with the old man. The dream becomes a bit supernatural or trippy.

      The fight follows down a hall that turns into a desert canyon, just before the dream ends.
    13. ccxiv. The dark pyramid and a strange town

      by , 01-22-2021 at 11:42 AM
      21st January 2021

      Dream:

      (not the earliest point I can recall in the dream)

      I'm in a dark and sooty room at the apex of a pyramid. I don't remember seeing the outside, I just have this knowledge intuitively. There's also a bottomless square pit. The soot is dark brown and seems to have an increased build up the further up it is on the inner apex. I don't know how I'm able to see, there's no light source but things look just bright enough.

      There's some kind of machine near the middle of the room. By the looks of it, it should be fixed down to the ground but it isn't. It has a main moving part, a piston or pushrod of some kind. It jerks around out of control indefinitely. I think something but the recall is gone.

      The scene changes a bit and a white lady with light curly hair appears? She starts speaking like she's in a documentary, she mentions the machine but then there is a focus on a puppy that appears in the room. The puppy is an integral part of the room, I feel or she explains, and an integral part of whatever purpose the machine is supposed to serve.

      She explains that someone has to come and feed the puppy every day, but that otherwise it must always remain her. I touch the dog, it's a gold labrador at first? I say something aloud about it being unfair for the dog, or something.

      (recall gap)

      In a Japanese town, but it just looks like any town in Britain or the USA, it has more "room" like the latter. I think to myself it's odd that it's a Japanese town. All the people I see around are distant from me and I can't tell what their ethnicity actually is, making me suspect it's not really a Japanese town. But I don't investigate my suspicions further, some kind of dream plot drags me around the town; I'm being chased, or someone else is, and I'm following.

      A man, he was being chased. We arrive at a house that's also a restaurant or inn. A pub, effectively? There's a flagpole outside on the garden, I notice the ground is covered in snow. For some reason I fear this man is going to defecate on his own snowy lawn. He doesn't. The flag flying on that pole is one like that for India, I notice. Three horizontal stripes, top to bottom; green, white, red or orange. With a stylised black sun in the middle.

      The man invites me inside. Seemingly the chase is up.

      (recall gap)

      I'm shown some kind of machine. H is with me. The man leaves for a while; he said he'd like us to fix this machine for him. It looks like it's bare, i.e. no aesthetic coverings, etc.

      It has some kind of plastic platters. Looks like many random bits off CD players, tape machines, etc. But the size of the parts is different from what it would be in those machines. H tries to adjust something and the large top platters ping off towards the back left side. We are annoyed, but conclude it probably helps us anyway.

      (rest of recall is too vague)



      Notes:

      - The machine at the pyramid's apex looked like it was some random thing cobbled together from different bits of wood and maybe some metal. It looked very crude and it was equally crude in behaviour.

      - This pyramid's apex felt almost like the mix between a loft and the inside of a regularly used chimney.
      -- The room and its contents felt like they had some strong symbolic associations. Could be an interesting place to try doing some dreamwork.

      - When I questioned the town's Japanese-ness, my awareness of the dream overall increased but I was instinctively taken by the dream plot before I could really think about it further. I realise now I could have thought about it further while running but I didn't.
    14. ccxii. Pre-sleep encounter with Data at the Dream Bridge

      by , 01-17-2021 at 11:59 AM
      17th January 2021

      In bed, at about 3 AM whilst trying to fall asleep. During the whole thing I noticed my heart rate was higher than it would normally be at rest. Dialogue as close to original as I can recall and notes are in-line and unbracketed.


      Not a dream and conscious with my eyes closed:


      I start to think about wanting to be lucid and then wanting to look for the black lizard.

      I hear the voice of Data and find myself seeing I'm on the bridge of the Enterprise, the one that's his contemporary. It's a bit clear at first visually. I have encountered Data other times in my head recently. For some reason he seems to encourage my conscious control and mastery of the sub-conscious and wishes to serve me.

      Data: "Hello, may I call you captain?"

      Me: "Hello. Yes, you may."

      Data: "Will you accompany me to the turbolift sir?"

      Me: "Yes, why?"

      I find my own voice comes out naturally as if it was Picard's; I eventually try to alter this but with little success. Whenever Data speaks, half of it feels like it's being controlled by me, resulting in strange dialogue, but otherwise it feels detached from my ego.

      Data: "I'd like to show you to the bridge; the battle bridge; no, the dream bridge."

      Me: "The dream bridge?"

      The visuals are muddy and too much like as seen in the show for my liking and I try to taste the walls, I try to feel where I'm walking and touching the railings and so on. It doesn't improve the visuals, but there is a feel of being in the place. We get on the turbolift and then find ourselves on a similar version of the bridge we were just in but it has a different feel. I see the large screen and the unmanned bridge.

      Data: "Yes sir. The dream bridge will allow you dream control if you so desire."

      Me: "How does it work?"

      Data: "It allows you to scroll; view, pre-view, select, choose and so on. As in your childhood sir, it works the same way."

      I understand what Data is referring to as being my pre-sleep lucid experiences from when I was much younger but this is somewhat different, more elaborate. I have an intuitive feel of how it's going to work but don't fully understand and the unclear visuals make it difficult to manipulate anything. I sit on a version of the captain's chair on this bridge. I feel the chair, just. There is some kind of controllable trackball I instinctively conjure on the right arm of the chair. I try to use and feel it for scrolling.

      Me: "If I have any further questions, I will call on you, that will do for now. Goodbye Mr. Data."

      Data says goodbye politely and I lose awareness of his presence as if he is completely gone. I try and use what's available to try to look through potential dreams. It doesn't work very well or as I expect. But one scene does pre-view better on the large screen, a M/M themed scene that plays itself out. But from there I don't know how to progress. I try to visualise more but it doesn't really work and visuals in general remained poor or unclear.

      The rest of the dialogue recall is too vague now, and I recall calling out to Data a couple of times and he would appear every single time I called him, and disappear whenever we said goodbye to each other. The computer would talk to me as well if I started a sentence by saying "Computer," but for the most part it was useless, probably because of how in the show I perceive the ship's computer as having no intelligence, a feature that Data, even as a character in my head, exhibits very well.

      I have found the experience to be somewhat odd; although a lizard character has tried to (aggressively) promote my ego's control and confidence, Data as a character is seemingly trying to promote control and mastery but in a very loose and passive way, allowing me to explore at my own pace for the most part and actively trying to teach me things. I think what has surprised me is the fact that these characters are not at the ego level but they are promoting it and basically siding with the ego.

      Data seemingly has loyalty for me as he would indeed for the captain on the Enterprise. For a couple of nights now I have thought about trying to remember what those pre-sleep experiences from my childhood felt like, so this whole thing has felt like a following of that and the theme may be because we've been watching the show again, although this was unexpected.

      The rest of the recall is lost but I was awake for a while longer after this.
    15. ccviii. School stuff and a brief rampage

      by , 01-11-2021 at 05:31 PM
      11th January 2021

      Dream:

      At a school. For whatever reason, it has headstones on its gardens like a church yard would. I'm in a classroom initially, banal stuff happens. Not sure what the class/lecture is. Feels like school from when I was between age 10-15.

      Eventually, a second teacher comes in. A black woman, she smiles a lot and seems friendly. She sits next to me on my left at my desk. I notice she has extremely short hair, not unlike my own haircut in waking life right now but her hair is curly. Her skin tone itself is very dark but not the darkest I've ever seen.

      She smiles and we talk about some forms I was supposed to have filled. It was some kind of evaluation or assessment, I remember doing bits of it beforehand. There's this page with a table layout and she asks if we should go from there. She's sort of... half on a phone line with someone at the same time? That other person can hear our conversation but I don't remember hearing them.

      At some point, I notice we're outside, still sitting at the same desk. As we're going through the page, because of the way she explains some things, it becomes obvious to me that what little I'd done was not fully correct and my assumptions about the column headers were erroneous.

      I have some vague recall that it was an assessment about my physical symptoms.

      It's kind of a perfect day; sunny outside with a very light amount of distant clouds. I feel or notice the tufty grass under where we're sitting.

      She gets another call, or someone comes? and tells her that she's going to be suspended from work. Apparently, she forgot (and I didn't know) that we were violating the rights of the dead, by blocking the space between them and the sky. She's not phased by this and smiles politely but genuinely. This other party berates me and tells me I'll be failing this class. I feel sad and start sobbing.

      The black lady leads and accompanies me into one of the school halls. Dark and unlit, except for a reflecting glow from outside.

      I ask her, in my native language and in anger and crying, "why is there such a stupid rule?". I feel frustrated and say whatever else comes to mind, and I say "it's a pointless rule!" as I walk toward a window. From a first-floor (we were on a ground floor a moment ago but I didn't notice this) window I see the tightly packed headstones and ask "why the hell does a school even have graves on its grounds?!" and I think I walk back to her and we walk together a little bit.

      She's about to say something and I try to stop sobbing and I say "I'm sorry, I know it's not your fault" and I feel that the suspension she's getting is completely unfair. She smiles again and tells me something, also talking about her suspension though before she can manage to comfort me I feel myself running away, still angry and confused at everything that had just happened.

      I'm not on the school grounds anymore and I'm running angrily and aimlessly through a city street wide enough for six cars. Three buses following behind each other are coming my way, slowly, but I make no effort to avoid them at first. I think about how I could die crushed by one and nobody would care, but before I get too close, I preserve myself and avoid getting trapped or run over but in a blind anger I swing my arms at them, trying to hit the back plating. I continue running down the street in my emotional state with some awareness of people around looking at me a little.

      The street slopes downwards and is in the shade of a large and tall building to the left. As the street continues down it has an edge and beyond that in the distance I see the rest of this massive city lit by sunlight, on a sort of cylindrical slope or half-tube. It's an amazing cityscape but I don't even make an effort to appreciate this during the dream.

      (later, or after waking up and falling asleep again while thinking about how I would like to be lucid and would like to anger an Olympian god)

      I'm in a dark house. There's a door leading to a basement with vehicles and I want to take a bomber jet. Mom is in this first room and tells me that dad took something out for a ride but as I approach the door he comes through it and lets me know that I can't use what I was wanting to, just right now. I seemingly don't care too much and go through anyway and get on a "mini" battleship, no bigger than a small van.

      I take it out and immediately I'm in some kind of combat adventure. There are bad guy lackeys trying to shoot at me but they do so in vain and even though "miniature" this battleship moves a ton of water; I'm going down some kind of tropical river. Going down some rapids I think about taking out some more distant targets and then I open a realistic-view interactive map of a nearby area and decide I want to teleport there, trying to pick a precise spot and imagining the best spot to make the battleship drop on to displace a lot of water when it reappears and falls in. But when I actually do teleport, I'm not in the battleship anymore.

      I'm now some kind of gorilla; some remnant of the anger from the earlier dream returns, in some way. I go down an area full of people and cars and I attack them but only in passing; I seem to be focusing on simple continuing along and just damaging whatever's within reach along the way. At one point near the end, a panicked man in his car pointlessly tries to run me over. I'm about the same size as the car but easily avoid it and then proceed to chase after him for a while before I lose interest and continue my aimless rampage. This bit takes place near a fast food car park.



      Notes:

      - This dream was completely non-lucid and at no points did my awareness really raise any higher; there were no pre-lucid thoughts or feelings. It was very vivid overall and all emotions were quite intense, but none of the intensity carried over on waking.

      - I took an extra supplement before bed last night.

      - That woman was such a nice person and after writing my initial notes for the dream it really reminded me of how lucky I was through school at times, having had figures like her present not just once but many times.
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