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    Nightmares

    1. Afraid of the World

      by , 02-27-2022 at 04:59 PM (The Internal and Subconscious World of DropTherapy)
      I had a dream earlier this morning where my mom's physical condition became progressively worse and it made me anxious about if it's even possible to live independently anymore. After I woke up, Aaron mentioned we could move to the Netherlands if push comes to shove but I'd miss my friends
    2. Ruining Everything

      by , 02-19-2022 at 04:52 PM (The Internal and Subconscious World of DropTherapy)
      I remember that the dream involved me playing roblox harmlessly at first, however things quickly took a dark turn when I went to see four of my friends, one of which is one I have in real life.

      For no particular reason, I started doing unspeakable things to them, depriving each of them of one of their five senses. One of them lost their hearing because I jammed a knife so far into their ear canal that I punctured the ear drum, one of them lost the ability to speak, and one of them was both deaf, blind, and mute, and possibly incapable of feeling anything. Another one was locked in a shower. For whatever reason, none of them reacted to any of this, and one of them seemed to almost enjoy it. After all was said and done, I kinda just left them there in the bathroom that this had been done in. My friend Ren was horrified by what I did and publicly called out not me but the action of what I did. No one else cared, but I felt guilty the entire time regardless. I remember going on an episode of either the Simpsons, Malcolm in the middle, or both to confess to my crimes, but I couldn't talk about it because they were only interested in things that would make them money, so hal talked with an interviewer in a kitchen about the time one of his kids did something stupid. Regardless, the whole ordeal was an experience of handling guilt. A few of the locations I was in included inside a giant hardware store-ish thing, outside a shopping center, in a bathroom, and on a TV set.

      One of the people I desecrated looked like max, another like trinity, and another looked like a small electronica musician I saw live once. I feel horrible about all of this and would never wish harm on any of those people. One of them is a somewhat close friend, another one is extremely nice, and the musician seemed cool.

      The fact that this dream was had after I started feeling like school was falling apart isn't a coincidence. I'm glad I have Aaron comforting me right now.
      Categories
      nightmare , non-lucid
    3. You are Lost

      by , 11-17-2021 at 02:35 PM (The Internal and Subconscious World of DropTherapy)
      I remember being in this sort of dream world where different passageways lead to different parts of the dream. In one faithful instance of stupidity, I found myself going through a tunnel with some people that lead to a relatively large, dark expanse and then coming out the other side alone. The setting I found myself in was a roller rink's food court/resting area, but minus the actual roller rink itself.

      I tried to leave, but as I went further into the entrance I came through, I felt like I was being impeded by a stronger version of the same pitch black material that my trailer's blinds are made of. It felt as if I was completely enveloped in it the harder I tried to power through it. Eventually, I decided to call upon the help of a tall, vaguely emaciated looking figure who must have been the god of this realm. He told me that in order to get through, I needed to maintain a state of absolute calm, and only then will the passageways to other parts of the dream be opened to me.

      I decided it was worth a shot. I walked in as far as I could, already missing whatever I was doing before I found myself in this predicament, laid down, took a few deep breaths, and suddenly I felt as if I was no longer being crushed like before. The first few attempts to leave were unsuccessful due to me losing my sense of calm and/or focus, but eventually I did make it to doorways that lead elsewhere.

      The problem, however, is that none of these were desirable locations. A lot of them featured nightmarish creatures and dead ends, causing me to have to make it back to the roller rink area. A lot of them featured an entity resembling a very short old african american lady with no arms, although its human appearance was only a fluke. In actuality, it was as far removed from any kind of humanity as possible, acting either as a cunning, highly manipulative predator or a mindlessly cannibalistic one.

      After what felt like at least an hour of searching, I made it to a small room with heavy green lighting and an old-fashioned wallpaper that featured vertical stripes and other decorative designs. The room itself was probably slightly larger than an average closet space, and across from me was a door that I presumed to at least lead to somewhere more feasible. The issue, however, was the presence right next to the door of an instance of the afforementioned creature and another, much larger and bulkier one that might have been wearing a tuxedo and had a face similar to the vaguely insmuth looking people from tool's music video for parabola. behind them was a chair and a few food bowls full of what looked like cat food.

      I thought that maybe I could dart past them and open the door, however I didn't consider the possibility of it being locked, and once they spotted me, they both attempted to attack/take bites out of me, to which I got angry and adrenaline-filled and knocked over the chair and food bowls, eventually causing me to wake up. I remember thinking to myself, "oh thank god finally".

      Updated 11-17-2021 at 02:52 PM by 89498

      Categories
      non-lucid , nightmare
    4. A Horrid Hotel

      by , 05-09-2021 at 08:27 AM (The Internal and Subconscious World of DropTherapy)
      I had a dream where me and mom were still homeless. Despite that, one thing that stayed close to reality is that I worked at her job with her. We were having an argument in front of the car about openness when I said that I feel like I can never be open about my opinion about her or other things and she got really mad, and then I pointed out angrily that this always happens, after which I was kicked out of her car, felt obliged to leave and we screamed at each other as I walked away flipping her off from behind with both hands. Before she even left, a couple of old, decrepit heroin junkies with needles in their arm and an asian guy with a robot started asking favors of me that I didn't feel were ideal for me to do. They wouldn't back off until a few straight moments of convincing them to leave, but this one creepy overweight asian guy with a robot was following me for a bit longer, after which he deployed a module of his robot that rolled around on the ground, presumably to watch me.

      I ran to the other side of the hotel where my room was and closed the door, but before I could close it entirely, the little glass diode robot rolled in, after which I stomped it down and crushed it. The room was similar to the main two star hotel we stayed in for most of the duration of our irl homelessness, but instead of puke green like the door, the walls were white, and the main bed was in the corner of the room across from the TV, which was a nice flatscreen one that actually worked, on the right side of the door. Some time before she left, my mom said that whatever was on the TV was probably unsettling, and it sort of was. I saw a very personable grayish blue crash test dummy get dunked forcefully into water while it passively and contently accepted its fate, among other things. I switched the channel and came across a music video for a song by Primus about someone convincing their dad to let them use heroin, with the "I know I'll get through to him someday" line standing out to me the most. It sounded like something off their 2011 album Green Naugahyde. The whole time this was playing, I knew that the door to my hotel room was so broken that a little outward force could open it, but I didn't know what to do about it until I saw that it wasn't the main door. The main door was covering up the window and was much thicker. I closed that and after a bit of relaxation after an entire evening of tenseness, I woke up.
      Categories
      nightmare
    5. Loss, Fear and a Distant Celebration

      by , 11-07-2020 at 07:03 AM (The Internal and Subconscious World of DropTherapy)
      I had a dream where I was at an apartment with my mom and I had to go outside to do something. There was also a celebration of some kind going on. I left when for some reason I decided to find a car to sit in for some reason. I sat on theo (ex boyfriend who I am on good terms with irl) on accident and noticed that Edynn was in the front seat and vicky from the fairly odd parents was there too. they told me to get out and that they didn't want anything to do with me anymore. Theo cited the fact that we were in a relationship and I didn't care as a reason. I couldn't articulate more than just screaming, specifically at edynn. I actually got so mad I tried scratching up her face, resulting in theo being harmed the most. I got out, told my mom about it, and she seemed more adamant about advertising that there was a two bedroom apartment we were gonna move into. I left and wandered around aimlessly for a while.
      Categories
      non-lucid , nightmare , memorable
    6. The Shoe People and Their Hatred

      by , 11-07-2020 at 07:01 AM (The Internal and Subconscious World of DropTherapy)
      I remember being in a hotel room and saw the notorious B.I.G there with me. I said something along the lines of "wow you really do come across as big". he took offense to it, thinking I was referring to his weight, I clarified that I meant in regards go his presence and energy and then he got really hyped and started knocking stuff over and then left. Cut to a school. I was there with all the friends and students I had talked to in school throughout the years. I had a diary and nicknames. I remember seriously upsetting Jasmine and then apologizing. We stayed in dorms that resembled one star hotel rooms with the same sickening green color as the two star hotel I am in as of writing this. Shawn, a friend I used to know from elementary through middle school, had run into a warehouse after breaking down and being insecure about his musical skills. I eventually went back home and talked to my mom and decided we had to do something over at a different part of the building. We drove there, at one point talking about conspiracy theories and how I personally didn't get them, especially how they apparently gave people the urge to defect to remote locations. We made it to the building and then immidiately noticed the structure of the school location was flipped. There was a lightswitch that my mom got fixated on at the end of a hallway at an upper floor of the building. I was trying to get her attention when I saw someone walking towards the stairs next to us on a lower level. I noticed that there was a shoe replacing this person's head, freaked out, said "mom, these people are made of feet, we gotta go" and noticed that her head had turned into a shoe as well. The shoe person below me noticed my presence and ran full speed towards me as my mom stood mindlessly facing the lightswitch. I was attacked and then I woke up.
      Categories
      memorable , non-lucid , nightmare
    7. Nobody Home

      by , 06-14-2020 at 08:05 AM (The Internal and Subconscious World of DropTherapy)
      It was late at night and my aunt left. That is unfortunately when I realized my mom was also gone and I had no one to take me to school. I then complained about this in a way that caused me to gain lucidity. I saw my aunt's van (very consistent, I know) and saw my rottweiler in there. I asked her to say something a few times and she made deep, guttural vocalizations that vaguely sounded like "Bree". I got in the car with her to watch videos when I heard a knocking at the door next to mine. It was my sister and she was getting my attention about a book, which appeared to be from the goosebumps series. I interpreted this as a threat and got out of the car with a lighter and backed away into the front yard where I attempted to set her on fire, although all it did was momentarily cause her pain with no visible signs of damage. The way I was doing this led us into the street where she managed to grab me by the neck and slowly morphed into a poorly passing trans woman with a sinister smile on her face, which is when I woke up
      Categories
      lucid , non-lucid , nightmare
    8. My Grandma Almost Kills Herself

      by , 10-19-2019 at 08:10 PM (The Internal and Subconscious World of DropTherapy)
      In this dream I was playing a game that had some form of AI in it. It tried to generate and ocean-based Zelda game but since it didn't know how to program NPCs there were just a bunch of dead mermaid Links at the bottom of the ocean. I then woke up and went to the kitchen. It was early in the morning (likely 5PM or before) and my grandma wasn't in a good emotional state. I hugged her for a little while, which resulted in her telling me that she was calling the cops. When I asked why, her only reply was "suicidal war rites". She grabbed a petri dish with remnants of some kind of brown substance while I was begging her not to kill herself. She was about to get something else from the cabinet where we put our cereal until she finally snapped and screamed at me to shut the fuck up.
      Categories
      nightmare , false awakening
    9. Thought Battles

      by , 07-09-2019 at 02:12 PM (The Internal and Subconscious World of DropTherapy)
      I was writing a script for a documentary about my life after leaving the band I'm in. I was suffering from something called "thought battles" which plagued me constantly. Essentially, it was just fancy terminology for me being too mentally active to do anything and that eventually leading to pretty bad short term memory loss. I put my notebook down and started wondering around my room for ~5 minutes. I then went downstairs to see if water could help. When I got to the kitchen, I saw a kitten no more than a week or two old pass me, and then I started crawling on the ground. From down the hallway I could hear me grandma talking to her self, saying that she was from a location in real life that she doesn't actually live in. (keep in mind this is at around midnight). She then spots me and shouts "Hey!" at me. I am paralyzed.
      Categories
      non-lucid , nightmare
    10. The Most Efficient Way to Delete the Universe

      by , 07-05-2019 at 04:04 PM (The Internal and Subconscious World of DropTherapy)
      I remember entering my room. On my computer there was an AI program that teaches itself to physically delete things. I turn it on with my peak nihilism in full swing and it starts.
      It starts as unrecognizable, but eventually I start seeing physical items be deleted, so I type !detention, and that pauses the program or at least makes it unable to operate. I unpause it and I get the most menacing "you" on my monitor screen possible, seeing as the list of items that are deleted goes up to the 12,000s. I try to type it again, but my keyboard was deleted, so I grab another one, but my struggles to plug it in were to no avail. All the while, pop punk/post hardcore-ish music was playing in the background.
      Categories
      non-lucid , nightmare
    11. Nightmare Compilation

      by , 06-30-2018 at 04:15 PM (The Internal and Subconscious World of DropTherapy)
      In the first part of this nightmare, my aunt and my mom went out to do something. After that, chaos ensued. I told Michael Rosen about the game Doom. As soon as we were playing the game together, he went nuts and tried to kill me. Next, I went into the TV room where my aunt and my uncle were watching TV. I went to my uncle and told him "I seem to be having trouble not having nightmares," while sitting behind him on the couch. He then became really sinister looking and tried to strangle me. I tried to push him back with limited success. I commented, "Wow, my cousin is much worse at this." After that, I was playing a game made by valve involving doge heads and collecting stuff that came out of a hole in the wall. I saved my spot as "doge(could be a nightmare)," and as soon as I began to go down the hallway outside of the room, I saw a demon lady with pitch black skin who was as tall as the door race towards me. It then cut to me going downstairs when I noticed my cat. I decided I had enough with any nightmare or anything that could start one, so I took my cat and bent her in half so that her head was next to her tail, broke her neck, and bit her. Why? I guess I was just that pissed off.
      Categories
      lucid , nightmare , memorable
    12. At W's House

      by , 02-07-2018 at 03:06 AM (The Internal and Subconscious World of DropTherapy)
      I was at lunch talking to W. I was showing her a video while everyone else was recking the place and while there was a consistent 4/4 drum beat consisting mostly of rides in the background. I guy from at least a yard away commented on it and then it cut to me being at W's house. The place was a mess and the floor was covered in clothes. I remember the floor was a navy blue color. Her room looked like a small compartment in an abandoned sanitarium, with the corners rotting and trash everywhere. There was also the closet to the left. The walls were yellowed with age or perhaps because of the lighting. She then asked me to assist with a large roll of scotch tape she was taping to her head. it looked like she was trying to replicate cornstalks with her brown and green hair. As soon as I grabbed the tape from her, it cut to real life, with a narrator keying in what was happening in the dream. Overlaying my vision was a wikipedia page of some kind, and I was in sleep paralysis on my side looking at my desk. All the while, I was tensed up and sweating with fear. The narrator said that, "What Mark saw that night he would never recover from." I then woke up, got dressed, and then ACTUALLY woke up.
      Categories
      non-lucid , nightmare , memorable
    13. The Strangest Episode of Ed, Edd, n' Eddy Ever

      by , 02-03-2018 at 02:18 AM (The Internal and Subconscious World of DropTherapy)
      I was in my Art class with a large encyclopedia, which I am assuming was at least 800 pages in size. I wasn't sure if any of the information was accurate, so I decided to go on the website of the encyclopedia. HORRIBLE MISTAKE. Upon being on the site, the whole screen went black and text showed up that said "this site is good" and a rapidly color changing ball bounced around the screen. There were also white lines that had a similarly colorful trail, as well as the whole screen changing hues. I couldn't close the site, not because of endless dialog boxes like in real life, but just because it didn't work. After that, the visuals cut to a music box, or at least a box with a spinning handle like an early 20th century music box. It was on a desk with countless other stuff like maps, bottles, and jewelry. The music box had a problem with the handle and stopped with the front of the handle facing the front of the box, but kind of down. What the thing was playing sounded like the transition periods between variations of excerpt C in The Chosen Priest and Apostle of Infinite Space by Bull of Heaven. It stopped very briefly for as long as the handle stopped, and then it would heave forward. The stopping periods were separated by about 2.5 seconds of music. After this happened, I ignored it and went to a simulation of Ed, Edd, N' Eddy in an Egyptian pyramid. I was controlling eddy. It felt kind of like VRChat. We passed through a corridor and found a tomb. I went back to the website and went to a friend at my school, who we'll call A. He checked it out, and it managed to disguise itself as a sound testing application. He said there was nothing to worry about, and when I went back to it, it continued the madness. After this happened, I gave up and saw Ed. I managed to convince Ed that he was some kind of evil vampire thing, and I said in eddy's voice as we left the classroom, "do you have anything to do?" and he replied with a maniacal Ed like laugh. I am honestly surprised the dream didn't end in an Iris-in and a transition to waking up.
      Categories
      non-lucid , nightmare , memorable
    14. The Insomniac Dilemma

      by , 12-07-2017 at 03:28 PM (The Internal and Subconscious World of DropTherapy)
      What happens when you have a dream when you don't get much sleep? Trust me, it isn't enjoyable.
      So last night, I was asleep about an hour after I went to bed when my dog Milo licked me on the face and tried to get on my bed. After that, he left. The only problem with this is that I could NOT go to sleep afterwards. I eventually did go to sleep. Briefly. Anyway, ther dream was very abstract. I was on my bed when my friend K got on my computer. I told him not to do it but he didn't listen. He only replied with "I will push your face onto the bed" and then he did just that with his hand. He relaxed his hand and I decided to close my eyes for some reason. He then began to push so hard that I felt like my head was gonna snap open. I woke up, and then went on my phone to write about the dream. I noticed that there was a song on my phone that wasn't originally there that I decided was my dream. All of a sudden, I couldn't see in front of my and my head was permanently locked looking at the wall to the left of me. I moved a bit, and then I became semi concious. Eventually, I fell back into the dream. This cylce of dreaming and then waking up happened a few times before I decided to move from that spot. I think the reason these dreams were so abstract was because of my slightly decreased sanity in that situation.
    15. Lost in the Green Building

      by , 09-20-2017 at 02:27 PM (The Internal and Subconscious World of DropTherapy)
      Fragment 1: I was testing out a new survival game with a friend where everything starts out black and white but then changes as you collect atoms. The more grayscale it is, the less basic actions you can do.
      Fragment 2:
      I remember going into this extremely maze like building with my family and losing them pretty quickly. I was going down stairs, up stairs, down halls, up halls, and the theme of the building never changed. It was always this green color, kind of like mint chip ice cream except darker.
      Fragment 3: This one ties in with fragment 2. After that, I found an outside area that resembles my school's blacktop where PE takes place in real life. There were about four or five different supply trucks kind of just sitting there. I apparently found my uncle, and I was also holding a glass of wine, but it resembled water in a fancy glass. I went to ask if the people in the trucks wanted some. One of them said no because they didn't want to lose their job. That made sense. After that, I saw my uncle swearing under his breath. I then lost him. I entered where the weight room usually is, and I found one of my friends in real life. We'll call him C. He was also lost. I also found this room to resemble my other friend's. We'll call him J. Anyways, I asked him if he was lost too, and he said yes. I then accidentally bumped into someone who looks a lot like my Substitute PE teacher in real life. We'll call her Mrs. T. Anyways, I asked her for directions and she said sure. She then put me in the bathroom right next to the room I was in. I saw her talking to C for a little bit, and then she decided to kidnap me and put me under the bed across from the room next to the bathroom for 2 years. She said something like "did you enjoy getting locked up for a few minutes? Well now you'll be here for two years! J can't help you cause he's too busy being on his computer!!!" She had a bit of generic Asian person in her voice for some reason. I then woke up at about 3:20 something.

      Updated 09-20-2017 at 02:50 PM by 89498

      Categories
      dream fragment , nightmare , memorable
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