nightmare

Notes
Dream


I did a wild tonight. I experienced SP vibrations for the first time and it actually happened. I believe i went straight into lucid dream in my parents house. When i woke up i tried to DEILD back in the dream. While also trying to remember key parts. But i decided to write it down. Waking up makes it hard to remember anything but i've got a good chunk/impression of what happened. Writing this down makes me feel more distanced from the dream itself but i'm very glad i did now.

There where loads of people in the house. All friends from dreamviews (i think, i can't recall this part). I had a little chat with everyone. Conversations where a little rough. Some where even annoyed by me. But that's okay, shit happens.

In the kitchen it was busy, people going about their business and Oneironaut was standing there. He didn't say anything until i started talking. And he was glad i finally acknowledged him and we kept talking. I was having trouble speaking to everyone in the room but not with O. Actually we had a great talk. It was very nice.

I was sitting at a large dinner table with Oneironaut next to me. Or not, There was a couch there from my grandma's house and peope where sitting there. There was this girl eating chips or something. An old friend of mine; Aziez. A very dark and very skinny guy came in from the backdoor. He was acting goofy. Stuffing his mouth full of french fries so that he can then try to eat it and most of it will fall on the floor. Making faces all the while. I laughed very loudly. Everytime i laughed he would look at me and be amused and he would do it again. I told this girl on the chouch that this guy is sooo funny. She smiled at me, she didn't laugh at him but she was amused that i thought it was so funny. Oneironaut was sitting next to me on the dinner table and even thou i wasn't looking at him, i felt his energy. He was a bit annoyed by me thinking it's so funny. He maybe even thought it was a little racist. Even tho it was not. Just plain funny.

I sitting at the dinner table with Oneironaut across me and we where talking face to face. I was talking bout my issues with Oneironaut. I said stuff like, well i am smart and i understand a whole lot of stuff. Very interesting stuff. But i can't share it with anyone because nobody will understand/believe me anyway. I don't know how to formulate things either so usually i end up looking stupid and dumb. But inside i'm not. I only talk with a few people. To the rest of the world i keep my mouth shut. O agreed i'm a pretty smart guy, and he gave me advice. We talked about a lot of things but this is all i remember

He didn't look like he does in the pics i've seen. In fact, he had a fatter face. And his face was old and wrinkled. He had grey spots all over his face. But i knew for sure it was him. When i acknowledged him and shook his hand he said : "Aaaah. He finally recognizes me." Even tho i knew all the time it was him.

At some point a glass vase dropped on the floor. The floor was covered with granules of glass. And i was lying in it. Glass was penetrating into my hands and all over my body. I was frightened. This amount of glass will hurt a lot and maybe even kill you. But i remembered reading someone's dream with something similar. All you have to do is remember it's a dream and that nothing can actually hurt you. I stood up awkwardly and still scared. But it was okay, i wasn't in pain anymore. I walked into the kitchen and this is a point of my dream where i can't remember the transition.

But i was going outside of the house, And i had to be somewhere. (Probably Chicken-Pittza) I knew where but as soon as i was outside and seeing all kinds of people i forgot where to go. But in my defense, the scene was completely out of this world bizzare strange and most of all. INTERESTING. What a giant mystery lol. Walking around in a lucid dream you see people all going about their business. But they are doing the most weird stuff. I was captivated.

Right in front of my parents house there is a broad busy street. There where 3 people. I think 2 guys and 1 girl. One of them was wearing an orange raincoat. They where riding bikes and staring at the same direction. They all pointed there and where amazed by what they saw. I did not care, i was trying to figure out their origin. Are they dreamers? Are they lucid? Why are they riding bikes when this is a dream? I tried telling them ; "Hey guys, this is a dream you don't have to ride bikes you can do whatever you want." "Look at me, i'm flying!"
No success. They where to absorbed in whatever was going on across the street to even notice me.

I was walking/flying/riding a bike and gradually losing lucidity. I watched as people did weird stuff. I passed a van and they where putting stuff in the van. It looked like they where burgling.
A few meters i passed the Phamacist. And there was a crowd of people there. In the middle of the crowd was a beautiful girl wearing a brightly coloured woolen sweater. All the people where trying to touch her and pulling on her clothes and stuff. She looked bored and annoyed but she didn't do anything to stop them.

I witnessed a lot of things and i noticed that, Everything that was happening around me followed some theme. Everything i saw was somehow relative to me, and the thought got confirmed by something that someone said around the corner. But i can't for the life of me remember what it was.

At some point i decided to go flying and i wasn't paying attention to anything anymore. I was just enjoying the thrill of flying around the city when the thought occured that i will probably slip into non-lucidity like this and i might forget all about the dream. I'm not sure how i woke up but i remembered my physical body. At some point i became aware of lying in my bed with my eyes closed. The dream lost it's vividness because of it and i was desperately trying to get back in the dream. (DEILD) While also trying to hold on to the memory of the lucid dream i just had. I kept repeating the words ; Oneironaut, LD, people on the street.

Soon after i was going to have the most intense wake up of my life. I just moved to a new place but i was lying in my bed under the impression that i was in my old room. Actually the furniture was dispositioned and it looked like the room i am in now. But the door was white like my old room. I wasn't quite myself, and i don't remember this. But it seemed like there was some guy standing across my bed. I was still trying to remember the dream repeating those words in my head but for some reason i started screaming. So loud, so real (i have yet to confirm with my fellow house residents if this happened) i screamed : "SHUT THEEE FUCKK UPPP!!!!!!!!!!!"


Then i realized, i just woke up from a FA and i screamed for no reason at all. My dad was downstairs and he heared me scream. He was extremely pissed and i heared him running up the stairs. With loud noise he made his way over to my room. I was frightened.. Paralyzed, frightened. Scared shitless. What was he going to do to me? He might not listen and hear me out that it's a dream punch my face in and maybe even kill me. I was beyond frightened. I tried to scream; Don't hurt me. I was dreaming, i can't help it. But no words came out. I was too paralyzed. All i made was high-pithced noises of fear and helplesness. I was desperate, he was almost in my room.
I wanted to wish the whole scene away. Fuck this, the entire world is a dream i can wake myself from this one even tho it's real life. I tried changing the scene, and the whole scene was shaking. I saw the my old room's white door shaking and just before my dad opened the door all noise stopped.

A white ghost floated through the door. It had white cloth, like in the movies. And i'm not sure if it had a face but it had a cross in the middle of his face. Leaving an impression of an actual person. But definetly a ghost. It moved trough the door and through the bed. Not interacting with anything. At some point i thought it stared at me and it was going to murder me. But it did nothing. It completely ignored me and floated right though my body. I was still paralyzed and frightened. I wished this ghost away aswell. It was probably going to float through the wall and it would be gone. But because i wished it away i stopped seeing it just before it passed trough my face. I was both relieved and disappointed.

I looked around the room, and i noticed i was in my actual room where i really live. People where outside, laughing. I heared people coughing in bed . And maybe they heared me scream and i woke them up. This is the point where i went outside to smoke a cigarette and evaluate what just happened. It was fucking crazy.

Long ass dream here with my best friend whose currently in jilla. (i think it's a signal dream)

I was at home with my friend O and we where just about to go outside. The sun was shining, i wanted to go right but my friend saw 2 guys on the left side and he wanted to go there.
I was reluctant but i agreed.

*dream skip, dont remember*

We are in a car with these 2 fellas and it turns out that they are two seasoned gangsters. They talked O into doing murders for them and we did. We went to some places and i think O killed some people.

*Dream skip*

Later we are walking down the street and they requested something hideous, O had to shoot a kid at a kid's party. We didn't want that. We ran.. We ran but realized if we just ran down the street they would catch up on us. I saw an alley somewhere and i said O get in here.
As soon as i was in the alley i realized one of them was going to come from one side and one from the back, they had us cornered.
There was a backgate of someone's house and it was not locked. I signallled for O to get inside, we did. We where standing in someone's back garden. I tried opening their backdoor and it was also open.

There where people in there and i was afraid to go in because they had a right for privacy.. (how dumb) We stayed outside and the gangsters saw us . They took us with them and we arrived in a park. There was one kid playing there near the river with a ball, a few minutes from now O was gonna shoot this kid. It was so sad.

O walked first and he started playing ball with the kid. Me and the gangsters got out of the car and we walked over there. There where suddenly loads of kids and was a busy kid party. I was standing near a wall thinking that O is gonna grab his gun any second now and kill this kid.

One of the gangsters came up and talked to me. He mentioned that they do kill people but they only do it at night. So O didn't have to kill this kid, he's only convinced he HAS to kill the kid. That's his problem he says.

Then a girl i knew stood next to me, Ashley. I said "Hey Ashley". She said "Hey Emiel"
Huh? Emiel, that's not my name. I looked over to my left and saw 2 babyfaced kids sitting there and i realized she was talking to them and one of them was Emiel.

**fuzzy memory, wake up**