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    FryingMan

    1. 2022-06-29 ballet audition pullups, worried about travel, mint ice cream?

      by , 06-29-2022 at 07:58 AM
      bedtime ~ 00:00
      final waking ~ 07:30

      Recall seems in a bit of a rut. Only late morning recall, and not very detailed.

      + [f] They're serving mint ice cream at a fancy restaurant?

      + with people, going to travel somewhere by car, we're going to have to squeeze about 5 people into a normal passenger car for a multi-hour long trip. I'm really apprehensive about this, I think it will be extremely uncomfortable.

      + outdoor multi-level area with people mulling about above and below. I'm on an upper level and I look over the edge down to the lower level, I want to jump down there but I'm a bit concerned about the landing, it might hurt my legs (it's at least a 20 foot drop, pretty far). I instead climb over the railing and let myself down a bit to lower the distance and let go. There are young people walking around and I think they're talking about me?

      + standing under double horizontal bars (2nd set higher than the first). I do a hands-facing away pullup on the lower bar, it's hard & slow but I make it, then I reach up to the higher bar and do a hands-facing-me chinup and pull myself up to the top of the bar. I think my dad is watching from higher above (on the road?)

      There is a ballet audition that involves making a very graceful pullup and raising your legs very slowly up to the ride and up and over the bar. There are two (male?) judges standing above the bar and critiquing the candidates. There is a younger (boy?) currently doing his performance, he does it well. Then it's my turn, I make the pullup, then I try to really artistically and very slowly raise my right leg up over the bar. It's really hard to do it slowly, and my leg gets stalled, but I push through it and get my leg up over the bar. I think I've done OK but I almost failed by not getting my leg up at all. I have a coach there with me standing with me and giving me encouragement. He asks why I moved my leg so slowly, I mention because I was really trying to be highly artistic.
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    2. 2022-06-28 couple short moments

      by , 06-28-2022 at 05:53 AM
      This week I started voice recording in the morning in order to better preserve dreams for journaling. When I have a chance I'll get these added. The voice recorder on my new mobile phone has a speech-to-text function, which should make getting the detailed text into the DJ much easier. I'll still be reviewing and correcting the entries since the conversion has mistakes occasionally.

      + Memory of more dreams and situations with people, in places doing things...but they've faded

      + I'm in the shower, (there's a sudden sound/bang?), I look up, and I see through the ceiling to the roof structure (and a bit of sky?). Something's wrong with the house? I get out and am standing in the hallway, when my Jr High Best friend DD enters the bathroom. I call to him to stop, he turns around and faces me, he's naked. His face is very similar to how he looked in High School. I'm telling him there's something wrong with the shower. My sister is there, too. I think he has no modesty, as he's standing full on facing us through the bathroom door and my sister is probably getting a good look at his (ahem). I'd expect to see his hairy pubic region but with a glance everything is smooth and all the anatomy is missing, like a doll.

      + CD, "we program only in pure m4." I'm thinking about what that would mean, are they using C++ together with m4? The m4 would result in "cleaner" C++, just using simple classes for organizing data and nothing fancier than that?
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    3. 2022-06-21

      by , 06-21-2022 at 06:49 AM
      bedtime 23:20, out of bed 08:10
      final waking ~07:30

      some dreaming, but memories from earlier in the night faded quickly
      emphasized going back to sleep quickly for good, 8 hours of sleep
      need to record keywords at each waking.

      earlier:
      + see boy scout equipment lying around on ground, see my inflatable ThermaRest pad, I'm picking out/up equipment, choose an [imaginary] saw? Blue colored? large, rounded teeth, like a saw-tooth shark nose

      + following a (plane?car) up a narrow windy hill road, I'm tailgating it, it's (we're?) going to take off?

      later:
      Some vivid moments but the memories really fade quickly upon waking. Need to work on grabbing recall instantly after waking before even the smallest movement


      + away from home base at some sort of cafe/restaurant/rest stop, I walk by some girls on my right and glance side-long at them, I see one (I know her?) with large breasts, the outline/shape of which are shown by her clothing.

      Talking with someone about whether or not we should return, considering it's a 30-minute drive, they encourage me to go on home, so I do.

      Arriving near to home I'm laying back and spreading my legs wide and getting everything "aired out", I'mr riding on something without roof or walls.
      On the grounds, I see a straight long lower alley (of grass?) (with sloping sides leading down into it) leading far in to the distance, passing under a dark bridge at 90 degrees to the path. In the distance there is a (white? light colored) wall with graffiti written on it in different colors, words, and young people are busy scrubbing it off

      Spoiler for sensitive content:
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    4. 2022-06-20 wave, ski trip, rifle shot with S1/S2 & hokey, frat row at night, tea, meet the van guys

      by , 06-20-2022 at 05:58 AM
      earlier:

      + on beach, scuba/ snorkel training to left in the surf, I turn my back to the ocean, am hit by large wave, and dragged back in to the water, I think I'm a great swimmer but I am completely at the mercy of the waves and powerful current. A wave pushes back up to beach (but I can't get out) but on a second wave I get my feet underneath me and run quickly up the beach out of the reach of further waves

      + discussion with group about ski trip plans, some are upset we didn't get going at 1am

      later:

      + in (large-ish) room in house, lying on floor, with combo sniper rifle/shotgun. sighting at cork lying on floor along wall curved large radius meeting joint of floor and wall, switching back and forth between rifle mode and shotgun mode (there was a small level to do this about halfway down the barrel of the gun). I'm trying to decide between bullet/rifle mode and shotgun mode. I could try for shotgun mode at first to make sure I hit the cork to make sure my sighting is correct. I think I'm close enough that the blast should be fairly contained and not fan out too much to the surrounding area. I decide to shoot, and squeeeeeeze trigger slowly (as I remember is recommended) and take the shot cork zips all the way down to the far wall, bounces, and returns back to its original location, S1 & S2 come in and I say "hey did you see that?! How it bounced right back?" Then turn around looking at stuff on floor/wall boundary with S2, I think about using (crumpled up newspapers?) to pick it up and take/throw it away, I say to S2 "You can ask S1 to help you with this.'

      Looking at toy hokey game, seems like 2 vs 2 players but there are more levers (about 8), I'm looking at the right-side levers, the right-most is missing the rubber twisty handle with ridges. The lever about 3rd or 4th from the right is pretty seriously bent and wrapped around another lever, I untangle them a bit and comment on this bent lever, think about about the play of the game and shooting the puck around.

      + giving a tour of frat row to some (friends?), including young woman. We're riding by vehicle but the view is unobscured. My gaze is fixed on the frat buildings on the right side of the street relative to direction of car. It's dark/twilight. The frat buildings are tall (3-4 stories) and dark (no lights within). I'm trying to look through the windows to see the things I expect to see inside (trophies?).

      At the end of the street the group is walking and we encounter a van that drives up and stops near me on a "T" intersection, it approaches from the right. I know I need to arrange a meeting with these guys (they're govt officials?), I "remember" we pre-arranged a meeting at a point on the street back from where we (walking group) came from. I tell the driver we'll met you there. I turn our group around and start walking towards the meeting point. I think we're walking on a street different from where the van is going to park and I wonder if they'll exit their vehicle and walk around to our street to meet us.

      With group, there is a requirement for some of us (me and 2 other guys, one an older man) to drink a drink with tea, sugar, and some bright fruit juice. It comes time, but all I can find is tea with a lot of sugar, so I drink it. The man comments about the missing juice, calling it "<something> urine (?)".
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    5. 2022-06-17 LDD #266 dancing stars, Losing L, glass house, fire room/vodka perv, bus/music

      by , 06-17-2022 at 06:12 AM
      + losing L
      Some sort of business proposition (with L?) about ambulances, I don't understand and ask for clarification.
      There is a business meeting on an open field outside in twilight with a large group of women. They're all very positive about it, and I'm impressed at the swift level of approval of our idea. To my right on the grass I see some lines of what I believe is wiped/scuffed dog crap (it's brown and the right texture).

      I have a new romantic object and I'm really torn about what to do about L. I'm planning to leave L for the risky new romance. I think it's not fair to L. I speak with her and tell her that I need to move on. I think I'm taking a huge risk, I really love L and don't want to lose her. In a large auditorium [DS] for a talk/presentation/show, standing among the seats in the center, then I move (with L) to and aisle on the left hand central side, and an usher comes up and tells us to clear the aisle. I get annoyed and point back to where I was and say that I already had a seat. I look around and see that the seats have filled up where we previously were and all through the auditorium, and the only free spots are in the extreme corners/edges. I see a string of free seats near me and head into them with L, moving from the left central aisle towards the center of the auditorium. I see that JaCon (T5) is seated there, so I go up to him and L and I sit down, JC is on my right and L is to my left. I wonder about how to introduce L: my former love? my friend? I decide to say "JC, this is Lena, Lena, this is JC, my friend from T5. She externs her hand across me under my ams on the arm rests to shake JC's hand. I take her hand in mine after that, and I'm deeply saddened by the fact that I won't be able to take her hand in the future.

      I'm adjusting some written materials now that L and I are breaking up. I'm looking at my signature close up on paper. I recognize the first letter of my first name written in cursive but it is still strange and not quite from the alphabet. It's written in blue/green. I read then my last name in a stylized script font, very clear and regular shapes like on a computer. This is not my handwriting. I realize that it was written this way specifically to be highly legible.

      + glass house
      There is a glass house on a hill, someone breaks in there is tons of broken glass everywhere, there is a (glass?) dog lying on the ground a bit away from the house, covered with sequins that gets covered by the sharp shards of glass. I start to clear away the glass from the dog, it's owner (woman?) approaches

      later:
      + bus/music
      Seated on a bus (left-hand side near the front, where I used to site in Jr High) with a girl putting together a [my instrument]. I'm using a bottom piece from a professional player, mixing and matching pieces to build up an instrument. The player and an older woman (organizer?) are there, standing in the aisle to my right. The (woman?) recognizes me as a (normal and bass version of my instrument) player, and I acknowledge that yes, I play both. The player takes back his borrowed bottom piece saying I don't need it, I think I do but then realize I don't and say I could just play the bass version while the girl could play the normal version.

      + LDD #266 LD DILD DDILD
      stairway stars lucid man hat take me to group goose girl take her hand continue walking dream fades
      repeat non-lucid ask man take me to group, enter auditorium [DS], from right side (facing stage), go to left side (or am just there), undress girl (many layers of pants!), ushers come and kick us both out, heavy makeup, I remove her makeup and we sneak back inside the auditorium

      Climbing a stairway outside evening softer light, looking up into the sky above bare trees at the top of the staircase. Around the moon I notice a shifting / dancing pattern of bright little solid yellow "pentagram" 5-point shaped stars. They're fading in and out, becoming fuzzy/vague, then returning to clarity. Especially when they rotate in a circle that really gets my attention, I recognize that as a dream sign, and do a nose pinch, I can breathe, now I'm lucid. I walk up to the top of the stairs, there are people walking buy, I grab the arm of a man with a straw hat and tell him to take me to a large group of people, and I add that I know that they are nearby (so as not to waste time). I begin walking on a path to the right. An attractive young woman (short brunette hair) comes along and I reach out and give her a squeeze but don't want to get too engrossed, so I just take her right hand and turn to the right and continue walking along the path with her, happy, looking around at the detail, and the dream fades...


      I then repeat this plot non-lucidly (not a pure replay the visuals are different): I find a man and task him to take me to a large group of people. I enter an auditorium [DS] from the back right (facing stage). I find a young woman and begin pulling down her pants: there is layer after layer of pants and when I think I finally have reached the last one and expect to see her [ahem], there is nothing really to see. An usher comes and shoo's us out of the auditorium out of a left-side exit. The young woman's face is very heavily made up with colorful makeup. I clean off her face and then want to sneak back in to the auditorium past a security turnstyle, hoping that we won't be recognized.

      + fire room
      In a medium-sized room in a house, combined bedroom (left) living room (right). In the living room there is a fireplace with an automated fire system. I'm watching it mesmerized by its changing form and function. It has wheels and gears and metal bars/lines that move and shape change. There is fire spewing out of the open pipes. It's shaped in rectangles and a spinning circle in the middle. I think that this could be dangerous for us in the room. The fireplace changes into a flamethrower shooting a stream/column of fire into the room, sweeping the room from corner to corner, I think there's no way to escape.

      SphGrv is there lying on the bed on the left side, with her brother(?). She is lying in an provocative post and I think I catch a glimpse of a portion of her [ahem]. I wonder if she would like it if I went over there and engaged with her?

      Then she and others are on a central bed. There is an old fat perv guy trying to get her and the women drunk on vodka. He is pouring them huge glasses of the stuff, I can't believe the amount, it must be like 100ml or more, even for SG. SG takes the glass but does not drink, I can see she clearly does not want to. The man himself has poured and is drinking bourbon. He's encouraging her to drink. I'm talking to him, asking him about what kind of bourbon he has. He responds gruffly not wanting to share, (that it would spoil his taste?), I reply I don't want to drink it, I just wanted to know what it was. Later I get SG aside and tell her I'm really glad she avoided drinking the vodka.

      +[f] Someone at my pepper! It was growing on a plant [waking life true!] I was nursing along, and someone picked it without my permission!

      By the way this is my 800th DJ entry on DV!
      Categories
      non-lucid , memorable
    6. 2022-06-16

      by , 06-16-2022 at 08:03 AM
      + escape the firestorm from CH, bank cards, passports
      I'm in CH and I (hear explosions?) and I see a massive firestorm approaching up the hill towards the house. There is no time to take any belongings, I must escape immediately. I run out of the house and higher up in to the hills, hoping that the higher ground will be safe. Walking far away from CH along GPB

      + See CrLe (WFP)'s workspace with a pile of TTL chip boards

      +[f] going somewhere in a large van with a group, I'm in the back seat with tons of room in front of me before the front seats

      later:
      + in a group (at work? seems like a relaxed social situation), we're going out to celebrate my and (my sons? colleague?) birthday together. I'm 40 and he's 25. [Deceased] wife EW makes funny comment about what about when I'm 80?

      +[f] sitting (at desk?) Indian coworker AS ("S") comes up and leans over my garbage can to my left (near my head), I think he's spitting out my gum

      final:
      + sitting along the banks of a river, shallow completely transparent water [DS], some young boy is playing in the water near the shore, he's submerged and holding himself in place against the current with his hands. Then I see a sort of padded construction (like the face rest on a massage table) in front of him that I think allows him to stay in place by letting the current press his face against the pad, this frees his hands. I note my younger son S2 is sitting in the highest position on the steeply sloping bank (eating lunch?), sitting higher up than any other the other people around us. I (write?) a note on white paper and take it in to the river with older son S2, I want to show it to him, I'm closer to the center of the river than the earlier mentioned boy, and position myself alongside him, son S2 is with me and I open up the paper and I want S2 to read it.
      Categories
      non-lucid
    7. 2022-06-15 almost LD

      by , 06-15-2022 at 06:05 AM
      Earlier dreams: vague, forgotten, something with my two kids in their younger years, in a place, something to do with their clothing?

      next to last waking, tried a brief Raduga-style DEILD entrance disassociation, didn't work so went back to sleep with the intent to get lucid.

      + in St. house (central valley) of cousins, key moments:

      my (deceased wife EW?) tells me she wants to show me something (?), if I wanted to follow and see, I say yes, I go and in the next room a guy (who lives there?) presents me with a basket of odd berries. It's a fairly large basket, the color is dark blue almost black like blueberries, and they are shaped like flat triangles or little hat shapes. Some of them are wet, and there are little berry-sized dark blue woolen caps in the basket, I notice this and mention it.

      go out front door to entrance area there are two suitcases there I want to bring them in to avoid them being stolen as this covered porch area only has a flimsy screen door protecting it, and I'm wondering about crime in the St. area. It's very hot outside and I don't want to spend a long time outside so as not to let out all the cool air inside the main house from the A/C. In the background I hear the A/C running. Looking at the screen door on the main door to the house, I see it's bent in a number of places with large gaps between the screen and the door frame. It's Sunday and I think my cousin and her husband will probably be going to church, I'm not sure though, I wonder if they'll ask me to come.

      inside the house I walk by a door next to a window and I see that a distant laser turret is firing at the door (part of a game I decide?). The laser blast hits the door with a weak "splat" and slightly opens the door by an inch or so. I watch through the window as a couple more laser shots arrive and hit the door. They're orange colored bolts.

      I'm explaining to my hosts (young/early middle aged), a woman and man, about the game: that there's a target like a darts target (like the one there hanging on your wall over there, I point out) hanging on the inside of the door, and the turret is firing at it.

      The woman is asking me about my (dream?) experiences with those older women, I "remember" them being grandmother aged and completely not a romantic interest and say so. The woman comes up to me (I'm lying on the carpet at this point) and wraps a paper darts target around my feet and binds it to me with tape. I tell her "you realize that by reinforcing my dream subjects like this [with me here being awake], it will likely promote having a lucid dream!" At this point (or just after the nose pinch) Sensei walks by and into the next room and makes a comment like "I'm not going to let positive expectation rule my life." I disagree with him, I think that's not at all what LDing is about. I decide to nose pinch since the subject of dreaming has come up an awful lot in the last few moments, and I get a very firm grasp and still a bit of air leaks, so I keep grasping harder and harder until no air moves at all. I also think that I could try levitating since my legs are bound and I'm lying on the floor.

      .... Then I awake and realize I've just missed a chance for an LD!
      Categories
      non-lucid
    8. 2022--6-13 short fragments

      by , 06-13-2022 at 06:48 AM
      I'm usually reaching for recall after moving and getting up while walking to the bathroom. Need to set intent and re-train to delve a bit before moving after waking.

      + [f] I'm with a group laying pipes in an underground cement service area

      + in a group of people walking around carrying little kids

      + interrupt Fr. Brown in the middle of a church service, I'm bringing terrible apocalyptic news that can't wait, both he and the parishoners attending are very upset at the interruption

      + in a group of young people in a large U-shaped rectangular padded booth. Some more adults are coming and I don't want to lose my desired spot next to the cute girls so I lunge to the seat very close to them and turn around and sit down

      + [f] something about cucumbers
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    9. 2020-06-03 fairly vivid later dreams

      by , 06-03-2022 at 12:05 PM
      Some vivid moments last night, last couple dreams especially.

      earlier:

      + breaking up into teams to play water polo, views of some (men?) dressed up in women's one-piece swim suits.

      + walking through a house with a woman close to me, I'm trying to plan our path to avoid being detected by a small robot which is tracking us, woman screams "I HATE YOU" at me, I'm stunned and speechless.

      mid:
      + in my sister's room in CH, holding at looking at an opened racy magazine, guy comes in I try to hide it under her bed, then move to my room and think to hide it in closet or under my bed

      later:
      + my son has rented out one of my properties to a group of party-goers without my permission, I'm outraged and complain loudly to the people I find there, but in the end allow it to continue and wish them to "have a good time"

      + I'm staring in to the eyes of an attractive woman. I feel a twinge of sexual excitement, I may be able to "reach completion" just by continuing this gazing. I look closely at her features, and she is staring back at me, I realize she reminds me of somebody I know.

      + driving in a car on a disintegrating, slightly elevated sandy, narrow country road flanked by a stream on either side, my way is blocked by a huge pile of recently cut fir branches, I try to reverse/go around, the pile vanishes, I walk through a crowd of people mulling around a local dairy vendor
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