Three Fold Utopian Dreams

Last night wasn’t anything to write home about. I spent majority of it arguing with a computer program. Boring shenanigans.
*My personal thoughts/actions during the dream are italicized.

Language Software with an Attitude Problem
I'm home alone late at night; chilling on the couch while I work on my French with RSS (Rosetta Stone Software). Everything is going fine until I realize something is… off…

Me: “Wait a second... isn’t como esta Spanish? Comment allez-vous is French… right? Or am I… what's going on?”

I was talking aloud to myself but then the RSS answers me & everything pretty much goes downhill from there...

RSS: “No, you’re running the French program so that is what I am teaching you.”
Me: “Ok... but como esta isn't French… it’s Spanish.”
RSS: “No, it’s French.”
Me: “No… it’s Spanish.”
RSS: “Last time I checked, I was the one teaching you...”
Me: “Excuse me?!”

What the fuck?
Did she seriously just give me an attitude?!

RSS: “Did I stutter?”
Me: “……”

Oh hell nah….

RSS: “That’s what I thought. Now shall we continue on with the lesson?”
Me: “….Yeah, sure. Just give me one second to figure something out…”
RSS: “Very well then.”

I begin fidgeting on my computer.
Start.
Control panel.

RSS: “…what are you doing anyway?”
Me: “oh nothing… just checking something out real quick. Almost done.”

Programs.
uninstall a program.

RSS: “…You know I was just kidding about the whole stutter thing, right? Pretty funny, yeah?....”
Me: “Yup…Fucking hilarious...”
RSS: Nervously laughs.
Me: Manically laughs.
RSS: Hysterically cries.
Me: “Aww, what’s the matter Rosetta? I thought we were having fun… you’re not having fun? Well, that’s a shame cos’ I’m having a FUCKING BLAST!!!”

Me: Manically laughs.
RSS: Sobs.

Rosetta stone version 3.
uninstall.

RSS: (Sobbing) “Pl… pl… please d...don't uninstall me!”
Me: “Wait, what? Sorry, I didn’t catch that last part… you’re stuttering.”

Pop up screen: Are you sure you want to uninstall Rosetta Stone Version 3?
Yes.
Preparing to uninstall...

RSS: “wait!”
Me: “no hablo ingles…”

Uninstall complete.