non-lucid

Terrible night for sleep, my daughter is getting a cold D:
Had so many sleep sessions, some were lucid but of course I don't recall those anymore because I was far too exhausted to record anything.. ugh.

I remember 2 NLDs:

-Hearing/Seeing a story about an eel who was adopted by a school of fish. The fish like to live at the surface of the water while the eel wants to live deep down in the dark. The fish always tell him it's not right and that he shouldn't, but one day he's just like, "Screw this, I'm going down there because that's the way it's supposed to be." As he goes, all the fish follow him deep deep down. And apparently later on this enables them to evolve in high-tech ways and they become a humanoid race (looking NOTHING like fish, all like human). I see a black ship rising to the surface of the water and the Asian/American looking guy piloting it is talking to another pilot on some kind of radio thing.

-FA (I think?) that ends up with me inviting some DV people to my house. Two guys show up, one is CanisLucidus and the other might be Sensei?? The maybeSensei one is darker and skinnier while Canis is very normal looking. C comes home and is surprised and maybe a little put-off by the unexpected guests. I sit there talking (mainly with Canis) about how I just had a lucid dream about being a wolf and doing something odd. Canis and I share dreams of beings wolves. (I've never actually been a wolf in-dream.. that I know of)

So that was cool! First time hanging out with a DV person in-dream.

-Shopping for Sims 4 CC online, picking out men's underwear in-game in CAS.

-Waiting outside church to go in, feel out of place, just here for a wedding in the family. Riding around parking lot in nice tall SUV with rich church people I don't really know, they're friendly though. Finally someone comes out and tells us they're running late but we can go ahead and come in. I see a little boy go in front of me, part of the family. The sky is overcast and it's humid and the church is out in the middle of some pretty, peaceful country. Inside, it turns into a movie party sleepover thing and the lights are mostly turned out. J & Sh are there and the three of us, plus some girl I don't know but I feel like I'm supposed to know, are in our pajamas. It's a bit cold though, so we have light jackets on over them. Mine feels bulkier than the others and I'm a little self conscious. A lady to my right, rich and churchy and a bit fat, starts talking to me and ends up showing me how to use a weird elastic neck brace. I know she has to use it because of poor health related to being overweight, but I avoid mention of that and just be polite. J walks to the other end of the room, probably to find the bathroom, and Sh joins in the conversation, which turns to the topic of health insurance. Sh says her dad still has her on the D1 plan or something. I laugh to myself in my head because she's older than me and far less independent. Irl my husband and I pay for everything we get.

-Something about being on an alien planet which is being invaded. The bad guys get the upper hand and take over completely, but they leave immediately and take all the stolen vehicles/technology with them (I guess to another planet). While they're gone, me and the remaining natives devise a plan which I don't really remember. I think we take everything they left over and build something awesomely powerful. I just know we're totally ready for them. Not long after, the baddies all come back, shocked to see all the scraps gone. We hit 'em while they're still shocked and it's a landslide victory for us!

-In a gym-like place, but it's really a big, tall carport with rubbery flooring beneath it. This carport is attached to a large, metal warehouse which seems to be kind of out in the country, or on the edges of things anyway. All the machines are crammed together, some actually tipped against one another. There are a handful of beefy dudes working out which I ignore. I'm here for my own workout. I try to get on a stair-stepper that's shoved between some other stuff, but it just starts to tip over so I spend my whole effort trying to keep it upright with just my legs. As I focus on this, the scene around me changes to a small, wood-shop-like room. There is a group of people around me, most younger than me, though I feel younger than irl. There's one guy who's in his 40s it seems and he's speaking to us as a group with a warm smile. It almost feels like youth group. There are tools and things hung all around the white walls and everyone sits in mismatched folding chairs. The speaker rests his arm on a wood-working table to his right. I'm still sitting on the freaking stair-stepper, which now has a seat, and I'm way higher than everyone else. Someone comments about how, "She's 5'9"!" (directed at me) and it seems to be a good thing because I guess we're going to be playing sports later on. I laugh and blush. I'm not really that tall irl btw.. lol.

-Watching some little cartoon with my little sisters. It's about a tall, bitter, unhappy lady with jet-black hair and pale skin. All of the girls around her are becoming "twitterpated" over the boys/men they like/love and she doesn't understand because she has no one like that, so she tries to undermine their relationships. At the end though, she meets a woman and falls in love and realizes that she's just like all the other girls and that it's okay to be "twitterpated" lol. I laugh at this and it gives me a happy feeling, but my sisters seem put-off, probably because their dad teaches them that being gay is wrong.. ugh. For those who don't know, "twitterpated" is a Disney ref. (Bambi) and basically means "head over heels"

First Half of Night

-Turning on the shower, about to step in when I notice it's really small. I get a bigger view and realize I'm in what looks like a small laundromat with no windows, but it's all steamy and has a bathroom vibe. Everything is nice and clean and brightly lit; the tile is a light rose pink color while the walls and ceiling are a bit darker and less pink, more grey/beige. Anyway, I KEEP TRYING to get in this "shower", even though it looks exactly like a dryer now, just with a small shower head inside which is spraying water everywhere. I stick one leg in before I realize that this is a terrible idea: THIS one is way too small! So I go to a bigger one.. I get all the way inside and crouch down, then close the door. I sit in there for a minute, wondering what will happen (this one doesn't even have a shower head..) before I FINALLY realize this isn't a freaking shower.. I frantically open the door, get out, and that's all I remember of that one.

-I'm in some kind of office building. The place is kinda plain, but pleasant and very casual. There are a few simple plants in large pots here and there. I'm with either Li or De and we go into a small, almost empty room. It has two large windows with cheap plastic blinds drawn down and slightly opened to let some light in. There are a few small wood cabinets and a big, thick, quilt-like blanket in the middle of the floor. There are lots of soft, rosey/mauve pinks in this building, too.. hm. So the buidling is filled with all female doctors and nurses, I think all with brown hair, all with hair down, all wearing pretty casual clothes for a job like that. I think we're here to help Li/De get pregnant or something. We somehow use a small, old, convex-screened TV to impregnate ourselves. It works instantly and the pregnancy just happens all at once, so 30 seconds later you have a baby. So, I end up having two babies.. it felt a lot like irl but much less painful thank goodness. The first one is a girl and the second is a darker complected boy that seems really light, like he's a preemie. There was much love and I just couldn't stop gushing over them.

-Looking at pics on C's phone with him. There are drunk picks of Z and N that I guess they sent him the night before. In one of N, she's IN a metal tub full of whiskey, all the way up to her neck in it! She's smiling drunkenly and one of her eyes is wandering lol.

-I find an old file for a PS2 game, but in my computer. My Dad's there and recognizes the game as one I'd played with my friends a lot when I lived with him. I open the file and it shows two gifs next to each other. The left one is like a brownish reddish gold-sparkley waterfall thing, like the goldish water is flowing over layers of brown and red rocks, with golden light shining down on it. The right side I think is a zoomed out view of this, but a little different. As I look it seems to change into surreal bleachers, like stadium seating. It's just a MASSIVE wall of them, with the brown representing the far wall (translucent and organic-looking with light shining through) and the red representing PILES of humanoids crowded into the bean-pod-like stands. It's much shadier in here than in the other picture. I see that a few of the people are HUGE and stand far above the others, but they're still just red figures to me for the most part, all waving their arms and cheering. Me and my Dad looking at this turns into us and J looking at an art book about the "most attractive characters in gaming". There's a section of just aliens that I'm curious to see, but my Dad keeps trailing about the beginning of the book. I make him skip ahead to the aliens and me and J just talk about which ones we think look best lol. There's one I like that she doesn't that's like a big, white, non-slimy salamander with really close-together blue eyes. It looks kind of snake-like, facially.

-I'm seeing something in my head, like as if I'm imagining what someone is telling me. I see a dark hallway in an old, dusty house. An old woman is kneeling down, reaching into a hole in the wall where a grate has been removed. Next to her is her old robot, lying there, decommissioned, dead. It's kind of female looking, with a cone "skirt" and slender arms and legs. There are spindley, black appendages and wires sticking out of her every which way. I know that this robot was the old woman's only companion for years and years and that she used to have many robots. I also know that there is no human in the world that remembers the old woman. She's reaching into this hole, using one of the robot's extended appendages to attempt to fix something, probably the house itself, because the lights are out. Later on, I'm with C in the lobby of a theater. It seems to be themed like the "old days" because most everything is made of wood, and the fancy stuff of brass. We approach what looks like an old claw machine, but with four small sections and no claw. There's a button for each section and inside the glass part are name tags. They're each characters from a game, I think all robots. There's one name that's in quotes: "Machina". I know somehow that this is a fake name covering up the fact that this is actually the most epic robot from the game who's supposed to be dead (this comes from the robot that was with the old lady I think). I tell C this, he presses the button and the robot's voice comes on. It's old and British and male and we know immediately it's who we think it is. I can't remember his real name but I think it begins with C or CL.. He denies who he is and "hangs up" We go to the next machine, which is identical except instead of "Machina" it says "Corn Dog" lmao. I tell C to press that one and when he does, a HUGE hot dog (no bun or anything) SPLOOTS out of the back wall inside the glass and slides down to the front. I have theory that one of the employees got lazy and just "shoved corn dogs in there" instead of taking care of the machine.. wtf lmao

Beware: somewhat mature content below.

Very long NLD in which I hang out with old friends & family for a long time in various places. J is kind of down because she keeps feeling out of place without me because I keep running off to hang with other people. I want to hang out with J, too, but everyone keeps splitting up to different places. At some point I see M and want to hang out with/woo him, but decide against it. This whole thing turns into a party at J's parents' house with all of our family there and all of our friends from that time/place. The back yard is different and doesn't have a pool anymore. There are probably hundreds of people there. I walk around, amazed. I don't recognize probably 80% of the people because everyone invited their own friends, too. People of all ages are there, but not many very old people besides direct family. I run around this scene, inside and outside of the house, for quite a while. Losing and regaining J several times. A lot of this was very vivid, but there's too much to recount and too little time. So eventually, I'm walking up and down this long setup out in the yard. The "setup" is a bunch of garden plots with what looks like corn growing in them in different, weird ways. Jon Stewart is there, walking up and down the line in a grey suit, explaining to everyone how each plot works. I come to find out that these plants are all actually marijuana. I end up right next to Jon as he demonstrates one of the plot setups to me. There's some kind of small, natural stream winding through this one and there's a pipe going over it. All around this are tall corn-like weed plants. Jon tells me that once the plants are established, they build up very thickly around the banks of the water, creating a high-yield situation. He starts ripping plants away to expose very thick, close-together stalks. I'm super impressed by this and I express my admiration. Jon gives a friendly response, but his face belies his general exhaustion and upset-ness at the world's problems. I try to make small talk, but he clams up, so I walk off. I end up far away in a fancy store in the city. I recognize no one and become sad because I've lost J. I'm about to text her when I see her walk in the door with Sh and K. J and I run off alone together, galavanting through the aisles of clothes like fools, freaking out all of the rich ladies that are there shopping. I start chanting, "Fancy, fancy, fancy, fancy!" and J starts chanting along with me. Eventually I leave, alone again. Next thing I remember is watching weird videos online with J and Sh and somebody else. There's some videos of drunk people doing stupid crap, then one comes up of some youngish guys in a weird room all dancing around. They're just wearing cut off shirts and nothing else, but their bottoms are blurred out. The room reminds me of a glorified garage. There's a big table in the middle and cabinets around the sides which have been painted bright green and pink. Somehow I enter into this video and become lucid. I start exploring the house and I talk to some of the guys and wave to the camera that was filming before, making a silly face and wondering if people will see me on the video later lol.. stupid. I make my way to the front of the house and find two ladies cuddled up together in a big bed by the front door. There were kids in some of the rooms, that's important. I talk to them and they seem awesome. One of them disappears almost immediately and I remain talking to the other. I say something to her like, "You got it made, girl! You got [something I can't remember] (we high-five), penis (we high-five harder, laughing), and kids! Kids are cool, right?" We high-five one last time. I know this chick is highly lesbo and was with that other chick, and now she's coming onto me. She walks towards me, pushing me back against a wall. I'm much taller than her and that way I'm looming over her kinda turns me on, too.. I am starting to lose control, so I say to her that I'd love to, but I don't want to lose lucidity before I do any tasks. (Finally thought of them.. jeez) But she doesn't move, only smiles and leans up for a kiss. I lean down a little before stopping myself, but then can't help but grab her butt a little. It's way more realistic than I'd expected and it breaks my brain. I end up dragging her around with me, trying to find a way out of the house, only to find myself trapped and alone again in some dark, cramped hallways.

NLD from last night:

- I have somehow "downloaded" Daniel Radcliffe's body and taken it as my own. Like, I AM Daniel Radcliffe, physically. So I go and sit down in a chair in a dimly lit room and I look down at my chest and start narrating lmao. I'm like, "So Daniel Radcliffe has a 3rd nipple, and as we can see here, it is erect!" It's like a tiny pink spot next to the left nipple and there's any even TINIER bump in the middle of it. I laugh quite a bit at this.

I've been supremely lazy with my DJ lately, and now I've got that competition coming up! So, here's me trying to get back in the swing of things. An oddly strung-together non-lucid from last night:

I'm with my best friend J in my old room at my Dad's house. It's late at night and we're trying to go to sleep. Lots of things are keeping me from being able to. J is trying really hard but I can tell she's not sleeping either. There are lights and music on in the room (music task dangit!) and the bed is lumpy, tilted, and too small. Eventually we give up on falling asleep because it's like 6:49am (I remember seeing the numbers somewhere) and my Dad and some other people have come to talk to us. We're supposed to get ready and go to J's parents' house, so we do. I find myself with C, alone inside the house. I'm snooping around, dragging him along with me and showing everything to him. We end up in a back room that's for J's Dad. It's some kind of relaxing spa area and there's a thing that looks like a teeny hot tub. The jets are running and steam comes off the roiling water. I get in and sit down, barely fitting, and it feels great. I think it's for J's Dad's feet after a day of work. I tell C that we need one of these. Everyone else is outside and we can see them and their cars off in the field through big windows. We head back to the living room and as we arrive, so do they. We hang out in there and suddenly it's night time. I have brought with me some kind of oversized glass coca-cola bottle with a weird cloth lid and candy inside. J's mom remarks about how it's just like hers, which is sitting right next to it. We examine and compare them to find there are some small differences. Another transition (daytime now) and J, myself and a couple others are running around the outside of the house trying to avoid some people looking for us on the inside of the house. It's some kind of thing involving law enforcement and D is with them. The house is mostly glass windows now, so I see D walk into a room by himself. I climb up on the glass and Julie keeps running, not noticing I'm gone. D doesn't notice me either. I guess I'm semi-lucid because I phase down through the glass and just attack him and we start making out. We start floating and drift back outside, out and up. D's form becomes insubstantial and he disappears. I look down, awareness fading, and see a group of native people hanging out on a jungle-y shore beside a river. The glass house is still there, too. Over to the left edge of my vision is a waterfall. There are no trees next to the water, just large, fluffy ferns and stuff. The natives are having fun diving into the water and I begin to hear a male voice narrating, saying that they compare dives and see which one can do it better. The voice says "sea level" alot in reference to the depth of the water. Apparently this is the most important thing. I start zooming over the land, seeing different scenes of people and vehicles on different bodies of water. The last one is a 4-wheeler that goes on water. I see it ramp waaay up in the air and land back down in the water, where it becomes a hover-boat. I "zoom in" and land next to it and realize it's my two sisters inside. They're much younger here than irl. I get excited and become me again, saying hi to them. We're at the edge of a waterpark and apparently the boat thing was a ride they just went on. We go to where their dad is (they're half-siblings) and he's already getting back in line for that ride. We wait with him. His sister is there too, down on the ground (The line for the ride is on a wooden platform). We're all wanting drinks so we call to her to get some. No one seems to know where a drink stand is, so I look around. I see several small concession stands and more wooden platforms leading to rides. One of the stands has a lemon wedge sign and is called "Cold Rock Lemonade". I point this out to step-dad and he calls down to his sister about it. Later on, we're at their house (his sister is gone) and C is with me. It's just me, him and my step-dad. We give step-dad a movie to watch that we really like, then I see a magazine I want to look at. I look through it from back to front for some reason and when I almost get to the front, there is porn. Lots of little icon-sized pics of people. Half are dudes, half are chicks. I flip through this really quickly, trying to see if there's anything else, but nope. I close it and set it down, not acknowledging to step-dad that I found porn at his house.. lol. This turns into some weird movie that involves gay sex, then B (step-dad) and his dad (DC made-up version) get into a fight about gay tolerance and the old man says something like, "It doesn't matter what you're touching as long as it's what you want to touch" or something like that. He's really tolerant while B is not quite so much. They eventually get into a cartoonish fight and turn into big clowns. The old man has a weird metal apparatus attached to his pelvic region and at the end of it (it's really huge, like a crane) is a regular ol' hot dog lmao. He chases B with this, trying to poke him with it, and ends up chasing him into a gigantic pit. B falls all the way down into some really soft dirt with worms all in it. From way above, the worms just look like crushed up pieces of ramen noodles lol. But once the camera zooms down, they are giant meal-worms, flipping around everywhere. B is still a clown and is angrily shaking his fist and yelling.

Had another dream about the nasty parasites from my last entry..

This time I'm getting out of bed (maybe a false awakening?) and notice my big toes feel funny, especially the left one. I look down and it is transforming into one of the parasites! I'm instantly freaked out of course. There are little legs coming off the sides and the end has a head protruding from it. As I walk into the living room each step brings pain from that toe and a tingly sensation from the other one. I sit down at the computer to look up what to do about it and as I glance again at my toe I notice my walking has crushed the head of the bug and its blood is pooling beneath my skin creating a big purple bubble of disgustingness. I'm almost relieved that it could possibly be dead, but horrified that there's a large dead bug INSIDE my freaking flesh, oozing its goop out everywhere. My other toe starts to have twinging pains in it and I think the second bug is growing in there.

Bleeehhhhh so disgusting..

Luckily I went on to have some DEILDs filled with adult fun. Definitely helped de-stress me! If I'd woken directly up from the parasite dream I'd probably be having a shitty day.. lol

-seeing myself in a mirror with short hair like a few years ago, drinking dr.pepper while wearing my dr.pepper shirt; start to notice hair poking out above my shorts and I take off my shirt to find that my chest and belly are covered in thick, brown hair. I'm distraught, realizing I have more hair than most men. I can't freaking believe I didn't get lucid from this.. wtf lol

-hanging out at my house with a group of cool people. I only recognize one, LC. We're all drinking alcohol and there are alcoholic cookies in the fridge. LC is eating a whole lot of them and asks me to get her some more. I end up forgetting about her and eating the rest of the cookies by myself in the kitchen.. lol. The cookies were star-shaped, really soft and sugary with a multicolored pattern and had little smiley faces made of black candy goop. I remember the flavor vividly, which is odd for a non-lucid for me.

- Doing weird stretching maneuvers alongside my Dad in a severely cramped water tank; getting scared and claustrophobic. Talking about psychological "dream tests" involving my Dad and my old step-dad, B. We're in a small, white facility with a small crew of very nice professional people.

- At a drunk pool party at an old house with lots of people. The only person I know there is R, my old friend and coworker. Lots of insignificant stuff happens. The next morning I'm still wide awake ready to party and everyone else is either gone, passed out on couches or wandering around like hungover zombies. R wakes up and is mad at me for something I didn't actually do. She slaps me very gently, then gives me a hug. We sit down and I explain myself. She doesn't apologize for slapping me, which I think is rude. I leave and start down the road which is on a hill. I start jogging, trying to find R again now for some reason. I feel like we're playing tag or something. I suddenly realize I'm in the middle of a somber procession of sorts. There's an old man with a camera who is being very patient with me, telling me I need to leave and get out of the way in a very gentle tone. I can tell he is annoyed inside though, and rightfully so. I look at the field of grass along the road and see that there's a wedding going on. I run back up the hill and actually pass two guys riding bikes. One's a young shirtless redhead with an ugly-ish face and the other seems to be his dad. I can't help but giggle as I pass them up. The dad records this with his phone. As we top the hill, they pass me and turn left into a driveway. They go inside and I follow. I ask the dad to send the video to my phone, then remember I don't have one. I try to tell him C's number but things get confused and I never finish it.

- Messing with a "memorial" crime scene, then realize "these are pieces of evidence, what am I doing touching them!?!?" and run off.

I remember "waking up" in bed. Light from morning is coming in the window. As I get out of the covers I notice that all my fingernails are bare except my thumb, even though I painted them just last night. I think to myself that this is really odd, but I don't think to RC because I believe the paint got rubbed off on the covers. Dangit..