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    Potagee pizza in the psych ward #16

    by , 05-01-2015 at 08:49 PM (674 Views)
    Went to sleep around 10pm. WBTB at 0300.

    Driving a van at night with J.G. He is sleeping and I am very tired. I pull over into a ditch and make him switch with me. He is pissed. The music auxiliary cord gets disconnected and I have to redo it.

    3rd person: teenage girl is with her older boyfriend feeling in love and vulnerable. They are in a dimly lit, empty warehouse. To distract herself from her fears she begs him to have sex with her. "I've been practicing! The last guy I was with T-boned me and I've been doing yoga!" I assume T-boning refers to a perpendicular type of angle. They have sex and their genital anatomy is a little strange. She starts bleeding because of the hard angle.

    I am at a baby shower of an overweight woman who has already given birth. It takes place in a small garden room. She is laying on a couch with her baby. A young man by a plastic picnic table is rubbing his girlfriend's chest in between her small breasts as some kind of PDA. She is really pretty and her body type reminds me of E.J.T.

    At my gma's with E.J.T and my sister. Sister and gma are arguing about religion. I have a mini notebook of E's that has a commandment written on the back. I say, "Yeah but the bible says a lot of stuff that's..." she nods in agreement. Gma is very curt with sister and they continue to argue. I yell, "Just get a long already. Jesus Christ!" I start cracking up and everyone but gma starts laughing about the irony of using god's name in vain while promoting religious tolerance. I feel a little bad for offending my gma.

    I am admitted to SMMH psych ward along with another older man. A male worker is giving us a simple orientation. I laugh at something he says about the room numbers being common sense. Then he comes up to me and says, "I mean, look at her. She hasn't even been here for a couple of hours and she's already flirting with everyone. She's just like the rest of them." An expression of astonishment and disbelief comes across my face. Did he assume my giggling was flirting? I realize that he's just taunting me, trying to get a rise out of me and thus non-responsiveness is the best response. I put on my poker face and contemplate about how I'm going to put all of this in my dream journal when I wake up. I go to the common area where we will do a group activity. There's a young man there doing art in his notebook. He wants to show me. It looks like a talented drawing of the earth but he's doing it by drawing random "Potagee Pizzas" (AKA - random, colored-in blobs). I say, "Portuguese pizza?" "Why do you say it like that?" He asks. "Because I'm haole." I respond. He points to himself, letting me know that he's white as well. "I wasn't raised speaking pidgin so it's weird of me to try and speak it now. It's just weird." I say. A local girl in front of me looks at me and nods her head in agreement. I ask for a pen because I want to get started on my dream journal right away so I don't forget anything. I accidentally grab a red one. I get up to the bathroom and the male worker says, "Did I hear a bathroom door?" He comes up to me and leads me to a more isolated bathroom. He enters with me, clearly with the intention of having sex with me. I continue to stare at him emotionless. He gets flustered and says, "Maybe she isn't like all the others. You know what, I forgot my badge in here somewhere." He then stands in the corner and talks to himself about what to do next. I sneak out and make hand gestures to the older, new admission to come with me. I see my husband in the nurses station and gesture to him, too, but he's confused. I yell for him but it's difficult to yell and I feel short of breath. Eventually he comes. My plan is to go back into the bathroom alone and play along with the worker until my posse comes in and catches him in the act.
    Later I get transferred to a facility where the sexes are separated. I pass the male side and there are two big, scary looking local guys making sexual gestures at me. One of them is doing so with a shake-weight. I enter the woman's area and there is only one young woman there. She's sitting in the dark at a table smoking a cigarette. "Who the fuck are you?" She asks. "I'm a worker, student, intern or something. Actually, I think I'm a resident but I get special priveliges because my husband works here." I respond. "That's why you get the new room. Isn't it smaller, though?" She asks. "I'm not actually sure." I answer. Her room was large and the bed was so big that the foot of it actually wrapped around a wall corner. I went into my room and it was smaller. I only had a twin sized bed and an unmade sleeper sofa.

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    Updated 05-02-2015 at 12:40 AM by 70665

    lucid , non-lucid