The Dream Journal

I'm in the kitchen at night. My laptop is on the kitchen table, I look outside through the window, I want privacy, is anyone out there? I close the blinds and head off to bed. I feel an odd stirring. Am I sleeping? I feel as if I'm leaving my body. I try to scramble to my bed, if I can get there I can keep this up and enter lucidity. (???)

I hear a crash. I get up from my bed and now I'm in my childhood home. I see my old friend from school has somehow gotten in and he has two younger friends with him. They are all drunk. I ask him what does he think he's doing?!? My mom is going to call the cops immediately if she wakes up to this! He doesn't care, too drunk to really know what's going on. I think he is so drunk he has come here by mistake, he lives a floor lower. (he didn't in real life)

I try to shoo them out but the enter the living room, my friend is in the process of passing out on the bed there. I get angry and frustrated at this whole thing, I try to put my foot down and get them to go. Right when I get my friend and the other young guy out, one of them has made his way to the balcony and is lighting a cigarette. I tell him to really leave now, this is absolutely unbelievable. He stares at me with drunk apathy trying to light his cigarette. He's pretty big and I know I can't force him to go physically. I leave, just muttering "unbelievable" under my breath.

The other guy leaves and finally with all of them out I close the door and make sure it is locked. I pull on the door a few times to make sure. I see a whole crew of people are there sitting in the stairwell. I really don't want them there making noise but at least they are not inside the apartment. There is a window along the left of the door and I can see out of it (there wasn't one in real life) and as I look out I see they are all showing me the finger and laughing. I try to just make my way to bed.

My mom didn't wake up and I suddenly see my sister there. She must have sneaked in. She isn't too drunk or anything. I tell her about Ale and stuff, I say his parents are so rich they rented the place under ours for him and he must have made a mistake. Our old cat is on my sister and she get up. I pet her and watch her walk around the mattress, I try to be gentle with her. I pet her and she walks towards my mom's bed.

A vague memory of a dream where I leave my mom's laptop at a friend's place, how will I get it back?

Mess at Lidl
I go to a Lidl. It looks different than usual, the cashiers are on a different level. As I approach it I see it is almost empty, no customers, and police are everywhere. I peek in and say are the registers open, I have things I want to pay for. They say yes and I go and pay. I have groceries that will cost about 10 bucks, I don't have any more money. She is checking out a lot of stuff and the total is going over 40. Did I take too much? I'm going to have to remove a lot of items. I realize that the cashier has rung up stuff from other people behind me into my tab. They are miserable, middle-aged men there who bought lots of fancy food items and are aggravated at the inconvenience. I try to be very happy and relaxed so the checkout woman doesn't feel too stressed.

The Cat's Voluntary Fast to Kill the Worms
I'm in an apartment I don't recognize, my mom lives there? I see a cat in front of me, there is a bathroom to my left. I'm told the cat is on a voluntary fast it won't eat, to kill some worms it has in its intestines. It's like I can see into the cat with x-ray vision. I see two massive worms in white in its intestines. I'm told they are so large that if they got out they could fight a mouse and win. I smell that the cat has some poop stuck on its butt fur. I should remove it but I'm afraid of getting the poop on my fingers and getting worms too.

Outside getting Taunted
It's night time I'm by my mom's place on a forested walking path by a bench. I'm walking to a female friends place. I see a group of hooded guys, I pull my hood up so they wouldn't bother me. I try to walk by but they taunt me, one kicks me in the ass. I yell out and tell him to watch it and the whole group laughs at me. I turn, getting real angry and I wake up. In the blurriness of waking up I see one of the guys, his back turned to me, as if he's looking at the book shelf. I focus and see nothing.

Gun Religion
I'm inside a central bus station, a little kid asks for cigarettes, he says I look like the type of guy that would have counterfeit Malrboros. (?!?) I have a leather jacket on. I tell him not to even start, it's going to be a thing he'll regret for life. I walk into the bus.

It's morning, sun is rising like the summer, I'm out to the east of the city. I'm walking on the sidewalk by the highway. It's so early there is no one around. I walk and I'm approached by two people, they have darker skin, they look Indian, and have good clothes on, like Mormons. They approach me and I decide to be polite and listen. They tell me to go and watch a movie at their place that will change my life. I'm about to tell them I know enough about Jesus but being too polite I go with them.

I'm in their place, it's like a basement with windows by the edge of the wall and the ceiling. It is well furnished. I watch a movie that starts with a map of the world when all the continents were still together, and shows how people first emerged in the center of the landmass and as the continents were torn apart people were sent around the world. That can't be right, I think, the two things happened in way different times.

The video shows how different cultures emerged in different places, the first cultures. What is the point of this video? Is this even Christianity?!? I look around and see cardboard cutouts and posters of people with guns in weird outfits, are these pro-gun religious people?

In the kitchen a hippie woman has made homemade ginger ale, it isn't too sweet and has lots of fibrous strands in it. I like it and compliment it to her.

Giant Bugs
I'm in my friends old place, the summer morning sun is coming through the windows. The place is mixed with a summer cabin, I see a wooden wall. There are giant mosquitoes flying around. I have to kill them for him. I have a giant ax and I try to kill them. Right as I swing at one I stop, this is going to cause holes in the walls. I look at the ax and the blade is actualyl flat, it's like a hammer with a really small face. I can use it without wrecking the walls.

I see some taxidermy-ed mosquitoes around, proud trophies.

????
Goofy and Pluto are kicked off the spaceship that has the rest of humanity escaping the end of the world. (who are all characters from Donkey Kong Country). It looks like an old-school sci-fi craft. As Goofy pleads to be taken in, they take Pluto in but then kick the dog out so Goofy doesn't have to die alone. They give him four cigarettes as sympathy. The spaceship launches away, Goofy and Pluto with four cigarettes sitting on the sofa of my childhood home.

Vague image of huts in the Pacific during World War II where each hut has a secret marijuana bush that then causes the hut to burst in flames?!?!?

I'm in the city on a cold winter day, I see snow around. I make it to the modern art museum. I'm supposed to go on a cruise with a couple I haven't seen in years. They really want me to go and tell me they will pay for it. The woman goes away and I'm with the guy, he has darker tanned skin and pretty heavy metal. As I follow him I see a female friend I know mostly through another couple I know. I try to wave to her but it's like she doesn't see me. She is person that does a lot of things with culture circles, she is talking to a foreign male friend who also has dark skin. Did she ignore me or just not notice me? I continue walking.

Inside the hall of the modern art museum, or around the corner of it I play a game like Galaga on a small screen. We play together with him giving advice. I mess up and start taking damage. They guy yells out and I apologize. As I continue to play I ignore his advice to the most part and try to get a feel for the game through trial and error like I usually do. He keeps on yelling at me, saying how I messed up so bad and that I suck at this game and I'm losing. I tell him it's just a game but he keeps on hounding me. I get up and leave, I don't have to take this kind of abuse.

I'm by the registers in a large grocery store. There are no windows or anything. The registers remind me of the store near my friend's old place but the store is much larger in the dream. I'm sitting on the floor with my back against the wall. Pinhead from the Hellraiser movie comes up to me. To my left. on my bag, there is a small Cenobite idol, it's like a bust but made of geometric forms, dark but abstract. Pinhead wants it and I give it to him. In return he give me a Barbie doll, the chest is all melted and burnt, the hair is in splotches. I think it's a Cenobite Barbie maybe? She looks burnt and hurt, a burn-victim Barbie.

Outside the modern art museum at night, I walk in the snow, it's much warmer now, the snow is slushy. I walk, looks like the courtyard of my childhood home but I don't recognize it as such. Going to meet my mom?

I'm in a McDonald's near my mom's place, I try to be really polite to the cashier person. I see that there is a special Big Mac deal, two meals for 7 bucks. Not sure I can eat that much. I go up to her and try to be really nice, I smile a lot. I try to order something that is really easy for the kitchen to make. Despite it, I go with the vegetarian wrap, since I'm a vegetarian. In my wallet, I find enough to pay for it.

Later, on a bridge near my childhood home, bright and cold outside, as if I phase through the bridge?!?

Crazy Brother Attacking Us
I'm in a house, it is fairly large and modern looking. It is dark inside, it's night, but there is some light coming from little cracks in doors and from streetlights shining through windows. I'm in trouble. I'm with a woman I don't know, she is my age, and her brother has gone insane and is attacking us. We have lost him as we ran away through a hall leaving him behind. I try to think of a way to lock him in a room to trap him. I close a bug heavy door like something in a bomb shelter, thinking he is trapped in the room ahead of me.

The woman leaves, trying to escape just in case. I stay behind. The brother appears, he is a skinny and crazy looking guy. He attacks me and he feels very weak. I put him in a sleeper hold and keep on squeezing, I know I have to kill him, it is the only way he won't chase us. I keep him in the hold, squeezing really tight, feeling very sad that I'm killing the guy. I sense that he too knows why this has to happen, or I try to explain it to him? At the last moment I let him go, I can't do it, the guilt would destroy me.

He's limp on the floor, unconscious but still alive I think. I reason to myself, he must be alive. It is now daytime, morning. The sister is now there as well with a mutual friend of ours (not in real life but in the dream). Now that things have calmed down we can relax. I see the brother's jacket, a red college jacket, and the pocket is full of cigarettes, reds. I join the sister on the bed, what a crazy night.

Old Apartment
I'm in my childhood home. I'm in the stairwell, it is a summer day, I see the golden sun shining through the windows. I get up to our floor. I see they have put a new outdoor entrance to the right where the stairs are. That will be convenient but how did they build it? We are on the second floor!

The Doorman at the Club. Meeting Trump
I enter a dingy club in a far-off part of town. It's evening, a grey day. I go up the stairs until I reach the jacket check-in. The light is a stained, dirty type coming from dirty fluorescent lamps overhead. I see a doorman by the jacket racks. I say hi and he tells me to check in my jacket. I'm reluctant to but I confidently give it to him. I'm weary a very fine leather jacket and I take it off and give it to him. He says that the door charge is 7.50. I have a wallet full of money so I pay him with a 10, asking for a receipt, I'm on business. Am I meeting Donald Trump?!? I tell the doorman I haven't been to this club in years. It has really been run into the ground, I think to myself.

On the Hood of a Car
Suddenly I'm on the hood of a car. It is a grey day, looks like a place out further from the city. I think the car passes a McDonald's. The car suddenly stops and I almost fly off the hood, I'm just able to stay on. The guy who is driving it, a friend of mine, a guy my age (but who I don't know in real life) apologizes he had to stop to avoid hitting someone. He turns to the right and starts accelerating. I notice he is now on a road leading to the highway. Uh oh. I look to my right and see a man yelling, what am I doing?!?! I see the ground is raised by to the right of the road, I try to find a place to jump off. We pass under a small overhead bridge made of concrete. On the column to the right I see someone had made a 3D picture of the Illuminati symbol, very impressive. Street art?





Stop at the Machine Shop
It's dark, could be late afternoon, the sun sets so early. I'm at the machine shop. I see many rooms in there, lots of people I don't know. A woman who works there has dreadlocks now? Even has a tab of a can in it. Weird. I see the actual dreaded hippie person who works there. She is about to go for a cigarette. I go outside, circle around the back of the shop where the cargo bay is. I see my boss there, I flag him down and tell him about the model I made for him. He is excited but I get carried away and as I follow him to his office asking for more details he is obviously annoyed. I try to tie my questions up and leave to not annoy him anymore.

It feels like I'm back in the big house from the beginning, a fancy modern building in the night, in the kitchen, the lights are on. The kitchen is large. I stand there with my own sister and a friend of mine I know a little bit. I talk to him, I think my sister is pushing me to, asking why we don't know each other that well. He seems to feel awkward about the question. He says he has always tried to be social with me. I tell him I know him quite well to be honest, more than others.

I wake up with some very distinct images of dreams I had, thinking to myself "at least I have a dream for my Twitter account!" I fell asleep and *boom* all is lost. Dreaming is so fickle...

In a Boat Terminal
I get off a cruise with a bunch of my friends. As we are in the hall I begin to feel as if they never really liked me, I was never a real part of the group, I wasn't even invited to many of their weddings. I see they have printed a year book and I flip through it. My picture is in it, I see it black and white, I'm sitting on a cushy chair with a denim vest like I was a kid, I look really good in the picture. I see other friends who also had denim vests. Despite it, I still feel a strong sting of rejection that puts me in a sullen mood.

I am in an old part of the city, the walls are stone bricks as are the roads, I see a hill across the road where I think I make out a small park with trees. I'm walking to my mom's car with her and my sister. I realize I left my friend behind and tell my mom I'll be back my midnight. I wave at her and say bye as she leaves with my sister. I hope she is ok with it. I walk inside a large building behind me, it's night time, looks like an old apartment building. Inside it is a boat terminal for cruise ships. The lighting is overbearing and intense as it usually is. I see my ex girlfriend and my other friend from before. It is awkward, they don't seem to get along.

Suddenly it's a hotel? I go down a corridor and see rooms, mine is right in the beginning of the hall to the right. The room has a window to the far wall and only one little lamp on, the lighting is less intense. It sort of looks like a cabin you'd find in a cruise ship. I go down the hall, I see my old girlfriend and her friend who has dreadlocks. I look into a mirror and see I have dreadlocks now, I try to tie them into a bun awkwardly. It is not easy and I fail a few times.

I turn around, my ex is in trouble. I run to the room at the end of the hall. The large window to the far wall is letting in grey daylight. I see she is on the bed. There is an assassin after her. I look in the room for the assassin and notice a suspicious lump under the sheets. I attack it and the assassin engages me, wrapping her legs around my ribs and pressing hard, I feel my ribs compress, even snap?!? She is a woman in her mid forties. I push her off but she continues to poke me hard and it hurts. The pain is surprisingly real. She flees, I'm not too wounded, I think.

Middle of Nowhere Waiting for a Bus
I'm in a small town at night, by a small road that winds past a residential area with little houses. I wait for a bus to get me back to the city, I see a bus come up. A person runs to it, a red-haired friend of mine. He doesn't recognize me though, and as I look at him his features become unfamiliar and strange.

In the bus, there are other people. The scene has changed, it is now daytime, morning, and a grey sky stretches over the field we pass to my right, a deep forest to the left. I look suspiciously at the people around me. I see a young guy with a buzzcut a little ahead of me. He's a troublemaker, been in a juvenile facility for a while I hear. There is some confusion, was he put in there as an innocent kid and the place has now turned him into a thug?

Playing Cards
I'm in an old apartment of a female friend of mine, she lived in a place similar to the one I was waiting for the bus in. The sky is grey, I can see the ambient grey light coming from the windows on my left. She has a bunch of Magic:The Gathering cards that she takes pictures of and puts on Imgur. She gets a lot of likes and makes it to the front page. I find it weird that she now collects these cards, but I rationalize it by thinking she likes the artwork. She shows a card she really likes, a black card called "Tombic Totem" (a nod to Hearthstone I believe) and says she actually understands the English name of it. I look at the card and it has a little picture of a pedestal with a skull and a candle where the text should be. It has a game mechanic called "candle" where if the candle goes out it silences (another Hearthstone mechanic) all other cards and relights. Whenever the candle is "blown out" it silences a card.

I'm out back in the backyard of a house at night. There is a fence around the grass,there is a small tent by the house. A bunch of rowdy working class people smoke cigarettes and drink tall cans of beer. I sit by a table under the roof of the tent. A friend of mine is playing Magic. I join and play. We get into a tie and have to draw instant cards and the one with the highest cost wins. We draw twice before the third breaks the tie in his favor. To my left I see an old friend who has come back from Germany. He as a lot of shiny foil special lands on the table. They look really nice, I point out one that looks like it has a hologram picture on it. I ask about it, I think I see C'thulhu on it? The cards are so precious I don't even want to touch them, my friend turns it around for me to look at it upright. The sunken city of R'lyeh?

I dream a comment I made on Reddit get close to 10,000 upvotes. How is that possible?!?!?

Going Back in Time
I'm in a hotel room, like a motel in the US. I look down at my cellphone. In some weird twist, I go back in time. Now it is a day before. My friend enters the room, stands by the door and tells me to get my stuff together. I look down back at my phone, confused. It is now an old version of a cellphone, like from the 90's and the screen is so small it's hard to read messages. I try to fight my lethargy and get going.

Back in the military, Inception crew?!?!?
I'm in my childhood neighborhood. The sun is up, feels like an autumn morning. I am walking around, looks nice. I'm back in the military? I have to match. At some point I have to run, it's like a orienteering exercise. I really don't want to run, haven't ran in some time. To my surprise it is very easy and I actually enjoy it.

I make it to a bridge going over a highway, there are trees on either side. Were am I supposed to go?

I'm in a tight alley in the city, the walls on either side are tall and obscure the sky. I'm driving a car haphazardly, my mom is in it as well. It suddenly turns into something like a bike, the pedals are confusing. My old friend from childhood and his wife (who I by pure coincidence bumped into today) pass on their own motorized bike.

I make it to the center of the city by the sea. I meet the crew from Inception (!?!). They have stolen a nuclear reactor and have hidden it under some paving rocks by the sidewalk, through the cracks I can see it glow with white light.

The Yale Admission Tent
I enter a large white tent like something you'd find in a wedding. There is a a massive amount of people in the benches behind me as I face two tables. They are the Yale admission board (?!?!) and this is the interview portion of the admissions process. It has the feel of a game show or a talent show, the audience behind me. I'm pretty sure I have no chance of getting in but since I've been thrust in this position, I'll just do my best as least not to embarrass myself. I put on my best outgoing persona and get ready for anything.

On the table to the left there is a bunch of people who look like administrators. They shuffle my papers and prepare to ask questions. A person walks up from the table next to it, on my right. It is reserved for students in the student union who also are a part of the admission interview. A fairly plump and young student walks up to me and asks what books I've read recently. A sting of panic hits me, I haven't really read anything notable in the last few months, at least no fiction. I try to stir up anything I've read. I mention a friend of mine gave me the Lord of the Rings book that I've been re-reading as an emergency lie. I also mention reading the Song of Ice and Fire books, waiting for The Winds Of Winter as a namedrop. This is not going well.

I approach the student union table. I see my report card from school on it, it looks dirty and tattered, as if it's been stepped on with muddy boots.Behind it there is a circle of young students sitting on the grassy ground. They begin asking me weird, pretentious riddles (like something I saw in a Gilmore girls episode) and I do my best to answer but think it's BS.





Back in my childhood home, I'm hungry for tortilla chips. I eat tortilla chips.

Only disjointed elements in memory.

A vague memory of wondering if I'm asleep or not. (!) As to what I did afterward, nothing remains.

I see an old friend from school, he is by a large house at night in the yard. Candles in lanterns light the yard. We go inside, there are some of his friends in there, young women. He mentions that he can show his back if it really is something people want to see, as if someone asked him to show it. I think he just made it up to be able to have an excuse to show off a tattoo. He takes his shirt off. I see a disgusting, long wart protrude from his side. I think I get a glimpse of a light green tattoo but it is really small.

Waking up on a mattress on a floor, I'm with a female friend of mine and her brother. We are all waking up, the light in the kitchen has an orange-sepia tone to it. Her brother complains that someone was drilling in the night and it woke him up. He says he was the only one to wake up to it. I don't remember waking up. I am a very sound sleeper.

The Asian Restaurant
I approach a Chinese restaurant in a town where I spent my childhood, I look at the towns distinctive white architecture. It is in a weird place, by a forested park by the edge of the old shopping center. The day is a clinical grey one. I look at it, it looks interesting and unfamiliar, I see a blue neon sign. I enter it and meet a friend of mine and his girlfriend. I haven't seen them in a long time. The restaurant is small and has a long table in the center of it made of wood.

My friend hands me a passport he said he found on the ground, saying there's something creepy about it. I open it and see that there is only a picture of our mutual friend in it with his name next to it and the issuing date that it Feb 1900. the rest of the pages are blank. How can that be? I look through the rest of the pages, they are blank until I begin to notice other pictures in it, other people. How odd it is.

We order some sushi and eat it. I remember having some cash with me for a change and remember I have at least 17 bucks on me, it can't go over that I think to myself. The friend who was in the passport picture is also there now. We eat and I go outside as everyone went out to talk. I ask my friend how much the bill came out to and he says 90. I'm shocked, how could it be that expensive? That would mean I'd have to give him like almost 40 (in my dream calculation of it). I don't have that much, I wasn't ready to even give him all of the money I had. I give all of the 17 bucks to him and say shamefully that I'll have to owe him. He seems cool with it and to my relief says that the money I gave him covers my portion. I talk to his girlfriend, she smiles and is very nice.

The Wrestling Match
I'm at a show wrestling match. By the entrance where the wrestlers come in I hear someone call to me, I look up and see an opening over the entrance, an older man tells me to climb up to him. I climb a rope up to the opening in the wall that leads inside to another room. I look down and see how high up I am. I get scared and try to swing into the room. I succeed and feel relief. I follow the older man down the hallways backstage. He tells me it is obvious I just got lucky and had sex. I smile awkwardly and tell him "why hide being happy?". I feel confident and relaxed.

We enter a cafeteria, it is well lit and looks like a school. It gets blurry, do I sit down with him? I think I see a Tunisian girl I knew in upper secondary. In an unclear transition I'm sitting in a machine shop. I'm surrounded by people who work there. Some of them are being pretty rude, laughing and not listening to anyone. They leave and someone in charge asks what can be done to improve conditions around the shop. I speak up, saying respect for others has to start improving. I also want to mention problems I have with another machinist. I then notice he's there right in front of me. I feel tense but continue, saying that he has to stop being so hard to work with.

In The Afterlife
Somehow the scene transforms. Everything looks similar but we are all now in an auditorium with a blackboard in front. A person in front says we are all in the afterlife now, we are all dead. We are going to be sent to the past/future to help save the world? The person writes down 4291.6 on the blackboard. This is the year we are going to. The person asks if there are any questions. A murmur springs up in the crowd and I raise my hand. I try to get my voice heard, I find an opportunity and say I have a lot of metaphysical questions I'd like to ask.

As people file out of the auditorium I go next to the person who was holding the briefing, she is a pastor. My mind is racing with questions, there is so much to ask? How will we interact in the world of the living? What happens now? I start by asking who goes to the afterlife, adding that it probably Christians since she is a pastor but when I see the Tunisian girl there passing us in the hall I correct myself by saying it must be people from the Abrahamic religions? She says everyone goes to the afterlife when they die, there is now division. She mentions that she saw the Buddha in a park some time before. I say that it's great that everyone gets to come here. I make a mental note to look for the Buddha in the park after the mission.

I enter a room that looks like a dining hall in a cruise ship. There is a stage in the front, far off to the right I see windows that give a little light to the otherwise shadowy room. I see people in military outfits, does this have something to do with what is going to happen, the mission? I see a stern older man in a military dress uniform, he looks almost like a fascist. People begin singing a song that is very traditional and nationalistic. I sing along, I see a woman is making sure everyone sings along. If it wasn't for her, I wouldn't sing at all, not good at it.