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    Crazy

    by , 04-26-2024 at 02:42 AM (80 Views)
    Is this website dying? seems no one DJ's here after the spring competition...

    On the last entry: The "drive by". I heard the Jamie voice in my head apologize for that or something. No! It's okay. I go stir crazy sometimes trying to figure how "real," what I am experiencing is. To show up on the day I post about something distressing... Nah, you threw me a line girl! Thanks.

    BTW if Jamie reads these. Because of my situation at home, my cousin just offered me a room in Lethbridge, I can get my old job back, I'm on 3 delivery apps, and i have the basic skills to start a side business. You KNOW how mentally unhealthy my family is. It's triggering for me here. I understand I was put here for now, to be closer to your area, for a reason. I'll hold out for as long as I can. But, if it gets really bad here. I gotta run. I'll let ya know. I'd hate to because it seems like a phenomenal amount of progress has been made between us.

    Anyway dreams:

    Jamie is crazy

    FA, get out of bed and I see it's hailing out and there's a big storm (It's also night time.) I don't think to RC. I hear my brother say he hopes Jen makes it home okay. I hear a crash and I hear Jamie's voice from the kitchen say, "Rob, come look!" I run into the kitchen and see Jamie (As Jen) standing behind my dad. There's an acoustic guitar smashes over him. Parts of the wood are stabbed inside his body and the strings are cutting him. He's awake but makes no sound. I keep asking, "Um Should I call an ambulance?" Jamie keeps saying while grinning, "No, I think he'll make it."

    Remind me to NEVER really piss Jamie off... my god.

    Work

    I'm working in some large building with storeys. I'm new, but everyone is wearing Wal-Mart vests. I see Jamie as a different girl. and the nametag says, "Julie," I have false memories, of working in another town with a girl that looked like her name ,"Julia.". Jamie's eyes widen in fear and she runs past me. Her friend (The one I met at the metal party at the airstrip in didsbury.) says something like, "Oh I think she likes you. Just let her make all the moves on you, she will." and I'm like, "Okay, i'm pretty shy with that stuff anyway so it's nice when someone else takes initiative." But in the middle of the sentence the girl I'm taking to is replaced by a chubby woman with grey hair. She yells at me, "Stop talking and get to work."

    bed


    FA, Jamie and her friend walk into my bedroom. I see Jamie as Katelynn now (Great now my perception of her is off again). I'm like, "I haven't seen you in so long we should have a hug." (knowing it's really Jamie.) Jamie goes to hug me in bed but turns around and I hug her from behind. Her behind is literally on my you know what again. But her friend drags her off the bed an out of the room. (note: In addition to the voice, While going to sleep or waking up in the middle of the night or early morning. There is a phantom sense of Jamie with me. I experience hugs, and other things. And I have read other "Twin Flames" have gone through this as well. While I think I'm going crazy, I do find it comforting.)

    Last night.

    Two brief flashes


    In one Jamie is prancing some other guy around in front of me. I start getting mad and Raven says something like, "She just needs healing"

    in the second Flash. I'm watching peaceful energy go over Jamie. Her vacant, glassy eyes become whole again. She looks at me and smiles. and we grab our hands together.
    CaesarVD likes this.

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    Tags: dad, jamie, wal mart
    Categories
    non-lucid

    Comments

    1. Lang's Avatar
      Is the site dying? I don't know.. SOME of us update the DJ privately, so you may not see them. Or like me, they have been having issues with Internet, lately.
    2. theshirecat's Avatar
      I know I've had some issues with the site loading sluggishly, but mostly I've just been slacking on DJ'ing
    3. CaesarVD's Avatar
      Yeah something has been up with the site for sure, I had to use a different browser because I couldn't make it past the Cloudflare verification