Lucid-schizo-dreamer

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

Watching a sci-fi show on tv which also has knights of some secret society with some ancient connection with bees. One of the knights who runs their missions, accesses some kind of cave and tastes the honey as a kind of ritual to consult the higher powers and through some trance or something, he receives info on the knights faiths and missions. Fast forward to present days, some traditional village up on some mountains gets attacked by bees and some detectives that deal with out of the ordinary cases go check it out. They find people who seem to have tried to hide indoors, in cellars, in wells, but they are all dead. But there is one survivor and I become him and I relive the story.
So I noticed some small animal, a foal I think, finding a bee's nest by accident and being attacked. Then the swarm moves on and passes in front of the window through which I am watching the scene. I go to the next door to warn people of the swarm of bees flying around, and they say they had also noticed another swarm somewhere nearby. Then I try to leave, but notice that the bees seem to be chasing people down the street and then spot me and change direction towards me. I run back to this house and tell people to hide and cover their body for protection. They think they're safe inside but the houses are very old, poorly insulated and here are small openings on the sides of the doors and windows, through which they can come in. We hide in the horse stable, hoping the smell of the animals hides our own smell, because I am paranoid that they can smell us, and we cover ourselves in coats and blankets. But the bees come inside and spot us. The other are attacked and struggling to get rid of the bees, but I am the only one who manages to run to another room and close a door that is a bit more hermetic. Still, some bees follow me there and I fight to kill them. Then I manage to escape through a back door and go up the mountain. There is a fortified town up there, a touristic place, which I hope is safer. I go across the gates of the city walls, everything seems peaceful, tourists are walking around. I ask a couple guys about it and one says he heard something about some bees in the are, but no serious warnings, the other is oblivious, didn't hear a thing. But as I continue going inside the town, I hear screams and see people running down hill. Then I spot at least three people equiped with protection suits and carrying large pumps to spray inseticide. They are coming in formation, leaving a cloud of chemicals behind in order to kill a big swarm that is descending upon the town. People are running in every direction and I follow a couple that is taking a path towards maybe an entrance to the old fortified castle. I don"t see a way in, but they knock on a door and beg for help. The door opens and someone lets the three of us in. It is a small space like a storage room, with maybe 10 people inside in the dark. They close the door behind very slowly not to make noise and ask everyone to stay quiet. There is a small window to the right of the door and we can see to the outside, but even that they cover so we can't be seen. I notice that this place seems well sealed. No openings around the door frame or window, no lose shingles on the roof. Then some more people outside are begging for help but it is too late. If we open the door, the bees come in. Then silence and more silence. We take a look and we see no one and no bees. But we know they are out there. We wonder how long we can stay here without food or water. We don't know if the bees will leave or just keep waiting in the area. We worry if we'll ever come out alive.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

With Riverstone, Zilla and NightHawk watching the new Matrix movie, but it is an interactive and immersive experience, just like the scene in the movie itself where Bugs is walking on the simulated matrix. We have to walk around a room to see some scenes and at some point I am literally sitting in front of Carrie Ann Moss and some other actor, while they play a scene and she interacts with me and I become part of the movie. Every other spectator becomes so jealous. After the movie there is a festival outside, some kids play Jefferson Airplane's song and I am groovin. Then I spot some stupid men brutalizing an African lady with intention to rape her. I go intervene and kick some dude really bad. The others go look for reinforcements, so I gotta leave. What matters is the woman had time to escape. Then I try to blend in with the crowd. I am walking around anonimously until some Asian dudes point to me and say I look like JFK Jr and I am like ""OMG, crazy Q'anoners!!!" . I reply that I do not, in any way, shape or form, but if I did, it would be just random genetic resemblance, no need to even be from the same family. The point is, I realize I am also inside some kind of simulation and someone altered my avatar to look like JFK r and I didn't realize. I guess it's so they can spot me more easily.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

At some beach house with Riverstone and a couple of my cats and some friends, like Tânia. I hear that Jonh Blacksmith is also around and for some reason I am asked to accompany some kid to the place he s staying, to deliver a message. After doing so, I stay there to chat a little bit. But John is so very busy, going back and forth and in out of the room. Then he says he needs to go shower, but will come back, so I interpret that he wants me to wait. I stay but I fall asleep on his bed. I notice him coming in later on and getting dressed. He knows I am there but doesn't want to wake me up. He lookdearingly to me. I play with it and pretend to be on a light sleep and reposition myself to a cute sleeping pose. Then he goes out again and I think maybe he left because I was alseeep, so I get up to clear that up. I see myself in a mirror. I have a cute yellow ruffled dress and short hair, which all messy. So I tidy up a little bit and then he comes back again. He sees me picking up my stuff to leave, so he calls me on to stand in front of him and he says something nervously. I don't understand half of what he says but I feel the emotion in his words. He is saying that he loves me and wants to be with me and apparently he is free to do it. He starts crying like a baby, with snot in his nose and I also start crying and we embrace each other warmly. He points to inside the wardrobe and says something that I again have trouble understanding. I ask him to repeat and he says there is a portal in the wardrobe and we can jump through it and get out at some other place where someone he knows can marry us on the spot. I am like "Wait, no!" But some people we know start coming into the room to speak to him and they see him hugging me, so before they see my face and go spread the word about it, I agree to jump. So we jump. On the other side is a large room like an attic and there is some lady there. He explains that she can marry us right away and we can leave everything behind. That's when I get away from him and say "I am sorru but I can't, for better or for worse, I need to go back to my life." And all his plans shatter and I see all hope abandoning him. I loved our cathartic moment together, love the idea that we could have had it differently in a different life, but in this life it is not meant to happen.

I am friend or sister of Ana, who dates Christian Grey. One day she is helping me and Riverstone put stuff into our van and one of her exes passes by on the sidewalk with his snobbish new girlfriend. Ana says "Oh no!" when she sees them, but puts on a smile and says hello to them. The other woman mocks her, by saying she looks good but in a condescendent way. Ana plays it cool and says she is doing good. But the bitch laughs and replies "We can see you really moved up in life". We are really irritated, but we try not to bring up she is dating Christian because that would lowering to her level. In any case, I walk up to her and get my face near hers and say "Bitch, you have no idea. You'd be crying if you knew." She scoffs me off and they walk away. I know she'll eventually find out what I am talking about. Ana is about to get married to him and she'll be on every papparazzi magazine.
Then it's her wedding day and it is very bizarre. First we gather with some of his family in the UK, because his family is full of British nobility. They dress and behave funny, but all of them seem to be nice people. Christian finds Ana hiding in a corner, crying upset and wants to know what's going on. We tell him what happened some days before and how she is still struggling with it. He immediately wants to go confront the woman, but we talk him out of it. Instead we explain how it is to grow up poor, and no matter how much you work, you still never getting enough money to get out of poverty, and the anger that comes with it. And how it isn't remotely ok to shame others just because now you're rich, not due to any accomplishment, but just through marriage. First, because it ain't your money and second, because money should not define your worth in the eyes of anyone else. Therefore Ana is crying out of frustration because she wants to feel self worth for herself. Christian and a friend are listening to this attentively.
Then I leave them and join some other family members wbo are playing silly games. They say they are traditional and I mention they seem totally absurd. All the ladies, one by one, have to try to catch something that will be thrown, but it is not a bouquet, it can be anything else. I get hit by a cloud of sewing pins. I spend like an hour removing them from my chest and face. And even from some poor cat who got in the way when that happened. Then some other girl gets covered in darts, but she is ecstatic. I just think "What in the hell?"
Then there is a feast, but in the end there is so much wasted food, so I stay behind separating what is good to eat and compacting and separating packages for recycling, because I don't know if the servants will do so. I distribute wet bread outside in the garden for pigeons and other birds to eat, and I start putting packages of chips and other snacks in carton boxes and plastic bags and wondering how am I going to take this all on my plane trip back home.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

I am going to some fancy school and some day there is a concert there. The singer who was invited can't perform, so a couple people are pushed onto the stage to improvise and I am one of them. I sing a little bit and I feel like I killed it, but no one applauds. Then follows a guy who just can't sing at all, but all his friends cheer him up. This event is recorded and later broadcasted, but the video was edited to cut me off while this guy is still in it. I feel extremely upset that they cut me out, because this could have been my chance to be heard by many and I feel that I am surely hated by those who did this.
Then the school director calls me to her office and says that I'll be expelled, because I said I didn't like being hugged by random people and she contacted my psychologist who confirmed my aversion to being touched. I am appalled and tell her that makes no sense at all and they should respect my boundaries, not attack me over it. It seems everyone in school just wants to get rid of me, no matter what.

I am a good looking, rich and spoiled girl, but hated by all. I live in a giant family mansion and have my own quarters in the attic. I like to mistreat the servants. I have my own cinema in the basement. My family is in the movies industry and I feel pissed that they don't make me a star. Some guests come over for some preview and I decide to make a scene, by walking around the house in just lingerie and an open silk robe. Some guy becomes crazy obsessed with me. But I don't really care and I ignore all his attempts to approach me. But later, one day I am feeling horny and have no one else, so I invite him over to my attic. Someone knocks on the door but instead of him some guy claiming that his loving wife died in this house. That she was a servant there and somehow got electrocuted. But most weird is he claims her was never retrieved because she fell into some tank and her body got stuck into some plumbing. He asks me to please help him empty the tank and flush the pipes, but that would cause some kind of flooding with seward water in the garden. At first my reaction is to shut the door in his face. But then I feel compelled to help, mostly because I love the idea of causing a mayhem with seward on the garden. I do it and there is water flooding all around the house. It is so much and so fast that I end up having to rescue the family dogs from drowning in it, as they unexpectedly run outside when it starts.
I guess the guy retrieved his wife boy, because he is very thankful and then invites me for something he wants to show me. We join some of his friends and they take me to what appears to be an abandoned house. They touch a specific piece of carved wood on the door and the whole house exterior walls move like parts of a Rubik's cube and rearrange. A new type of door appears and opens up. Inside there is a large open room which looks like a museum, with ancient artifacts protected under glass displays. Then I hear a voice welcoming us. It is an alien, like a grey but human sized and slightly more human looking eyes. He wears long robes. He mentions some dagger, but before I even take a better look at it, he is already calling my attention to a giant book. The book levitates through the air and lands on my hands. He says it tells the story that explains it all. And the story is that Isaiah met an alien, who looked like this grey alien but had hair and some crown like thing like a cubic hat with jewels incrusted in the front, that was an actual part of her skull. And they had a son who looked like this alien without the crown thing and might actually be him. And he wrote this book, which has 14 volumes which are spread throughout the world, containing all the secrets of the universe.
After we leave, I go on a lifelong journey with these guys, living a simple life, walking, hiking, living like nomads, in a mission to find the other books.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

I am my current self but in my teenage body living at my parents house. They have adopted or at least are fosterimg some nordic teenager boy and I only know about it when he comes in to stay. He is supposedly a bit of a trouble, but I am very nice to him and he seems to respond well to that. He also has a black cat exactly like my cat Cuscus and they get on immediately, going around the house together and I think that's a good sign. I have to give the boy a tour. I show him my bathroom, that now is our shared bathroom and I find some adult man in there. My parents say it's ok, he is supposedly the father or tutor of the kid, which makes no sense to me. I thought the kid was an orphan. My parents say the man will be staying with us for a while too, until the kid is adapted. I tell him this bathroom is the kid's bathroom and the big one is for the adults and he says he likes this one better and ask if we can leave cause he is using it. I immediately dislike him and want him gone from my house. Then he tells me I should go help his son making breakfast. The kid goes in the kitchen and he is a bit lost. He is looking for the food and utensils and I kindly ask him what he needs and what he wants to eat. So far he is always humble, kind and thoutghtful when dealing with me. I believe we will be very good friends and I tell him that. Then his dad comes on and joins in eating bread with our margarine and immediately mocks it, saying he will bring real butter imstead of this crap. I tell him I am vegan and although my parents aren't, they are ok eating the stuff I buy without a problem. He shows disdain and I just want him gone again.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

I think I am in Brussels wiith some acquaintances. I learn that Sevelina has come out as gay and I am happy for her, but also wonder why she still doesn't talk to me.
We come accross a group of street performers, illusionists, and they are inviting people to join some indoor show nearby. I am dragged along with the group and we attend the show, which strangely involves computers. So their trick seems more like hacking than a magic trick and I am sure it is some scam. Also, only people without basic IT skills could not see through that. I sneak into their backstage to have a word with them and ask for a refund, but once they realize I am onto them, they disappear quickly through a back door and lock it. Then my friends join me and say the front door is closed, so we are basically trapped, After some struglle we knock one door down and look for them outside, but they are gone.

With an undefined friend, as a passenger in his car. We are in the middle of a forest. He calls Carlos, saying he leaves nearby, to ask if we can drop by. I say he doesn't want us there, because I had asked once if I could come for a visit and he had said no. But my friend is convinced he will not say no and after a long conversation on the phone, he manages to get a yes. But he only says he is bringing me along after the yes and I notice that Carlos gets upset. Not that he doesn't like me, on the contrary, but his wife is so very jealous of me. We drive there, it is an old palace covered in traditional Portuguese tiles, white and blue, depicting historical scenes. I am surprised. Carlos looks very tanned and fit, He is just wearing shorts, no shirt. His wife is a very average looking lady, short, with glasses and unnatractive hair, but she seems welcoming, or at least she is making an effort to be welcoming. There is something odd about how simple they look and the place they live in. They take us over a terrace with potted plants and a couple pets. They actually live in a much less fancy area of this palace and I realize they are the keepers and not the owners. Carlos is strangely being very open with me, very handsy and I fear that his wife might indeed get jealous. But so far, she keeps smiling. Then they takes us to the part of the palace which houses some foundation and a museum. I say I'd love to see the interiors and they take us first to inside the museum, not their home. There, I get lost from them in the visiting crowd. I bump into my friends Nuno and Ana, I say hi and they say hi back but they don't stop walking. I bump with them again further ahead and poke Nuno and say hi again. Again they reply but keep moving, looking a bit annoyed with my insistence, so I let them go. Then at some room is some minister presiding over some official ceremony and he adresses some navy officers and they salute. There are also some navy and army people outside, doing the museum tour and at that moment they all stop in their tracks to salute, leaving everyone else confused if they should wait or walk past them and carry on. The museum is very random and it has stuff about Portuguese navigators and explorers, but also some part about a dude who was an actor and decided at an old age to become a bullfighter and married some Spanish royalty lady and there are photos of their wedding and a real size photo of the lady in her wedding dress with a several meter long tail.

Now with Riverstone and some new friends, but I think I am still on that palace/museum, entering a new area that is a bit more surreal. I lose sight of them, and go from room to room looking for them and I find a kind of baby nursery, with a few different rooms for kids of different ages. Then end up at another room which is crowded. People are standing in a long line with bags, like an airport security check place. Suddenly I worry that I am not wearing a mask in the middle of this packed crowd, so I look for an exit. Outside I find myself in the city of Porto. Right in front of me on the sidewalk, I see a dog in need of help, but he growls when I approach him. So I let him go, feeling helpless. I call Riverstone on my phone but he doesn't answer. I feel left alone and angry that my friends didn't care for me and haven't even called in to check on me. Then I meet some tall handsome stranger who says he can get me out of here and I am curious, so I follow him. He takes me inside the facility I came from again, but to some different empty area with wild technology. He speaks to some bodyless voice that guides us through some procedure. Him and some other guys that just appeared there, put on some weird looking helmets. They look like legendary nordic warrior gods. They offer me one helmet too and say to stand by their side and that I might get dizy. And I do. I fall flat on my back and can't move, but I am aware. I feel one of the guys laying me down on some bed and making me comfortable, he touches my clothes and for a second I fear he might rape me, so I flinch and regain some control. He assures me it is ok and I trust. We all need to be in physical contact for some reason, so they interlace their feet with mine and for a few seconds I feel between worlds: I can feel my body laying in bed (real bed? or dream bed?) with them around me, but I also already see the other side, the street where I last was with my friends before we entered the palace/museum/whatever. Slowly I wake up there and I am laying on a bench and I spot my friends sitting on another bench. I wanna hug them, but I am also feeling angry. Riverstone says they looked for me, but the phones weren't working and they also got lost on that surreal place. I think he may be saying the truth. Then there is some kind of parade on the street in front of us. It is either some wedding or a funeral. It is festive but also gloomy and it is hard to distinguish. Night falls and I spot some lights in the skies. First is just a pair of orbs swirling, then they form shapes like minimalistic angels or fairies and one comes down straight at me. People in the parade freak out and run in all directions. I freeze, not knowing if this light thing will hit me like a lightning or not. But it just flies-by like saying hello to me or goodbye and up it goes and disappears and I feel it was the guys who brought me over to my reality, just saying goodbye before they leave.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

In Brussels, penniless and in pijamas on the street for some reason. I take the subway without a ticket. I just need to travel a couple stations to one where there is a public restroom I can use, but I come across a ticket fiscal and I exit abruptly in the wrong station. I don't risk going back, so I decide to walk.
Meet some folks at a park, one is my old school colleague Ana S. and she invites me to join them. Some guy is trying hypnosis on her, but she is not cooperating. Another person tells me she is highly anxious and this way she can't be healed. Apparently she has a problem with a horse that doesn't allow her to ride it and it is something with her that needs to be balanced so the horse will accept her. They offer me to come along with them on a boat ride down a river. They drop some dude at a university and I feel interested in joining him. I wonder if I can just drop by and look for work opportunities there. My friends provided me with some stuff and now I am carrying a trolley with a few items inside.
At the university, walking down a hall, I spot a small department library which must be related to men's reproductive health, because the sides of the shelves are all shaped like penises and it is hilarious. I take a couple photos with a phone I now have and some idiots come by complaining that I am not respecting the privacy and right to image protection of the people inside the library. I explain that I am only photographing the dicks, yet they still bother me. I go away and pass by the cafeteria. I am so hungry and I need a coffee and I am glad they have very cheap prices, like coffee for 35 cts and nice cakes and a variety of weird sandwiches. They also sell something weird like a hot dog but the sausages are not served whole, they are cut in slices, dipped in different sauces and then spread on a weird bread. The sauce's flavors are awful, like mint, cranberries, strawberry and I just can't find one I would consider edible.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

Back to the past with my parents. We're in Lisbon, at some metro station. Looks brand new although it has the vintage look before modern renovations. We are looking for an exit and go through a door which leads directly to inside a mall. But not the entrance, but to some service corridor on the back of the cinema area. So some lady says we can't be there and tries to push us out. But I find another door on this corridor, which actually leads to the interior of the mall and I pull my parents in. There is an arcade with old videogames and kids playing and my mom spots Ronaldo in his teenage years. She can't resist to go meet him and when she calls him for his name he looks surprised, because he doesn't recognize her. She doesn't explain it either and looks like a creepy old lady. I see an opportunity here and I push my mom aside. I tell him I'd like to talk to him. He is still the ugly teenager who wouln't say no to some good looking lady. So I take him away from the crowd and I slowly tell him that I am from the future and have something important to tell him. At first he thinks I am nuts, so show him my smartphone, trying to impress him, but he dismisses it and actually wants to know more of what I have to say. I tell him he is going to be one of the most famous people in the world and very rich and also look hot, so now I have his attention. I tell him he must follow my tips and do what I know he did in his life (i actually don't know much) so he doesn't miss the opportunities that lead him there. In exchange I only ask for his generosity when he does succeed, to share some of his wealth with me in the future, when I come to him. But he is very distracted, I ask him to repeat to me what I tell him about the teams he'll play on and he keeps messing it up and saying he will work at a post office. He also gets distracted with some lady in a car looking at us and them complains that his shorts are falling down because they're too large. I offer him several strings and pieces of fabric to use as a belt and while he sorts that out, I grab a paper to write bullet points for him. But I keep throwing them away because the text is never what I want. I wake up when I understand it is a dream.

Getting my car out of a parking lot with my parents inside and I lose control and crash against someone behind us. If it was a small car it would have been crushed, but it is a big van from the Civil Protection services. The driver is upset but keeps calm. My parents come out of the car to mediate. He moves his car to a parking space and I follow him with mine. As I get out of the car, some slender girl bumps into me. She has some black silicone gag in her mouth and zip ties in her hands behind her back and seems to plead for help. She is so thin that I manage to pick her up and carry her in my arms. I take her inside my mom's house which is strangely right there, and I sit her in the kitchen while I cut the zip ties and remove the gag. She can't talk because she is in shock and has dry mouth. I ask mom for water. The guy from the van I hit is also there to help and as everyone tries to do something I ask them to please collect the objects with care and put them in plastic bags as they might have fingerprints for the police. I say I am gonna call the cops and my dad sighs. He says that once again I found something to keep myself busy. I don't understand his remarks since it is not my fault that stuff keep happening to me.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP


I am with my parents and maybe some more family members. Some woman comes by and says she has info about my paternal grandma. Says she was actually from Canada and came to Portugal and got citizenship and got married and nobody ever knew about it. I am baffled, but also don't see how that changes anything about my identity. My dad explains he hired this lady to investigate this. My mom steps in and starts rambling about meaningless stuff, making my dad yell at her. He tells her this is important business and she is talking about totally unrelated stuff. The lady leaves but there is a promise she will come back to share more info.
We gather around a table to feast. it is some family reunion and there are lot of yummy things on the table. For some reason I get horny looking at some carrots. So I pick up a carrot and go alone to another room. I sit on a couch and play with the carrot ( you know what I am talking about). Then some bunch of guys enters the room and face me in an awkward position with a carrot. They don't say a word and their faces are in shock. At first I feel I wanna disappear, but then on the back of my head there is this slight trust that none of this is real so I decide to go for it and propose them to fuck. After the initial shock, they actually go for it, so they line up and one at a time, they drop their pants and bang me. I had several orgasms for real without waking up. On maybe the third I do wake up, but hang in there between dream and wakefulness and the orgasm lingers in a limbo, without really ending for quite some time. When I fully wake up, I am still feeling the rush for some time after.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

With Riverstone and Nighthawk at what I think is his place. There is a table with a feast and we are chillin. He is laying down on the couch. We have some weird interaction and I feel like he wants to speak with Riverstone alone, so I leave. He says he has some IT issues and hints that I might help out, so I offer to do so and he instructs me to go to an office room down the hallway. Outside on the hallway it feels like a hostel or guest house, not a private house. And indeed the office looks more like a cyber café, with dozens of computers and printers and people on many desks. I sneak peak into someone's work and seems like he is writting a thesis. I spot a pc that is the only one without someone working on it. By its side there are also some papers, of someone clearly working with it and maybe on a break, and I almost decide to steal the pc and leave with it, but then I don't. Instead I need to pee and go look for a bathroom. Weirdly, I have to go out on the street and walk back and forth some stone stairway at the top of some avenue, because the toilet stalls are all lined up on the sides of the street and stairway. I finally find one free, but despite my efforts, can't pee. (Wake up and really need to pee)

I am in some weird surreal place, at first can't really characterize it, but looks kinda hellish, a barren land with a lake of lava or black oil on fire. I notice there is a big fuss and some dudes are fighting with some weird kind of weapons, and I try to walk away discreetly, but then all eyes turn to me because I have on my hands a bigger and more spectacular weapon than theirs. The weapons are hard to describe, but are sort of an eliptical light saber which we grab in the middle (which is void, maybe some kind of force field, but my hands can hold it). Everyone feels like I am challlenging them, so they stop fighting and start attacking me instead. I fight them off easily.
I think I start becoming lucid and just drop the dream. Find myself in a dark empty space and decide to rip apart the dream fabric, quite literally, like a paper scenario. Behind it is total void and I plunge into it. The fall is short and I land with my back onto what appears to be the lower bed on a bunkbed. To my right is a wall, to the left is another bunkbed. People are sleeping in those. I get up and when walking to the door I have this clear feeling I should look up to whomever is on the top bunkbed. He just raised his head. It is my teacher. He smiles and extends his hand. I grab his hand and kiss it. I smile back and say "I am finally here" and we just smile at each other for a while. He comes down. A male attendant also gets up from another bed. I am surprised he can also see me. My teacher walks outside with me, and we are followed by his attendant, who is acting like a body guard, but not against me, against anyone else we might come across. We enter some kitchen or canteen and my teacher sits on a chair. I am holding his hand still and I lay my head on his lap and wrap my arms around his waist. He suggests I get a chair to and sit, but I hesitate, because I don't want to move. Eventually I agree to get a chair, but then wake up.