Lucid-schizo-dreamer

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

At some beach house with Riverstone and a couple of my cats and some friends, like Tânia. I hear that Jonh Blacksmith is also around and for some reason I am asked to accompany some kid to the place he s staying, to deliver a message. After doing so, I stay there to chat a little bit. But John is so very busy, going back and forth and in out of the room. Then he says he needs to go shower, but will come back, so I interpret that he wants me to wait. I stay but I fall asleep on his bed. I notice him coming in later on and getting dressed. He knows I am there but doesn't want to wake me up. He lookdearingly to me. I play with it and pretend to be on a light sleep and reposition myself to a cute sleeping pose. Then he goes out again and I think maybe he left because I was alseeep, so I get up to clear that up. I see myself in a mirror. I have a cute yellow ruffled dress and short hair, which all messy. So I tidy up a little bit and then he comes back again. He sees me picking up my stuff to leave, so he calls me on to stand in front of him and he says something nervously. I don't understand half of what he says but I feel the emotion in his words. He is saying that he loves me and wants to be with me and apparently he is free to do it. He starts crying like a baby, with snot in his nose and I also start crying and we embrace each other warmly. He points to inside the wardrobe and says something that I again have trouble understanding. I ask him to repeat and he says there is a portal in the wardrobe and we can jump through it and get out at some other place where someone he knows can marry us on the spot. I am like "Wait, no!" But some people we know start coming into the room to speak to him and they see him hugging me, so before they see my face and go spread the word about it, I agree to jump. So we jump. On the other side is a large room like an attic and there is some lady there. He explains that she can marry us right away and we can leave everything behind. That's when I get away from him and say "I am sorru but I can't, for better or for worse, I need to go back to my life." And all his plans shatter and I see all hope abandoning him. I loved our cathartic moment together, love the idea that we could have had it differently in a different life, but in this life it is not meant to happen.

I am friend or sister of Ana, who dates Christian Grey. One day she is helping me and Riverstone put stuff into our van and one of her exes passes by on the sidewalk with his snobbish new girlfriend. Ana says "Oh no!" when she sees them, but puts on a smile and says hello to them. The other woman mocks her, by saying she looks good but in a condescendent way. Ana plays it cool and says she is doing good. But the bitch laughs and replies "We can see you really moved up in life". We are really irritated, but we try not to bring up she is dating Christian because that would lowering to her level. In any case, I walk up to her and get my face near hers and say "Bitch, you have no idea. You'd be crying if you knew." She scoffs me off and they walk away. I know she'll eventually find out what I am talking about. Ana is about to get married to him and she'll be on every papparazzi magazine.
Then it's her wedding day and it is very bizarre. First we gather with some of his family in the UK, because his family is full of British nobility. They dress and behave funny, but all of them seem to be nice people. Christian finds Ana hiding in a corner, crying upset and wants to know what's going on. We tell him what happened some days before and how she is still struggling with it. He immediately wants to go confront the woman, but we talk him out of it. Instead we explain how it is to grow up poor, and no matter how much you work, you still never getting enough money to get out of poverty, and the anger that comes with it. And how it isn't remotely ok to shame others just because now you're rich, not due to any accomplishment, but just through marriage. First, because it ain't your money and second, because money should not define your worth in the eyes of anyone else. Therefore Ana is crying out of frustration because she wants to feel self worth for herself. Christian and a friend are listening to this attentively.
Then I leave them and join some other family members wbo are playing silly games. They say they are traditional and I mention they seem totally absurd. All the ladies, one by one, have to try to catch something that will be thrown, but it is not a bouquet, it can be anything else. I get hit by a cloud of sewing pins. I spend like an hour removing them from my chest and face. And even from some poor cat who got in the way when that happened. Then some other girl gets covered in darts, but she is ecstatic. I just think "What in the hell?"
Then there is a feast, but in the end there is so much wasted food, so I stay behind separating what is good to eat and compacting and separating packages for recycling, because I don't know if the servants will do so. I distribute wet bread outside in the garden for pigeons and other birds to eat, and I start putting packages of chips and other snacks in carton boxes and plastic bags and wondering how am I going to take this all on my plane trip back home.