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    26 Mar: Being an Indian goddess

    by , 03-26-2019 at 09:50 AM (101 Views)
    non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

    I live in some ruined temple, like a spirit or ghost, kind of dreamy detachment, not interacting with humans for ages. I am balancing on a swing in a large inner courtyard and singing a song in a traditional Indian style. Then some kind of holy man comes by and sees me. He takes me for a goddess, bows down and worships me. He says my name, something starting with an "S" and kind of long, like Saraswati, but with a couple of "M" in the middle. Slowly I start recalling being this goddess and I feel immensely melancholic, with all the sorrows of the world in my heart. He runs to tell everyone that this goddess is back, thousands come to see me.
    But one man or demon doubts that I am immortal or hates me, so he shoots an arrow at me. I feel pain and he takes it as proof that I am no goddess. Then another man throws another arrow, and another and so forth. The pain is unbearable, but I dont feel that I am dying. Then people who stand by my side also start throwing arrows at the attackers and it seems the whole humanity is fighting, until I fall into the ground, more sad than hurt. Then some men and women around me stop shooting arrows and simply take care of protecting me and taking me to a safe place. They take care of me, remove the arrows with so much love and devotion and I feel better again. The man who threw the first arrow is killed and the fight stops. They bring me back to the temple and organize to take care of me and provide me what I need. I have a room, which looks more like a storage room of antiques, filled with ancient treasures, maybe offerings from my devotees. I feel so tired, I just want people to leave me there quietly alone for eons. But people can't just be quiet, they keep coming to visit me, looking for me, wanting to talk to me.. But I'm like a delicate flower, they shouldn't come close, they shouldn't touch me or talk to me. I stay in absolute silence whenever they address me and I finally decide I need to leave again from this human realm. It's too heavy for me. I hide in a moldy wardrobe, they think I am playing hide and seek and eventually take a peak inside. But I am no longer there. I just needed a dark quiet place to slowly float away to another plane. I can see them as if I am still sitting in the wardrobe, but I am nowhere and everywhere, until humanity needs me and deserves me some day. Then I'll reemerge.

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