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    false awakening

    False Awakening

    1. 17 Feb: Shadowy witch, robotic snake and meeting my teacher lucid

      by , 02-17-2023 at 08:47 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

      At some victorian house, sort of half asleep and seeing the scenario fade away, but I realize it is actually a dream and that it is the dream itself that is fading. I hold on to it, but the darkness doesn't go away and I know this is when sometimes the monsters come up. And then I see a woman coming over and whenever she crosses a more shadowy area, her face becomes monstruous. I warn a friend that is also sleeping nearby to wake up. She doesn't know what I am talking about and she looks at the woman. The woman says in a hypnotic tone "look into my eyes". I grab my friend and say "don't look, it will kill you". I get in front of the woman and I say assertively "Now, you look into my eyes!" at the side of her face that is not disfigured. She looks puzzled and loses a bit of her power temporarily, so I open some curtains to let light in and I drag my friend to the outside. The woman still tries to reach me, but she can't stand the light. I decide to lift off and that's when I go fully lucid. I don't know what to do, so I decide to just watch the dream. Below me it now looks like some big american city. I also see a huge roller-coaster in the distance. There is some retro vibe to it. I just amuse myself by flying over people and watching their dramas. I feel very melancholic thinking how all these people are just DCs. I sing and dance in the sky above them.

      Visiting my mom at her old job at the Union. They are at some warehouse with piles of boxes with files and lots of stickers, calendars and other stuff I used to steal from them and collect as a child. I am mesmerized by all the retro things they have, not fully aware that I am dreaming, but aware I am seeing something gone from the past. I grab a box with some stickers to take with me as mementos. For some reason my dog Hachi appears and all is fine until someone else also comes in with 2 dogs and a baby. I grab Hachi immediately and try to take him somewhere where I can keep him isolated. Unfortunately there is only a small room with no windows and I don't want to lock him there. So when the other dogs follow us and we get cornered there, I close them inside instead and take Hachi away.
      We go to my mom's and he roams around the house free. After a while I am looking for him and find him in the balcony injured with a bad open wound in his front right leg. Nearby is a robotic snake I keep as a toy, also severely "hurt". Turns out she can bite and it is a powerful metallic bite. I try getting close to him, but he cowers and hides his leg. I go get hydrogen peroxide and throw copious amounts on his wound. He ends up accepting my treatment and even puts his front legs over mine to thank me, I guess. Then I also want to help the snake but need something to grab it safely. I didn't know she had such a dangerous self defense mechanism.


      At my childhood home, alone, and I become lucid. I go into my room, honestly just wanting again to dwell on the melancholic feeling of seeing things from my past. But then I feel crazy horny and feel the urge to remove my pants. I look around for objects I might use creatively, but all I see is a wooden spoon over the bed for no good reason. So I give up on objects. Instead I decide to experiment what it would feel like if my clitoris grew to become a very long penis. Long enough that it reaches my mouth. And then I suck it. I almost wake up with the sensation but I manage to come back to the dream. Then I jump scare when through the balcony door I see 3 Rinpoches sitting outside. They are not looking at me, they are to right side, almost out of sight. I can only see a bit of their faces but I recognize them ckearly. They are facing forward as if listening or watching someone to my left side. I pull my pants up quickly, deeply embarassed, hoping they didn't see that. I get up and walk slowly towards the balcony sliding doors. Then they turn their heads towards me and nod at me wtth a smile. As I approach, I see many more of them and recognize almost all of them. Then some more pass by from my left side and disappear behind the ones sitting. The balcony is no longer a balcony, but some room somewhere else. They all aknowledge my presence, nod and smile, but none says a word. Then I walk forward a few more steps and I see my teacher to my left. He is standing there and he is the one all others were looking at or listening. They hint that I should come in and I do. Rinpoche comes to me and we immediately hug. Then we kiss. It is a shy confused kiss, because I want to kiss him on the lips but I am not sure if it is ok, so I kinda go for the cheek but still touch his lips. He seems surprised but pleased. We continue hugging. Then he kisses me on the lips properly. It feels incredible and totally real. We continue hugging tight and saying how much we missed each other, while I caress his back and head. I can even feel the smooth edges of his robe on his back and do my autistic thing of stimming by feeling the calming texture of the seam.
      Then he moves on and we are in some kind of library or classroom and I realize we need to get out because a class or lecture is about to start.
      Lucidity fades a bit from here. Outside he is with his entourage and they are heading to some place to lunch with, but he specifically says to his attendant that I am to have lunch with the more private group and sit by his side in the upper room. The restaurant is asian, but I can't tell from which country. Rinpoche and the private group disappear upstairs as I am distracted looking at the food they have on display. Then I am not allowed to come up. When finally that is cleared up, I arrive there, but Rinpoche has disappeared again, maybe to go to the bathroom or something, I think. The people there look me sideways and want me to sit me at the "kids" table. I see three empty seats and figure that's where Rinpoche will sit so I say I think I am supposed to sit there to, but they mock me and bully me. Some lady is being incredibly rude and gets into my nerves, so I bang my hand on the table, wanting to punch her, and say "one of these seats is for me, just wait and see". But I feel bad for my ego outburst, so I just go and sit at a bench near the window, at the far end of the table, but where Rinpoche can see me when he returns. Then we hear his voice on loud speakers, interviewing some indian fella and it is about Russia and some allegory with volcanos and people wonder what is this about.
    2. 30 Jan: False awakenings and exploring a backroomy dimension lucid

      by , 01-30-2023 at 08:59 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

      I am between sleep and wakefulness and I hear my dogs barking outside, when suddenly I wake up with the sound of my front door slamming and I feel scared. I am confused and think that the only other person in the house is my mother on the ground floor and she would not go outside in the middle of the night for any reason, which worries me even further. Then I actually wake up and realize most likely no one slammed the door and also that my mother isn't in my home at all, it is Riverstone who is sleeping downstairs and I just had a false awakening. My dogs are also quiet, so I don't know if them barking was also part of the dream.

      With Riverstone on a van going up a road and the engine is not managing to pull it up. He is driving and he steps on the accelerator to try to reach the top of the hill, but on a curve he loses control and the van rolls over to the side of the road. As we tumble, it gets dark and Riverstone loses his consciousness. I shake him hard and he doesn't wake up. I am really worried. When he finally does, we are in bed at my mom's house and he asks me why am I shaking him up like that. I am confused and tell him about my dream. He says that I am just remembering a traumatic event and I say no way, I don't recall it ever happening in the past. He says it did, we had that accident. I feel more confused about what's real or not. Then we go to the kitchen for a snack as he says now he is angry and we reheat some pizza on the microwave. I think about how I would never eat pizza in the middle of the night, but I am starting to feel maybe none of this is real, so what the heck, I actually eat some and ask for more. Then my mom comes and asks what's going on, I tell her the whole story and continue to chat while eating. Then I am worried we might wake up grandma and mom says "you're really confused, she passed away some time ago, it's just us here". Then I realize once again I am still dreaming all this. Then we are at a fair, where we volunteer at a booth. It is a mix between art display, book sales and alternative medicines. I am rearranging some books on a table and again confused about what's real or not, when some friends come over from another booth and I tell about my confusion and the whole accident story and that I can't even remember my best friends' names. They show some concern, but then some wild boar enters the place running and causing much damage, until he gets killed and someone takes it outside to the back of the building and leaves it on the ground temporarily. I go take a look at it soon after and some dog like a Husky is trying to eat the boar. He is making a mess so I shoo him. He doesn't like and attacks me. He actually looks more like a wolf now. I climb some structure to get out of its reach but it is not enough, the dog or wolf jumps high and almost bites me. I stop it with my arm and a sort of punch to its head, which beheads the animal. The animal's head falls to the ground and the rest of the body vanishes completely. I am in shock and that's when I realize I must be dreaming. So I lift off flying up and as I leave the ground, I realize I am inside some giant barn like structure. But I try to get rid of logic and let my mind roam free, so when I reach the ceiling, it just inverts and then there is like a second barn upside down. I enter some sort of backroomy dimension with buildings growing upside down and sideways and I just go through them and through wooden walls, ceilings, etc, just trying to get lost in the nonsense, not trying to make it right, trying to make my mind maleable. Then end up in a version of my own attic, but looking like a 60s lounge, with lots of yellow pillows and puffs on the floor. I plunge again in the wooden walls and this time I end up floating in a void for while, almost waking up. After a few seconds I start seeing the inside of the wood in big detail, as if magnified or if I shrunk to microsize. I don't feel my body, just my head, so I feel an urge to lick the surface with my tongue and it feels scaly. Then I am in a regular room but decorated in cluttercore style. There are so many carpets, plushies, curtains, pillows and all sorts of colorful bric-a-brac all over. I feel compelled to just admire it all. I realize my mind is trying to distract me with stuff, lots of stuff, but I indulge for a while. I go from room to room and each one is crazier than the other. Some rooms I need to go up or down through some wall mount ladder to reach the next room. I then see a box of jewels and a mirror in a small cozy bedroom and can't help trying them on, feeling that I am falling for the temptations to distract me. When I look in the mirror, I look absolutely goddess like. For fun I make the jewels, hairstyles and hair color change. Then I remember that often when I look at myself in the mirror in dreams, my face starts shifting and becoming mosnter-like, so I decide to take control of the process and just cause it myself, to fight that fear. My face slowly melts and I become ugly, my eyes all dark, fangs, messy hair. It makes me feel uneasy, but not terrified, because I am in control. I think about meditating next for a while, but I wake up.
    3. 27 Mar: Lamb's head, making out with Seth Rogen, demon, semi-lucid explorations

      by , 03-27-2021 at 11:01 AM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

      Some avant-garde show or ritual where some guy goes around defying the audience to dance inspired by what they are watching. Many on the audience seem to be professional dancers by the way they move. Then someone starts passing a lamb head as a prop. But the lamb head is alive and I feel horrified, but not like scared, but worried for the "animal". So I kidnap the lamb's head and run away with it. Take it to the vet and they say it needs surgery to survive. After we get some more info about the origin of the animal, the vets tell me I need to go to Africa and get something that will heal the animal. Once in Africa, in some remote village, I need to pass a door with two guards. I try seducing them, but they don't flinch. Then ask me for a million dollars to go in. I explain the situation and say it is to save an animal's life and they reduce to half a million, which is still ridiculous but I agree to and they let me in. I then steal whatever was inside the guarded house and return to the vet. The lamb is now able to get its surgery and regrow a body. Later I get a call from the vet saying the animal is doing great.


      I married to some rich family, but I have this feeling I did it against my will and feel unhappy. I am walking with my family through some hipster area of old docks now turned into restaurants and bars. By the other side of the river I see Manhattan. I am walking ahead of them, making a little dance waving a white shawl in the air, feeling empty inside. Then I encounter Zilla by chance and she walks with me. She spots some vegan fast food and invites me to come along. I do and let go of whomever I was with before. Riverstone is there too and although it's mid morning, they both wanna eat lunch. At first I say they are crazy but then I give in to the idea and ask for an Impossible Burger. While we sit at a table, I get notified that I have an exam to renew my driving license renewal in a day or two and I panic because I wasn't aware and haven't studied shit.

      I am dating Seth Rogen. I am half lucid, so at first I feel like "Why didn't I chose some hunkier guy to fool around with?". But he is extremely sweet and I actually start feeling the hots for him. We're sitting on a bed or couch, making out, and when I kiss him he gets really excited, in a very adorable innocent way that makes me want him more. He starts reaching out to his pants and I am totally into it. But then I notice that there is another bed to our side and two girls are sitting on it, watching us and that disturbs me. Worse, I spot a red demon under their bed and see that he is about to snatch one of the girls, so I jump to grab her and rescue her. The demon gets pissed and starts projecting long arms, claws and tentacles and weird heads coming from under the sheets, without ever leaving the bed area. I beat him as hard as I can until he kinda retreats and I sunk into the wall.

      My mom is with her friend Paula. We are at an ice cream shop and I look for a vegan flavor. There is one for the stupid price of almost 25€. I complain a lot to the seller and he seems not to understand my complaint. Then I realize that's the price for a whole bucket of like 5 to 10 lt and I apologize and ask how much for a cone with a ball. I then follow my mom and Paula to a car. They didn't get ice cream so Paula is offering something else like crackers to my mom and ask if I want some to. Then we go get my dog Hachi and Paula goes get some other dog like animal on a leash to accompany us on a walk, but it is some dog-like alien with green body parts. I insist that she keeps a good distance from me and Hachi, because Hachi already reacts bad to other dogs, let alone alien dogs, but she keeps forgetting and getting to close for comfort. One time they almost get into a fight, so I give up on this walk and we take the dogs away. Later on I accompany them again to some kind of old garage where mom is talking to the owner and some guy offers us crackers and cheese. I am giving it a try when my Sensei enters the place. First he pretends not to see me while he talks to the rest of the people, clearly nervous about approaching me. I also pretend not to have seen him in the first seconds, but then gather courage and I say hi and give him a hug. He feels relieved and actually a bit overjoyed, so then he gropes my breast and pretends it is by accident, but I know it wasn't. I ask about the classes, he says it all stopped because of the pandemic, but that he misses it a lot. I say I do to. I wonder why he doesn't ask me why I left the classes way before the pandemic started.
      Music starts playing, some Latino rhythms like salsa and he and everyone else start dancing. I don't want him to invite me to dance, so I leave through a back door into a backyard and I see my mom is already there with some new age "kumbaya" group. They seem harmless, so I let her be. Then they invite us to go on a boat trip and I start drifting from the dream.
      Probably had a very brief episode of FA and felt my bed shake like there was an earthquake, but that brought me back to the dream on the boat. I laugh and tell my mom that when the boat started the engines, it coincided with me feeling my bed in RL shaking and she laughs.

      I am again semi-lucid, back on land at some ground floor mall at some private condominium, but the atmosphere is dark and heavy and I see no one around. I also feel watched by agents or demons whom I know to be present in the dream, ready to attack me. I walk through the corridors and sense a presence following me. I do evasive maneuvers until I find an exit and run around the building to try and see me stalker. It is some shady guy who disappears again. I see a lady walking away with the alien dog from Paula. I fly upwards to assess my surroundings and then land in some university campus, which I find lovely. Each faculty seems to have a theme, for instance, literature classes take place in a mini medieval village, where each house is a classroom and people gather around communal tables to debate topics, instead of facing a teacher. I walk a bit through the narrow streets, the houses are all ground level timber-framed and feel very cozy. At the end of one of the streets there is a bigger building, like and open hangar, but it is a tavern or bar, and the decoration changes completely. It is 60s and cinema inspired. It has the colors and the furniture typical from the 60s and posters of old spy movies on the walls. There is a door leading to the parking lot with a toll booth. A vintage car from the 50s just stopped at the booth and when I approach, a bunch of gangsters come out of it and point guns at me. Turns out I also have a gun and also drop it on them. For some reason they stand down and leave. My cat Yéti comes out of nowhere and I pick him up. Once on the normal city streets, I see my mom's apartment building or a very similar one, but with a few more balconies. I see the details like the tiles on the walls and feel extremely nostalgic about it, to see how detailed it is engraved in my memory. Then I fly upwards and take notice of the rest of the buildings around, think about getting beyond this and do something interesting. I fly higher and higher, until what I see below me is an African plain at sunset, as far as the eye can see. I feel free and relaxed, but my cat Yéti who I am still holding, is getting pretty nervous and wanting to jump, so I look for some place to drop him safely. There is a house floating in the air, no front wall for some reason, so I just go inside. I am planning on resting there for a while, see if Yéti can be left there safely, but the house starts tilting and everything in it slides through the open wall and falls into the void below us. Some old Asian lady comes in from another room, looking surprised to see me and in panic. I only have time to grab Yéti again and I jump into the void to fly away on my terms instead of falling.

      I am in a room talking with BTS and I find them all very nice and smart people. I decide to become their fan and wonder if any of the guys in the band is single, so that I could hang out with. I sit between two of them and one, I think the youngest, immediately leans on my shoulder and gets really close. I was fantasizing about dating one of them, but all of a sudden I feel like he is pushing it a bit too much too soon, so I tell him nicely to back off amd take it easy. The others laugh.
    4. 14 Nov: Refugee camp in the mountains, trapped in astral plane, starving parakeet

      by , 11-14-2020 at 05:20 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA/AP

      I am in the mountains, heading to some camp with lots of kids. Zilla is there too and she organized a paper-chase game for the kids, inspired in Harry Potter and they are quite entertained following clues through paths in the mountains. But this is like a refugee camp, not a summer camp and we are on the move, running away from something dangerous.
      I get a surprise visit by Nighthawk and I am so happy to see him. We sit at the entrance of a tent and as we talk, we lean towards each other and I can't resist to kiss him. Then we embrace each other passionately. Things are heating up so we head inside. But then some bad guys with guns invade the camp and we all try to run to safer places, unsuccessfully. They've surrounded us and they snatch a kid and kill him. They say they'll keep coming and kill us all one by one. Then they leave and we all start mourning. I sob in deep despair.
      I wake up from the dream because of my crying, I feel like I am sobbing in RL. But instead of really waking up, I go through a false awakening and end up in the astral plane. I am in the bed at my room in the attic, it is dark and something is off. I sense dark presences and I start hearing a baby crying. It's disturbing and it doesn't stop. I get up and sit on the bed as I hear steps of someone coming. I hope it is Riverstone, so I call for him but I get no response. As I start feeling sheer terror, I start yelling as loud as I can, trying to be heard in RL or wake myself up. I realize no sound is actually coming out of my mouth in my RL body. I freak out for a bit because I feel trapped and unable to communicate or get out. Until I decide to calm down and ignore the fear and the baby crying. I slowly wake up.


      I am at my mom's with Riverstone, looking for some bird cages with different sizes that I know she has in the attic. We use it sometimes for rescue birds. I am shocked to find one tiny cage that only fits one bird standing, which has a parakeet inside. I can't understand how that is possible at all. These cages have been stored for at least a year. I rush to give water and a bit of kiwi to the poor bird and I can sense he is desperate. I can't wait to let him fly free in the room a little bit. He first falls on the bed as he is very weak but then manages to fly to the window and grab the metal frame of the window. I go get him to put him in a larger cage with food and water so he can recover, but he panics thinking I am going to trap him again in the tiny one. I also can feel all his bones and it is so afflictive.
    5. 5 Oct: Alien drone hologram, ghost of my grandpa and serial killer

      by , 10-05-2020 at 11:38 AM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening astral projection

      I am in VFX, the nearest city, heading to the bus station to get a bus home, but the street is packed with people. It's some holiday and everyone is celebrating. Then I realize I am not wearing a mask and have been walking through all these people who are also maskless. I look deep inside my bag and find a mask I carry for emergencies. The buses are not coming and people are angry. Then a group of people at the end of the line for the bus, spots a bus stopping a few hundred meters before, to avoid the crowd and they start running to get to it firs. I join them. Then a meteorite crosses the sky. We hear something on the news about incoming meteorites worldwide. When I finally get to my mom's home, another one of those meteorites flies by her building. I go to the window to check it out and realize it is not a meteorite but a spherical UFO. It comes to check our windows. I tell mom to stay still but the UFO somehow enters the room without breaking the window and analyzes us. Mom panics and collapses. The UFO is a type of intelligent drone and asks us to cooperate or else. Then forces us to have a math lesson with a hologram teacher, who for some reason is Cristina, a Portuguese tv host. She asks me to solve a math problem but I struggle with it, because she wrote it on a screen and immediately deleted it, plus they give a gadget that is some kind f calculator and I don't know how to operate it. They get upset. Meanwhile my dad comes in, doesn't realize there is an alien drone projecting an hologram, thinks the lady is real and starts flirting with her. I feel so embarrassed that I ask the alien drone to please forgive him and it actually becomes more friendly.

      Spending some time at some place like a kindergarten. I am friends with the teacher and I am replacing or helping her. RAP has a kid going there and at the end of the day comes to get him. We meet and we get very friendly, we goof around a lot. I think he likes me. Then his wife also comes by and he introduces me to her with too much enthusiasm and with his hand around my waist. I feel awkward and she clearly is very upset. She is gorgeous, but I get the vibe he has way more fun with me. Some woman complains the next day that her kids didn't do homework or something and that it was our fault.

      I am sleeping over at some Japanese friends' house. When I arrive he serves me tea. Hands me a strange package with detachable packets, each one with a different infusion. I just want to drink some hot beverage, but he claims it is important that I read the texts printed on each packet and choose the one I want accordingly, no matter if it's in the middle or end of it. I say I don't care, just detach the first one and he insists the choice is part of the experience and we end up debating the virtues of caring or not for that and I no longer care about the tea. I then spot on his tv some anime show that looks familiar. I see that it is written by a polish guy I know from the Sangha. I love it and then realize it is very similar to the story I have been wanting to finish for a graphic novel.

      I am back in VFX with Riverstone and the town looks totally different. The street layout is changed, one of the main roads is now pedestrian friendly and it has now lots of tourist shops selling historic artifacts and ethnic crafts. I find my dad at an Indian shop arguing with the seller that some amethyst necklace is actually made of turquoise. I try to reason with him that the Indian guy is right but he insists we are wrong. I accidentally damage a bag some with ink I had in my hand and try to hide it, but then my dad knocks down a bottle of perfume and breaks so all attentions go to him.


      I think I have a moment of astral projection. Starts off as a false awakening in my bed, it's dark in my room, I feel my cats cozied up in bed with me, but at the same time I realize I am not quite in my body and I am seeing through my closed eyelids. Then I hear a strange "ting ting" noise approaching and recognize it as my grandpa's walker coming towards my room and stopping by the side of my bed. I don't see him, but I do feel very clearly a presence and a darker shadow where the sound just stopped. My grandpa died a couple of days ago, so I realize I am being visited by a ghost. First I feel scared but then force myself to calm down, after all it is just grandpa checking on me before possibly departing to elsewhere. Just like he would do when he was alive, he would walk by silently and look casually without saying a word before moving on.

      At some area with apartments, shops and gym. I just had an ice cream at a food truck and some guys that know me and some who don't, just exchanged some comments and catcalled me. I am a gorgeous woman, with the looks of the likes of Sofia Vergara, but I am also a detective or police agent in my pant suit trying to be respected for who I am. The sun is setting as I walk across a courtyard leading to a long staircase down to a car park. From the top of the stairs I see the shadow of someone stabbing another person at the car park. I am unarmed and my instinct is to go back and see if nobody else is coming and call for backup. I enter a gym that is just right next to me and warn some women there of what just happened so they take cover and hide. I also call the police and they say they already had been warned because there are more bodies and the killer is on a spree. When they arrive, they take me to where there is a line of bodies left by the killer on a street nearby and they evacuate everybody in the danger zone to a safer place. The manhunt starts. I find a suspicious black woman hiding in a tight corner of an alley holding a knife. I tell her to stand down but she won't and tries to attack me. I remove her knife but she has more knives and keeps reaching out to it. I manage to remove all knives and immobilize her and other agents come to take her. She claims she is only hiding from the killer and has the right to defend herself because I could be the killer. I grant her the benefit of the doubt and I say that I believe her and I apologize if we are being unfair but she still needs to be interrogated because she was acting suspicious and had some 5 knives on her.
      The officers then tell me they have found the suspect, a male, and he is cornered on the top floor of a building with a kid hostage. We all go there but only I go inside the room to negotiate. He has a knife pointed to the kids throat but I get close enough to throw a small knife to his head. Doesn't kill him but hurts him enough so he drops the kid. The kid is taken by other officers. The killer takes the knife out of his skull and grabs more knives. We fight, he cuts me a bit, but in the end I make a choke hold with my legs around his neck, disarm him and flip back throwing him unconscious. I am exhausted and hurt. All my colleagues are in state of shock and awe and unable to say anything. I feel sad and lonely as I pass them going down the stairs.

      Updated 10-12-2020 at 08:30 PM by 34880

      Categories
      dream fragment , non-lucid , false awakening , memorable
    6. 12 Nov: Department store and false awakening

      by , 11-12-2019 at 03:23 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      At a department store. Going through different sections, checking clothes, then latest electronics and end up in the music and film area. Not looking for anything specific, but remember to take a look for Björk albums, since I don't buy cds for years. I find a cd which I didn't know, and check the inlay booklet. Looks nice, but I think it is one of those Björk albums which I don't particularly like and I wonder if I am willing to pay whatever it costs. But there is no price tag, so I need to go to the check-out with it.


      Then I have a FA and think I am in my bedroom. It is very dark, but once again I see this little purplish orb moving around the room. It is beautiful, but it also makes me feel uneasy. Since last time my teacher told me to swallow it, my first instinct was to do so again. So when it got near the bed, I opened my mouth widely and swallowed it. It went totally dark and then I woke up or entered a dream, I am not sure.
    7. 1 Aug: Sleep paralysis, FA and flying around lucid

      by , 08-01-2019 at 08:43 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      I think I had a WILD. Don't remember exactly what happened but think I fell asleep, experienced brief sleep paralysis with audio hallucinations, like people talking. Then a false awakening. Confusion lasted only a few seconds. Realized right away I had fallen asleep and became lucid. But it wasn't an interesting dream. I was just at some dark place. I flew around. Felt lucidity fading, so I looked into my hands. Then plunged into the ground and continued flying through some new scenario. Not much happened because I didn't have a plan.
    8. 26 Jan: Running from home, spiritual encounter and expelling a demon

      by , 01-26-2019 at 11:12 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening


      Living with my family, but feeling despaired and wanting to run away. I am preparing a bag with clothes and a few more items to run away while they are all out. Then my family returns, I hide the bag, no one suspects of my plans. But I see my mom and I start reconsidering my plans because of her. I don't want her to suffer for not knowing about my whereabouts. She is the only one I don't want to hurt.

      All alone in Brussels, very early morning. People are still going around, hoping from bar to bar. I feel pretty alive and aware and I absorb all the details of the decorations, architecture, the terraces, etc. I notice that the street is warm but in between terraces it is extremely cold. That's because they use gas heating on each terrace. Then I am dragged with a crowd into a very underground place. Its entrance is literally a tunnel with no light, just some very fade lamps at the end of it, where there is a door. The people and the light and the shadows make really interesting images and I grab my phone to take photos.

      Enjoying my last day abroad. Go to a fair, incredibly crowded. Then at some lateral street I see a couple of Buddhist monks and decide to follow them.
      I find a long line of monks waiting to go inside some building and I go with them. Once inside they prostrate until we reach a room with an altar and some pictures and images of Buddhas and teachers. I pay my respects to. Then follows another room and another altar and more prostrations. As I also prostrate, an old lady in a thin robe appears and leans over to whisper in the ear of the woman in front of me, something about her health and some advice on how to deal with it. The woman seems caught by surprise but thankful for the advice. Then the lady turns to me, her robe opens up, she is naked and doesn't care. She tells me I have to summon and surround myself with nagas to expel the bad naga that is disturbing me. I say "what?" but she goes away without further clarification. I get up and follow her through the crowded streets until she enters her house. She doesn't pay attention to me, never says a word, but also doesn't ask me to leave. She feeds her cat and does whatever she has to do. I tell her I need to know more about her warning, and tell her that my mom had dreamed something related to it the previous night [she did, in waking life]. She doesn't reply but she points me to a bedroom where I can spend the night. I stay there. I lay on the bed and I fall asleep. Then wake up but feel drowsy. I try to move, but feel like my body weighs a ton. Then try to call for help and my voice sounds terribly deep, scary and distorted, like I have a demon controlling my body. I fight back for some time. Then eventually it goes away and I recover control. I don't see the lady anymore.

      Then leave to airport. I am back to Lisbon. There are some new constructions by the river bank and I fly over to see the changes. I find a burger stall with a nice terrace, selling really pricey food. A veggie burger is 15€ and a whole meal with fancy wine and dessert is 250€. But then I look around and find a really cool vegan fast food place that has affordable delicacies and I call Riverstone to come have lunch with me there. I meet Evangelion there by chance.

      Updated 01-26-2019 at 11:14 PM by 34880

      Categories
      non-lucid , false awakening , dream fragment
    9. 16 Jan: Entering the Matrix and weird school

      by , 01-16-2019 at 08:39 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening


      I have a FA in Riverstone's room. It's dark and I can't find any lights, There is a flashlight but also does not work. I hear scary monster sounds. I go check what it is,
      I get lucid, but still feel a bit scared. I see a dark figure, think it is the monster, hit it with the flashlight. Light comes up and no monster, just kittens all over, even coming from inside the walls.

      Mom picks me up, there's a job opening for plant expert at some small company in our hometown. I need to fill an application. Some kids come by. One steals some documents that were on the table.

      Me and some others enter the Matrix with Neo. I think we formed some kind of army to free others. Entering the matrix was fun and psychedelic, like riding a roller coaster while swallowing matrix code. Once inside, we have really cool looks, but not all black like in the movies. We are wearing mostly shades of blue. I have a dress with a balloon skirt, but a bit too short and later I find some fabrics to use as an extra skirt and feel more comfortable. When we enter we find ourselves on some kind of crosswalk on top of buildings, like a suspended terrace and there is a sort of giant wave wall to our right that looks like a tsunami coming to hit us but that never does. It is mesmerizing.

      Then we go to some kind of school to train us and it was very posh, looks like an opera house. Even the bathrooms are so very fancy and vintage-y. There are some true geniuses among us. One black kid, seems as young as six, presents us with a music piece he had composed and although it wasn't entirely original and innovative, it was incredible anyway. I could recognize influences of Vangelis, the Blade Runner OST and some other electronic artist. Nobody else thought so, but the kid confirmed. I told him, it is so very well composed, but because it doesn't sound original, it is not amazing. "You have to find your own sound and then you will blow our minds". I wanted to be honest but still encourage him. He felt both pleased and ego hurt, which is normal.
      Some people don't like me much, maybe because I am some teacher's favorite and it always feels awkward when I enter a class late and the teacher acknowledged my presence instead of letting me quietly sit like with everyone else. Even when they seemed to be reprimanding me, everybody could feel they were actually happy to see me.
      Last day of school and we're packing clothes to go home. My dog Bernardo appears out of nowhere and he has one eye out gouged and I freak out. Then he starts making weird electronic sounds and I see his eye is bionic. I find a way to open up the side of his head and fix the wires to put back is eye in place.
    10. 5 Jan: LDs, flying through majestic surreal landscapes and making out with my teacher

      by , 01-05-2019 at 10:38 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      At some house, looking through clothes my mom found in trash, then also some toys which are to be donated to a kindergarten, checking if they are complete and playing a bit with some of the games.
      Then for no reason I see my teacher sitting at the end of this room, with it's back turned to me and I get lucid.
      I go towards him and surprise him by touching him softly in his back. He is wearing a light brown shirt and he looks to the side to see me. I move my hand down his arm and gently caress him. He shuts his eyes in total surrender. So I kiss him. I notice his lips a bit dry, but soon our salivas mix and our tongues intertwine, while I caress his shaved head. I enjoy every bit of it.
      Then I realize there is someone else in the room. We stop and I turn to this person. It looks like my dad, he doesn't seem to recognize me. He turns away quickly and heads to a door. As he opens the door, he looks back one more time and his physiognomy changed. He is taller, slimmer, more tanned and dresses like an Indian man. I follow him but lose him in the movement of people outside. My attention also gets drawn by the majestic landscape and I don't follow the man anymore. In front of me are some amazing mountains covered in luscious green vegetation. And there are people going up and down the mountains, apparently carrying things, picking up fruits, going about many different activities. Strangely, the mountains seem extremely tall ,but people have the same apparent dimension whether they are at the top of it or down at its base. I see a huge strange black bird flying over my head. It is the size of a big eagle, it has a beak like a toucan and strange wings that make a half-moon shape with the first two feathers on each side slightly round and color red. I follow its flight and to my left I see what seem like clouds made of liquid water, which give the impression that everything beneath it, is underwater. There is a type of tree whose top touches the liquid cloud and behaves like kelp in the ocean. Then I turn my attention again to the mountains. I realize the contours of the mountains, the hills and valleys, the rocky surfaces, are all fractal shaped. I decide to take off and fly to see it up close. I am mesmerized by these patterns, and the psychedelic colors they have and then I almost wake up,
      but instead I have a FA in a totally white empty house. I remember I left my teacher back in the other house and I go around this house calling out his name, hoping to summon him back. Going through some corridor I spot someone that looks like him and other people going after, but when I get closer, it isn't him. But he is also a teacher to these people, who admire him and are respectfully walking him out as he leaves. I am starting to feel the LD fading away, so I decide to get out of here and do my own hing. I find a window and jump to outside. It's again a beautiful landscape with green hills, but this house is right on the slope. I have to climb some moss covered rocks to reach the top of the hill. Some lady who had made some comment to me inside, followed me out the window and insists on asking me something about mind training. Something like, if I feel that realization is a consequence of how much time you practice. If it is an inevitable consequence of your time dedication to practice, because she is feeling frustrated for not seeing results. I don't remember exact words I said, it was very short answer, but it was something in the line of "no, it's not just time related, more about quality and merit."
      Then on the top of the hill I see a valley below, but really far below, like we are many kms of altitude up. I decide to jump and fly some more. I enjoy it for some time, once again absorbing the details of the majestic landscape. Until I start descending and land in some city below. I land in a town square between some classical buildings and there is a giant painting on the floor with a reproduction of some classical work of art. I dig my hands in the floor and have fun picking up elements from the painting and throwing them in the air to watch them slowly fall like confetti. Then I want the painting to become a giant trampoline and I have fun jumping and doing flips in the air.

      When I am done with it, I walk down a street. The LD is weaker and I don't remember exactly what happened but I end up in a TV studio, where a famous morning show is being recorded and I am sitting with the live audience. The show hostess is demonstrating some modern appliances and its uses and we are offered some bread cooked by a bread machine. I taste it and it is completely bland and tasteless. I feel this is boring and once again I aim for a window to change scenario At some corridor outside the recording area, I see a window. I look through it and down below I see a moat or a lake. I am about to jump to it, when I notice it is full of big animals swimming. First they look like crocs, but on a closer look, I see they are mainly big fish, turtles and some mutant creatures, like fish but with tiny arms and hands. I decide to go get the tasteless bread and feed it to the animals. The bread wasn't a lot but seems to multiply as I split it into bits, so I keep feeding the animals for quite a while. Then I wake up. .
    11. 6 Nov: Cruise ships and a cow herder

      by , 11-06-2018 at 04:25 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      Lucidity: ⭐ (1/5)
      Clear: ⭐⭐⭐ (3/5)
      ⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

      With two other girl friends, at a dock, trying to board some big cruise ship. It feels like the 30s, we are poor and these big ships will take us to some new life opportunities. We struggled to get tickets and we struggle still to get on board. The dock is gigantic and there is no clear path to board the ships. Also, there are people randomly goind around in all directions. We finally see what looks like a cargo lift to one of the ships, but it closes doors before we get in and doesn't come back to pick anyone else up. We miss two ships. My friends want to quit, but we persist and we finally manage to board one other ship. Inside it, we have to struggle to get a pod cabin, in an area crammed with pod cabins, because the most tolerable ones are taken by other people. Some are really claustrophobic, because they are in rows and not all have direct access to the main hall, but jammed behind the front pods. After some negotiations we manage to get the ones we like. I enter my pod. I brought one of my cats with me. The pods are actually comfortable once we get inside, but my cat wants to go outside and forces his way out through the door.

      False awakening on my sofa. My dogs barking loudly outside. The tv is on but lights are out.
      I go check through the window what is going on, but I see nothing. I don't realize I am dreaming, I just keep on dreaming.
      I check the time and it's 3 am. The dogs start barking again. I go check again and I see a herd of big cows down the path parallel to my property. Some of the cows are a bit curious and get out of the path in the direction of my gate and my dog Hachi who sleeps outside the fenced area. I go outside to shoo them away. A guy comes up, he seems very relaxed about all of it. He steps inside my gate and brings my dog with him. He has his own big dog, named Lucas or something. I feel nervous, because Hachi is afraid of other dogs and gets aggressive, but the two dogs seem to like each other. I then worry when my other dogs come join the gang, because Hachi and the other male dog hate each other and that's why I keep them separate. But they don't fight. Meanwhile the guy wants to apologize for all the fuss and disturbance and hands me some money. I go get my purse and give him some change through the window. Then my yellow cat runs outside through the window. Tired of all these chaos with my animals, I go pick up the cat who runs away twice and then the white one also tries to escape. The guy doesn't get my attitude with the cats and dogs, So I have to explain to him about their temperaments and fights they had, etc. He finally goes away, and takes Hachi with him outside the gate. Inside the house I go to the toilet and I see myself in the mirror: I have a zombie-like Catrina face painting with green lips. I had no idea I had been talking to the guy like this.

      Updated 11-06-2018 at 04:33 PM by 34880

      Categories
      non-lucid , false awakening
    12. 28 Sep: Blood moon

      by , 09-28-2015 at 02:56 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      I fell asleep thinking of the super moon eclipse, but was too tired to set my alarm clock to wake up to see it, so I thought " maybe I'll wake up to pee and check if the eclipse is happening at that time".
      At some point I started dreaming that I had to wake up to see the eclipse, so I got out of bed, went to the toilet, then realized the figure on the mirror was of a man and shape shifted constantly. I realized I was still dreaming. Tried to wake up again, this time even got outside, but the landscape was a bit off, there was a huge forest and many people gathering around to see the moon, which was big and red. But I don't have such forest near my house. I was still dreaming. I think I had one or two more false awakenings until I finally woke up for good.
      I did a RC to confirm this time I was really awake, I looked to the clock and saw that it was the exact moment of the half-time of the eclipse around here, 3:50 am. I grabbed a coat, went outside and the eclipse was at its peak, with a beautiful red moon in the sky. Still, I had to do another RC, because I kept seeing things quite extraordinary, like a huge dark flying shape in the sky (it looked like a dementor!?) or sparks of light, but I'm in the countryside, there's all sort of animals probably causing those sights: bats, insects... My dogs were pretty excited with my presence and offered me the certainty I was awake when they started biting my ankles.
      Back to bed I had another false awakening, this time I thought I was waking up in my house in the morning, to find that bombs were dropping from the sky and star wars imperial walkers were battling on my land. Then I realized something was not right again, but honestly the impression I had was that dimensions were crossing over, not that I was dreaming. I ran around the house looking for my pets, to run away with them to safety, only to realize that my house was being slowly replaced bits by bits, by different realities, namely other spots in space-time continuum. So, my living room was still intact and normal, but opening a door to my room I would find a street with restaurants, entering the kitchen, it was now some kind of zoo, while on the other side of the house, in the garden, an intergalactic battle was taking place. I felt awed and saddened with the perspective that my house, my haven, my life, would disappear under whole new realities, buildings, events, that would not connect in any way with the memory of me and my loved ones. It was humbling.
    13. 9 May: books of revelations

      by , 05-09-2014 at 05:38 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      I am inside a house, become aware of the dream and go out to a large balcony. It stands over a large pateo with black, white and rose tiles. I dive into it and feel myself sinking into the ground, moving fast through the darkness. Until all is still and there's only clarity.
      In front of me appears a book, as clear as day light. It has a picture on the cover, of a palace in the mountains and a title with a long word, whose meaning I sense but don't know how to translate. I try to memorize it, but I can't. The pages open and I read it. More books follow. I realize they are written in german and italian, for some reason. I feel a connection with Switzerland, but the contents are universal. I give up trying to understand and memorize. It only seems to work well when I read without trying to comprehend. I feel that whatever I am "learning" will be imprinted, even if I don't understand consciously.
      I wake up briefly and go back to lucid dream. I keep on reading. This time the message is clear, it is about the Universe, our solar system, something very specific about Jupiter.

      I have a false awakening and I transmit to my mother the message I just received. Then I realize we're still in a dream.
      I finally wake up. Can't remember any detail about what I read, but I believe it is recorded in my unconscious memory.
    14. 4 Apr: leader of a gang in futuristic world

      by , 04-04-2014 at 11:35 AM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      I fell asleep slowly, keeping my awareness, and the plunge was so subtle, that I wasn't sure when I was already asleep or not and both worlds overlapped for a while. I was clearly already visioning a dream world, but every time I moved my hands to do a RC, I was still moving my "real" hands and not the dream hands. It took me a while to finalize the transition. And when I did, I still wasn't sure in what level of reality I was, because I got up from my dream bed and went to a balcony and clearly the world outside was a very large city and not my hometown, but it was so realistic in all its details and sensations, that I chickened at the thought of flying away from the balcony. I decided to do one more RC just to be on the safe side and not kill myself.
      When I was absolutely sure, then I flew away over a 10-lane highway and for fun, landed on top of a big truck and surfed it.

      I had no clear goal with the dream, so I let the story unfold.
      My stunts attract some attention and I gather a group of misfits and adventurers who follow me as their leader. We become a rebel group on this futuristic mad max style world.
      Some day I meet a guy I don't fully trust, but he is a bad-ass with some skills and I spend some time with him, to see if he fits in our group. We hijack trucks with materials we can use, but we never hurt anybody. But he attacks a truck with a family and kills the parents of a kid and almost shoots the kid. Needless to say, I kick his ass and make sure he never hurts anyone again. Then I adopt the scared kid and take him to our base. We live in a semi-underground tunnel complex on the outskirts of the suburbs. I love this kid very much and make sure he grows up nicely and in a peaceful environment.
      I guess he brings me into maternal mode, because I do much less adventures outside and have become more home-based. I even have a date with a guy and a friend helps me pick up a dress to go out that evening. I leave the kid with a lady who is not human. Her head is hairless and instead is covered in a thick brownish skin with round protuberances of different sizes. But she is the most trustworthy person around, very calm and serene.
      This guy I'm going out with, he's like the Hulk, big and green. The babysitter suggest I should wear a green outfit to match, but I disagree, he might think I'm mocking him.
    15. 24 Mar: karma and the time of my death

      by , 03-24-2014 at 10:55 AM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      (...) An incredible coincidence happens in Riverstone's life, which makes him aware of a mistake he was about to make and puts him on a path that is extremely favourable to him. He makes a comment like he is thankful for the path correction but wondering how many sentient beings will suffer in consequence. I don't understand wht he means and he explains his view that karma balance is in pyramidal hierarchy. The more merits you accumulate the better karma you have but the universe has to balance it by distributing equal ammount of bad karma to those with no merits. "I find that hard to accept. Is karma like entrophy? So what happens when you accumulate endless merits and you tend towards budhahood? The rest of the world plunges into darkness, so you can get enlightened. And then what? Big bang happens?" He just points out that I should see how the beings who are close to enlightnement, magically don't need to worry anymore about providing for themselves, there's always people attending to their needs and that gives them more freedom to meditate and pursue liberation, like in a positive feedback loop.(...)

      (...) A lost man appears at my front door, asking for a place to spend the night. I let him in, he seems harmless. But later on I think he kidnaps me, because there's a gap in my memory and I end up at some place where they seem to be making experiments with humans andhibridation with something else. I watch a baby being born and starting to talk soon after and growing up in one day the equivalent to at least 5 years.
      I wake up and start writing down this dream, just to realize I'm still dreaming.
      Next thing I am trying to escape this place, it's a complex labyrinthic building. They don't lock me up, they just keep me in some living area where others like me are kept to do a seemingly normal life until whatever.
      I find Zilla and some other girl I know among them. I tell them I found a small hatch under some stairs in a discrete place where few people go and invite them to try to escape with me through there. They accept to take a peak. I go inside and find a tunnel that opens up like a funnel and seems like a promising getaway route. But when it's their turn, someone else passes by and they just run away. I decide to go alone and see where it leads.
      I find myself in a different area, where other people are confined, most of them of african descent. I am welcomed by a group of Angolans and one big lady shows surprise when I tell her my name. She says she has a notebook, where she rights down information she gets in her dreams and that recently she dreamt of a girl with my name.
      I get half lucid, not entirely aware I'm dreaming, but very much focused and I can clearly read from her notebook and even when I look at different times, the information on it does not change.
      She shows me the page and it adds up. She wrote my name, my approx. weight in kgs (60), my height in feet (5.4) - and I just had to check online how much that is in meters, cause I use metric system - my day and month of birth and... the date of my death! I was shocked, because it is 14 June 2014. I turn to her "That's just a little more than a couple of months away! It can't be!". She says " I don't make the rules, I just get the information". "So, I do I die?". And she touches me and I have a vision of an accident, some heavy metal piece falling from a scaffold over my head. There is only one thing that does not add up, the year of birth: she wrote 1964 and that is more than 15 years before I was born. I tell her that maybe it's not me, but someone else with my name and older than me. She says, her visions are not always 100% spot on and some numbers might get confused, but if every other number is right, there's good chance it is me.

      So, obviously, I'll avoid any construction site and scaffolds around that day!

      Updated 03-26-2014 at 11:16 AM by 34880

      Categories
      lucid , false awakening
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