Ruesia's Dream Journal

First dream night of 6/19/16. Second dream occurred earlier in June 2016

Bits and pieces of dream fragments. I was at my old home in Denair. I was in the back pasture. I was looking at my neighbors home. Nothing had changed. I was looking around the pasture and just-- home.

Then I was on a trip. We were at a large event. I was with class mates? Peers? We all needed to be seated in fold down seat chairs for the event. I found my spot, the seats were assigned. The seat to my left was vacant. We neared the start of the program and my seat mate arrived. He had prosthetic legs and used braces on his arms to get around. He asked if I could help by folding down the seat for him. Or maybe he didn't ask and I asked him. But, I helped him by pushing the seat down and he was able to ambulate in to the chair. Next thing I know, we are done. The event is over. And we are waiting for the bus to pick us up to take us to our next location.

My seat mate said he wanted to stand up and move around a little bit. So, I offered to stand with him. We were talking. I felt fond. Like he was a brother or a dear friend, even though I barely knew him. It was getting dark out. We were talking like old friends and I remember touching his shoulder and feeling comfortable. Not like we were strangers.

I knew his name was Landon. Somehow. We were quickly becoming friends. And then we heard the bus start and watched it pull away. And I exclaimed and then grabbed my phone. I told Landon not to worry. That they must have just forgotten us. And I called the instructor and told her she'd left us behind. SHe was cross but I explained I was waiting with Landon and he needed to stand up --- because of...yknow. It was awkward. He was standing there with me. She said they'd turn around. I turned to Landon and told him it'd be okay. They were turning around and coming back to get us.

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I was on a trip. My father and sister were there. We were in a hotel room. Had somehwere to go the next day. But we were in San Francisco and I kept begging them to go out with me. Let's go! So I finally convinced them to go see the Golden Gate Bridge with me. We walked. The start of the bridge began as a tunnel, instead of on top of land. There was a special entrance for pedestrians to walk from the tunnel up to the bridge. So, we were walking on the bridge and I was so happy, when suddenly it started to shudder. People started running back toward us. A frenzy. I turned and we all started to run back toward land. The bridge was swaying violently. There was panic and everyone was stampeding. My sister was beside me, my dad behind. As we reached the end of the bridge and to the tunnel, it cracked and water started to bubble up. My sister and I leapt. We all leapt. We came tumbling down on the other side in the little bunker/tunnel. Behind us there were groans of metal and water. Spewing everywhere. A jagged heap of twisted iron. You could hear screams of people trapped. But, the metal continued to sink and then it was just rushing water bubbling around the metal.

It was then I looked around and realized my dad was nowhere to be seen. I turned to my sister and we didn't need to say anything. We didn't have to say a word because we both knew. My stomach fluttered. Emergency crews began to show up and started to put blankets around survivors and I was numb. I couldn't think. All I could think about is how I left him behind. How he'd probably stayed behind to help someone. That I hadn't stopped to make sure he was with us. That I'd just run in sheer blind panic and didn't stop.

The emergency crew said it was too dangerous to go in to the water with the bridge still unstable. They said the bodies were likely gone- under all the sediment and iron. They did not have hopes of recovering them. The personnel began to escort us somewhere else. To a common area so we could continue to process. I made the call to my mom. I don't remember what I said but it was awful. I couldn't stop crying. She was very short and abrupt.

Time passed. And I was still numb. It wasn't real. It hadn't happened. Had it? I went back to visit the site. The bridge had been rebuilt and corrected but they kept the old section there- for memories. I went down to the tunnel and there was a sign up with the names of those lost that day. It wasn't real. I couldn't feel. I just stared at his name on the sign and cried. How could this happen? How could I leave him behind? How could I just selfishly run?

A few days after having this dream, my sister and father were unexpectedly flying across country and had a flight cancelled that caused them to be stranded in Texas. I picked them up and we were watching a Warriors game on TV, who's team logo is the Golden Gate Bridge. I told them about my dream and we considered it a bad omen for the game. The Warriors ended up losing.