RyanIONIC

I basically dreamed that i was at my sister Krissy’s talking to her and my other sister Tanya and i was told that i needed to impersonate a 2-3 year old kid during a trial. I was never told what he had seen or why i needed to testify for him, but the dream involved me impersonating this kid (or trying to. I didn’t do a good job)

I asked my sister Tanya what the kid’s name was, and she told me it was Bam, then she started to laugh. She then handed me an ID with the word BAM written on it in red ink. However, BAM was just a nickname at his real name was almost impossible to pronounce. He apparently had some shitty parents that wanted to give him a terrible name. (The name tag also acted like a score card, tallying up points for the number of random letters and consonants in a persons name. His name was worth a lot of points)

So my mom and I collect the kid from the parents house, and he is in the backseat of her van. We are in a mall parking lot but as we go to drive away I realize that his seatbelt isn’t on, so i get out and put it on for him (which was a struggle) and as i’m getting back into the front seat two homeless women are standing near the front of the van talking with a dog blocking my door. Frustrated of waiting ii tug on the leash a bit, get the dog out of the way, then get inside the van, and as we are driving off i hear the one homeless lady insulting me for grabbing the leash. This was strange. She was pretty much whispering and i heard her from within the van perfectly.
Wanting to correct her, i tell my mom that i was just moving the dog out of the way of the door and that she should repeat that to the women outside. She does, but they make no sign that they heard my mother, so we drive off.

I then make a comment in frustration, saying “well, i was trying to help them. I could have just kicked the dog in the face”, but then i feel ashamed of myself for saying that and i go quiet.

My mom, the baby and I arrive at my grandmother’s and I am given some clothes to change into so that i may resemble the baby. The clothes end up being a white tracksuit that rappers and drug dealers wear. I ask my brother (who is driving us to the courthouse) about this, and he says something along the lines of “Gotta represent”, then he pulls on the tracksuit that he is also wearing.

We arrive at the courthouse and I become very nervous. I know i have to impersonate this kid, but i have no idea how the kid acts, i don’t know what his real name is, and i have no idea what i am even supposed to say. Luckily the “courthouse” is really just a large, circular area, with an inside and an outside, that in some ways resembles my grandparents place.

When we arrive the apparent judge tells the family that we can play videogames in the games room. I look in and see that they have an xbox with a kinect set up. Part of me wants to play it, but i realize that I am supposed to be impersonating a toddler, and toddlers don’t play Xbox. I am a bit saddened by this. I then stand by the van which has shrunken down in size to the point that i wouldn’t be able to sit in it and speak to my family, trying to avoid anyone from the courthouse. The judge i remember wanted me to make a statement, but i was worried about fucking it up.
The dream get’s a little fuzzy around here but at some point this person who was at the courthouse is trying to ask me some question. (The man is played by the heavier, taller kid from Rookie of the year. He also played the clerk who denies selling the kids alcohol in Camp Nowhere)

Not knowing how to respond, i flee around the courthouse, outside into the swamp area, and he pursues me. There is even an instance where he looks out one of the large windows in my grandmother’s house, and his head is massive, taking up the entire window.

I flee into the yard and see my brother, so i follow him through a path that is blocked with a bush, so we have to bend down real low and shuffle under the branches. It’s at this point i think to myself, “Hey, this shit sucks, but at least it is a new experience. My life should feel longer now because of it...”

While shuffling under the bush I accidentally step in cat shit in the grass and become extremely frustrated. It also ends up on my hands so i go inside to wash them with dishsoap, passing by my aunt Darlene sitting in the yard holding the real baby. Why they would bring the real baby there when i am supposed to be impersonating him is a complete fucking mystery, so i walk past annoyed and am once again confronted by the guy trying to ask me question. I try and flee for probably the 3rd or 4th time but am unable to, and he asks me a few more question. I am not sure how the baby would respond, so i try and escape again, and that’s where i think i woke up.

-One thing i remember that was strange was the dude who was asking me questions had a hard time going into the water to chase me. He was afraid that he’d absorb the water and ruin his clothes. I then hacked up and spit into the water and said “my family is better suited for the swamp”. I don’t even know what the fuck that means lol