Serene

This dream wanted me to be lucid because everything was so out of the ordinary. There were four of us in a cave sitting around a large table that appeared to be wood and stone. The stone seats were not comfortable and on the table was a large book with dark skin and the word secrets spelled in brown skin. The entire dream was like past and present mixed. One of the four of us was Billy (a boy from high school who had cancer and was bullied bad. I was very kind to him to try to make up for all of the bad kids. He was not a very nice guy, and was telling teachers what some of the students were doing, and actually starting some of the issues. Shy me had a sit down with him and told him what my opinion was on why he didn't have friends. We were going to work on his skills. He did a remarkable job and after high school wrote a book and kept in touch with me until his death at 20). There were two other men sitting at the table who never spoke (I felt they were fill ins). On the table were 4 packets of information and photos of the people that our mission was about. They were bound with thin leather strips, and looked like an untidy heap of papers of different sizes about 10 to 12 inches in height each. Someone was explaining this but I wasn't really sure where the orders were coming from. There were four weapons on the table also made of black leather and different types, my first thought was they were of some kind of sexual nature lol, no idea what these things were. We were each given a weapon and each one had a silver safety pin on it somewhere which I thought was strange. These weapons looked like ancient weapons, why a silver safety pin? I have never killed anyone in a dream so this was a mystery to me, there is no way this was to kill these people? It came about that the three men already knew the mission, and they knew everything about these four packets. Billy was to explain to me what the mission was. There were two couples, and two men in the packets. I made it clear I was not going to hurt these people. Everyone was silent. I asked about the Secrets book. What is that about?
Billy told me to open it. I pulled it toward me and it was extremely heavy. I was excited and scared. I didn't want to have to kill anyone, and I would NOT. My hairs on my arms stood up as I opened the book. There was no writing inside, but actually flashbacks of memories. When I was 4 the woman bringing me to play with her daughter Jackie to try to teach her how to get along with others. She was a spoiled brat! I tried my best but she was so bad. Her mom wanted her to be more like me. I remember telling her to stop giving her everything she wanted, I was 4 lol!. Then the boy Brandon from 3rd grade who was super smart and had no friends because he was misunderstood. His mom would drive him over and thanked me so much with tears in her eyes for befriending her son, I enjoyed him. He knew everything about the stars, but I had to move away and wondered what ever happened to him. Then Billy. But that was only a few. This book of secrets is showing me who I am and my pattern since I was tiny. It started flashing faces of all of the people that matched this pattern. I looked over at Billy and I asked why am I seeing this? He said, "Your life has always been about spreading love and compassion, this is who you are, how you were born and how you will die."
There was a lot of meaning for me in this one. Some I have no words to explain.