Night Time Musings of Shadowclaw

I am in Central America. I am not sure what country, but there are rainforests. I am there on a research trip with several classmates. We had been to Belize in March (in real life), and we have now returned to Central America for another expedition. We are in the rainforest. It is lush and green, and birds are calling all around us. There are red flowers growing everywhere. It is time to return to our hotel for lunch, so we get on bicycles and ride to the nearest road.

The bicycles are the same kind I rode while in Belize. Simple bikes that require you to back pedal to brake. I find riding the bicycle to be very easy, even while going uphill. Juan, a handsome Costa Rican graduate student who was our nature guide in Belize, is riding behind me. We are on a main road now in a town, heading for the hotel. I am not paying attention to where I am going and I miss the turn to the hotel. Juan follows me and we turn around in a parking lot. We bike up the hill to the hotel, and I don't even break a sweat.

We all place our bikes along the front of the hotel and go inside. We enter the dining room and sit at a large table. Our meal is brought to us, but I don't remember what it was. We eat quickly and return to our rooms. We have the afternoon free to do anything we want. I go up to my room, and realize that Juan is my room mate. He is not in the room, however, and I take a shower. When I come out of the shower, several of the girls are in my room to use the three computers that are in the room. I am annoyed because I want to get changed. I repeatedly tell them to hurry up.

They eventually leave and I decide to put on a black velvet dress with gold trim. The dress has three zippers. One on each side and one in the back. As I put it on and look in the mirror, I realize that I have lost a lot of weight and look really good in the dress. However, I realize that a velvet dress is a strange choice to wear in Central America, since it is always very warm. Nevertheless, I keep it on, and I struggle to zip the back zipper. At this moment, Juan enters the room. He tells me that it is almost dinner time, and I wonder what happened to the afternoon. I get the back zipper closed and turn to look at him. He smiles at me and tells me that the dress looks good on me. I smile and realize why I decided to put on the black dress. I wanted to impress him. I had been overweight while in Belize, and now I had the opportunity to show off my new good looks.

We go down to the dining room to eat dinner, but the scene shifts to the night time. We are back in the room, and I am in my pajamas. There are two full beds in the room, with white bedspreads that have little pink flowers on them. Juan is in bed already, reading a book. I walk to the empty bed and am about to climb into it when Juan tells me that we can share a bed if I'd like. He is extremely good looking and I want nothing more than to be close to him, so I climb into bed next to him. He puts his book down and turns out the lights. We get close to each other, and he is warm, but we don't actually touch each other except for our feet.

As I drift off into sleep, I wake up from the dream. A sound outside the room woke me up. I am still a bit groggy and want to return to the dream. I haven't seen Juan since March, and I won't see him again until I go to Costa Rica in November. Not that we are romantically involved or anything like that, but I miss him and sometimes I wish we were together somehow, because he is an amazing person. I close my eyes and will myself to return to the dream.

I return to the dream, and I am in bed next to Juan. I know that it is a dream, and it is difficult to keep myself there. The dream fades and I wake up, but I manage to return again. I want Juan to put his arms around me and he does. I place my hands on his arms and enjoy the moment, but it is fleeting and the dream slips from my grasp. I wake up and give up on trying to stay in the dream.