StephL

Waited too long to journal, almost everything is gone by now (noon), but I thought why not write that down anyways:

I was going across country, had some goal in mind to go to, but I forgot what that was.
But - the way led through a stall with pigs. And the guys working there and even me only traversing were rendered naked upon entrance, but not for any frivolities, but because one could afterwards easily get clean again by hosing down with a water tube.
Seemed entirely logical in the dream and the pigs were nice...

Another snippet - I went with a friend to a cafe and she found out they have a theater attached and also that taking part there, and generally going into theater would be her new goal in life and she went right ahead and started rehearsals with them.

...
First time WILD!!

This was the most spectacular LD of my life!!

And it was so easy that I almost wondered if it was a WILD, but it was. And I took my bed with me!

Being tired, I lay down for an afternoon nap and got quite lively HHs. Just been watching them, and from time to time imagining doing something physical in the scenery, but I did not get to feel that or enter these HHs, so I just watched dispassionately. When I started to do some mantra self-suggestions twice, the HHs went away, so I stayed without words. It felt as if I could look through my eyelids couple of times, seeing my room, but upon trying to see if it's a dream, I opened them for real, closed them disappointedly and continued.

Suddenly* I still lie on my bed with nose dug in blanket but in space! *(sorry, if that isn't very informative, I know it no better...)

It "stands" there in the midst of nothing, like a cosy theatre balcony for galactical audiences - and before my eyes stars are roiling and surging every which way, uncountably many, so dense from time to time as if they were spray, foam on the waters of vacuum.

A black hole comes rolling through, swirling and drawing in my space and sweeping up my stars, but it passes the bed by and disappears to the left side of infinity.

Checking data for Sageous' memory thread, all accessible, without effort. I know I am in the bed, I am in for real, where it actually stands and when, that I took it for a ride into my lucid dream, blanket and all. I also knew what I did before lying down - also in hindsight this was satisfactory - correct actually. But I was of a fuzzy, dreamy mind anyway, like when not sober, you can anyway remember who you are. Usually.
Then I imagine two galaxies like on the pictures I have, but my dream has other ideas for a while.

Instead windows open in space to other space, star-density reducing to a realistical view. And then another window and another and another, and I fly my bed through them all, clutching my blanket.

And so I enter a space with distant round disks rotating slowly and sparkling with colour and I "brake" my bed.
A huge tornado of space clouds appears to my left, spiralling around a centre of black with alarming speed. Looking very much like this:



Ah I think, this is the action I'm here for! Now where is the other one?
I get drawn closer and closer and lose my bed and start to race around the centre myself until I feel dizzy with dream-vertigo! Like an unbidden joke it comes to my mind, that one shouldn't throw up in space, if at all avoidable, even without a spacesuit, but it does not come to that.

Again I draw on the pictures I have, like this one:



My galaxy is all black and white, and it seems to understand me wrongly. I want another galaxy, so what it does is parting into two - it sprouts something like a feeler made of stars and births another smaller galaxy, like running the above with the arrow of time pointing in the wrong direction.

Well - I admit it wasn't as spectacularly beautiful as the real thing above, but I was and still am blown away anyway and definitely.

I think, this is no good, beautiful but wrong way round. I leave it happening, but once the baby galaxy dislodges itself - I draw it back in, meanwhile I am the swirl myself, I lose my human body and become star-cloud, sprouting out another feeler, this time I actually feel the draw of gravity I have and thus catch my baby back into the fold. With a plop. Hukif's call, but I guess this was the same as two different galaxies colliding, mechanism-wise.

Then I get drawn out of being the plane and see my galaxy from above and fading out and I wake up.
The only thing, which could have possibly topped this amazing trip would have been colour in birth and collision.

WOW!!

Just for doing any journalling at all:
I keep dreaming of knowing a place in the Bavarian mountains where a half-overgrown old ruin of a wooden house stands, forgotten and far off and I move in and sort it out a bit, make it beautiful, tend to the plants around.
And live there secretly, often in a kind of escape from something else.

I wonder how much congruence there really is from dream to dream about this house, it evolves I would say. And I love it.

While I'm very busy irl, I've not been giving much thought to LDing at all, but yesterday something spectacular happened - just for two seconds, unfortunately.

I got lucid when the relatively vague normal "dream-scape" suddenly exploded at me into a real place.
Full sensory immersion, like my very first adult lucid, such tangibility and mental clarity as well.
But I got over-excited, that didn't happen for a long while actually, but usually I have to "work" on getting the dream truly realistic, and I almost never fully succeed - so this overwhelmed me.
Nothing special in terms of scenery - me on a summer meadow.

Then this night again, I noticed an inconsistency, but couldn't vocalize to a DC, I wanted to tell it to.
Optics were rather vague and I made a stupid mistake - I tried to open my dream-eyes a bit wider - bam - seeing my room, wide awake.

Maybe now with journalling I'm a bit more prepared for if it comes again tonight.

Veery strange. What I remember is being in a huge flat, very high ceilings, and there stood a maybe three/four meter big faun about. He didn't do something at first, was just there, like a huge devil, but in brown and not making an evil impression at all. Rather like being some sort of prehistoric faun, megalo-faun or something.
Huge brown-furred legs...

I asked a woman, what he would be doing there and she said, he belongs to the story, we would be filming. Instantly I was also in the know, ah - riight - that faun from the story. Meanwhile I was only surprised, why it would be in this specific scene, where I thought he wouldn't be. Instant explanation from her: yeah - but the audience loves him, we put in more material with him.

Some this and that and then the faun suddenly comes up to me, and grabs me, and seems to want to take a closer look at me, lifts me up into the air, and I get really afraid all of a sudden, and loose optics, and then I get lucid.

I guess it was fear, what had eradicated all optics - I just hung in the void. Tried all the pretty tips for optics, wipe my eyes, pretend to take a hood away and put glasses on - nope. Woke up from that.

Shame I hadn't really prepared myself for a DEILD re-entry - might have worked nicely...

Been waking up several times on my own last night, and used two of them to do some self-suggestions - and tadaa - lucid!
It was an optically beautiful dream, all was shiny and sparkly and had intense colours, like I unfortunately don't have it so often. It was so beautiful, that I refrained from trying any tasks for a while and just flew about in a city with lots of old-fashioned houses and trees and little gardens and parks.
There was a VW-beetle, cream-coloured, and I used to have one as a student, so I landed and boarded and drove about a bit, first lucid driving ever. Much too smooth for a real beetle, it drove itself more or less, but it was a great memory of the good old times...

Quite astonished over the duration, I decided okay - this is the time, when I finally get it right after maybe 5 or 6 fails at Maxis' dare.
So there I was, standing in the street, and ordering a lighting storm. Came almost instantly, got dark in the process, and first I thought, it's going to end like the last times, just no one bolt dared touch down on me.
But I really gave it my all, hands reaching to heaven, beckoning, imagining myself transforming from getting hit, too.

And then I got hit!!
A bolt maybe only 5 cm in diameter, but it struck me directly in my outstretched right hand and went through my body.
The sensation wasn't overly strong, but I did feel electricity shoot through me and into the ground, it was a tingling, sizzly feeling, completely pain-free but astonishing. Maybe it worked, because I had imagined how it would feel directly in the dream, before the beckoning.

My field of vision almost went into the sort of total white-out I had experienced when the real episode of me almost getting struck happened, but not quite. Not as mercilessly bright and overwhelming as it had been in reality.
I had concentrated on transforming into a cat, too, besides surviving, I imagined a great cat, one for which I wouldn't have to loose mass from my human physiology, imagining a small cat wasn't helpful I had decided.

And what I got was a sort of spiky white fur, half electricity, half real, I felt my body distinctly differently, but I woke up before I could go on exploring further, what it was I had transformed into. But looking out from my face, I could see all the spikes coming out of naked me, maybe 10 cm long and in patches, not evenly, there was skin visible between them. Fur seems to be the most easy thing for me, when it comes to transformation.
Almost the only thing, I ever got from attempts, to be honest. Well - and once a beak.

Very satisfying long lucid!

Well - yeah.
Stupid, sort of - I really wanted to go on dreaming, what I was dreaming, wanted to get back to somebody's house.
So I got lucid and tried to fly there. But I got stuck in mid-air - nothing went forward nor backwards, just me hanging there and trying to air-swim. It wasn't really full lucidity, maybe that was why - only thing on my mind was getting back there and I woke up from my futile efforts. Shame.

I got lucid in a very weird way last night - I had watched the series 'The Prisoner' and in my dream "Number 2" appeared and was very suspiciously trying to talk me into something. The actor of Gandalf, by the way. And I realized it, somehow I knew this was from fiction and I concluded I must be dreaming.

So I turned away and walked out of the house. There was a wooden chest on the porch and I convinced myself of pumpkins having been stored there. Opened up - yep - pumpkins. It kind of never ceases surprising me how stuff is so easy to dream up. Classical big orange ones - I took one out and pried the top loose, which was easy, too. But to my disappointment there was only pumpkin-mush in it. I remembered reading about somebody having dug into it and found more, so I did that and indeed, there was more - just nothing exciting. Several black relatively flat and shiny stones of a diameter of maybe 5 cm.
Na well...

From the Lucid Dares thread:

...Meanwhile I undertook further vain attempts at lucid dying last night..

Seems I have a wet patch! No innuendo this time, but I got lucid, sort of, three times last night. First time I let myself be fooled into thinking, it wasn't a dream after all, second time woke me up almost immediately - but I was prepared for the third time.
And for killing myself.

It started with a scene, that should have creeped me out, but didn't. There was something like a woodpecker-toy high on my shelf - not sure, if you know what I mean - a wooden bird on a spring and when you bend it back, it starts hacking away at the base it's mounted on.
It was the size of a dove, though, and started hacking all on it's own, like in a poltergeist movie, where toys turn vicious. But I was just curious and took a look. That was a hint at surreality already, I must have levitated to get that close a look. Suddenly it started hacking away at an angle and left the base and then I did find it a little creepy. But the insight that this really should be a dream came quite fast. And this time I did an RC, not just scanning about for inconsistencies like the first time. Yepp - lucid. First of all I looked out of the window into the night and summoned my lightning storm - worked great, but again it was a silent one. Same as back then with my meteors, completely silent impacts. I read somewhere that it might be a natural security measure not to dream acoustical uproar which could drown out dangerous real life noises and one won't wake up. Makes sense.

Anyway - out the window I flew and in high hopes for disaster.
I did something which I never tried before - rolling on my back in mid-air and hovering there as if supported by an invisible cloud. There was lightning going on directly over me - but the bolts didn't come down. I only saw flickering light-points, where they seemed to start touching down, but they never did. Shame, I didn't think of Hukif's lovely galaxy dare then. It could have worked from there - I felt a bit like lying on my back on the floor of a planetarium gone mad in overdrive - watching stars dance about hectically. Quite beautiful, but also non-lethal to my dismay.

So I thought - okay - falling wasn't meant to be my cause of death, but lets at least try something.
And I just dropped. I wasn't afraid, because I went down still looking into the sky and didn't see the ground rushing up at me. Yeah - but it also didn't really work - I landed spread-eagled but without any pain and sort of softly. I felt a bit of impact, but that sure as anything was no suicide. And I wasn't a cat, either.
I'm going to keep at it, though! I really, really want to get hit, dammit!

I guess, I'll soon deserve a badge for most prolific lucid lightning produceress, if I go on like this - need to count how many times I tried it already...

Nicely enough I had a bit of dreaming time left even after that, but I didn't try for dares any more then. No clue what graced my night with three opportunities; it would be more productive, informative, if I could say I had worked on it, or took something - but nope - out of the blue.

__________________________________________________ __________________________________________________

Second time of my life to get lucid several times in one night - first time was four short LDs during the comp, while I did daytime work and was regularly and rather extensively journalling.
First instant from last night wasn't really lucidity - it was me suspecting, and strongly, that I was dreaming by noticing inconsistencies, like not being able to look out of a window. The view was just exactly like my optical problems in lucids, which are thankfully getting less bad and less common lately. But I was silly enough to really concentrate on the view instead of RCing and when it finally fell into place I concluded it wasn't a dream after all.
As said above - the second one was lucidity but I woke up directly after the insight.


Plus - I identified a new dream-sign: coloured pencils!
Last night it was the fourth time I'm aware of that such a thing appeared completely out of context. I was walking along in a park, and found one lying on the ground. High quality looking and a beautiful dark red - so I snatched it up and took it with me to the amusement of my company.
"You really can't resist collecting trash, now can you?"
Ignorance I say to this - there are treasures to be found in trash more often than one might suspect!

This was kind of funny and new: The dream didn't go my way, and suddenly I got aware of the fact, that I am already aware that it is a dream. I tried to will a person to come back by concentrating. Only when that didn't work did I really get lucid then. And optics were very nice - hence I more or less just wandered about where I was - a street with pre WW1 houses with little gardens up front and trees.
But before walking away I turned round to see, what the plaque at an entry-way said, because before getting lucid I had read a name there. And the name was still the same upon looking again, but after first reading instantly started to morph in my direct sight - to a string of numbers finally.
Bit sad I didn't get to do something - it ended in a white-out, optics disappearing slowly from the edges.

This was number 60!!

Too lazy to record my other dreams, but it was a very colourful night again, riding camels through Bavaria, where Israeli Shekel were suddenly the currency, and in dream I thought they belong to Egypt. I actually thought, I would suddenly remember that Bavaria has a border with Egypt and how practical camels would be in the mountains...
Endless rows of old women with trolleys, selling flee market things out of them, some sort of criminal story, with girls getting abducted, and me having myself abducted, too, to help them. Didn't do any good - some naughty stuff happening instead.

Aanyways - I journal because I got lucid on a street, and I hadn't even planned for that, but in dream I remembered, that I had still not done really everything for Percy's dare without shoving and "trampling" people while manically shouting I would be late.

So I did that, without the clock this time - kicking and shouting and shoving people, didn't know how to accomplish "trampling" them without knocking them out, and that seemed too drastic somehow.
Most didn't react initially, some looked really annoyed, but didn't fight back. Quite the opposite - throwing myself into a thick throng of people lead to - well. To what bodily contact in lucidity almost always leads with me...
In the end it was an absolutely overwhelming street orgy - all I could see were people in various states of undress and action, so when in Rome...
Woke up pretty wired from that - but didn't wake up "too early" this time - that's a new one, actually.

Unfortunately did I wake up with a jolt, much too late, and found my husband had - well - done something that made me properly angry. So I was distracted from remembering my dreams of last night, and they really were something special.
What I remember:

I was in a sports-hall with a group of maybe 20 people and we were rehearsing a choreography, dancing.
When I went out to the loo, I saw colour pencils on the wall in the hallway, took them in with me - and somebody explained they were magical things, and one could write with them in empty space, in 3D.
So we did that - we connected all the dancers with a net of colourful shining thin lines, also connections to the room.

And then danced again. I felt all the other bodies - it was as if we were all one dancing organism, parts of a whole connected by these lines.
Amazing - never dreamt something like this before. It's even difficult to describe exactly what this was like - alien and beautiful, that is true for sure.

But again for some reason I shy back from daytime practice.
Not that I had a lot of time these last days - as can be seen with my almost not posting on here - but anyway - I need to get my act together.

There were other very intense and beautiful dreams that night - but this was extraordinary...

Originally Posted by StephL

Soo Percy - I found the watch!!
I've been also running and shouting like a maniac - but unfortunately in lack of a city and people to trample.
But it's a start. Got lucid because of a suspicious total lack of clothing once more, and first I tried to change that, tried to summon clothes upon me, but that didn't work. So I crawled once more into such bushes, as I had found the schoko bunny in last time. And there it was - maybe 30 cm in diameter white and golden, Roman numbers and with a ridiculously thin chain, like you would find it on a normal watch for the pocket.
While forgetting about it - I had unconsciously acquired a dress - so up I went out of the shrubbery and running over a meadow and shouting how I would be late.
I'm afraid I woke myself up with the latter - before any city was in sight. I might even have shouted for real.
Sigh...
Well - next time the shouting will commence once I'm among people to scare and trample over.

I would also say, I have enough to do with my remaining three dares - soo - please block me for now ~Dreamer~! Thank you!

Yepp - that was that. We've got a visitor from Wales since two days - that's sort of an excuse for not doing more, almost nothing to be honest, this more or less just fell into my lap. Bit ashamed about that, the me..
I also remember normal dreams, but it feels right now that it would be a bit too personal to get deeper into that.

Yepp - now I promised it mainly to myself in the title - and so I'm going to do it!
Helps me to announce things, makes me feel inconsequential and lazy, if I don't then.
Would be stupid to let it out for a third day after having gained wiiinx and even bonus ToTM after session #1.
This night it's going to be working an my dares again!
And no watching telly before going to bed...



Last night. Well.
I've been watching three episodes of Sherlock with my sick husband, who is meanwhile addicted to the series - same as I am.
Last one was The Hound of Baskerville - and believe it or not, me, who is usually so happy about reporting no classical nightmares - I had a nasty one. Several actually, after the below I had another one with an "unholy" creature.

The first was not directly connected to the episode, it was about aliens hiding in human bodies, and it was hard to discern who is who, and I was hunting them between them hunting me. What was great was that in one scene, I was swimming like a world-champion, faster and faster - and in another I was running after these aliens, hunting, and I was soo fast - was really like in a movie, where somebody is a superhero or something. Could have made me lucid, since I marvelled at my abilities and didn't produce an in-dream explanation, except that it was important to catch them before they would infest the world by breaking out of a research facility. The weird thing was, that I later on dreamt, I would be lying down to sleep, problem still not completely under control, but I did lie down for some reason, to rest. Then I dreamt, I would start getting nightmares and wanted to stop falling asleep, which didn't work. That was not at home, I fought against sleep in a side-room of a lab.
So what I was aware of was sleeping in a dream, believing that waking up would put me back in that side-room. So it wasn't lucidity as such, weird phenomenon...

Then suddenly I knew, I was in my room, and that my husband was in the room next door, and still I fought against sleep.
I got my eyes open, I think, but what I saw was a very threatening darkness with an inexplicably malign presence.
Man I was soo afraid, seriously terrified, I was feeling "sure", there were evil entities hidden in the darkness, viscerally sure.
I was sufficiently awake, that the idea of SP crossed my mind, but it didn't even help against the fear to finally intellectually understand, that it was indeed SP.

So then I tried moving, esp. shouting for my husband - with that I broke it after a little more terrified struggling.
I went to the toilet, and suddenly I thought it frightening, that he would never hear me, he doesn't hear me when I shout full out over in my room, once he's on his re-breather and sleeping.
I was somehow still feeling endangered by the rest of my sleep - reason didn't really help a lot, even when fully awake and in the light.

After calming down a bit - I thought okay - you've been "hoping" for SP when trying to WILD - so go ahead and try that.
I could stand it maybe only one minute. Closing my eyes and letting go brought this menacing "living" darkness back, I almost couldn't take it. And then that blasted Hound turned up - in the series it's a hallucinogen, which enhances imagination which produces the effect, one sees a monster in a real dog etc.
Well - it didn't help to know it was an illusion, that even the inspiration had been such. I put the light back on and wandered about a bit, before daring to lose waking consciousness again - all the while scolding myself for being irrational.
I can only shiver when I think of such an experience on the basis of actually believing in the supernatural, thank goodness I don't.
What a shame, if I were a bit less of a coward, I believe I could indeed have made a re-entry of some sort into that state, maybe because I was somehow still in REM mode.
Na well - as said, this is maximally unusual for me, maybe next time with some practice..?

But, but...

Anyway - nice demonstration that in a sleepy state, reason loses against instinct and with a vengeance.
And also nice demonstration, that knowing that I sleep in some sense, in a nightmare, and actively fighting for wakefulness does propel me into a "body still asleep" in SP. Makes sense.
Last time I had that in such an intensity was almost 20 years ago, trying to wake up from my first adult lucid dream/nightmare - other story. How come I was able to know, I was dreaming, but not in the least thinking about staying and doing something with it? Well - all that I wanted was getting the hell away and out of it as far as possible...

Soo - while I stupidly didn't yet sit down and do the meditation/visualisation/incubation - I've studied ~Dreamer~'s materials and started out with some "easy" things like RCing and dreamsign awareness and following her tips for recall and using her mantra in a mini WBTB.

And tadaa - first little lucid episode in two weeks!
So today I'll really sit down and take it seriously and take time for it!!

When waking up first time, I really kept still and eyes closed and so forth, like recommended, and such I have quite unusually a full dream from earlier in the night.

Singing for Obama

Obama was visiting Germany, and I was still in school. And the plan was to sing for him, me and another girl were on a platform in an amphitheatre and supposed to sing a duet.
Before us was another pair doing rehearsals, and all went well, but when the two of us stood there, the "technicians" to our sides let us down. It was because they didn't like us - but in the end, that came out and they got a row and we got to try it out and it went nicely. It was only in between clear that it also was only rehearsals and the theatre still empty.
Then they said we had a little time like in a school break before it started for real, and I was happy, thought I'd make it home to put on some make-up and other clothes. So I went, and I got there in seconds and with a little quibble with my mother as disturbance, managed to be happy with how I looked and wanted to get back there.
Of course the way was endlessly long and time running out and I tried quite desperately to run back there, it snowed and snow lay everywhere quite high. Then I managed to make a taxi stop, but it had another passenger and I had to fight with him verbally until he agreed to me getting dropped off first. Lots of running and hectic and despair - but somehow I managed it back on that platform and the theatre was full and Obama was there - and I woke up. No real singing for a real audience - na well.
Shame - maybe I could have recorded a bit of the melody upon waking again, if it had ended with the music...

Ugly fragment:

I was with the parents of my very first boyfriend, he wasn't there, but it was implied that we had an affair.
The mother was quite nasty to me - and I asked her, what she would say, if I told her we would be together again and in love (which we weren't). She totally flipped and told me how I was unworthy and why, and how she even would never ever let me look after his young brother, maybe 4 years old. His father sat on the sofa and was rather surprised by it all.
But it really, really hurt what she said to me.

Strange motorcycle and wasps and police:

First I was with a friend looking at her horses, and she promised me, I could ride with her soon. Then - and again it happens - then I was driving to Munich in order to get to exactly that flat from last night, the one with the aspiring porno-stars - I even dreamt a real address both nights.
But I came from outside of Munich and drove a totally weird motorcycle - I had to hold the front wheel between my feet and the handlebar wasn't connected to anything either. I've been explaining this to myself while driving and later on to a policeman, who helped me cross the autobahn with 6 lanes, because I missed an exit. Seemed all totally technically feasible - soo typical..
When I stopped with him for a chat, I had to constantly check for a bunch of wasps flying around and I made one angry, but we got around getting stung by playing dead. He told me about a case of his, and how a burglar he was hunting, was connected to a late terrorist attack and how proud he was to now work for counter-terrorism. But he didn't know the address, even while it's impossible to know Munich but not that place. Anyway - there are more such mini and banal things I remember, but I'm too lazy now...

My mini lucid moment:

Well - unfortunately I don't know, where this belongs. I think it was a different dream again, not the above mentioned stuff. Fact of the matter was, that I stumbled over something and fell. Like straight out - would have normally resulted in hitting the ground in full length, face first and hard.
But - I didn't. Hit the ground that is - I ended up hovering maybe 3 cm over the ground and looking at the pebbles.
Ah! This is a DREAM!!
Last I know is that I tried to airswim away from there, but it didn't work. My feet were dragging on the ground and I didn't manage to gain height. Somehow I must have lost lucidity then, because I can't remember anything after that.

This is soo encouraging - I didn't get lucid for a full two weeks and now after only a little bit of effort - tadaa!!
Thank you so much ~Dreamer~!!
Today sitting down and working on it properly it's going to be!