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    1. 28 May: Kidnapped friend's kid, puppies in Mexico and meeting a god

      by , 05-28-2019 at 03:33 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening


      I meet Laura, think she is in some kind of trouble and needs to hide. One of her kids is in the hands of some bad individuals, which we we manage to locate and bring to our place with the kid (an office at a university). We fight and the baby ends up falling down a window. Luckily there is a mattress below and he is projected onto a cradle that happens to be in the middle of the street, in a perfect safe landing. We want to go get her immediately but there are lots of passer byes who call the police and we are unable to retrieve the baby, because for some reason, despite the kid being hers, Laura is not exactly in good terms with the law and they can't know that she is trying to get her baby. Then the police comes knock at our door and start an absurd interrogation. The office is quite messy, because we fought there with the bad dudes and they find a book about birds on the floor and start asking us scientific names of birds to prove a point. But I know quite a few bird names and say I have them in my land, hence my interest in the book. I don't understand where they are going with that. They leave and can't connect us with the kidnappers or the flying baby.

      In Mexico with mom and another girl. We attend some expo in the outskirts of Mexico City. On return we find some people providing care to street puppies. One has a horrible thing in the eye but they remove instantly. It's painful to see because they don't use any sedative, but then we see the puppies after care and they are all fine, cleaned and healed. They are all black and with white spots, a bit scruffy. My mom holds and kisses one that is totally black. They will be returned back to the street and we feel so sad but we can't take them with us. We hope for the best for the puppies.

      As we walk down the street, a very poor area, we feel a bit uneasy, but I focus on the beauty of their simple way of life and how nobody is disturbing us, so the fear goes away. I feel the presence of my guru and I become lucid.
      I open a tear in the sky, just trying to get out of the dream, but from it comes out a god, a very hunky guy, who throws green energy blasts at me, apparently challenging me. It doesn't affect me, I fly towards him and kick him on the side. He is projected and although he laughs at me he stays on the ground. And then hold I his hand and I kiss it, saying I love him.
    2. 23 Apr: Bullies, babysitting and a sexual fantasy with Eva Green (graphic)

      by , 04-23-2019 at 09:28 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      I watch a friend bringing his gay boyfriend home for a dinner with the family. Family is unaware they date, and maybe even that he is gay. So it comes as a great shock when they casually mention it. Also, the guy had a recent drug problem and his parents are highly controlling it and all hell breaks lose when he shares that his boyfriend is a meth addict in recovery. They leave the dinner and go to the train station, it is raining and they kiss and make out. A train arrives and some guys that usually bully them get out from it. The couple decides to walk away and avoid them.
      Then I am caught in the action, as I stand in their way to allow the guys to escape. The bullies get pissed at me. I escape, but later I am in school and they bully me at the sports field. I don't feel fear, but I want to expose them, so I find a way to record them bullying me. They mock me, force me to do push ups and other silly things as they say intimidating things and somehow I end up naked from waist up. But I feel pleased because I got footage of it and pictures of the 4 guys. I run to the house of a friend. At her window is Conan Osiris (the musician) who is apparently her friend and looks surprised to see this girl running in topless. They borrow me a blanket that I use to cover myself and then everybody feels more comfortable to hear what I have to say. Then we make a plan to show these images the next day to some teacher or the director.
      But the next day there is something going in the school behind closed doors at the auditorium, some presentation or so. Outside in the lobby there are many strange machines like ATMs and we are told by a lady at a desk to take a machine with us and join the presentation.

      Late night with my mom at a retail shop to buy a blanket for some baby. The shop closes and we are the only ones left. I am actually excited we might spend the night in there, but a worker spots us and tells us to go towards the exit. We argue we haven't yet found the blanket and because it is for a baby, she feels moved and helps us finding it. Then we take it home to the baby, which we are just taking care of and I have no idea who the mother is. I fall in love with the little one, but I get disappointed that he rejects all the food I give him. My mom feeds him chocolate desserts and it's the only thing he'll eat. I argue against it, but she says it's too late to break the habit. I say if it was my kid I'd cut all sugars.

      Watching and then taking part of a Tarantino movie, so excited with how awesome it is. I am walking into a heavily guarded compound to talk to some bigshot, who happens to be played by Eva Green. I have to exit the building to an interior garden and have to meet her at the garden house, which is also heavily surrounded by guards. I am led by an attendant. First the girl goes in with a dress to hand over to Eva. I hear that she doesn't like as much as she likes the attendant's own dress, but accepts it anyway. Then I am allowed to go in and my first thought is how incredibly hot she is and I hope she changes the dress in front of me. She doesn't but anyway we don't talk much.
      I simply go towards her and grope her. I grab one of her breasts and suck it through her thin clothes. (I'm not a lesbian, but I just find her the hottest and most beautiful woman and I would definitely do her ). Then something bizarre happens and I become her! Now I am horny for myself. I start to undress in front of a mirror and I suck my own breasts (a dream ability I have!). I touch myself while admiring my goddess-like beauty. I am not Eva Green anymore, I transformed into a Buddhist deity, even more beautiful and irresistible. I can't hold up the hornyness anymore and I find a rubber toy on the table and I use it for my pleasure.
      Some guard comes in and sees me, but I am not disturbed by it, nor do I feel like having him join. He feels awkward and slowly walks out in silence. I continue pleasing myself in front of the mirror and I climax gently and continuously and feel an amazing sensation of well-being rushing through my veins (not just in the dream, I actually had an orgasm in RL).
    3. Monday, April 8

      by , 04-10-2019 at 07:10 AM
      I am in what I think is a smaller climbing gym inside a shopping mall. I am going to climb, and I feel good, like Iíve been back in it or something. I notice one other guy, sort of larger guy with longer back hair. I think his shirt is off. I think his presence makes me self conscious. I am climbing but it is also like I am clocked in as security at JCPenney. I start moving quite a few shoe boxes that turn out to be empty. I canít believe that many would be stolen. I have my radio on, and Iím getting called to do something. Entering the shopping mall, I am running. I clear a few longer steps quickly and then slow down self consciously. I think I am following the middle school boys (what stole watches and socks the other night). I enter another clothes store and am walking around inside when I notice their security or associate following someone. He simply asks the person if he is going to buy something. At this point, I think Iíve lost who I was following or they are no longer an issue. Now, I am in the shopping mall, probably in a little communal area, with some unfamiliar? others. They are asking me if I got dirty or something like that. I look at the back of the pant leg on my Leviís (that looks like mine but a little darker and newer) and there is a little bit of caked on mud. I think Iíve just washed them though, as the rest of them look clean. I glance up and notice that everyone in my view is wearing blue jeans of the same darker blue jean blue. Now, I am in some dim amphitheater-like room. There are large steps of stone and pebble that descend and end at a very small pool. I am running down these steps as well (possibly in slow motion?) At the end, I jump into the circular pool. While in midair, I had humorously asked if there were rocks at the bottom of the pool (concerned about my landing and impact). This pool could probably only fit four people comfortably, and it is between warm and lukewarm. There is a baby (in a diaper, I think)and one other in this pool. Now, I am driving. It looks like S. Virginia under the overpass, right before McCarran. I see multiple people in the street in front of me. Theyíre walking this way. Slightly annoyed, Iím going to change lanes to go around them to the right. Before I can, they sort of separate to give me room to get through. I notice that they have brooms or mops, so I slow to a stop by them and crack my window. The guy wants to wash my car. I say no and gesture by waving my hand in front of my neck. When I start to drive away, I see the rest of the group on the side of the road to the right. They look very sketchy, like prison-hardened. This impression is based on their face, neck, hand, and everywhere else tattoos, clothing, and also the look in their eyes. I feel bad for saying no because I donít want them to feel bad or like Iím judging them. As I am driving off, I look at my hood and see that it is a little dusty but not really dirty. I am now on a more rural/residential road. There is snow, only on the houses and yards and not on the road. The area seems somewhat lower income; the houses are smaller and just slightly dilapidated, but nice enough. They are spaced nicely apart. It is sort of like I donít really know where I am but do know where Iím going (or vice versa?). I now pull into the driveway of a house. This house is definitely unfamiliar, but I am walking up to its door and I have pliers or some sort of tool in my hand. There was a walkway in front of the house, to the right of the garage, leading to the front door. I donít know what lives here, but I am going to go in. I think I am about to use the pliers when I hear someone coming to open the door. I throw the pliers to the side lawn as the door is being opened. The door opens, revealing an old woman. I am hoping she doesnít notice the pliers lying on the grass. I am going inside with her now, and it is like she knows me. Behind the door she let me through is a foyer/entryway type area that seems to be outside but covered. It sort of then blends into the inside. She starts talking to me, and I think she thinks Iím her grandkid. Iíd feel bad if that was the circumstance, but it almost feels like I am her grandkid. There is an old man in here, sitting at a computer. He says hi to me like he knows me too. We talk a bit, and I then realize it is Opa. I notice his eyes, and I notice his voice is the same. He is wearing blue sweatpants and has his feet up on the swivel chair. His mannerisms are exactly the same. I am about to leave now, as I think thereís something I have to do (write down this dream?), when Granny?/Reta shows up. Now I am kind of stuck here. We all talk for a bit until I can sneak outside. I walk outside to my car blocked into the driveway and Makayla just getting here. I notice Dadís truck. The right side of the driveway is a bit more open, but I donít think I could get out. Jon shows up now, wearing a sun hat, shorts, and a button up short sleeve. Weíre all inside, a gathering of everyone, and I think Iíll be here a while.
    4. 1 Mar: Lawrence of Arabia, project meeting, trapped and babies

      by , 03-01-2019 at 08:43 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      I am Lawrence of Arabia, female version. On a train with westerners and arabs. The train is diverted to a remote village, hijacked. We are taken along. I confront the thieves, but they present me their arguments and we end up staying there, both as prisoners and guests. The men want me and women hate me, both because I am very voluptuous and attractive. I am accompanied by two ladies who are always covering me and blocking the men's looks.

      At some strategy meeting, Clara is talking, presenting a project and asking for backup. Everybody rejects it and turns away. I am the only staying and supporting it. She gives up and rips the papers apart and goes to a bar next door. She leaves her purse and camera behind, so I grab her things and meet her at the bar, which is more like a coffee shop and other friends I know are there too with her. Somehow she is surprised that I brought her stuff. Including money she had left on the table.

      At my far, the gate is broken, some of my dogs are out. My dad is fixing it from the inside, I go outside and block it with something so that the dongs don't run away. When I turn away, I am now on an apartment of which I can't find the exit door. On the bathroom I see a ghost. It tries to lock the door and trap me, but I manage to escape.
      Some brazilian dude rings the bell and I finally find the door. He is pushing some campaign and offers me cake. wants to come inside. I say the house is haunted and he still offers to go inside and check it for me. But I choose walking out instead.

      At my university campus, some celebration with live music and tents. I am trapped under and inside one. I try again going outside but they engulf me. I fly through the ceiling, but don't get outside, just to a different place, like an office. At this office, people have their dogs and cats with them. I pet some of the animals. Then some lady has two babies and asks for my help. They are adorable. One had vomited and the other needs her eyes cleaned up. I tell the mom to go get proper cleaning products while I take care of the babies who fall asleep in my arms.
    5. Saturday, February 2

      by , 02-15-2019 at 11:27 PM
      I am outside and climbing up a fairly small rock face that seems to be above a washed out gully (with a small trickle of water, I think). It is definitely tall enough to where I should have a rope, though Iím pretty certain I donít. Itís probably 20-30 feet tall. I donít think I have climbing shoes on either. The stone is a sort of glossy, but not entirely slick, bronze. It contains more features than inset holds; theyíre pretty large and secure feeling. Towards the top, though, I think I come across loose sections. I try to break off a large undercling. When I summit, Iím relieved to have made it without falling or having a hold break on me. Now, I am in a bathroom and looking in a mirror. I mustíve been wearing a tank top, as my neck, collar bones, shoulders, and arms are burnt to a bright red. The fact that Iím sunburned really irritates me.




      I am inside some building, a department store?, with Melissa. Sam is here, but besides her I donít see any other people. Sam is at the bottom of an escalator (the up escalator, I think), but I donít think itís moving at all. She is crouched down; there is an infant one to two steps above her. It is in need of a diaper change, which is what Sam is attending to. The child (a boy) is supine, the diaper open, some of the excessive amount of excrement in a clump a few steps below Sam. I donít even see wipes or a new diaper. Sam appears flustered.
    6. Monday, January 28

      by , 02-12-2019 at 05:44 AM
      I am in some room, open and airy, yet almost a room that feels like it should be smaller (I canít tell if itís more of a gym or a bedroom, or some combination of both). There are only two others here: Allison and Harper. I am sitting on the floor, my legs straight out in front of me. Thereís a small gap between them, in which Harper sits. Sheís nestled between my calves, facing me, holding onto my hands. I tilt her to the side, as if Iím going to let her fall, before moving her back to an upright position. I watch as each tilting brings a smile to her face. Meanwhile, Allison is out on the floor and throwing me the needle-sided portions of the security ink tags. She throws them at me, and I attempt to punch them back at her. Some of the needles are making contact and tearing up my knuckles. My preoccupation with the baby/toddler coupled with the inefficiency of punching these things results in me feeling like I am not making for a very fun time for Allison. I think she may sense this too.
      Tags: baby, game
      Categories
      Uncategorized
    7. 7 Feb: School reunion, Ben Affleck and Joseph-Gordon-Levitt in a court full of vampires

      by , 02-07-2019 at 09:51 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      Primary school reunion, I am looking hot in a tight dress and high heels, but can't recognize anyone and no one recognizes me. My mom shows up and joins me. It's in a cool bar with half the menu vegan. We sit down to chose a snack, my mom wants some potatoes they serve with different dressings, but I am more into sweets. It is so hard to choose so I just eat the sprouts they serve as salad. A girl that looks familiar sits with us and we start talking about the traffic in town, how it is always blocked for some construction.
      Then I have to walk Hachi and she comes with me as I walk through town.
      It turns day and I pass by the court. Inside I see Ben Affleck as a lawyer working there and decide to check it out. My dog is now a baby in a stroller, so I go inside with him. The baby is Joseph Gordon-Levitt (!). I see Ben Affleck talking to a client, then welcoming another client who comments he is using the same shirt from last week. He says it is just similar. I don't have a reason to be there so I just go look around discreetly. Meanwhile I no longer have the baby.
      I go to the toilet and bump with a lady that acts strangely. Actually, I notice something very wrong about a few people that I saw in the hallway. And then the lady tries to attack me. They have been bit by vampires and are turning. Luckily I am a vampire slayer and I have some special daggers to kill them. Some are easy to kill with one blow, but others seem to resist magically and are only wounded, even when I stab them in the heart and the head. Don't know why they are so powerful and when I get surrounded by three of them I feel scared. Suddenly rays of light shine through the building and the vampires disappear.
    8. 13 Jan: Orphan in India, satellites and tsunami, highschool reunion

      by , 01-13-2019 at 09:23 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

      In India, among orphans adopted by some guy that provided them food and shelter at some ruins. There are some western kids among them, I am one of them. We are treated differently, like we eat the cheapest food, no meat when there is some, like we belong to a lower caste. But things are changing, some day someone decides to share a can of tuna with us and some kids are angry about it.

      Learning about satellites and going through an interactive apprenticeship on how to pair them in orbit so they send signals to each other around the globe. We're at some kind of lighthouse by the sea. We come outside to look at the stars and we see satellites lasers aligning - I think it's augmented reality through a glass screen placed in front of us. Almost looks like we're watching an aurora. Then there is some talk about how the earth reacts to our invasion and something falls out of the sky into the ocean. It's dark, but I think I spot a wave and I scream "tsunami alert" and indeed a tsunami approaches. Me and a guy and his dog are the closest to the ocean and have no time to run away so we go inside hoping to get upstairs, but it is too late, we are swiped by the incoming water and projected through the back window against some roofs on a lower building behind this one. We hang on that rooftop until the water subsides. In the morning some military guy comes by and asks if we're ok and then treats me with familiarity. I take time some time to recognize him, it's Fermi. I am covered in some gook and he jokes about it, while also making some sexy stares at me. He helps me get down, I slide to his arms and I also feel some chemistry there.

      At a version of my high school with Zilla and others unknown. Kind of a reunion. We talk at times with different people, pose challenges, discuss topics. One girl who is now a famous actress sings something in a context and she sings beautifully. A person by her side makes comments, asks if any of us can sing too. I say not so well but I do. Someone suggests we make a song to perform later. Something experimental. I suggest something I was once suggested to explore, what would sound like the sound of silence. I make some suggestions, but people get lost. The singing girl goes compose something alone, had some inspiration, but comes back with a punk rock song completely nothing to do with the challenge. But she is very proud of her fist written song. Then I am going through my purse and cleaning it because it got dirty with something and I find a bunch of notes at the bottom, a few hundreds euros I had put aside and forgot I had. That cheers me up. Then I meet Vera and she bullies me a little as if we were still kids, drags me down to the common room where kids play snooker and such. I try to get rid of her. I see a baby girl walking apparently alone and she is after a ball rolling but also has a big apple on her hands and is crying cause she cant reach the ball. I pick it up and put it in her hands and get the apple and see if she's happier. She is but mostly suspicious of me and doesn't want to play with me. Meanwhile her mom comes by and I explain the situation and give her the apple. Then realize I am hungry, some of us go to lunch at the canteen. I sit in front of some guy. Only food is meat with fried egg and spinach and mashed potato. I don't know what to do but I end up eating. The guy starts criticizing the food as if we are at some restaurant and I just cant stand but stay quiet. Then he complains the meat whatever and I tell him "you know, I am actually a vegetarian, mostly vegan, but I am eating this because I was taught to respect whatever food is offered to you without judging. When I have the choice I don't eat this, but I am a guest. Also, there is nothing wrong with the food, it is tasty and billions of people would love to have such meal." The guy is embarrassed and eventually leaves after eating it all. Then some girls to my side who heard the conversation want to know why I am vegan. One asks something about health and I say its not for health. Another one asks how this damaged my social relations and family and I tell her not at all and others have changed too through my example. Someone says vegans are pushy, I say I am not. Then one has a theory about how my decision is actually misplaced, that something wrong in my life and romantic life was missing something, that I do this to fight some angst against patriarchy or some shit like that and I am about to explode like "WTF are u talking about? I did it out of awareness of the animal suffering, what does that have to do with that shit???" And she starts talking lots of BS and I lose her and I wake up.
    9. Saturday, November 10

      by , 12-31-2018 at 07:48 PM
      Melissa and I are having a child. We are somewhere, and this baby is being born not from her but from me. I feel something inside and know it is ready to come out. I let Melissa, who is standing by me, know this. I then give a small push and watch the child appear. It is small and wet, very clearly newborn. The next time I see him, he seems to be at least three years old. He looks very similar to a three year old me. I think that he looks like a combination of the two of us, though without very much Melissa. I see most of her addition in the color of his hair.
      Tags: baby, birth
      Categories
      Uncategorized
    10. How to drive?

      by , 08-27-2018 at 01:48 PM
      How to drive?

      Needed to learn how to drive a car with a baby seat in it. So first I practiced with a bike but I needed that seat so I went to a doll store but couldnít find one. Contuined walking around in that building and found an art gallery. Both my sisters were sitting there in a dark room with their iphones. I damaged a carpet before I started to rip off a piece of the wall. Underneath there was pictures of EXO. I even went to the blinds and so I could look outside the window. But even there on the window glass there were even more pictures. But when I saw a person outdoors I would let the blind slide down again.

      Categories
      non-lucid
    11. Ice Cream collector?

      by , 08-20-2018 at 06:13 PM
      Ice Cream collector?

      I ran around doing my job, which was fixing birthday parties and it was a lot! But at the same time I needed to collect as many kinds of ice cream as possible to make the best parties. When I wasn’t running around preparing, I went to see my baby I had. A friend asked me if it wasn’t a lot of work with a baby and I said: “Nooo, not at all.” And just tucked in a bottle in the baby’s mouth. I also took the baby to my mother and told her to babysit my child, which she gladly did. I felt so stressed during the dream like I wouldn’t have the time to do all the things that I really needed to do. Later I found my phone laying in the baby’s carriage and had a look at it. Instead of showing the picture of the locked screen it showed me so many pictures it possible could in a few seconds. The time was also going faster as the pictures changed. All of the pictures were of a guy. A thought I had was that the time suddenly stopped at the time my alarm should go off. And so I realised it was a dream.



      Note: My alarm went off so I woke up tho… not sure if the dream was finished or not?

      Updated 08-20-2018 at 06:30 PM by 95361

      Categories
      non-lucid
    12. Who's the father? A trip to Italy?

      by , 08-19-2018 at 08:15 PM
      Who's the father?

      I tried to collect as many different flowers as possible. It was some sort of a competition and many people were there to brag about how big and beautiful their bouquets were. I did have the biggest tho even if I held a baby in my arms I could still be the very best. It was justÖ I couldnít figure out who was the father of my child. I was supposed to get a flower from the guy and I had two options. Darren Criss or Byun Baekhyun.
      I went home to Darrenís place and entered the building. But he wasnít there and it was really dark since the lights were not on. I couldnít find any flower in there either which kind of made me disappointed. Before walking to Baekhyunís home I was passing by a bar. I went in there and had a look. Darren was sitting at a table drinking beer. A few tables away I saw a vase with a beautiful white flower with a note saying: ďFor my one true love.Ē
      I took it with me, smiled at Darren that hadnít noticed me and walked home. The other girls that were competing were really jealous of my lovely flower that I had received. Later Darren came by and was really surprised by the flower. He didnít know anything about it. He said that he wanted to bring a flower but he seemed to forgot about it. I glanced down on my baby and realized it looked like a watch. Like the time was running out.

      There was another dream but I only remember taking the flight home from Italy to get my creditcard and then fly back again. Just so I could return to Sweden the day after with my luggage. The trip was really stressful and very unnecessary.
      Categories
      non-lucid
    13. 5 dreams, 5 adventures

      by , 08-08-2018 at 03:28 PM


      A fox followed me around on a playground. It kind of scared me since it seemed to be magical. Kitsune.

      Had an animation project that I needed to do. I was really proud of my work and had even made a doll. Suddenly after been working so hard I found another doll on a table. It looked sad. I picked it up and looked around. The owner soon came out from the toilet and spoke to everyone in norweigen. I was the only one who did understand since I was the only one who could speak both english and swedish. So I translated it and she was sent home.

      There was a classreunion with my very old class. It was interesting to meet all the old students and to see what they have been up to.


      There was a king that wanted to have a child but all his wives died within a year so he was constantly getting married. Soon there wasnít many options left and his latest wife asked me if I wanted to marry him. I told her that I would think about it. But first I needed to find out who tried to poison all the poor queens and why!

      I was being chased by a large hunter. He also had some weird creature as a hunting pet. They called me bunny and was desperatly trying to shoot me! They didnít succeed! I hit the hunter in the head so many times he just fell to the floor and didnít wake up. The weird hunting pet turned into a baby.

      Updated 08-08-2018 at 05:50 PM by 95361 (Fixed spelling errors)

      Categories
      non-lucid , nightmare , memorable
    14. Hilarious Conveyor Belt Lucidity Fail

      by , 08-04-2018 at 02:04 PM
      Morning of August 4, 2018. Saturday.

      Dream #: 18,856-02. Reading tim: 1 min 40 sec.



      I am watching television with Zsuzsanna. It may be our present address on W Street, though the focus is mainly only on the imagery on the television screen, which at times seems very close and three-dimensional, though not as if I am at the locations as in other dreams.

      It is a reality show about conveyor belts in different locations. The whole show mostly features items and people moving on conveyor belts.

      A baby is lying on a moving conveyor belt at one point. They are moving from right to left in all the scenes.

      At one point, the sawed-in-half woman from ďBeetlejuiceĒ (from 1988) is on the conveyor belt, except that it is Winona Ryder in the role. Her upper half is smoking a cigarette. Although the scene is strange, my dream self perceives it as ďreal.Ē

      As threads of my conscious self identity become more viable in the waking process, I see two doll-sized men sitting on the conveyor belt. That seems wrong to me, as I know that all the previous scenes were ďreal.Ē I am considering telling Zsuzsanna that this is a fake event. I can see two unfamiliar normal-sized people in the background, with the miniature men in the foreground.

      As I think of talking about the fake part of the show, which seems to be the last segment of the episode, one of the tiny men relates that it is a test, implying effects and camera operation. (I had first thought it was an attempt to fool the audience.)



      My dream self perceived the living sawed-in-half woman as real, without question (even though the movie reference itself is erroneous as Winona Ryder was in a different role), yet when the small men appeared after this, I knew it was special effects. That is often how the reactive representation of the waking process works, as I move closer to full consciousness and viable thinking skills. The same transition exists in thousands of previous dreams. It has nothing to do with ďinterpretationĒ (an idea shared by people who do not understand what the dream state is) but is a factor of the waking process itself, which anyone of reasonable intelligence would understand. It is similar to associations with liminal space where the waking process renders itself as features such as a jigsaw puzzle, detective, or an attempt to read something for cognitive arousal. It is in contrast to when RAS modulation uses conflict or unrealistic events to create the distinction and emotional reaction that triggers waking.


      Updated 09-24-2019 at 07:49 AM by 1390

      Categories
      non-lucid
    15. 2-8 to 2-9-2018 dreams (2 interesting LDs)

      by , 02-09-2018 at 03:36 PM
      I decided that it was a bit much for me to go back and highlight everything in color that was lucid. So it is all non lucid until otherwise noted. And then if you wanted to read the lucid parts just do a search and skip ahead to those.


      I know I should probably be interested enough in my own dreams to go back through them but some nights like last night, where I had some amazing dreams, I just am so frustrated with having forgotten so much that I don't even want to think about my dreams.


      I was able to fall asleep probably around 9. I felt tired around 6:30 or 7 but couldnít sleep. I napped two hours during the day but I was still tired. I just couldnít sleep for some weird reason. Reading some of my older dream journal entries seemed to be helpful.



      Round 1 of Dreams

      Something about driving to my sister, on a road near a local hospital. There was more that happened before this but this was all I got. I had been telling her something that may have been too much for her to know. We were coming from some kind of meeting or class setting. Maybe she had gotten some kind of special coffee. It was like we were driving, and I needed to go fast with certain intense kind of metal music on, I am not exactly sure why. Something about a way I coped. But that wasnít good for her. There was something to do with time? Maybe some kind of meeting. There was some kind of design she drew in the sand or dirt on the ground, with a stick. I drew a similar design but at different angles.
      At another point, it was like she was pulling some stones out of the ground. They left triangle shaped marks in the ground where they had been pulled from. This seemed not okay to do at first but it was fine.
      Dad was saying how she should eat something like eleven to twelve fresh strawberries every day, referring to a nearby wild garden. I got the sense that he was sacrificing his strawberries for her to be able to have more. It might have also meant for me to eat strawberries or for her to feed the bird strawberries. Dad wouldnít get any strawberries. I was wondering how he would do that when he should really ďput on his own oxygen mask firstĒ.
      Then my sister was holding up a small stick from a tree that had some sap dripping from it. We were both saying and thinking how she should be careful not to get pregnant from all that tree sap.
      We had a bird. I think it was a yellow bird. It seemed to like walking on a tread mill, and if we let it walk on a tread mill, it would just completely lose track of time for days. There was a woman showing one of those new fangled hamster wheels that have the disc they can run on, its like a diagonal disc instead of a wheel thing. The woman was spinning it in her hand and saying how we canít give treadmills to birds any more. Then she showed us to a part of the wall that disappeared and had a hallway behind it.
      The idea was to make the bird use its mind and meditate, not just become a ďmindless cardio bunnyĒ.
      I would have remembered these dreams much better, but I woke up on my left side, with a nerve being pinched. Before I even knew I had woken up, I must have felt the nerve pinch and rotated onto my front. Then, I was on my front, and my neck was twisted badly, so I thought I should really go to my back. So I had to do all this moving before I could think of the dreams. Iím sure if I had been able to stay still, or move less, I would have got what it was I was telling my sister. I was frustrated because there was a lot lost.



      Round 2 of Dreams.


      It took me a while to fall back asleep. My shoulders were having a pinched nerve on both sides so I couldn't sleep on my side. Between that and the frustration of forgetting the previous dream, and other factors, I had trouble sleeping. I eventually found that I could slide a pillow underneath my side to take pressure off my shoulder and fell asleep on my right side.

      First, in this dream, I was in some kind of a class setting. I think there was some negative feeling, maybe conflict or fear. I have a vague sense of it but nothing I can put into words. This frustrates me very much because I don't remember how I got to the lucid part.

      Once I became lucid, I was in this office type of thing. Then I was in this hospital type of room and there was a kid on the bed. He had brown hair in a bowl type of haircut like I had growing up. Not sure exactly the age but young. He had his front two teeth and his lateral incizors, but the teeth outside those were missing. I noticed this discrepancy (I am missing my front lateral incizors) but I figured this was a version of myself as a child. It took me a moment. What it felt like was that I was dreaming from the viewpoint of that child for a while, and the next thing I knew, I was my adult self looking at the child. I said hello or something like that and we talked. Again, I can only remember this vaguely, which really frustrates me. It is so devastating to lose dreams like this.

      There was this tablet with a blue light filter on it that kept falling. It was his tablet. I was able to telekinetically keep picking it up for him before it fell. I think as the dream went on, he became younger, closer to a baby. I think he fell at one point, but I used telekinesis to get him into my arms.

      There was a little torch lighter, with the bendable hose part, that he was playing with. This didn't seem safe.

      At one point, we were towards the end of the room and there was some kind of female nurse there. I thought of trying to talk to her but realized I was with the child now.

      I had the child in my right arm, and noticed the fingers of my left hand were really crazy. I had a thumb, two fingers, then two missing stubs of fingers, then three more fingers. I showed the child, look, my hand has a lot of fingers. I already knew it was a dream.

      The torch lighter kept falling and I wanted to put it away. I had the thought that I might be in my subconscious, so maybe I should put the torch lighter in a safe cabinet, where the child can't get it and burn up the place when I am not there. There were all these silver cabinets and I found one to put it in. This whole part of the room seemed to be stainless steel. I found a cabinet on the right hand side that I wanted to put it in, but couldn't get the latch to open for me to put it in there. I guess I let that go after that.

      Then, I had the baby child in my left arm. I wish I had thought to talk more to the baby child. Instead, I was sort of acting as if I were in my own dream by myself, with no one there, just that I was holding this object for some reason. So I kind of missed out on that chance, but maybe I wasn't ready.

      I was near these sinks. To my right I opened a door to a stainless steel bathroom with a toilet hole in the floor. It was pretty dirty all over the place in here. There were two pretty grimy sponges near the sink, and all this grimy, gooey water. With the child in my arm, I decided that instead of flying away, I should clean the bathroom. Since I was thinking this was my inner mind, I figured cleaning the bathroom would be symbolic in some way. And a smart thing to do. I couldn't think of anything else to do, so I grabbed the less grimy sponge, and started to scrub the stainless steel of the bathroom. I guess I thought I was going to clean the whole thing.

      Next, I noticed there was no ceiling in this place. Just walls that went up. So I flew up above the walls a little. When I looked down, I saw this big office space with people in cubicles. I knew I had seen this earlier in the dream. I was amazed at how my dream location was so solid, that a location from before was in the exact same place, looking just as it did the last time. I was a few floors up from them somehow.

      I got the idea to fly down and fly around the office space. Then I kind of got the idea that I shouldn't do that, for whatever reason. It might get me in trouble or something. Well, I sort of ignored that instinct, and jumped down. Then, I woke up.

      I definitely hope that next time I have the chance, I remember to just stop trying to be so busy doing things, and actually talk to the child. There was so much more I forgot that happened with the child. He was crying for something at some point and I got it for him with telekinesis.

      It is so frustrating that I forgot so much of this dream. I stayed perfectly still upon awakening and thought through it. But, nothing else. No clue how I became lucid. No memory of at least half the stuff that happened when I was with the child. Sometimes dream recall can be torture for me because I find out how much I forgot.

      I had a very short dream flash after I started to think through that lucid dream where it was a dark sky. There were two light-up letters, maybe H, U, or, H, A, or A, H, I am not sure any more. I could see it clearly when I was in the dream flash but I had forgotten moments later. The letters faded into a black cloud on the bottom of the dream "screen". Then there was a white light in the middle. I knew it was a dream flash all along, so it was kind of like the beginning of a wake initiated lucid dream, but I couldn't figure out how to extend it into a new dream.

      After that I was awake, thinking through the dream. I had some sleep paralysis begin to set in and hoped another dream would begin, but it wasn't coming. I got up to write this one and now I will go back to sleep.





      Round 3 of dreams. .

      I remember there was some part with someone talking about something to do with safety? Not quite sure.

      One part where I was in my high school. Maybe flying, but not lucid. Starting to think I might be dreaming.

      There was another part when I was in the water. I forgot a lot of this, too. I remembered it at first but must have been tired.

      This last part was very interesting. There was a woman who had sort of kidnapped me in the back seat of her car. She had a gun pointed towards me. Actually, she even shot me at one point, and I died. It didn't hurt, but I had the feeling that I died. i think I experienced something, but I am not sure. That was actually really cool.

      Then, I was in that dream again, and she was driving me still. I was trying to play dead so that she wouldn't think she had to shoot me again, but I couldn't stay still. She started to aim the gun at me, and I realized I was dreaming. I had one of these moments where I said, you can't shoot me again, this is my dream. Then, I remembered the last time I did that in a dream, and the other dreamer didn't like that. So I said, well, it is both of our dreams. But I just don't want you to shoot me. And I both grabbed the gun with my dream hand and used some mental will to get the gun in my possession.

      Then, instead of wanting revenge on her for putting me through this, I realized she must be in trouble if she had to hold me hostage. So, I decided, knowing it was a dream, to help her. I asked her more about why she had kid napped me, but I don't remember that much. She said she had some other salts in the car. I asked if they were for punishing me, and she said, yes. I didn't really get mad at her, though.

      So I was sort of helping her find her way. We were 3 hours away from home. It was a silver or light gray mini van.

      At one point, I thought she might have had the gun again. I had to double check that it was in my right hand pocket of my north face jacket. She had some stuff laid out on the floor. I think we had got to some sort of hotel.

      Then there was a thing about how even if she didn't kill or torture me, other people would still come after me. So, we had to make it look like she had succeeded somehow. Then, all of these ransom note type things appeared on the screen. Maybe I had lost lucidity at some point, but becoming lucid and getting the gun from her might have been all I needed to consciously do.

      She seemed to have dark hair. I think she was Italian. I think I almost asked her if she was Italian but didn't want to seem to be stereotyping her?

      There was a lot more stuff in these dreams but I guess I slept on it more as I was laying there trying to remember it. I had difficulty sleeping tonight, so I can accept that I was just too groggy. But still, it hurts to forget, because the parts were definitely cool.

      Oh, right, here is one part. Painfully vague, but I've got it. There was something about squatting over a squat toilet. My friend from High School Rich M was saying something. He was saying how it was hard to squat there for a while, so I said to eat some chicken while he does it. Then, he said that it would cause him to poop more from eating the chicken. But I thought, the chicken won't digest immediately and make new poop that has to go out until later.

      I think there was a part with a girl I liked from high school. All of this is now painfully vague and I am somewhat upset about the memory loss.

      I should have got myself up, but I didn't because I was still remembering details from the dream in my mind. I thought I should stay still to try to remember more of it, but then I guess as I was doing that, i fell asleep some number of times. That just means I was tired, and reasonably so. A lot of times, when I am not too tired, I think through the dream until i know I am done, then get right up to write it, without any risk of falling back to sleep.

      There might have been something with my sister and a bird, unless that was an earlier dream. It could have been both this dream and an earlier dream.

      Well, I will go back to bed now. i will try to see if I can recall any other parts.

      When I was at the high school there may have been something about the A V club.









      Round 4 of dreams.

      These were cool but again I am very dissappointed with my dream recall.

      So, there was something with my sister. We were in this room that had all white and dark brown stuff. It was like a bathroom or a mix of different rooms including a bathroom. There was something also mixed in about these people chanting some incantations around a ring to summon a fairy. The ring said Zelda on it. They were going to summon a fairy called Zelda, but I was thinking Zelda is a princess in the video game, but I didn't think she was a fairy. Anyway, it didn't have to be video game zelda. So then I saw two people, I think my sister on the right hand side, and myself on the left hand side, sitting on toilets in this white and brown room. I got the sense that my sister would be sucked through the toilet when the people summoned the fairy, but I was going to go with her. I was also eating something in the room. I had my multivitamins and chicklets. I was going to offer my sister some gum. I was afraid that it was too dirty of a room to eat in, because of there being a bathroom right near it.

      In an earlier dream, there was a guy saying how something most people think is non violent might not actually be non violent. I forgot what it was but it seemed so insightful. It was something I never would have thought of.

      Yeah, quite dissappointed with my dream recall tonight. I am pretty much always dissappointed with my dream recall right after the dream, because I am still aware of how much I forgot. Once I forget how much I forgot, and I am just left with the dream journal entries themselves, I don't have such bad feelings about it. Also, I think nights with better dream recall mean I am getting less deep sleep, so there will be a balancing effect where I get deeper sleep the other nights at the expense of dream recall.

      I woke up from these dreams laying there for a few solid minutes (it felt like) before any dream details came to mind. I remember I was eating something, but it was so much food that I would have to put on an m p 3 to distract me from how much I had to eat. Also, I felt like I was laying there thinking of the dreams at times, but when I woke up physically, I couldn't remember a thing. Maybe I dreamed that I was thinking of it. I don't know.

      Hopefully I can sleep one more time and have a dream I can actually remember well enough to be happy. But I will probably never be happy!



      Round 5 of dreams. .

      I slept again, and I know I had some dreams. My dreams over this last night were a lot harder to remember than usual, for whatever reason. I regret this but I guess it just means my body and mind needed some deeper and more restorative sleep. I kind of overdid it on some things lately and too much exhaustion seems to not be good for dream recall.

      The one part of the dream I remembered was I was hearing this song. Maybe there was something on a table. I remembered the words to the song at first, but then forgot them. There was this rubber ball swinging around on a string. Then I heard a loud "thud!" either from waking life or from the dream, like an auditory hallucination. The "thud!" woke me up in a startle and my memory of dreams was completely wiped out. It might have been a thud from outside. I tried to stay still and think about the dreams, but couldn't get any.





      Other Notes
      Here is some other writing about my dream recall frustrations I did:

      There may have also been some kind of creepy monsters in the earlier parts but that might have been something i was thinking about before I fell asleep. I was thinking about being nice to snakes I see when I am in the woods and how it would be cool to be able to befriend snakes even when most people would say it is dangerous, just by being very loving towards them on a deep level.


      Forgetting so much of a dream like this really kills me. I am totally exasperated over this, because I feel I am doing everything I possibly can to maximize my dream recall. I don't know if anyone else has this level of pain over forgetting parts of their dreams, but I do. I just want to remember what happened in my dream, but all i get is like 25 to 50 percent. And I am stuck with that, no matter how much I try to visualize it or focus on it. The memories just seem to be gone.

      Also I don't think I had any false awakenings.
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