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    1. The Usual Snake and Porch Autosymbolism

      by , 07-19-2018 at 01:19 PM
      Morning of July 19, 2018. Thursday.



      In my dream, there is the usual snake scenario, though there are different factors as is typically the case. Our two youngest sons are present in the unfamiliar room. The setting is meant to be the house we are now living, but it is not familiar.

      There is a small snake that does not seem much of a threat. It slithers off into an area of miscellaneous items; mostly toys.

      We see a big green snake. As it slithers out, I swing at it with a sword, though I miss the first time. I chop off its head in my next attempt.

      The nature of my dream changes. Some unknown people are present, but I do not see them as intruders. The setting now seems to be a discernible variation of the Loomis Street house. They are going somewhere. An unknown female is leaving her daughter behind in the back of her car. That seems a bit unusual to me, but I think I will check up on her later.

      Later, the setting changes into what seems to be a variation of the Barolin Street house. I hear a noise on the porch, and I go to check. I consider it might be one of our children, though it now seems late at night. After I open the front door, I see an unknown boy on the porch in the semidarkness. He seems to be an East Indian of about fourteen years old. He is standing in the center of the porch, which is larger than it was in real life.

      “What do you want?” I ask him. He does not move, and I become slightly annoyed. Perhaps he is a neighbor’s son wanting to sell me something, though I remain unsure. I consider that he might be intruding deliberately. I do not know his motive.

      “Suzi, could you get my gun?” I call out to my left. The boy looks concerned and turns to leave.

      "I was just kidding,” I say as he is exiting the porch.

      After this, there is awareness of the world soon coming to an end. I sit on a couch across from Zsuzsanna, and she seems concerned. It is now morning in an unfamiliar lounge room. (It is still implied to be our home.) My dream self does not register the sudden change in time as is almost always the case.

      The world is going to end today. I am not sure how I know. I feel wary of this idea. I think back and understand it somehow relates to an encounter I had with someone. I am in an anomalous state that I cannot resolve consciously. I know it is from a previous dream encounter, presumed to be from before the snake event. Although I know I am dreaming I do not know I am dreaming.

      I soon wake with the full realization that I had been dreaming, feeling relieved. Still, I cannot resolve the enigma of knowing I was dreaming, yet not knowing. It was as if my dream self knew I was dreaming without my conscious identity knowing. Although this has happened on other levels repeatedly since childhood (especially in non-lucid dream control), it has never been expressed in this specific way before.



      The porch showdown with the preconscious avatar (a common form of RAS mediation since early childhood) had different dynamics than usual. The mood was different and seemed more like an interconsciousness avatar. It was even more like an external entity, though this might have been illusory.

      The “end of the world” scenario has occurred regularly since childhood. I rarely have anxiety in dreams, but in this one I did. I think it might have been heavily influenced by “Dream Replicants and the Emergence of Simulacra” by Richard Catlett Wilkerson, as I had also been writing a series of pages about emerging consciousness simulacra. For example, one part in Richard’s text read, “More currently, Carl Jung, and then James Hillman have suggested that even the ego in the dream, who I think of as me in the dream, may also not be me. Linda Magallón has also suggested we give the dream a higher existential reality and address the dream and dreamer and dreaming process as a kind of entity.” Ultimately, it represents my subliminal knowledge of my dream ending.

      The snake scenario, in this case, is typical RAS modulation (which is very common in most people, yet somehow no one ever catches on even with some websites featuring a few dreams a day with the same content). Here, it only served to shift my level of consciousness rather than wake me. Cutting off the snake’s head was autosymbolism for subliminally separating from my conscious self’s identity for a time, as in other dreams. (Snakes otherwise signify different aspects in other dream types when not a segment of the RAS factor, often human intestine, umbilical cord, or electrical cord warnings.) Green shows up more in a particular band of awareness, midway through the dreaming process (also signifying peace and balance depending on the hue), followed by yellow (unification stage of the dream self and conscious self), orange, and red. Red, however, usually only dominates when I have slept too long in the last dream of a sleep cycle.


      Updated 11-17-2019 at 07:14 PM by 1390

      Categories
      non-lucid
    2. Marsh and Missile [dual narrative]

      by , 08-09-2017 at 01:28 PM
      Morning of August 9, 2017. Wednesday.



      I become aware that I am babysitting an unfamiliar boy of about four years of age in the northeast area of the Cubitis living room. I perceive myself as being about twenty-five years old. It feels like it might be late morning. I have no associations with whomever the boy’s parents might be.

      The dreamer does not realize that he has not lived in Cubitis since 1978, leaving when he was seventeen. He also does not recall that he lived in Wisconsin when he was twenty-five, not Florida. The memory of his three sons (and two daughters) does not seem extant, though the presence of the unfamiliar boy, who does not resemble any of his sons, may be a subliminal clue, though he otherwise has no memory of who he presently really is.

      There is a huge Raggedy Ann doll sitting against the north wall near the northeast corner of the living room. I have a notion that the giant stuffed doll is somehow a mother figure for the boy. It almost reaches the ceiling. The head is unrealistically large in proportion to the rest of the doll. Time passes, and the head seems flatter (front to back) than it should be. The doll begins to sag and lean forward and the boy and I are annoyed that this oversized pie-like head may cover us. I have to push it back a few times, but when I do, the whole doll, especially the head, seems slightly thinner.

      The dreamer still does not have viable memory. He does not question why a giant doll would be perceived as a “real” mother by the boy or comfort him as such. He does not even consider simply moving out of the way of the doll when it leans forward at times. He does not consider why the doll’s head gets vertically flatter when there is no discernible reason for the change. Perhaps he is subliminally aware of the weight of the blanket on his real physical body as he sleeps, and perhaps through the veil of sleep, he indirectly recalls that his youngest daughter has stuffed toys near her as she sleeps. Could this hodgepodge of current neural energy while sleeping be why such a scene is rendered? He also did have concern that his youngest son had enough blankets prior to sleeping. As a doll symbolizes the physical inactivity of someone while in the dream state, it likely is a very distorted thread of memory of his beautiful wife Zsuzsanna, combined with thoughts of his pillow that sometimes seems too flat.

      Eventually, I notice that much of the oversized ragdoll is now more like a collection of blankets that fall forward at times, a couple that cover me, though I think the doll is still sitting there. It seems ambiguous, and the round face itself seems more and more like a large flat pillow I push back several times. It does not seem cold. I do not think that the boy will be harmed, only perhaps annoyed by being covered like this. After a few minutes, I am aware that Dennis (half-brother on my mother’s side) is coming into the house. He seems about thirty years old and is dressed like a biker. He wants to show me something. It seems the boy will be okay on his own, though I somehow perceive that Dennis has no interest in the boy’s well-being. I go with him for a short distance after leaving the house. I then decide to fly. Coming out from the house, it is now the King Street boarding house. I effortlessness fly north over Tenth Street South, leaving Dennis behind for now.

      The dreamer’s brother had not been to Florida since 1970. Like every other dream feature, it is erroneous, completely removed from any correct timeline. Even more curiously, he walked out from the north end of the open carport in Florida yet simultaneously from the closed porch of the King Street boarding house, not regarded in real life much since 1990 and over 1,500 miles away from the original setting. There is no measure of distance in thought, but that is moot, as the two buildings were somehow perceived as being the same. The dreamer often flies in his dreams as if it was a perfectly natural thing to do. To take to the air to get somewhere else is what he has done often for many years in both lucid and non-lucid dreams, without considering physics or gravity. There is no doubt, but the dream self is not the conscious self, and the rules that dictate that flying cannot be as such do not apply, even if there was some subliminal memory that it was not possible.

      I end up in some sort of forest on the other side of La Crosse, which I perceive may be several blocks west of Loomis Street. After walking around and entering a denser area of forest by way of a footpath, I notice that Dennis is already here. He talks to a seemingly homeless person in dark apparel. The unfamiliar scruffy male is sitting at the side of the path, facing outwards from the dense trees. Dennis seems annoyed and may be impatient about something. It has something to do with the other male not owning a motorcycle as he is expected to. There is no fighting, just a conversation. It seems the other male may have sold or lost his motorcycle and is now living in the woods. I walk around and see another clear footpath that leads straight through the densest part of the forest. It seems to be afternoon and the imagery is very clear and beautiful. The path leads east and seems to continue for quite a distance. I can see an open area at the very end that indicates an urban area. Still, after walking around, I decide to fly again.

      The dreamer does not question this fictional area of land. The area in real life would be within the same area as the Northside Elementary School (though the area looks much different now than when he last lived there in February 1994). He does not ask himself how Dennis apparently walked there and got there before him.

      As I am flying, my focus changes somewhat. I see below me, something that is almost like a life-sized map, showing how the area originally appeared. It was mostly a marshy expanse with no trees for a long time. This changes, as Dennis had planted a number of saplings over time, until it was a dense forest. Curiously, I am aware that no one else, including members of the city council, ever noticed this change other than Dennis and a few biker friends of his. I watch the changes in the map as I turn and fly south.

      Looking down on a slowly animated life-sized map superimposed over the bird’s-eye view of the land below does not seem unusual to the dreamer. It is like a visual historical view displaying the changes over time, not following the rules of real-life perception. He does not fly back down to investigate or consider that if he did, he might be in the original treeless marsh as it supposedly was years previously.

      I am now aware that it is nighttime even though it had been afternoon moments before. I do not find the change unusual. I am aware of a missile lighting up a small area of the sky to the north, over what I perceive may be a small island, but I still consider it as a threat even though it seems far away. My wife Zsuzsanna now joins me as we run southward. The buildings around us start to shake. They seem to wobble and waver unrealistically, somewhat like exaggerated jelly motions. I think we can escape. We run over the tops of buildings, over the roofs of commercial buildings of various heights, no attention to how tall they are. It seems effortless but annoying. I get the idea to take cover in a boiler room of a commercial building. I sense the ceiling may collapse, but it does not, though there is still shaking. We end up near a breaker panel. I have a fading idea about possibly resetting the main breaker, as if that might somehow make the building more suitable to hide in.

      The dreamer’s memory seems more viable now as he recalls Zsuzsanna. There is even a thread of recent memory about North Korea’s missile launches, but little else. His focus on the breaker panel reveals a subliminal awareness of the neural energy within his mind, yet not fully realizing why this thought emerges in the last seconds of his dream or whether it symbolizes “deactivating” his dream, increasing his neural energy and expansion into whole consciousness, or both.


    3. June 22nd, 2016

      by , 06-22-2016 at 05:38 PM (Book of Dreams)
      Bedtime:
      2:00am
      Wakeup:
      10:30am

      Dream 1 (fragment):
      I was on a rooftop of a high rise building, and the roof was a pool. I was with my sister, and we had this giant floatation device in the shape of an octopus, it was huge and pink, and somehow it fell off the roof into the street and I could hear crashing and horns and screaming. Oops!

      Dream 2:
      I came home but my apartment was way bigger than normal, though I didn't question it in the dream. There were children running around, and I knew my roommate was supposed to be babysitting them, but she was talking to some tall mysterious men on a screened in porch. The kids were crying, and I had to give one of them a haircut, but she kept thrashing and running away, and then she said she hated the haircut cuz her hair looked curly. I tried to get her to sit down to let me finish, and I offered to blow-dry it so that it would be straight but she was just crying and freaking out. Eventually my roommate came out to take care of them and then the parents came and got them.
    4. 6/18/16

      by , 06-18-2016 at 08:20 PM (Book of Dreams)
      Bedtime:
      10:30pm-11pm
      WBTB:
      3am-4am (unsuccessful)
      Woke up:
      5:45am

      Dream 1
      This is just a dream fragment, but I remember either I was plugged into something, or something I had was plugged into something... Idk, but there were for chords and something was charging (it might have been me, I can't remember) and during the charging time, I was playing 3 songs on the piano (I can't remember what they were but I know 2 were in B major and 1 was in E major), and I know my sister and cousin were there. I think they fell asleep while I played.

      Dream 2
      I was on the front lawn of an old building, the lawn was surrounded by a metal framed fence, the kind you would find at a cemetery. I was digging something, and I saw a cardboard box nearby filled with little baggies of weed. I thought about taking some, but it wasn't mine and I wasn't sure where I was, so I didn't take any.

      *time lapse*

      I was inside the building, and my grandma was there watching 2 babies, they were both kids of my coworkers. 2 of my uncles were there as well. I now knew I was in a convent, and it's hard to remember the conversations that were going on, but I remember the nuns in the convent were dressed in regular civilian clothes. I also remember somebody telling me that they were all prostitutes and also heroin addicts. "They do heroin?" I said. "Yeah, they're doing it right now in front of us," somebody replied. and I remember looking over at one slumped over as she was shooting up. Not very nun-like, in my opinion.
    5. A Cat, 2 Dogs, Roommates & a Fire

      by , 06-16-2016 at 04:07 PM
      Dream 1: Non-Lucid dream fragment. Meesha was rubbing up against my feet while I was in bed & I woke up. She wasn't there in real life & she never does this, lol.

      Dream 2: Non-Lucid dream. I went to this apartment & was babysitting a small dog. The owner came home. We were talking & then we heard something coming from the back part of the apartment & these 3 people who were apparently hiding there & they found another dog there that had just been born in the back of the apartment. They were friends of the owner. Suddenly there was a fire in the back of the apartment. We put it out but it had opened up a wall & area that wasn't there before. The owner suddenly said, okay you guys can fix this part of the apartment & you can live there. It was funny.


      I listened to a soothing subliminal Lucid Dream tool while I was sleeping & I woke up in a good mood. It actually let me use the WBTB method.

      Non-Lucid-Green
      Lucid-Red
      Explanation of details-Blue
      Side Notes-Purple
      Astral Projection/AP-Brown
    6. Babysitting Troubles, Same-Sex Marriage Simulator and Coughing

      by , 02-01-2015 at 09:27 PM (The Kestrel's Dreams)
      February 01, 2015


      Woke up a few times in the night, tried to WBTB or WILD, always failed...


      (Fragment) Two At Once?!

      I was at some sort of convention or event, walking with some friends, though I can't remember which ones specifically were there. I was talking to them about how two different families had asked me to babysit for them on the same night. I couldn't do both, so I was worried about which one to chose and how to tell the other family I couldn't be there. I was going to go with the family that had asked me first, but I felt so bad about saying no to the other family. I thought about trying to be in two places at once, but my brain would get fuzzy every time I tried to think about that.




      Just The Same

      I was in an interactive exhibit about how same-sex couples and families are just the same as hetero-families. In the exhibit, it would put you as one of the parents, and your spouse would be a randomly generated same-sex hologram. The kid(s) would also be randomly generated, and for an hour, completely normal things would happen. I don't remember what my "spouse" looked like, but she was a really sweet woman. The kids would come up to me, calling me "Mom" and her "Momma," and would ask for candy or help with their homework, or something.

      At the end of the exhibit, chairs were arranged in an oval so that you and all the other people who had just gone through the simulation could sit and talk about equal marriage rights and reflect on your experiences in the exhibit.




      (Fragment) Coughing, All the Coughing...

      This was a fragment in which my coughing was powering a ride at a carneval. So I had to just keep coughing, no matter what. I vaguely remember trying to cough so hard/often that I built up a backup so I could take a break from coughing, but the backup always disappeared right away, so I had to keep coughing and had wasted my own energy coughing harder :(
    7. Why Babysit? (my dreams explained)

      by , 01-14-2014 at 07:14 AM
      Morning of January 14, 2014. Tuesday.



      My wife Zsuzsanna and I are back at the house in Wavell Heights in Brisbane where our two oldest also lived when growing up. The house is similar to the real one when we lived there, but with several minor differences. Most of my dream takes place in the kitchen. Zsuzsanna seems to be making a salad with carrots and lettuce.

      We are babysitting the girl of a single mother, although I am unsure if it is “our” house in my dream or if we are supposedly at her house (even though it was ours in reality years ago). After a time, it seems that there is concern about where the girl is that we are supposed to be babysitting and she is nowhere to be seen; nowhere in the house or yard. I think about what we should do, as it seems to be problematic to be babysitting a child who is not even present.

      Soon though, the dark-haired girl makes an appearance in the kitchen. When questioned, she says that she had been down by the riverbank with her boyfriend, having taken her bicycle to the location. This seems a bit disrespectful in taking off without saying where she is going. I tell her that if she had vanished, no one would know where to look. I ask her if her mother just lets her go off at random times without any clue as to where she is going and it seems the answer is yes.

      “Your mother is a nut job!” I add dramatically. She goes and sits in the corner in the kitchen, to the right of the doorway, to brood. I soon notice that she has numerous tiny white spots on her shirt, seemingly caused by the ever-amusing “healing powder” (over “healing power”) mix-up. Apparently, a packet of maize flour had been thrown at her. The “healing powder” vs. “healing power” blunder always amuses me when it occurs in my dreams (though this only happens when I use “healing power” in lucid auto-scripting and it carries over in a distorted form in non-lucid dreams such as this one).



      It is of no consequence, really. Whether it is “powder” or “power” the overall results are similar enough. It is always maize flour. Even so, there is probably also a “flour girl” and “flower girl” mix-up at some levels.

      “It may look like an antibiotic but inside it you have chalk, powder or if you are lucky, you get maize flour or whatever is inside there, decried Prof Rogo.” Sudan: Outdated legislation hindering health programs in Africa by Mena Report.

      “I love the flower girl”; a relevant Cowsills lyric. (Zsuzsanna was the flower girl as a child in hippie Nimbin during the Mardi Grass/Aquarius festival, one of hundreds of precise dream clues that led to my real-life discovery of her as my soulmate).



      Aside from the subliminal auto-scripting in this dream that yet again confused “power” with “powder”, the young girl being down by the river with her bicycle is an autosymbolic play on dream state induction itself (as well as a childhood reference to the Dickey Lee song “Patches”). The river signifies spiritual communication as well as dream state initiation, with a younger version of Zsuzsanna, and the bicycle as an element of the physical body, signifying vague awareness of the hypnopompic kick that only truncates some dreams in the first stage of the sleep cycle.


      Updated 04-15-2018 at 01:44 PM by 1390

      Categories
      non-lucid
    8. Vacation and Clothes

      by , 09-02-2013 at 06:18 PM
      September 2, 2013
      Technique: MILD & WBTB

      Dream 1:

      Dreamed I was talking with my best friend and then she turned into Jada Pinkett Smith. We were staying at a hotel on vacation and she was asking me about my children (age, school, etc.). We had such a great time by the pool reminiscing about how grown up were now.

      Dream 2:

      I was with my niece and we talking about cleaning out our closets. I recall that some of my clothing was in some type of storage so we went there to find the clothes. We found my extra clothes and started trying the clothes on (which is one of our favorite past times). I remember most of the clothing was from the GAP clothing store. I finally found something to wear but can’t remember what occasion I was dressing for.

      Fraggle:

      Baby sitting a child for someone and I didn’t like it

      Fraggle:
      I was so desperate to leave some place, but every time I would leave, I would keep coming back to the damn place.
    9. 8/9/13 - holding someones baby

      by , 08-09-2013 at 07:49 PM (Leaving the matrix)
      I'm walking through a neighborhood and houses that look like my childhood neighborhood. I walk around a corner and see this what looks like a party going on or something or maybe it's just their family visiting, I continue on the sidewalk that goes in front of their house and I man stops me and say his son is misbehaving and he wants to know if I can hold his son a little further down the street by the pole, so I look down the street and there is huge wooden pole covered in people adds and numbers and such, so I agree, his son looks to be about 3 or 4 years old and is ion a white onezie. He hands me the kid, and then he hands me this laminated goldenrod colored paper that has a list allover it, I don't bother to read it but the guy says to hold it while I hold his son, so I do, and I walk over to the pole and soon after get bored so begin to read the adds posted on the poll. Then finally the dad calls back his son from me, but I realize the wind has blown the paper behind me while I'm walking back to the father, so I turn around and run after it and the father thinks I'm running off with his child and almost starts to go after me but then he sees me pick up the paper and walk back to him and I hand the kid to him and he thanks me.
    10. Curse of the Shadows

      by , 05-13-2011 at 02:59 AM
      5/12/11 - Curse of the Shadows
      Dream Non-Dream Lucid

      I was at my house, but in a more woodsy setting, with tall trees all around and a single dirt road cutting through them. It was past nightfall, and I was with my cousin and two little girls that we were supposed to be babysitting. The dream became sort of like a horror movie; there was something that we could not see inside of the house with us, and it was going to kill us one by one until there was only one girl left, to whom it'd pass on a curse. Everything happened quickly. Before I knew it, everyone in the house had seemingly disappeared, leaving me alone with something unseen. I panicked, and ran outside. I saw a man standing across the road, and sprinted towards him. As I was doing so, I could see the sun beginning to rise in the distance, and the man smiling victoriously. Suddenly I realized what was happening, and tried desperately to run past him so that the sunlight might hit me first. Too late, rays of light passed over him as he turned and started walking away. The light was coming towards me now, and as it did I could feel it pushing me back, almost burning me. I ran back towards the house to find shade, and ended up huddled in an odd dent in the roof. Apparently, the man had been invisible and unable to go into direct sunlight for many years, and had finally freed himself of his curse by passing it on to me.
      When my parents arrived home, they freaked out because they could not find me. It seems we all forgot about the other missing people, myself included. I ended up yelling down to my mom until she came outside and I was able to explain what'd happened. She was angry, saying it was my fault and she should've expected it to happen, wondering what she was supposed to do with an invisible daughter. She also suggested me stepping into the light, which I refused immediately because I knew it would harm me. My mom then basically left me on the roof.
      I then found myself in a large, mansion-like house with my cousin(yes, the same one from earlier) and many of her friends. They thought my curse was "cool" and we basically just talked for awhile.
      Later on I was with Hannah in a car, her driving and me in the passenger seat. We were talking about the curse and how it was weird that she could see me while no one else could. I told her that if she wanted to know what it was like, I could pass the curse to her the next morning and we could trade off again a day later. She agreed, and as she was driving in silence the thought of leaving her with the curse occurred to me momentarily, but I knew I could never do something like that to a friend and dismissed the idea.
      When we reached her house, I scooted over to the driver's seat after Hannah got out of the car, and remembered that Hannah had no licence and I didn't even know how to drive.

      I recall nothing after this.
    11. Realization

      by , 01-16-2011 at 05:28 PM
      1/16/11 - Realization
      Dream Non-dream Lucid

      I had to babysit two of my cousins last night, and my aunt and uncle didn't come home until about midnight. My uncle drove me home even though it was late, but I've had to sleep over before because of how late they can be. Enter dream scenario.

      I was at my uncle's house, and he had just returned home. He told me it was 3 am, and that he'd have to take me home in the morning. I was a little confused. I remembered being in the car with him earlier, and wondered why he couldn't have taken me home then. Suddenly I realized that he already had taken me home, and that I was in my own bed, asleep. I basically spazzed out. I ran downstairs, and outside. It felt a little cold, because I'd been expecting it to be, but it really wasn't much different than the temperature inside. I knew for sure then that I was dreaming. I guess I was still a little shocked, because I woke up immediately.

      I wish I'd remembered a lucid task or something! Maybe tonight...?
    12. #13. Third Person Narration

      by , 06-14-2010 at 03:44 AM (Things to Run Away From Really Fast)
      Game. Tree. Spy. Babysitting.

      It feels like I might be playing a video game. There are two characters: the main character is following a mentor archtype through a forest filled with ruins and caves leading deep below the surface. I'm not sure if I'm the mentor or the MC; I might be both. We're searching for a series of gemstones or charms, consulting witches on the way. On some level, I know the MC won't go for the mentor's final goal. It's far too diabolical.

      There are something like four dimensional levels of this tree, and we're exploring them all. I recall at least two characters (though I'm sure there were more): the theoretical expert, and the practical one. Again, I think I'm both characters. Somehow, climbing the tree leads to different dimensional gateways, though I don't remember where they were all located. Dimensions below the surface still had branches and a fall that would probably kill you. I remember that TE is very well protected via anchors and harnesses and carabiners, presumably because the various dimensions can be so disorienting. I remember being the TE, and being left on one of the explored levels, then being the PE and actually exploring a deeper one. When we get to the final level, we find another gateway. We go back to the surface to recoup.

      Spying is involved. A guy of about my age may have information that our organization desperately needs. Me and another female friend get ourselves invited to... watch movies or something in a group. We're sitting in a basement on a bunch of couches. Then everything is flooding. I stay behind to grab all of my things that are scattered below the water (seems to be my swimming stuff and a coil-bound notebook containing instructions). An older man, maybe the other guy's dad, is back for me, scolding me for not evacuating and leaving my stuff behind - is it really worth my life? Considering how incriminating that notebook is, it very well could be.

      I think I'm found out later, anyway.

      "If we're babysitting tonight, why are we here in the morning?" Apparently the parents don't actually need us until 9PM. I resolve to put the brats to bed VERY early, and enjoy the party in the meantime.

      Third Person Narration. Scare Factor: 2. It's annoying for dream recall.