Recent DJ Posts

4th October 2021

Scraps:

(a long dream, but poor recall)

Some RTS segment and I recall beaches and water.

One part a bit Minecraft-like or some other game. T is here and someone else is with me? Some kind of tower, or otherwise large structure.

One of the last parts of the dream, I am my alter-ego and there are interactions with me as such. The other people are dream-generated. They seem to be pressuring me, or something? Despite my form, I feel slightly shorter than others.

Some other dream? H has convinced mom and dad to bring S over here. I think H goes to pick them up and I remember seeing them all at one point. I feel concerned about S because of all the usual reasons regarding costs and also because of the long trip.

Notes:

- The last part was certainly a reflection of how I sometimes don't feel listened to or validated on, regarding both matters of money and of companionship. In the segment, some beliefs I hold as very important are partly betrayed by my closest, besides the fact I feel it may be detrimental to both S's health and to my financial situation.

- That same segment probably also relates to how I have often been very easily upset by changes to what a situation is and changes to what it would be or would have been.

- More recently it has been more frequent for me to take on my alternate form in my non-lucid dreams. In this case, the context likely relates to my art and some perception that the expectations of others are above my own. My stature is clearly metaphorical in regards to my feelings in terms of recognition, but this dream element also relates directly to some of my choice themes and how I've often felt physically inadequate in some specific areas (primarily to my own expectations) when compared to others.
-- I do not recall what exactly the other people were pressuring me about, but in terms of my waking life contexts, art is the most directly relevant context here.

2/24/20

I am in a dinosaur park with friends and family. While walking through a field we see what appears to be a dinosaur trap laid out on the ground, with weighted wires going into the trees, there are toy mini dinosaurs and torn up sheets in the bed of a larger metal frame. We hear kittens meowing from inside but cannot see anything.

The park is very beautiful with large prehistoric trees and shrubbery all around. My cat is running around unleashed and I gather she has wandered too far. Suddenly a large trex with purple and orange colouring starts chasing us from across the field, it's roar echoing our innards. I call my cat loudly and she runs towards us just barely in front of the rex. She makes it to me while we are running and I scoop her up to run towards the treeline. I tell my family we need to get in the dense folliage to escape. We barely make it to safety as the rex tramples the trees behind us. We begin to walk down a path, we tell a worker about the rex we see, but they are also a dinosaur and smile with big teeth.

We are now in a period based town. Everyone wears decorated corsets and top hats. But there is still a dark like and partially gothic tone. I opt for a train ride and leave my family behind in the town to look around and shop. The train is mainly populated by witches and druids. They are all dressed period, but with pagan garb and accessories.

I befriend a girl who is quite short with almond eyes and brunette short hair. She is coy and playful while also being witty and fiercely forward. We get closer and she reminds me she has a boyfriend regularly, it doesn't phase me in the least as I can tell she doesn't care. He seems like some ringleader with small dreads and bright blue contact eyes who is never around her. I gather she is a vampire of sorts, pale skin, morose demeanour yet predatory in her desires. We venture around the train between the different ornate cars from time to time. Taking in the sights of the passing countryside, sharing meals, and playing games. We spend hours laying in bed remembering our lives and gently caressing each other, nothing sexual, just sensually emotive. She tells me she doesn't like what happens to her at night. Unphased at thinking she is a vampire I ask is it because her teeth get longer? I then tell her I always found the taste of blood to be unquenching. To let her know I am unbothered by her condition, and can relate to her. She hardly looks at me but I know she is sad for some reason. We form a strong bond on the trip, perhaps 2 days have elapsed and the journey is coming to a head.

She sits in a booth table along one of the carriages. There is suddenly a great drama stirring the passengers. The people of the car are now united against me. They threaten me with dark magic. I tell them to do their worst as I am unafraid. At once a dozen of them put out their hands and begin making noises with their mouths like they are casting spells. Nothing happens and I shout they are all made up. The train has stopped at a gift shop town with many rooms to purchase trinkets and accessories. I step out on the platform as the witches are still trying to curse me. I outstretch my hand and shout with strong forward intention "Now That Is Enough!" A bright light flashes engulfing the entire area.

As the senses return, it seems the dark gothic vibe of the people in the car has been lifted. Some people file out of the train with completely white eyes, they are pale and nude, almost stupified. The dozen or so who were dark are now stripped barren and pale. I ask someone on the platform what just happened. She tells me that they saw their real leader and were blinded by the truth of it. I ask who they saw. She points to the woman standing next to me. Who is middle aged and still wearing period dress. She smiles and looks at me knowingly. I tell her it is up to her to be good now. She nods in approval and promises to guide in positivity instead of darkness.

I return to the train for the journey back and walk from car to car looking for my companion I spent the trip with. She is no longer in the booth she was sitting in before. I wonder if the darkness lifting has affected her at all. I see her 'boyfriend' sitting off in a corner with some friends. He speaks in normal modern dialect and I gather his curse has been lifted as well, he is no leader and remembers nothing of his previous dark personality. I talk to him briefly and he doesn't recognize me.

I begin frantically going from carriage to carriage looking for her. She really is nowhere to be seen, I didn't see her get off the train and it doesn't make sense she wouldn't be traveling back. It begins to occur to me I may never see her again. A great grief overcomes me as I slump into the nearest chair, just staring into nothingness while I feel my eyes swell. It can't be I think. I knew she had feelings for me. I felt them. I remember the feeling of her skin. Her smile. The sweet smell of her hair. I sit in silence the entire return journey. People merrily chat around me as the mood is now lighter and people laugh while they tell stories of their adventure. I talk to no one.

When we arrive at our destination back where we began, everyone unloads and files into a large brightly lit dining hall, it is period decorated and fancy with many carved fixtures in the walls and chandeliers. I see my family come through large ornate glass doors into the hall to join me. I am sullen and depressed from losing my companion. We all sit at a large round table with white linens and fancy gold place settings. They are still dressed in period clothes holding accessories they picked up in their own respective adventure. They ask me what's wrong. I tell them I am exhausted, it was a 2 day train journey and I just don't feel well. They are concerned but allow me my space as I seem disengaged. I sit calmly not facing the stage, my eyes still heavy and glistening as I fight the nostalgia of my time with her.

Just then a worker walks onto the stage and gets everyone's attention. He thanks all of us for our participation and hopes we all enjoyed our journey on the express adventure. People cheer. He then says he'd like to introduce us to the one who made everything possible. Please give a round of applause everyone to our very own,
Brand new Model 2 Android!
People cheer louder and whistles can be heard.
I turn around to look and see her.
Out of period dress with a skin tight bodysuit and hair styled even shorter to her head.
It was her.
The truth of it hits me like a pile of bricks. I see her eyes avoiding me in the crowd as she glances around the room. Barely smiling she acknowledges the recognition in a sheepish manner. She won't even look at me. I am in complete disbelief. How could I not have known? I stare wantingly but realize everything I knew wasn't even real. The dream fades as I watch her face and the applause becomes quieter and quieter.

Monday Night, 4/27/20

I was playing in the ocean along with one or two companions. "Come on!" I said, rushing headfirst into the water, swimming as fast as I could. I was half experiencing, half simulating the ocean waves. Upon realizing there were no large waves crashing over me, I began to expect them which then led to their creation and my experience of having large waves tumble me about. The part of me that was scared was drowned out (no pun intended) by my overall sense that I was perfectly safe. A female friend came along with me past the large waves. We were then rapidly pulled far out to sea where the waters became deep and calm. My mind offered up a couple practical concerns. Aren't you worried about dangerous sea creatures the longer you're out here? How far off is land on the other side of this ocean? Won't you get tired of swimming and drown? I decided it was best not to think of dangerous sea creatures. I should simply focus on not splashing around too much. As to getting tired, I found I was able to easily swim at a fast pace with barely any effort. Later we transitioned to walking and gliding along the surface of the water.

As night approached, the Narrator said that we would need a place to rest for the night. A dark blue door with orange trim around it appeared. I knew exactly what it was the moment I saw it. I opened it and we stepped through, into my room. Inside it was arranged a little differently than waking life, with bunk beds and a couple random piles of blankets, pillows, and sheets laying around, but it was still fully recognizable. I also found there was a second door which I could open to the rest of the house. I walked around in the upstairs hallway then went back into my room again. Strange. I thought, while my friend just seemed obsessed with playing in the blanket pile and rubbing her face against the pillows. I opened the blue door once again to see that, indeed, it still led right out to the middle of the ocean. "You can change where the door leads." The Narrator informed me. I closed the door and reopened it to try it out. It no longer led to the ocean, now it led to a random room. I closed it for good this time and prepared for sleep, though I don't think I actually did fall asleep.

Spoiler for Additional Notes:

This one was so close to becoming a lucid dream. I had the awareness of dream control abilities, noticed the oddness of what I was observing, and then there was the presence of the Narrator dropping hints. The Narrator is a disembodied voice that shows up surprisingly often in my dreams and I've referred to it as my subconscious in the past. I'm starting to notice a clear pattern where it shows up when I'm either lucid already or I'm very close to becoming lucid. The ocean is another pre-existing dream sign of mine that's been showing up a lot lately. My relationship to the waves in dreams has gone through an interesting progression over the course of 20+ years of having those recurring dreams, but that's a post for another time. Apparently I'm plunging headfirst into them now.

I tend to have these dreams a lot especially when I feel really lonely, I meet a person in my dreams and we go on adventures and have fun and while I really love the dream and just want to spend eternity in them when I wake up I end up feeling even more alone.

This is kind of like an anime style dream because my companion was a younger version of an anime character on one of my favorite anime's, in this dream I move to the United States and it is my first day in school and my first class is History and I sit down next to this kid who is at least 3 years younger then me and I was in my dream 17 at the time. We introduce ourselves he says his name is Sam and I ask if we could share the history book because I don't have one and he says it's ok. We end up hanging out after that and talk about our lives and it turns out he is from the same country as I was and we both just moved here. My sister ends up taking a trip back to our mother country and I ask Sam if he wants to go along and we go back for vacation and we end up on this farm and there is a tractor the owner lets us drive around the dirt paths on and I told Sam he could go ahead and drive if I could borrow his history book and study so I we are on the tractor talking and I am studying as well.

And that is pretty much the end of the dream I wish I could remember more but I have this issue where I wake up and fall back asleep several times putting me into different dreams and I find it harder to remember the first dream. Unfortunately with my companions I never end up in another dream with them so I have to say goodbye to Sam. I will miss you kid, you were an awesome companion. I believe I have these dreams because it represents what I seek: the perfect best friend that you go on adventures with and hang out and of course one that doesn't end up hurting me psychologically or emotionally.

In this dream I was at some sort of sea world facility with my brother and we were trying to go see the killer whales. We were allowed into a indoor room with a pool that contained one of the orcas. The trainer there was nice enough to let us back there by the pool. I could see the orca swimming around and I really wanted to see it. I lay down next to the water of the pool and the orca jumps out of the water right next to me and I am able to pet it. Its skin is wet and feels a little damaged, probably due to being captive at a park(I do NOT agree with orca captivity). I just hang out with it for a decent amount of time there by the pool. I don't want to leave it but after about 10 minutes it decides to go swim in the water. I try to call it back but it is busy doing it's own thing. We open some underwater gates to see if the other orcas will come into the main pool to see us but no luck.

That has been the highlight of my dreams lately, and I was a bit sad waking up to find out it was just a dream.

havent updated in a while but this dream was important to me so i really wanted to share and archive it.

Non-lucid, Lucid, [Commentary written while awake]

I'm in an episode of Doctor Who that takes place in a big, artificial, vertical column that connects the center of the earth with outer space. I am the current companion, but I'm still me. The conflict in the episode centers around whether or not to set off a bomb at the bottom of the shaft that will blow up the Earth. Different characters present convincing arguments for both setting it off and not setting it off. The Doctor and I, of course, are trying to stop it from being set off. Also, there's a time loop, so we get to go back to earlier in time and get a second chance at stopping it from being set off. At some point [I think during the second loop], I become lucid and enjoy the experience. At the top of the shaft, which is in space, I have to jump through empty space and through a small, circular hole to get into an enclosed space that has air. It's a little scary, but I make it.

[This was a pretty cool dream, and I wish I could remember it in more detail.]

February 2, 2014

Review: dreamt rude guests prevent me from falling asleep. I finally 'fall asleep' and dream within a dream. About an evil salesman.

Rude Guests
Two random dudes are staying over, mom's treat. I'm trying to go to sleep, but its now past 3am and the two dudes are still being loud and annoying in the living room. I interupt their gaming several times but I was never able to tell them to just shut up and go to sleep.

It seems like a couple of more hours pass, meanadering through the house, waiting for some peace and quiet. Finally, its past 5am, the sun is rising and the two go to sleep. And when I went to the kitchen to grab some water they acted like I was now the rude one preventing their sleep.

I use the restroom and my little cousin harrasses me. And then finally, I crawl into bed and fall asleep.

Evil Salesman
A naive salesman is being shown the ropes. He's shown that he's really serious about this new gig, which looks like a pyramid scheme to me. His managers show him, or rather, pitch to him, how awesome this reward is if he makes all of his sales.

A brand new car! His managers must have repeated this lame ass pitch a hundred times before. I'm checking out this car reward. It's a total fake. Viewed from another angle you can see the car is a wreck. But whatever, the idiot is sold on his new sales gig.

The boss shows up and shows the new guy the other rewards and merchandise, just right behind the car. Some of this merchandise were perscription drugs being sold for a quarter of the price. But they were left outside to the elements and have spoiled rotten.

Finally I get pissed off and say "You can't sell these meds! They've gone bad! You'll kill someone!"

The boss didn't like me questioning him. But since I wasn't one of his lackies he just asks me to leave this private affair. Fine, whatever.

I walking away when my friend, Kitd, pulls me aside. She got into this business and but needs help getting out, it's a total mafia she explains. For talking to me in private like this, the big boss threatens her.

He curses and curses and threatens to kill her!

"Hey, you can't talk to my friend like that!"

But before I could fight the boss my friend insists we should make a run for it. Is she fast! I couldn't keep up. I try flying instead. We run/fly to an elevator. The boss was right behind us and catches the next elevator. The two elevators had a window so we can see each other. His eyes were murderous.

I slam on the window and threaten him back "If you lay a finger on her, I will kill you!"

From the elevator we make way to an airport. This was a futuristic airport, only the size of a room. The security here is fierce. My friend had an instant pass and I just flew over the security guards heads. But the boss couldn't get through so easily and the guards stopped him at the gates to see some proper ID. It bought us a few minutes.

We sit down at a strange terminal. My friend types in an address. Rather than a plane, this machine teleports you. In an instant, we are teleported to safety.

Was on a beach at early morning / late evening, with a very atmospheric setting in twilight (the actual word, not the franchise) looking like the picture below but with a bit darker horizon.


Two guys were fooling around next to me, acting like they could push each other by an invisible power, like the force in Star Wars. One of them turned to me and acted like he pushed me with air, and I played along, acting like I was getting shot backward. For fun, I let myself fall on my back into a pool of water formed in the sand. I felt my clothes get soaked and thought what a horrible idea that was. The guys told me in a serious tone to get out of the water, there might be dangerous creeps or animals in it.

The rest of the dream is hard to remember, with only flash memories of me swimming along the shore at an incredible speed, feeling very light and comfortable, and something about a ship and some people on the shore.

In this dream there was a huge white square, much like a billboard, or a huge theater screen but outside in the middle of a valley. I sat in the grass with two other unknown people, and when I looked at this screen, it would start "overloading my senses", sending me into something similar to a seizure. To explain in other words, when I looked at the screen, it started rapidly flashing black and white square patterns, sent a weird bass pressure pattern to my ears as if it was a mix of airplane-ear-popping and having a subwoofer on each side of my head. Looking at it gave me tunnel vision and the more I looked at it, the further away it seemed and the more my vision blackened out, sending me on the verge to faint. My eyes hurt and I felt nauseous. I looked away and avoided looking at the screen for the rest of the dream, in which I didn't do much of significance.

I have a feeling this dream was inspired by an occurrence while I attempted to fall asleep; I sat up in my bed and looked at the digital clock on my TV receiver when I felt dizzy, and it started seeming like the lights from the clock were way further away.

I dreamed that outside my room which is on the first floor, everything was dark, and you had a strong feeling of something watching you, almost like ghosts creeping around the hallway with malicious intents. There were people with me, but I don't remember who, and I don't remember our conversations. I walk down the stairs and come to the floor below. The feeling of being watched is stronger and grows more toward the feeling of being chased. The air gets more dense, the light in this hallway is slightly more of a red tone instead of the nightly dark blue tone. I start seeing corpses and carcasses, bloody rib-cages ripped open with the limbs torn off, lying around. A guy I'm with says we shouldn't go deeper. We go deeper anyways, down the next flight of stairs. As we go deeper, the place becomes more horrifying. More violent carcasses, red hellish lighting, and you can almost see and feel the malicious spirits move around in the air, gazing at us. We start hearing the screams of people getting murdered. Bones and carcasses still lay scattered around, like some messy slaughterhouse dealing with humans, except the place looked more and more like a cavern and was too dark to see far. A guy I'm with says: "We should stop here. If we go any further, the ones with four eyes will appear, and any further than that, they will tear our limbs off." I'm curious what those four-eyed things would be, so I want to keep going, before I come to the sudden realization that the corpses, carcasses and bodyparts weren't just brought here for decoration; something might do that to us. "Alright let's get out of here." I say, and we rush up the staircases, panicking more and more until we get back into my room and close the door.

I am facing an elevator, and I jumped inside. I am trying to escape something. I look at the numbers, and chose one. The number 10 lit up on the elevator. I think it's the top floor. I also "sensed" that there are some "floors" that lead to death, with some strange symbols on the list. I recall one was particular colored bloody red, outlined in black.

There are people in the elevator. I'm not sure if they were there when I entered, or if they entered along the floors. I vaguely remember stopping in one floor and deciding it's not the right place.

Finally, I reached the "right" place. The door opened, and I saw a line of people, facing right (if I look at them from inside the elevator), with a trail of people going to the left. They were not looking at the elevator, and none turned their heads when the door opened; they were looking directly ahead. They're wearing informal clothing.

I went out, along with a companion, and moved to the "right," the place where the line of people were looking. Then my companion (male) reminded me of my book. I saw I left it on the elevator floor. There were still some people inside. They were wearing formal clothing. I went in, picked it up, and left. The line of people are still there. Were they even planning to get inside the elevator?

I walked off, and saw the place is like a factory.

Mood: busy

NOTES: The keywords I wrote when I woke up: elevator, death, escape, left book inside elevator, turn right. I remember the elevator, book and turning right, but I'm not sure sure why death and escape were there, so I just tried to recreate it.

It all began with a prelude. These alien invaders from another planet who were way more advanced than us, had taken over a flying ship of ours and placed it in their mother ship. Now, the humans had no idea that they had been captured, so the aliens had to be sneaky. I'm in a secret room with 4 or 5 different people, all of them important in one way or another. We are inspecting this giant gold monolith that has been there for ages. It was emitting a faint aura around it, and humming. Me and 2 others decided to go out and investigate, while 3 people stayed behind. Somehow, we ended up in a forest, but it was extremely foggy. We all had a bad feeling and soon the other 2 guys were picked off. With them gone, I decided to run back, to see what else was happening. In the secret room, one man had been stabbed, and another was taking cover. The monolith was freaking out, changing colors rapidly and vibrating, so I touched it. When I did, it collapsed into one piece, melded into the floor, and a door opened. I entered, and now I was in the alien ship. It looked a lot like Halo 3, and there were some humans there as well, although it seemed they were there against their will. I scouted for an exit, and I saw a teleporting device straight ahead. I dashed to it, and when I jumped on it, I was catapulted over to another platform, this one just on the coastline. As I flew over, I could see that a full out war was taking place, this area obviously overrun with aliens. Then it turned into a video game, about who could run through the alien lines the farthest. A minimap appeared and also an upgrade screen. There were a few different types of enemies. There were small ones disguised as humans; there were giant plasma shooting aliens, seeker aliens, and several others. I ran in about 500m, dodging and weaving enemies, when I realized I could shoot back. I got an upgrade point, and decided to use it on the minimap.
"Why is it so difficult to see?" Asked a mysterious voice.
"It's the fog of war." I replied confidently, focusing more on my game
"Fair enough," it replied.
I was running back now, and I was asked by Edward how far I was.
"Not far at all." I said.
"I'm about 1000 meters out, but I'll wait for you until you get here."
This is the part where I woke up.
------------------------

I woke up into a lucid dream. Mr. Bean, Edward and I were in this area that resembled Medieval Rome. We were walking along, talking, and I'm not sure that they knew I was lucid. I told Mr. Bean about using the 5 senses to keep you lucid longer, and it seemed to me that he knew exactly what I was talking about. We walked a bit further, and I rubbed my hands together for better clarity. When I did, it was almost as if it got really bright, and then vividly clear. Either way, we stopped at this place near the water, and I remembered that I wanted to create my companion. Mr. Bean and I sat down, while Edward was up searching for something. I closed my eyes, and concentrated on my companion. A dragon. I had not given it too much thought, and that's why I made it a baby dragon. I opened my eyes, but it took a second for the dream to come back. I warned the 2 about the fact that the dream may collapse. My dragon appeared in front of me, curled up into a ball. I picked it up, snuggled it against my chest, and telepathically spoke to it.
"Your mine."
After I said these words, the dragon tingled a bit, like when you get goosebumps, and pushed it's claws gently into my upper right shoulder, like a cat would. I then remembered that I had wanted to fight my pet, so I summoned a sword. I wanted a Katana and a parrying dagger. When I opened my eyes, there was a barrel, but with nothing in it. I focused again, but this time it was a flimsy piece of metal that wobbled around. As me and the dragon faced off, an ambush struck. They were Arabian mercenaries, who had come to kill us. I still swung at my dragon, but nothing happened. So I ran around this square building to my right, attempting to flank the attackers. Ed was supposedly and apprentice witch(Wizard), and Mr. Bean was his master. But secretly, Mr. Bean doesn't want to teach Ed, because the road to the Archmagi is fraught with danger. Anyways, as I ran around, I saw a guy with a sling, and to shoot rocks at the others. I roared a battle cry as I ran toward him, distracting him. I swung at him, hitting him in the right shoulder, then the left shoulder. I missed the next swing and then hit in on the left side of his torso. My blade legitimately sucked ass; it was like a piece of sheet metal. The merc, wounded, decided to run. I said
"Eh, what the hell, it's my first battle."
So I chased after him. I rubbed my palms together, but it didn't clear up quite as much as I had wanted. I ran my hand against a wall as I was running, and the scene instantly became crystal clear. I chased him for a while, a few times getting close, but never stopping him. I heard him yell,
"We've never had this much trouble with an easy fight before! Maybe a medium fight, but not this!"
He then was cut off by the others. Now the others were an adventuring party, and we were in a place that more resembled Stormwind from WoW. My dragon was gone but I knew it would be back. We talked for a little while, before I ended the dream.


3 others and myself were walking around in an abandoned city. It turned into Gears of War, but with gigantic bosses; such as the Broodmothers, and a 50ft tall mutant spider. My gun interface was exactly like Red Dead, so another and myself decided to suicide bomb while the other 2 escaped. I got there a little later than the other guy, and he had stirred up some major trouble. I whipped out gun after gun, one of them was an AA12 auto shotgun. I saw a piece of pie in inventory that Ed gave me, and decided to eat it now. I had no dynamite, which confused me. Then, the scene changed dramatically to a period way back in time, about the 1600's. A scientist was talking to a wealthy man about his new discovery. He used Magnesium Sulfate and something else, to make a concoction that exploded.
(I searched Magnesium Sulfate the next day, and to my surprise, it WAS actually used in primitive explosives. I had no previous knowledge of this. )

---

I'm at an amateur skateboarding competition with a friend of mine. We, along with what seems like a hundred other skaters, enter a large flat area lined with quarter pipes. All the participants stand on top of the ramps facing the center, where several people in charge are introducing the event. They begin to pass the microphone around and each person is urged to say something.

Several people babble about nothing, but I remember thinking they sounded cool. I worried about how I would come off. My companion was passed the microphone and, in my opinion, made a solid impression on the crowd. The microphone was then handed to someone else. Then to me. I said in a sarcastically monotonous voice, "Fuck the police, comin' straight from the underground. Young negro got it bad cause I'm brown." Most of the crowd thought it was pretty funny. I looked around to make sure I didn't upset anyone and passed the microphone on.

This is the last I remember of this portion of the dream. To the best of my knowledge, it preceded the following dream.

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