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    1. Pop star villain, weed from clee, kicking mom, and kilp conflict

      by , 08-18-2010 at 01:33 PM
      PART 1 - POP STAR CAPTURED BY HEROS

      Pop star villain who looks similar to Lady Gaga is captured in giant plane by two 16 year olds. They force her to hang outside the cockpit, this makes her pass out so she is not a threat.

      They're superheros, that's their character, that's the story... one male and one female who take complete control of the environment through technology, like their big plane, and trap villains.

      ANALYSIS

      Pop star could represent superficiality.

      - - -

      PART 2 - WEED FROM CLEE, KICK MOM

      At home in my room, I almost buy some weed from Clee (friend.) I have my money out and everything. I'm facing my closet, the weed is on my bed, we're about to exchange... but I change my mind at the last moment.

      I follow Clee outside for courtesy, to hang out while he smokes a cigarette, to be cool since I didn't buy from him.

      On the way out, mom is laying on the floor at the door of the bathroom/bottom of the stairs (sort of both, dream merge), talking with my aunt (who is standing.)

      Mom says something along the lines of "every fit person has a hot person they work out with," some limiting belief that she uses to justify her lack of fitness to herself.

      This frustrates me. I get super pissed and attack her, kick her in the head. Aunt is disgusted, "doesn't understand why you can't just be chill."

      Clee and I get to the door, I put on my shoes - they're black, bigger than normal, firm and puffy.

      We were going to train but it turns out to be raining quite heavily. I put on an act of being upset, even though I didn't really want to anyway - I was only being accommodating.

      ANALYSIS

      Almost buy weed - because I've been considering changing up my meditation schedule, the thought of getting some occurred to me yesterday, but I decided against it.

      Follow Clee outside/pretend upset/accommodating - literal representation of behavior patterns around this person.

      Mom laying down - likely represents her weakness, given up on life. Aunt there to support her justifications.

      - - -

      PART 3 - KILP CONFLICT

      Kilp (Jr High classmate) is outside. He threatens me, throws a knife my direction. It lands in the dirt in front of me, as a message that he's "out to get me." He makes some jokes about me to someone else.

      I pull the knife out of the ground, throw it up in the air, and it lands exactly in my sheath. Kilp says something sarcastic about "winning his heart" by this display. I say "all mine," double meaning that I will literally take his heart.

      ANALYSIS

      Perhaps triggered by negative social events at work, feeling "looked down upon," an expression of a desire to fight back.

      - - -

      FRAGMENTS

      Door breaks off, upper class family...

      Use toilet positioned in middle of stage, in front of an audience for a SC1 tournament...

      Jee visits me, in my room, have chat...

      ANALYSIS

      The toilet being right on stage seems like an obvious metaphor for self consciousness.

      Anyway, I think I need more sleep. I don't feel "refreshed" upon waking up, always tired and groggy. Currently I go to bed at around 12 and wake up at 7. Will see if I can gradually fall asleep at earlier times, beginning with 11.

      Updated 08-18-2010 at 01:38 PM by 30838

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      non-lucid