17th October 2020 Fragment: Remember being my lizard form at some point and also for quite a while. Earlier in the dream I was offered a choice (by whom or what?) to have either nearly unlimited strength or nearly unlimited stamina. I picked strength. I remember flying through several somewhat surreal places with hybrid dragon wings that would appear and disappear. At one point, I'm in a sandy beach area and there are wasps or bees and I stamp on them, concerned for a second about what I was doing, but then remembering I had nothing to fear. This was pre-lucid, I had some awareness of being dreaming. In some other part, I'm destroying the outer structure of a concrete sky scraper and I'm eating or biting on people as they fall from the building. The building itself is falling and we are miles up in the air, impossibly high away from any other buildings. (Reminds me of UT levels) Rest of recall is muddled. Was awake for a while and forgot to try and retain recall properly. Notes: - The part of me that convinced me to fear nothing was the same that has come about unconsciously before. I have started to feel a much more direct connection to these parts of myself over the last months; these are the parts of me that do not actively speak through my mind except seemingly under rare circumstances such as in the visualisations I've done/experienced. These are parts of myself that I've had some sort of tacit awareness of for quite a long time but that previously I wasn't able to consciously "put my finger on". In more physical terms, the less conscious parts feel like something inside at the back of my head, but maybe this is some association I have created by accident. - I have absolutely no recall anymore about how the choice of "strength vs stamina" was offered to me, but I feel it was some sort of interface. I do seem to remember that in the dream my reasoning was that if I had unlimited stamina, it wouldn't necessarily allow me to do everything that I wanted to do. I think my experience of being weak when I was younger had some influence on this too. Lately there's been a fair bit of "processing" of some of my childhood, such as those instances recently where I was actually younger in my dreams. - Flight and flying by own means hasn't really ever been of any special interest to me in dreams but I think the experience with wings was novel enough for me to enjoy it, though I still prefer it when flight in dreams happens by use of a jet or space ship.
Morning of July 1, 2016. Friday. My wife Zsuzsanna and family as we are now are living back on Stadcor Street in Brisbane. Our youngest son first notices a caterpillar which moves quite fast. I tell people not to touch it as it has long hairs (though I honestly am not certain if it is poisonous in this way). It seems to crawl unnaturally fast at times but is not really a threat; only a curiosity. It is somewhat of a deep blue color. Eventually, it seems to make a cocoon after we have it in a large rectangular plastic tub full of dirt. We are out on the back porch, seemingly early in the morning. As I watch, the cocoon moves rapidly over its body like a transparent skin. There is interest concerning when it will become a moth or butterfly. Almost as soon as the cocoon is formed the caterpillar changes as the “skin” now disappears and it becomes a large moth that flies upward. It is almost like a small bird. This is a curious and more direct waking transition utilizing the typical consciousness displacement flight symbol in leaving the dream state. A cocoon can be seen as a dream sign (analogous to the sheet or blanket that covers the sleeping dreamer) as, additionally in this case, a moth is attracted to moonlight. A caterpillar, especially in a cocoon, is a waking precursor that implies the liminal space on a more subdued level. The moth has a crescent moon design on its wings, which indicates the dream state itself (moon induction) as now waning in relationship to the circadian rhythms and biological nature of the dream state and dream stability and continuity. As I wake while we stand on the back porch, while watching the moth fly up and away, our youngest son is to my right and I am facing the outer wall of the bedroom where Zsuzsanna and I had slept while living at that house (dream sign and waking reference).
Updated 03-14-2017 at 07:09 PM by 1390
My dream recall is still quite bad, but from time to time I still have a vivid lucid fortunately. I wake up. I'm in bed at my parents place, and immediately I notice that something feels completely off. I get up and investigate my surroundings. Most of my stuff is missing. I used to have a tv here, and an old computer I turned into a fileserver. All of that, including my desk, all of it is gone. Everything feels sort of dull and grey, like I'm not really aware. Awareness? I wonder if I'm dreaming. Yes! I must be! I rub my hands. Weird, doing so feels very vivid and intense, why is everything so grey? I decide it is not the dream that is not vivid/stable, but that my room isn't lit properly. I open the window of my room wanting to jump out. What is this? Everything is so green. I am in a tropical forest. What is my parents house doing in a tropical forest? I jump down to investigate further. There are small lakes everywhere and the air is very fresh. I follow one of the lakes enjoying the nice air, feeling the wind on my skin and looking at the sun rays shining through the leaves of the trees covering the sky. Somehow I feel attracted to a specific location not far away. Once I get there I find a caterpillar on a big leaf. It is very colorful and excited. Why do I know it is excited? I can clearly feel it. I approach it and look at it very closely. It's moving to the edge of the leaf and lets itself hang down from the edge. It quickly transforms into a chrysalis. How interesting, will I see it transform into a butterfly? I can feel excitement yet again. But it is not my excitement, it is the one of the caterpillar. It becomes clear to me that I can somehow feel what the caterpillar is feeling. It is afraid. Afraid because it knows it's whole body is about to be turned upside down, all it's organs rearranged. But this feeling is completely overwhelmed by the excitement of becoming a butterfly, and being able to fly. As it's body starts transforming, the soon to be butterfly is starting to dream. It dreams about being a butterfly and flying through the skies. It is no longer worried, just extremely excited. At some point I think about telling it to control its excitement, or else it might wake up. But then I realize I wouldn't know how to do that. The butterfly wakes up, knowing that the metamorphosis is completed. It emerges from the chrysalis and spreads its wings. They are very beautiful, with very strong tones of orange red and yellow. Even though the butterfly is so excited to fly, it has to wait until its wings are hardened. Once they are, the butterfly takes off and flies high off into the sky. It immediately knows how to fly and how to be a butterfly, even though it was a caterpillar all its life.
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