Recent DJ Posts

I'm in a bombed-out bus that's been converted into a trolley that is currently being used as a taxi cab in what looks like 60's-era Vietnam in Full Metal Jacket. I'm having a lot of trouble communicating with the other passenger seated across from me that I don't understand Vietnamese. But I happen to speak Taiwanese, and by Dream Logic, I realize that the two languages are only two steps removed from each other, and are close enough that we are now able to have a conversation. This sequence fades before we can talk, though.

Now I'm hanging around my actual house. I'm watching an NBA game while also playing a video game on my tablet. I focus on the TV, and I recognize LeBron James (Heat), Vince Carter (Raptors), Yao Ming (Rockets -- I'm not watching an All-Star game, and yes, the timing is off, for those who follow sports); and when an on-screen "who's on the court now" graphic flashes, one of the forwards is Bob Odenkirk from Mr. Show. Yes, Saul Goodman is somehow holding his own against a bunch of NBA superstars from the 2000's. I will pay money to watch this happen in real life.

I focus on my tablet, and the game I'm playing is World of Warcraft-esque, but now that I focus on the game, I'm transported into the game as an actual character. I'm in a dungeon, a lot like DOS-era Prince of Persia with a lot of stairs winding up in right angles. There is a platform in the middle that holds the sacred... Block of Cheese. Um.

ANYWAYS, a rival wizard is nearby, and I have to prevent him from getting to that cheese before me. But he is more powerful than I am, and in a bid to stall for time, I taunt him and engage him into a belching contest. Just for the record, I am not this crass in person. I briefly turn into Eric Cartman for this contest. I burp a poisonous green gas, while the other wizard burps fire. When our burps collide, it causes an explosion. We keep one-upping each other until finally, the wizard gets really frustrated (I think it's because he's had enough of such childish antics. I know I would've been). Instead of going after the cheese, he teleports next to me, fully intent on destroying me. It's at this time that I got a good look at him, and he resembles Tim the Enchanter from Monty Python. He has his arms raised to annihilate me.

But ah ha! I'm not a wizard. I'm a goddamned Paladin, and as he realizes that he made a mistake of coming within melee range, I catch him in a sticky trap (mocking him in Cartman's voice again) and proceed to pummel him like a punching bag. At one point of my overly-violent behavior, I actually visualize me punching the punching bag in my gym, FPS style, and even pause so I can look at my movelist like I'm in Street Fighter. I wake up.

I'm the worst Paladin ever.

I wrote down notes for this a few days ago, but I never fleshed them out into narrative form. It would take a lot of work to do that now, and I'd probably forget some details, so I'm just going to post the notes:

[INDENT][RIGHT][SIZE="1"][COLOR="#808080"]09.01.2011[/COLOR][/SIZE][/RIGHT]
[SIZE="3"][COLOR="Black"]1/9/11 - 2[/COLOR][/SIZE] [SIZE="1"][COLOR="#808080"](Non-lucid)[/COLOR][/SIZE]

[SIZE="1"][COLOR="#808080"]NON-DREAM[/COLOR] [COLOR="#1E90FF"]DREAM[/COLOR] [COLOR="#DC143C"]LUCID[/COLOR][/SIZE]

[COLOR="#808080"][/COLOR][COLOR="#1E90FF"]

1) at desk on computer talking to some guy

2) Mr C's place looking for LD stuff see people I know look for Rockies jersey? get food put it down can't find it later write note about my dad Mr. S yells at me I wait for NBA and BS to go to school but it's 7:55 and they don't I'm afraid of being late can't find my school stuff but run out anyways hitchhike get a car outside of grocery store another car drives along and helps the driver is a scuba diver I tell her that's cool I get to school on time see genitals on the ground in a puddle of fluid must've been cut off disgusting i go into main office ask for stuff there are funny secretaries there kind of like BF and I I'm afraid to in public I'll get laughed at I go on computer to input information but it asks if I'm from Hull[/COLOR][/INDENT]

[INDENT][RIGHT][SIZE="1"][COLOR="#808080"]05.01.2011[/COLOR][/SIZE][/RIGHT]
[SIZE="3"][COLOR="Black"]1/5/11 - 5[/COLOR][/SIZE] [SIZE="1"][COLOR="#808080"](Non-lucid)[/COLOR][/SIZE]

[SIZE="1"][COLOR="#808080"]NON-DREAM[/COLOR] [COLOR="#1E90FF"]DREAM[/COLOR] [COLOR="#DC143C"]LUCID[/COLOR][/SIZE]

[COLOR="#808080"][/COLOR][COLOR="#1E90FF"]1) There's a lacrosse stick in my trash bin. I want to give it to someone as a Christmas gift, but someone takes it. I watch them take it but don't chase after them. I don't want anyone to know I'm giving it to them so I'll just let the person take out my trash. Running after him would let everyone know.

2) continuation of 1??? I'm walking along the wall of a high-rise. I can see that I'm many stories above the ground and am in some kind of office building. I deliver?? bags of clothing to Mrs. M. NBA and I go to the doorway, which is an entrance to the game where you skate down a long slope to cut pizzas. The entire slope is lined with pizzas and the goal is to slice as much as possible. We skate down, turning and curving to cut the pizzas as much as we can in one trip down.

We get to the bottom and look into the door to the kitchen. Our boss comes out and gives us our next task??? He goes back inside and we can see a girl sweeping the alley we just came down. She has long dark hair and is singing as she works.

NBA? and I fly to a building a few blocks down and we walk down a hallway? DM? JT? Go go up a ladder and embark on some sort of quest.

At the end, we're all in the parking lot of a concenience store and it's time to go to college. One kid says he's going to Cornell and the other one is going to the University of Nevada. We walk down a long farm road and see a New Hampshire? license plate. We talk about "B Fad Pump Control," which is a wiki I actually like. The movie ends and the title appears on the screen: Eni & Enoi.

3) I walk into Toronto with my parents. It looks just like Chicago - the streets are similar and the buildings rise high. I think Giordano's is just a block away and I mention this to my parents.

4) continuation of 3?? I'm in a basement somewhere (Mexico???????) with KD, NT, and JD. They're all lying in a large bed, and I go and lie down too. One of them asks to swap places with me, which we do.

We go above ground and have to cross the street. There's a Kentucky Fried Chicken???? [/COLOR][COLOR="#808080"](I think we might be in the same city as the one in 3.)[/COLOR][COLOR="#1E90FF"]

5) We're in a van driving by the ocean. A huge wave comes ashore and spreads across the land, which is pretty cool. It's only a few inches of water that goes under our van.[/COLOR][/INDENT]