Recent DJ Posts

So, I have been watching a lot of Youtube videos on mediatation, chakra balancing, heart-brain coherence, past lives regression, afterlife, OBEs and binaural beats on all of the above subjects.

About a week ago I had a WILD with some Alpha GPC and galantamine.

1. I asked to be shown something spectacular. At first I whisper the request, then I remember how interesting it feels when you talk out loud in a lucid, and I start shouting it out.

After phasing through many walls through what seemed to be an empty underground garage/storage space, I enter a huge office room. Dozens and dozens of single seat desks with young people. The room is very colorful. Lots of blues and reds. I look closer, and everybody is building legos, lol. It's a "test kitchen" for legos, haha. People are building them to test them.

I think the dream was caught by surprise by my request, because I sensed some hesitation, as if it didn't know what to show me, haha.

2. After I walk through the lego room and the last wall, I end up outside. I ask to see my past life. I'm shown pictures that are displayed in front of me on a large old fashioned 35 mm film in the air. I see some images and to each of them I say No, no, no... Few pictures show a cemetary and I say NOPE, NOPE.

But the dram is not really listening and I end up laying in a very shiny black coffin with the part by head opened, so I can see outside. I'm looking at this from above as the coffin is slowly sinking into soft mud.

So, I think I'm done asking for past lives for a while haha.

Deliberate OBE.
This morning around 6 am my cat woke me up making noise with some plastic bags. I told him to stop and he did. Then he did it again, I had to get up and hide it. I was a bit annoyed because I had last hour to sleep and was worried I won't be able to fall asleep again.

But as soon as I layed down I felt vibrations. Not very strong and they were not too concentrated.

I start saying UP, UP, OUT and as I'm laying on my side with by back to the window, I start to feel headrush and I'm moving with my back leading the way towards the window.

I remember I wanted to see my body, so with great effort I stop moving through the window and I walk back to my sofa. The room is same dark as in WL, illuminated with few night lights. Just enough to see that I'm not on the sofa. The layout is the same and I feel that it is my real IWL room.

Then I remembered to check the top of the kitchen cabinet to see if the things I left there few years ago are still there and what it is. (I left there some things when doing OBE experiments).

It's hard to move and I remember that I have to practice navigating and moving in the astral.

When I get outside, I'm somewhere else, not in front of my apartment. Some kind of underground garage with thick concrete walls, well illuminated. Out of the room comes out a man, who I know is my husband. I'm all excited to tell him "I just had a first conscious OBE". I have a little bit of trouble pronouncing "conscious". He is happy for me.

Then I look at my hands and I say "look I have no body" but I see my normal looking hands. Only one finger is a bit shorter, as if I lost the tip in some accident, but it healed already. I'm disappointed because in Astral, we don't have a body. I try this one more time later, and i have the same human looking hand. I can even recognize it as mine in WL.

THANK YOU!

I think I discovered something pretty freaky. It's happened twice now, so there must be some significance.

I believe I actually had a past life, and I've been seeing memories of this past life in my dreams. At first there were black and white grainy visions of people from the times of what looked like World War 2 that I've mentioned in a past entry. I know I've never seen those people before. The message I got from the visions is that I was in WW2, but I never put it together until now. Those visions happened a few months ago, so I never really thought anything of them. But... Maybe like 40 minutes ago, I awoke from another pretty freaky dream. It was 1998 in the dream, and I was back to being 2 years old. My vision was a little grainy too... My parents couldn't understand me when I tried to say anything and I spent almost the entire dream trying to convince them that my consciousness was transferred from 2016 back to 1998 somehow.

However, there was this other part, where I stepped into the bathroom and I was instantly in the early to mid 60's. My parents hadn't even been born yet. My vision was far more grainy and there was a TV in the room, with some sort of late night talk show. There was a man and woman being interviewed, although the woman seemed to be the focus of the show. She was showing some sort of dress to the audience... She must have been a clothing designer. I don't remember what the dress looked like, but... Let's just say it totally wouldn't be in style right now. The show was focused on the dress for a little bit and then the program fizzled out.

I sort of remember what the woman looked like...

Time to do a bit of research.

Some more from the past. Undated, Early August 2014:
We were reborn as children (5-6? yrs old) like in that movie, but there were somehow 3 of us instead of 2 (bf and I). The other me? didn't want to continue being with us, and said so and left. Just as I was about to tell bf (I still did later), our video connection got cut off on the laptop and the vehicle (a boat?) stopped suddenly, flinging me across the floor, with my laptop & white russian (drink) in hand. The drink fell overboard but me and the laptop got caught on the rails, and my new dad went over to console me.

Extra notes at the bottom:

• We remembered everything from past life
• What was that song?
• Cartoony angels at some point
• Woke up crying

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August 18th, 2014:
Virtual reality goggles, bunny rabbit as a pet

So I've recently joined this site, and thought I'd put up a few things I wrote down. I don't regularly maintain a DJ, but I have a notebook I keep random notes and stuff in, and I put a few dreams in there.

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No date on this one, by location in notebook, I estimate end of 2013:
Stuck in cave with many other people, blast it open but water rushes in, have to swim out of the opening, but it's underneath the water. Most people not having any trouble, but I keep floating on top weakly instead of being able to dive down. Air is running out, I have to hurry. Finally swim out into an airport.
(I remember this one had something to do with terrorists, but I guess I was too lazy to write down the rest of the dream. Also, I think the airport kind of looked like a mall for some reason.)

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No date on this one either, probably summer 2014:

• Anna (my name in this dream for some reason), have to save someone whose name starts with a D, Dom? Dido?
• Short blade
• There's some kind of virus, it grows out of love into violence (causing people to be violent to the ones they love)
• The virus spreads to her children (Anna's?)
• Some kind of enemy army nearby (set in a much older time, think around Mongolian era or older)
• Someone yelled 'Anna, no!'
• I (being Anna) stab myself in the stomach and fall on my back

(This one I remember actually feeling the warmth of the blood and as I died (not instantly) I woke up. Weird stuff.)

---

This one was written immediately after the last one in same pen, looks continuous. I think they happened in the same night:

• Jumped from ~20th floor, felt like all my organs and body hurt but I was mostly fine and walking around like normal
• Went back up in an elevator
• No intention of dying, I must have been locked out on the balcony by someone?

---

I've got about 3 more in this notebook here, slightly longer ones. I'll post them later.

Dream - Lucid

I was in an elementary school front office. I saw many women working there, and many working on computers in the back. I walked up to my mom, who was one of the women working on the computers. I "remembered" that this was her job now. She seemed content.

Then, a girl at the front desk gave Dallas and I some drinks that looked like orange and red Kool-Aid drinks that used to come in the bottles (Kool-Aid Jammers?). She had stolen them to give them to us for the movie we were going to see. Her boss, a woman, asked her if she had stolen them. She said no, even though she obviously did.

We were then leaving so we could get to the movie on time. This is around when I became lucid.

I spoke to my husband for a long time. We spoke of past lives, I discovered he was in many. I asked about my mom, and saw an image of her as I did. I knew she was in some past lives as well; I knew before I even asked. A random DC appeared that had traditional African clothing on. I asked if he was in a past life, but he disappeared; he was just a regular DC. I remember something about the name Mary; it wasn't a coincidence that the people in my life have the names they do. I thought of all the Marys I knew (Mary Katherine is my best friend IWL, for example; I thought about this at this point in the dream). Dallas and I were on a lake at night for part of this dream.

I then was walking through a mall. I felt the dream was about to end. Before I woke up, I saw many stores with signs lit by neon green lights. I felt like this is where the movie theater was located.

~

I was determined to return to this lucidity to meet up with my spirit guide and find out his true form. I kept falling back into sleep and immediately being lucid, but I would wake again very shortly; the dream was not stable enough.

Finally though, I re-entered sleep and stayed. I was lucid immediately; I felt SP and saw the dream forming. I waited a little bit before I went and did anything; I knew I had to stabalize first and foremost.

The dream finally felt good enough for me to continue. To increase the stability a bit more, I examined my hands, and thought about what Hyu said to me about using your senses to increase stability. I used my sense of touch. I was walking through my family's kitchen, and felt everything I came across. I touched the counters, etc. The sensation felt a bit "muted" but it really did help. I thought for sure the dream would fall apart before this.

I then was inside somewhere, walking down a wooden hallway, when I knew that I wanted to see my spirit guide. At first, I said
"Dream guide appear!" but realized my error and corrected myself to
"Spirit guide appear!"
I then saw a shadow behind me. I looked behind me, and saw what looked like a girl I knew growing up named Jess.
"Wow, this is tricky," he said, referring to taking on other forms.
It didn't matter; I knew it was him. He looked like Jess, but had the voice of a man.

I then started to feel as if I was losing the dream. I said to my guide
"Please! Keep me in the dream!"
He held onto me and things started to stabalize again. This happened a couple of times throughout the dream.

We were then walking into a restaurant. It resembled a Cracker Barrel. We sat down at a table with a couple at it. He said to them
"Excuse me, may we join you?"
The table had dirty dishes and food on some of the dishes. We sat with them. We were across the table from one another. We were speaking, and I asked him his name.
"Mike," he said. He then called me "Bethany".
"Was that my name?"
"Yes, you were very proud of me," he said. He was referring to a past life we had shared together.
I had brief thoughts that he was a musician of some sort.
"Mike, may I see your true form?" This was part of my goal for an LD.
He replied, saying something about the way he would look, but I can't remember exactly what he said.

We stood up. He then started to change. His head went down into his shirt; it was kind of comical. He then emerged, mostly, having his now tuxedo shirt and jacket part way over his head, which was partially stuck inside the shirt.
He was a homely, red-haired middle-aged man. He was tall and skinny. I then asked him
"May I see what I looked like?"
I was then looking in a mirror on the wall. The mirror was a bit high for me (I'm quite short, even IWL). He instructed me on how to change my reflection. I don't remember exactly what he said, but I waved my hand in front of my eyes. In the mirror, I saw my eyes change. I kept going, and my whole face changed. I saw that I was missing a tooth also. I was a homely, kind-looking middle-aged woman with thin, fine wispy hair. I kept going even after this, and my face morphed into a rat's face. Oops, too far. I said something about this to my guide, and he joked about the rat face.

We were then sitting down again, and speaking of something, when my husband's alarm woke me up.

~

Alright, well I didn't end up going back to sleep after all, but I did get a chance to think a little more on this.

Before I went to sleep, I thought about becoming lucid, about situations that could induce lucidity, etc. I imagined it happening as I was falling asleep.

Wow, intention is such a powerful thing! I did not become lucid until early this morning, but that is the norm for my lucidity.

I do believe that I am finally starting to see the power of my mind; I am finally being able to tap into things that I once thought I would never be able to do. I am finally, finally coming into my own, and being able to use my intent, and actually believe that it's going to work instead of having doubt tower over me. This feels legit. I am absolutely amazed.

Now, I need to figure out what to do next. I think that I just need to let things flow, and when I meet my guide in my dreams, I'll know who he is now, hopefully, and that in itself will induce lucidity. I really hope that this journey I am on continues. I will, of course, keep you all posted.

creepy one last night. i drempt i was in a lucid dream within a normal dream. i dont remember much, but i remember there being these corredors, and a woman was with me throughout the dream. she had short red hair, and quite pretty. as the dream ws coming to a close, i asked her who she was. she turned to me ad said " i was your wife in a past life"....and then i woke. it ws very strange, as before i woke up and just after she said it i felt like i was remembering something...

Notes:

I did some guided meditation towards learning about some of your past lives (Props to MoSh for that!) and I had one of the most memorable experiences I have ever had.

I learned a lot about what I thought was a "other" existence, but is actually a past life unfolding slowly to me.

Dream:

The dream was probably partially caused by the visualizations that were done during the meditation.

I was on a train boarding platform, the kind that you would be on right before getting on an old style steam train. The train was in the station, behind me. I do not remember what the weather was like at the time of the dream. I remember arguing about politics for some reason with a random person, I then got on the train, and found my seat. The train starts to roll out of the station, and I remember no more of the dream.

I am a young east Indian woman living in an impoverished area with near a beach. I live with my husband, his parents, and another woman whom I call Auntie. My mother-in-law (MIL) and Auntie dote on me because I have no family of my own and I am pregnant. My husband and my father-in-law (FIL) work long hours during the day and are not around very often. In many ways the family is very traditional, but in other ways surprisingly liberal, as they permitted the marriage to my husband even though I was already pregnant with someone else's child. MIL and Auntie are convinced the child will be a boy, FIL remains silent on the issue, and my husband (who is always very kind to me) thinks it will be a girl becuase everyone else thinks it will be a boy. I do not tell my family, but somehow I instinctively or psychically know what the gender of the child is, and it is a girl.

The dream jumps ahead a few months and I have given birth to a girl like I knew I would. Despite wanting a boy, MIL and Auntie are happy to have a new addition to the family. The dreams jumps ahead again (it does this frequently) to when I am pregnant with my second child. I psychically know the child will be a boy but say nothing to the family since I know they are all hoping for a boy anyway. About the time I give birth to my son, FIL retires and it is up to my husband to support all of us by himself. We care very much for each other but we rarely get to spend time along together because of family obligations or one or both of us being too exhausted.

The dreams jumps ahead again. My daughter is now five years old and my son is now two. I am pregnant yet again. I have grown very close to MIL and Auntie but their traditional superstitions have them believing that bad fortune will befall the family soon. Unlike the previous pregnancies I have trouble telling what gender this child will be. I think it is a boy, though every time I close my eyes, put my hands on my belly and concentrate, a horrible sense of coldness and dread overcome me, but not because I sence anything evil, more like I am being engulfed in a vast, endless dark void. I do not tell anyone of these feelings.

Bad fortune does seem to befall the family early in my pregnancy though, as my husband loses his job, Auntie turns to prostituion for money, MIL falls ill and FIL becomes very depressed. FIL will not eat and soon he falls sick and dies. We have very little money from Auntie's street walking to buy food, and thus definately cannot afford to pay for creamation or ceremonial rites, so we have no choice but to leave FIL's body rotting in the streets just outside of our dismal hovel. MIL is soon consumed by a similar dispair that took FIL and we all fear that she will die soon. One night Auntie goes out to work the streets and never returns and all we can do is assume the worst.

When I am eight months pregnant a tall skinny man arrives at the door of our meger lodgings and claims to be my brother (he does look like one of my bros in real life actually). He says that he is worried about me having so many children and thinks that I should stop. My husband and MIL throw him out and warn him never to come back. The next morning there is a basket of fresh white lotus flowers outside of our door, which I am able to sell to street vendors and pedestrians for a few coins each because they are considered good luck by many people. MIL wants me to keep one for myself but I ignore her and sell the last one because I want to be able to afford to feed my newborn when it comes along. Almost immediately a terrible pain erupts in my abdomen and blood starts gushing from my vagina. I somehow make my way home, but it is too late - I have miscarried what would have been my second son. MIL and my husband are very sad and they shun me for awhile, which makes my grief over losing my third child even worse.

The dreams jumps ahead again and our family is experiencing more favourable times. I am close to MIL again, who is no longer sick or depressed, my husband is employed again, our surviving children are healthy and being educated, and I am pregnant again. This one is going to be a girl and I tell my MIL that I am able to predict the gender of the child, but didn't say anything before out of fear of being accused of insanity or witchcraft and being thrown out of the house. To my surprise MIL is very happy at my psychic ability and tries to convince me to use my powers to make money. I refuse because I fear that if I reveal to some expecting couples that they will have a girl rather than a boy, they will then voluntarily abort the female fetus or abandon the baby girl upon birth (which is a very real problem in India actually).


The dream ends there.

I believe this may be a past life dream.