Recent DJ Posts

In a crowded section of New York City, flames erupt from the sewers as Satan himself rises from hell and bursts through the pavement of the road ahead of me, sending cars flying through the air and people running and screaming in all directions. He has a gang of demons around him, all made of flames, forming a painful looking perimeter of death and destruction around the Devil.

I am holding a dark gray cat, almost black, with white on its face and some of its paws I don't remember picking it up, but it seems to like being held. I cradle it on its back like a baby in my left arm, against my side, and hold its tail out in front of me like a cannon. I aim it at the Devil and make my best "Pew Pew!" noises. Almost like a "pshhyeeeoo!!!" As I make my very best laser noises, bright blue laser beams shoot out of the cats tail. They move through the air at about the speed of a jogger, so Satan easily dodges them.

I run toward Satan, aiming the cat's tail a few paces ahead of him and with "Pew Pew Pew Pew!" shoot four slow moving lasers out of the cat's tail into Satan's path. I almost got him this time! With great enthusiasm I go wild with my best "Pew Pew!" noises, filling the streets and alleys with blue lasers. 'If I shoot lasers everywhere, I can't miss.' I tell myself.

Satan dives behind a sky scraper and out of sight. I pre-fire a few laser blasts from the cat's tail down the next street in case he tries to run for it, and then run down the alley to cut him off before he can get away. He gave me the slip somehow, and I haven't got a clue where to find him now. I find myself at a busy intersection, looking every which way as traffic flows through. Next to me is a fire fighter and a cop. They look at me, then at the cat I'm cradling in my arm, and then at how I'm holding the cat's tail out in front of me with my other hand, and then look back to me.
"Check this out" I tell them as I aim the cat's tail in a harmless direction and say "Pew Pew Pew!" sending three bright blue laser beams slowly through the air.
"That's pretty cool" they tell me.
"I know, right?!"
"Aren't you going to film it or take a picture or something?" The firefighter asks me.
"No, I don't think anyone really needs to know about this. Plus I've gotta get Satan"
They both give me an understanding nod, and I start walking away as I think about where to look.

i think the world is closing in on me, on us.

i am in the middle of a body of water with some other people... my cousins, my friends.

no. i am in the middle of my first room in my first house. all of my things are of my childhood. i wear a flannel of thick thick denim that is too big for me. in the pocket is an icecream sandwich and two dollars.

now everyone's in a rush to get out of here. i pack a bag, i pack fiction.. no what does fiction do for you? nothing. i pack "be here now" and throw out two other books. i run around the house.

me and a lady know where to go... up the stairs but before we leave them behind, chime the first man. what does that even mean. i take my nails and search a wall and find a secret door. it opens vertically. inside, a man is playing piano. he disappears and i dont remember which notes to play. i dont play any.

the lady i'm with is frantic "we must play the notes!" "you do it then!" she does. we run up stairs to chime the second man.

now i am walking but instead of walking i swim through the air. i swim over to a pew, i am in a church that slopes up almost vertically like a movie theater, the last pews are the highest and the first ones closest to the pulpit are the lowest.

the lady is sitting on the pew with her father. she is nervous because she is practicing for mock trial. she has to be a mock lawyer as part of some class she's in.

"i took this class in high school" i said. "i was the time keeper." she calms down and asks me to get her something to eat. she wants an egg and cheese sandwich.

i walkswim all the way up the slope, curve around to the other side of the church and enter a doorway. i'm in line at dunkin donuts now, and if i look over the edge of where i am i can see the church. its kind of like a catwalk.

i search thru my pockets and find two dollars. i search thru the pockets of the denim jacket and find the ice cream (not melted) and three 10 dollar bills. i take them. i look again, they are three 30 dollar bills. i focus more. they are three 300 dollar bills. holy shit! i look closer....they are fake, they are bookmarks, they advertise a library. fuck you.

i get to the counter. i order it, and they give it to me immediately. a hand comes from out of a wall and hands it to me. i give the hand 2.25 and leave. i swim to the lady and give her her sandwich.