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Non-dream stuff - Woke up at around 9:20 recalling one or two non-lucid dreams, sat up to make note of one of them and forgot the other.

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Dream:
I was in a town I don't recognise and it was night time. I was head to some place and then I ran into a stray dog, which looked like a mix between a dalmatian and a husky or something. But it was very scruffy and some fur was missing. Though I felt sorry for the dog I was initially wary that it may be aggressive or carrying fleas.

It got very close to me, rubbing against my legs but I kept moving on and it kept following me. I was going into some sort of garden/park and there were small trees but they made enough shade even at night that it felt considerably darker now. There were pairs of wild cats or something and they did look aggressive.

I was avoiding getting too close but the dog following me started growling and barking at them, I said "shh silly dog, stop that!"

The cats didn't react very much, but I was afraid they would but the dog stopped provoking them and continued following me.

Eventually at the other end of the park there was a brick wall, part of a building. In the wall there was a square doorway, literally a hole in the wall.

Inside was a small dark room and there was a mini shower for the dog and some dog shampoos and things. I turned on the shower or it came on by itself and the dog became a person. At that point I thought the dog shampoo might not be such a good idea anymore since it wasn't meant to be used on people.

Then there was some transition and it was implied I was on the other side of the building; it wasn't as dark now, it was starting to become day. There was a dirt path and a barn or something and a boy with a backpack.

I was here like the boy to do some sort of exam, but I remember I had some pills, 4 or 5 of them and oddly enough I put all of them in my mouth at the same time, and struggled a bit but managed to swallow them. They were all different colours, as I remember holding them and looking; white, light blue, magenta and something else.

Then I walked towards the barn and I remember walking up a couple of steps and entering. I think someone was there but my memory of the dream kind of ends here.

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Some notes:

• The dog was smaller than I would expect for either of the two breeds it seemed to be.
• The cats looked a bit like lynxes or bobcats or something, they were fairly big but not much bigger than the dog.
• The bit with the pills was particularly odd; I never carry pills around, but of course there's some contextual residue that I take supplements before bed sometimes. The fact that I took so many at the same time was odd too because it can be difficult to swallow just one large pill without a drink, let alone a few more at the same time.
• I remember the dog shampoo bottle looked a bit like a plant feed bottle; it was plastic, red body, green cap.

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Scoring thus far:
+ Previous score: 32.0

+ This DJ entry score (breakdown below): 2.0
++ Recall a non-lucid dream: 1.0
++ Help someone in need: 1.0 (the dog, I felt like I was helping my letting it follow me, as I didn't know what would happen otherwise and would feel guilty otherwise)

= Total score thus far: 34.0

Morning of June 12, 2017. Monday.



I become aware that I am lying on a snow-covered sidewalk, possibly in La Crosse (where I have not been in real life since February of 1994). I “remember” that I had been with a group of pirates. Presently, I and at least three others are probably in need of assistance. We all are going to be taking at least two headache tablets (even though I do not have a headache). They are all on the ground, near parts of the snow-covered sidewalk. I also see a lot of powder, the appearance of which reminds me of powdered drain cleaner. Within the mostly white powder are slightly larger red, blue, and green grains.

I take only two pills and, even though the others have probably taken four, decide to stop there. I also ingest just a small amount of the powder. Still, I wonder if I had taken too much. (I do not use any kind of drugs or medication in reality.) I feel an unusual blissful sensation as well as a slight vivifying of my dream.

Later, I decide to get up. The other pirates do not follow me at this time. I find my way onto a porch that seems loosely modeled after the King Street mansion’s front porch. I lie on the wooden floor for a short time.

Soon, the leader of the pirates opens the front door and steps out onto his porch to see me lying there on my back. Even though I am a part of his group, he seems annoyed to see me and is going to shoot me. He takes out a flintlock rifle and aims at me. I do not really feel like being shot but I do not attempt to escape or even move. Suddenly, another pirate appears behind him on the porch (having just come in from outside) and shoots him in the back of the neck. This other pirate is Charlie Pace (a “Lost” television series character played by Dominic Monaghan). I am grateful and thank him. The rest of the pirates that had been lying on the snow-covered sidewalk enter the porch from outside and look down at the body, seemingly unsure of who the new leader will be.

---

This is a typical porch dream of the type I have had all my life. Porches symbolize the waking transition of liminal space and often involve the personified preconscious (here, the pirate leader). The purpose of the preconscious is to initiate waking (or finalize the consciousness shift towards waking), sometimes by “killing” or annoying the fictional dream self (though sometimes linking “return flight” symbolism). Although it is rare to be “killed” in my dreams in a discernible manner, my emergent consciousness was projected as the pirate version of Charlie Pace (though sometimes my emergent consciousness is like an enemy as well depending on the type of waking symbolism that is rendered). (I have not seen an episode of “Lost” in a long time.) There was no direct hypnopompic surge (which probably would have happened had I been “shot”). It was a soft awakening. The very common dream sign of lying down having been “asleep” is present (and I am lying down in the last scene as well), which replaces the usual water induction (although technically snow is frozen water).

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Morning of April 28, 2017. Friday.



In the first part of my dream, I somehow lift one side of the mattress, which is near the wall, while I am still kneeling atop it. Under the bed are two rows of model cars of the type that were put together from a kit. The rows are nearest the wall. (Neither side of our bed is near a wall in reality.) This involves some sort of false memory that dreams create so often, and it is even like a sense of nostalgia. I pick one of them up, from about the middle of the second row out, and it seems to be somewhat like a dune buggy though somewhat angular all around. It is a bit longer than the length of my hand.

I later find myself with what turns out to be at least three jigsaw puzzles on top of each other. Originally, I try to keep them together as I am moving them, but they fall into pieces on the bed. They all seem to be some sort of manga “movies”, or rather, are linked to some sort of soundtrack that I hear in my mind by taking a couple white pills, which have somewhat of a sweet flavor and are associated with the puzzles. Because the puzzles are not together, the dialogue is in random parts. I am not clear on what the female voices are saying because of this. Again, the spoken words are only heard in the correct order when the puzzles are complete (although each puzzle is only one large picture).

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I find this unique even though it is straightforward. Being in bed in my dream is a subliminal awareness that I am actually sleeping (and obviously in bed) at the time. The Puzzled State is a recurring level of dream self existence during the waking transition. I was first aware of this metaphorical association from a dream from when I was only four years old. It is metaphorically linked to the temporary dream self suddenly relearning the conscious self identity, which is “in pieces” in the dream state prior to waking, thus an incomplete jigsaw puzzle symbolizes the transient nature of liminal space and puzzlement over shifting consciousness. The pills might be related to an association with “The Matrix” with finding out the dream state is not real (though this is only a wild guess, as I do not take pills or any type of medication in real life).

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Morning of October 17, 2016. Monday.



The time seems to be early afternoon in all the outdoor scenes. In the first scene I am in our residence but I am not sure where it is implied to be. Our youngest son Oliver has a large terrarium that extends from floor to ceiling though it looks like an aviary. It is directly in the corner of the left side of the room, about two and a half feet square. He seems cheerful. Zsuzsanna is concerned about him seeing the turtle he had brought home the day before. I look in and notice that the turtle seems propped against the back of the cage on the right. It is on its right side and a bite had seemingly been taken out of it, shell and all, probably by another animal in the cage. I am not sure what to do with it but Oliver does not notice.

My attention falls on weird animals in the cage. There are a few spiders with black disk-like bodies, the bodies of which are almost as big as my fist, though their legs are nearly three feet long. The legs are thin and closely paired so that it looks like they have four legs instead of eight. One seems positioned head down, its legs on two different large branches so that I mostly view it from the top of its body. I look to the right side and notice that the cage, at least on that side, is designed more like the front of a jail cell with the bars sparse enough for any of the animals to easily leave the cage. The side facing me does not seem of this appearance. I comment on how they could get out, but it does not bother me that much.

In the second scene, the personified preconscious appears as an unknown male of about my age and is presently sitting in another area of the room, though does not yet attain a more dominant presence. I watch three mole crickets crawling about on a pillow. Two are their natural color but the smallest of the three, in the middle, is pure white. I reflect on the idea of them possibly crawling on a person in their sleep, but there is not that much concern. A mole cricket is a tertiary dream sign that symbolizes going deeper into sleep in real-time, two of them symbolizing Zsuzsanna and I but the white one in the middle representing moon induction (circadian rhythms factor) and shared dreaming on the spiritual level as analogous to the Blue Pearl event (inviolable telepathy between soulmates, specifically twin flames as Zsuzsanna and I are).

The personified preconscious points to an unrealistically large detached crab spider head facing us from the right side of a pillow across the room on a bed perpendicular to the bed I had been looking at near the center of the room. “Something should be done about that head on the pillow,” he says. Despite this incredibly obvious dream sign of him directly exposing his role as the personified preconscious, my dream self remains completely clueless and no lucidity is triggered.

In the next scene, we end up in a small dimly lit room which has the essence of liminal space (even though I am not near waking yet). He sits on a wooden chair while I seem to sit cross-legged on the floor. I am facing him as he talks about money but he seems sarcastic about a certain business I do not know the name of (although he had apparently said it a few times but my dream self remains unaware of some of what he says). He seems to mimic advertisements and promotional gimmicks. “Make lots of money,” he says, mocking the original supposed speaker and waving his arms around seemingly in frustration. “Have you heard of Amway?” I ask him after watching and listening to his routine for several minutes. He glares at me as if I am unbelievably stupid and had not heard a word he had said, as Amway is apparently what he had been talking about all that time. I feel embarrassed but try to explain that I had heard him, though my pretense is not very convincing.

In the next scene I find myself near an intersection having apparently mowed our front lawn recently. My (fictional) house is on the street that is perpendicular from where I am standing near a bus stop. I contemplate how I have to mow this whole area, but after a short time, I realize that it is not my responsibility and the city council will do it at a later date. Despite being near the bus stop, I am not interested in (subliminally) shifting consciousness. However, five young people get off. They do not regard me at this time.

Despite my cursory faux memory and brief acknowledgement of my dream house (which seems vaguely based on the Loomis Street house though the rest of the area is not as such), I soon go into the backyard of our present house, though the gate is on the wrong side; at the north end of the fence near the southwest corner of our house instead of the south end near the northwest corner of our shed. A young unfamiliar black woman, who seems to be a teacher, is there with Zsuzsanna. Zsuzsanna has seemingly been given something that was stealthily taken from the personified preconscious. It seems conspiratorial. There are apparently two batches of mail-order pills. I take the two packages from Zsuzsanna’s left hand. One of them is a C4 manila envelope (yellow) padded with bubble-wrap and the other is a white C8 envelope with lesser bubble wrap. I open the larger package to find that it contains several cylindrical prescription bottles of pills of some kind. (None of us take prescription pills in real life.) There is also a receipt. I look at it and read it closely. “These pills cost eighty-six dollars a fortnight,” I say, seeing the total price listed as $86.00 under $79.95 and the shipping and handling fee of $6.05. “It's eighty-six.”

I fail to recall that eighty-six is the number implemented when the personified preconscious gives up on my non-lucid dream self (having “eighty-sixed me”), thus no coalescence, implicit or not, at the waking stage. This is validated by the fact it comes in the mail, which represents communication between dream self and whole conscious self identity.

The preconscious essence flows into the five children (and I do not focus on the fact that we have five children although these children are unfamiliar) who had gotten off the bus earlier and so naturally they approach our home to impose upon us to try to get me to either wake or become lucid. Zsuzsanna and I are sitting on chairs outside of our fence, our backs to it, our youngest daughter and youngest son sitting between us (which is not something we had ever actually done). A boy somehow throws a large mattress fairly high into the air above our heads (probably subliminally associated with our youngest son now sleeping on the top bunk of a bunk bed), but it misses us in coming down, landing immediately to Zsuzsanna’s right. I get the impression that he had been trying to throw the mattress over our fence (beyond liminal space and out of the immediate level of consciousness). I still do not grasp such an obvious dream sign. “Are you trying to kill someone…such as a baby?” I yell angrily at the boy.

The entire orientation soon changes without a clue on my part. We are now all in our backyard on our side of the fence yet the five children (who must have teleported with us) are now leaving through the gate, the boy somehow carrying the mattress again (which does not at all resolve logically from a conscious viewpoint since he is seemingly carrying it on his right side as he would a textbook). I am so angry that I decide to follow them. As soon as I step outside of the gate, my consciousness shifts into the waking stage and I realize I had been had.

Morning of June 22, 2015. Monday.





I am sitting on the floor in our present home on W Street while my wife is sleeping (though I think she is awake in reality). The living room is more open and seemingly larger. I have a compartmentalized plastic box with either ten or twelve wells which are probably of about one and a half to two inches square. For some reason, I have two types of pills (yellow and blue) arranged in no particular order in the box - that are about the size of the larger oblong vitamin tablets I have seen. I get the impression that one pill type is related to lucidity or doing something to the waking self to enter the dream state more effortlessly. I am not yet lucid at this point. The other pill type is possibly for a similar purpose, though I get the strong impression that it may not be a good idea to take either type. (I have never taken any kind of pill or “aid” to supposedly enhance dreams or aid in sleep - including the time I was woken up in the hospital in the 70s and was asked if I wanted sleeping pills…and yes, that really happened). I am not even sure if the pills belong to me - my older brother Dennis may have left them here (even though he lives in America and has never been to Australia). I place one yellow tablet in my mouth for a short time and bite on it a bit and then decide that I do not feel like taking one after all, though my tongue and the roof of my mouth are slightly powdery, the pill only partly crumbled but not fully broken into smaller pieces.

I get up to go to “sleep” (still in my dream) and I realize that I need to drink some water. When I take a sip from the glass, the water somehow causes the residual powder in my mouth to sizzle and send me into an extraordinary state of perception and in-dream clarity. As I decide to get up again, the palm of my hand flashes very brightly as if with an inner glow just under the skin and I reason that the pill was responsible for this chemical change in my body. This concerns me somewhat regarding my physical well-being, making me even more wary about having any pills around.



As I am then near the foot of the bed, I realize I am in a very vivid lucid dream, yet at the same time, am atypically puzzled about my real-self’s perspective. What happens to my real-self when my dream-self becomes fully conscious? I need to find out, so I zap back and wake up, which of course, was a bit pointless.

When I go into another dream later, it is lucid, but meandering - and I do not attempt to alter anything. I am just walking around in a shopping mall where there are lots of other (unknown) people of various clearer features (a typical scenario for this level of lucidity). Two females, one of whom looks like a thirtyish Jamie Lee Curtis, confidently save some people from being shot by another female with a machine gun. However, prior to that, the would-be shooter seems to keep changing her mind on whether or not to shoot a certain person in extremely brief cycles of mood and anticipation. The main rescued female says something about not saying anything about her rescue to the authorities - with the assumption that one of the rescuers is a vigilante also wanted by the authorities, but the one who looks like Jamie cheerfully asks her why not as they are walking off, implying that she should report her experience - even in describing her rescuers to the police.

Another senseless scene follows where I am with a group of about five or six unknown males and am “playfully” pointing an unloaded AK-47 at random people coming into the mall. No one notices or cares. The conversation in the group seems very important though I am not directly involved. I hear one male talking about being put on hold for ten minutes while ordering pizza in Indonesia. One male seems to become bored and starts doing an odd routine to see if anyone notices. He keeps lifting his legs behind him and over time, is actually almost diagonal (facing downwards and holding himself up with his hands) with his feet propped up on what looks somewhat like an old-fashioned post office desk. No one notices his antics. Eventually, he is in a squatting position on the top of the desk and still no one regards his location - which seems to amuse him. To his right (my left) is another male on the desktop that was not part of the group, who is also grinning.

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03.11.2013 2/2

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

Vi alguém sendo desfibrilado em uma maca. Visualizei como era ser desfibrilado (a experiência de morrer e ser ressuscitado era como dormir). Agora eu estava em Osasco, perto da casa do meu pai (Bem onde a feira de quinta começava perto da oficina) e via um médico conversar com um homem dizendo que ele possuía problemas cardíacos e que lhe daria um remédio. O homem perguntava "Pro problema cardíaco né?". O médico confirmava. Eu via uma cartela prateada com comprimidos vermelhos. Eu pegava um dos comprimidos compridos e me perguntava "Por que todos os comprimidos não podem ser assim? É mais fácil de engolir". Eu colocava-o na boca e tentava engolir. Não conseguia e começava a morder. Ele quebrava na boca como se fosse feito de fios de vidro. [No dia anterior eu fui tomar um comprimido pra dor de cabeça e o cortei no meio pra poder engolir menor, e me lembrei da primeira vez que minha mãe me deu um remédio pra dor de cabeça em que eu o mastiguei]

I'm inside a warehouse with Daz and Anna. I see a bag of flower underneath the garage door. The door starts to close, and I quickly try and get through the small opening or try and move the flower, but I get there too late. I can see a man with a grenade launcher. He shoots off a grenade and it explodes not too far from me. It looked pretty amazing seeing the explosion. I think I'm at a army base and try and have a sneak passed the guy that shot the grenade. I only get a small glimpse of what looked like an Army Tank.

I'm now in a room with Daz and he is holding his cock pills. I hug Daz for some reason and he hugs me back and kisses me on the cheek.

I'm with Anna and I feel horny and want to have sex with her, even though she has a boyfriend. I expect it to be OK, cause there's nothing to it, no emotion, just sex.

I'm laying in bed with Anna and Daz is behind us.

Standing behind the van talking to a girl about World of Warcraft. I keep rewinding the scene to fix things. I’m inside the van and realizing the back isn’t latched shut, Mom tells me what to do. I reach back carefully and press the small black latch in (like the ones to hang things on). Mom wasn’t concerned, she was going to leave it open.

Inside someone (Sarah’s?) house, something about a bag of half-cooked popcorn (the popcorn was inlaid into the bag) and another bag, I take it with me but worry about burning it since I don’t know how long it had already cooked for. It looks burnt already.

I ask for a pill and go to the bathroom. I take it, but there’s another pill left on my tongue, it’s half of a pink pill.

I think I’m being kept contained. I think something about Loki (The Avengers).

Notes: Really cool bit when I kept rewinding the scene, I think I remember thinking of it as ‘going back in time’, but in the dream or IWL?

This was yesterday, I guess. So I dreamed that I was back at my boarding school again and holiday is over, but then I somehow got lucid and realized everything is fading AGAIN. So I went downstairs from the dormitory and found "Anti-wakeup pills" and downed them all, but it didn't help much though since I forgot to stabilize. I woke up from my alarm clock.

Spoiler for Points I should improve:

I really, really need to remember to do reality checks to reassert my lucidity, and I need to remember to stabilize. God I always forget to stabilize.

1. Standing in the bathroom trying to identify all the plants. One of the plants was had maple leaves and black stems. Then my friend suddenly appeared there and asked me what I was doing and my sister fell out of the ceiling. I felt embarrassed about something and decided that if he asks about it later I'll tell him it was a dream. I didn't even think about if I was dreaming or not.

2. I was watching a dude walking across about 5-10 streets in a place that looks like an area that exists in waking life between Walmart and that guitar store owned by a crazy narcissistic drug dealer. In the dream I thought I was watching a movie, but I was right behind him. Cars randomly came out of nowhere and hit people. I somehow remembered seeing him get hit and thought I knew when it would happen, but he crossed every street safely. He walked in his house and I followed him, still thinking I was watching a movie. Then I suddenly became the dude, who was getting divorced and needed a new house. There was a guy in the house asking what kind of house I wanted. I said I wanted something exactly like it but it needed 28 rooms. He said he can't do that, it has to be either 5 or 30 rooms. Then I said that I wanted it to be completely different from this house, but exactly the same, which somehow made sense in the dream. I don't remember anything after that.

3. While walking though my house, I discovered a secret room. I walked in and saw a million bottles of talking pills. Most of them said they were for stomach ulcers, some were for heart problems. A few said they were for "severe cases of green goo"

Dream - Lucid

I was in what appeared to be a cave system, but it was supposed to be at the restaurant I recently quit. The manager was evil, and was turning all the employees into zombies. I refused to let that happen to me. As the zombie workers tried to attack me, one by one, I fought them off. I remember them having red, glowing eyes.

~

I was asleep on our neighbor's front porch, underneath my sleeping bag. It was nighttime. I rolled over, and the door opened. Lisa (the neighbor) checked on me, and then went back in. I rolled back over. I wondered how I was sleeping out there and not being freezing cold.

I then remember going inside, I guess it was time to get up. The sun was just starting to come up. Lisa came down the stairs. Something about the cat needing to go outside.

Then, I was sitting on the porch with Lisa and her husband, Steve. One of her sons, Kael, was there briefly as well. He walked up to us for a little bit. He was smiling and gently swaying from side to side.

An owl then flew by, and I held out an orange prescription bottle of assorted pills, one Lisa had put together, of some antibiotics and antidepressants. The antibiotics looked like some I took last year IWL for an upper-respiratory infection. They were large green and blue capsules. The owl landed and took a beakful of the pills, and flew away. Apparently, Lisa did this all the time, fed the animals pills. It was supposed to help them. I was worried, though, since the owl had taken so many. He took quite a few of the antibiotics, which I felt like we needed for some reason. No one else really seemed all that concerned.

Spoiler for Expicit content:

Then, it was just me and Steve. On the street, lots of prostitutes filed out of a car. I thought about their jobs for a second, how it must be hard for women to go to work, knowing strangers are just going to fuck them all night. There was a girl who Steve wanted. She told him to take her in the ass. He pulled back her panties and did just that, right there where the street met the front yard.

Then, we were back on the porch. He was smoking a cigarette, and was surrounded by the empty orange pill bottles. I picked one up, took out a pencil, and wrote "STFU" on the white label, and put it down next to him.
"What did you write?" Steve asked.
"Shut the fuck up," I said, and stormed away.

I came back a little later, and that particular bottle was gone. I assumed he got angry and threw it (IWL he has a pretty bad temper).

I was then at home, standing in my mom's office with my mom and my brother. They were on the other side of the room. I opened up the farthest left window and looked out. It was a grey, overcast morning. My brother then said
"It smells like smoke in here."
I then replied with
"I didn't smoke, Steve was smoking a cigarette," or something like that.
He then came back with
"No, not cigarette smoke, weed smoke."
I then turned all defensive and said
"I only had one hit! I'm not even that high!" though I don't remember smoking weed in the dream, unless it was sometime when I was on the porch with Lisa and Steve.

~

I was in a room with lots of people. A man who looked kinda like a guy I knew from my college Swing Dance Club, Alan, came up behind me and gently put his arms around me. I hugged his arms back. I was very comforted by his presence. I was very happy and content being around him, being held by him. At one point, he whispered "I love you" to me. I think he thought I was asleep. I'm pretty sure I said it back. "I love you, too."

I was then sitting on a hospital bed, in what looked like a hospital room. The walls, floors, and sheets were all white. Sitting on two chairs in the back of the room were my old boss from the restaurant in the first dream, and a big, tall black guy who looked kind of like a guy I went to school with when I was younger, and Kenan from the show Kenan & Kel. My old boss asked me
"So why were you in the hospital...?" She named off a few mental illnesses that could have put me in.
I said
"My depression got really bad." A vague statement.
She then said
"Oh I understand, my son deals with that sometimes," and she patted the guy next to her on the back.
I was then handed a form I had to sign. Something on it was highlighted in yellow. I also remembered I didn't have a doctor's note, but no one asked me for one.

As people walked by the room, I scanned for the guy from the beginning of the dream, but I couldn't find him.

I then was following one of the girls I used to work with down a long hallway. She explained to me that since I'd been gone, they had done some renovations, so everything was located in different places now. She then told me that I either need to stay or quit, and to not do what I did again.

As I was walking, I realized that I had no idea how or why I had come back here; I quit for a reason. But I kept on walking.

Then, I was heading to a huge auditorium with quite a few other people. I still couldn't find the guy. The leader of the group couldn't quite decide which way the auditorium was. There were two, actually, and we needed to be at a certain one. We finally decided on one of them, and walked in.

There were blue, auditorium-style seats in the audience and on the stage. The ones on the stage went up very high. We filed in the ones on the stage and sat. I was scanning the room for the guy that held me, wanting to find him again. I scanned in the rows of guys, who all appeared to be in tuxes, but I couldn't find him. I saw one that looked kind of like him with a blue baseball cap on, but it wasn't him. All I could remember about the guy who held me, besides what he looked like, was his last name being "Creech"; I had no idea what his first name was. I remembered this from seeing it written down somewhere.

We were all then watching the opera class rehearse for a show. We were watching from the audience seats now, as they performed in the stage seats. Their costumes were all farmer-ish; one girl looked kind of like she was supposed to be Little Bo Peep.

I then heard my old choir teacher from high school yell out that she needed to see me and Zach, a guy I was in band and choir with in high school. We got up and started to walk upwards (we were in the stage seats again). I then noticed Zach and I were wearing our old high school marching band uniforms, and everyone else was in my old college's marching band uniform. I felt silly, still being in my high school uniform. I guessed it was because we came in late, and had to wear some kind of uniform.

When we got to the top, my choir teacher talked only to me, and not Zach at all. She said, with a plastered-on smile, as is the norm for her IWL,
"Don't do what you did again. If you're going to quit, then quit. If you're going to stay, then stay. There are plenty of other people who would like to be up there."
Inside, I was very upset that she was saying these things to me. I have depression, and it got really, really bad, and that's why I left. She then asked,
"Can you do that for me?"
I said
"I...I don't know."
I was crying at this point.

I then walked away, planning on just removing my uniform and leaving, never to come back again, when I remembered I wanted to find that guy, "Creech", again. I turned around to go back. People were filing out of the auditorium, including the farmer-dressed opera members, who were talking about singing. I scanned the line for Creech, but couldn't find him.

I then ran into the girl that led me down the long hallway. She said if I was going to quit, to hang up my uniform. Sigh. I didn't even want to give them that.

I was then in the back, and there were some fat, ugly girls in full-length black choir dresses. They were apparently on the "sidelines" of the choir, so to speak; if I quit, one would get to sing. I remember one with curly hair and glasses talking about it. I took off my uniform (no longer the band uniform, though I'm not sure what uniform I was wearing), and was wearing clothing underneath. One of the girls took off some chunky light brown sandals, and asked where her "wide shoes" were. I put on the sandals she took off, first making sure they weren't the "wide" shoes; their size said something like 7/6 or 7/8, but no "W" to indicate that they were wide. They were kind of wide on my feet, but fit well otherwise. I knew that one of the girls was excited to sing; they seemed very happy, and were going on about it.

I was then walking back down the long hallway, free of my uniform. I felt lighter without it on. I looked down at the light brown sandals as I walked.

I was then behind the counter making a sandwich for a little girl. As she came up to me, I didn't say anything. She spouted off her order. I cut the bread pretty easily. This was what I had signed up to do, not run around and do some weird choir thing too; I was supposed to be making sandwiches! But I realized that I didn't want to be there either. I started putting some gloves on; they were small, and hard to get on my hands. I debated just walking out.

Oddly enough, I loved choir in high school, and would love to be in a choir now if I could.

The sandwich job though, I fucking hated it. Just for the record.

Black means non lucid
Orange means semi lucid
Blue means lucid
Red means dream characters talking
Purple means possible shared dreaming person
Green means notes


Got it? Great! Now enjoy reading my dreams.


Dream #1 Colorful Mood.


Me and Mila Kunis are outside, its night time and we are on a grassy field. We are looking at the stars and talking about astrology and signs. She mentions that she is a Leo sign, and i tell her im a Cancer sign. She says something like..

"You know im a fire sign right?"

"Yea i know. But my water can calm the wildest forest fires baby."

(She blushes)

We start kissing and she asks me if i had any pills. I reach in my pocket and pull out a vibrant pink pill for her, and i took a gold pill.



She is now glowing a vibrant pink colour, and i am glowing my a bright shimmering Gold colour. We start making out on the grassy field and i wake up.





Dream #2 Small Fry.

Im in a huge room talking with a bunch of mafioso guys about loyalty and respect. Im also mentioning that family must always stick together...no matter what. One guy gets up and starts clapping and tells me i should be a political speaker or something like that. I tell him that i only speak the facts, not fiction. They explain that its a little fella, who needs to be taught a lesson. I them let me take care of it for them.

Im now walking down a avenue, its evening time and there is this one little teenage kid who looks Italian. He asks me if i can handle something for him, and i tell him i don't have time right now. He explains to me that there is a man coming here in his neighborhood threating to kill his family unless he pays him or something like that. He tells me who his uncle is, and i remember that i work with him.

I tell him that i'll take care of that little problem for him. Im now in a apartment building in a room with classical music playing in the background. Loading up my guns and getting dressed up, i hear a knock on the door.


The guy waiting outside the door had a very calm attitude. But you can tell he also had a very in sane nature about him. He reminded me of the guy in the picture Ryuji Yamazaki from the King Of Fighters Video games. He asks me in a very calm tone...


"So...you ready to take this small fry out?"

"Oh im all for it."

We head out the door and now arrive at some warehouse where there are a bunch of men loading up a bunch of stuff in a box. Me and the Ryuji Yamazaki looking cat, started shooting at all the men. I noticed that one of the men was at the top of the stairs watching all of this. I went after him and started yelling at him telling him..

"You are only making it worst by running you know that right?"

My partner is downstairs laughing like a maniac killing off all of the guys down there. I finally find the man hiding in one of his rooms. He pulls out a gun a shoots at me but he misses. I start reaching in my pocket looking for something, and the guy comes out of nowhere and shoots me then i wake up. (Must've been searching for my totem probably lol)





6:24 - 6:40 am. Did plenty of reality checks with my totem. And went back to sleep.


Final dream: A moment of clarity.

Im in a supermarket and start telling myself..

"I am the dream navigator, i navigate thru peoples dreams. I always remember my dreams."

(Yet i did not become lucid)



Lol, anyway. Im walking thru the supermarket and i see a young lady who looks familiar? We talk for a bit, and i start mentioning to her about dreams. We talked for a good while, and she told me to email her later. Im now at home emailing her about dreams, yet i still did not become lucid!



Im now sitting down in my living room sipping my tea rubbing my hawk coin totem and reading the newspaper. I notice in one of the articles in big bold letters that said...

"CIRCUS CLOWN MASSACRED BY UNKNOWN SERIAL KILLER!"

My eyes light up, and i start laughing and read another section that says something about the urban legend Candyman may just be real. In it, it was talking about people who claimed to have seen him slaughter and wipe out the entire circus or something like that. I laugh as im reading this and start feeling like i may had something to do with this???




The dream fades, and i wake up.



Damn...i clearly could have became lucid in the 1st dream. (somewhat) The second dream i almost became lucid if it was'nt for that damn...


%*$%@#!


Lmao! But its all good. The last dream, i defintely should've hit full lucidity at that supermarket. DAMN! Lol, and while i was reading that newspaper, that defintely should've triggered some lucidity there for me! Ahhh, well can't get em all. Lol but i noticed my subconscious has a funny way of throwing certain things in my face when im not aware of it at times. Hmm..i don't mind what i got, besides..lucid dreams are just full control right? Being somewhat in control is not so bad depending on the theme that is. But overall im happy with my recall, and my results.

Black means non lucid
Orange means semi lucid
Blue means lucid
Red means dream characters talking
Purple means possible shared dreaming person
Green means notes


Got it? Great! Now enjoy reading my dreams.


Dream #1 Pills packed with power

Im in my 2nd home in my basement talking with some guys about dreams and taking certain things to enhance your recall and more dream control. One guy who reminded me of Justin Timberlake said..

"Shiiiit, hook us up with some of that shit then man!"

I shake my head and tell him..

"No can do. Besides, only a select few can take those pills. I have my own but its gonna cost you."

(Justin Timberlake looking guy talking)

"Alright, how much?"

"Your life."

Everybody is looking at eachother and laughing then the Justin Timberlake look alike says..

"So i have to die 1st in order to take the pills?"

"No. But seeing as how no one in this room, besides myself is even close enough to defeat her, you all are better off dead before i hand these over to you."

(A black guy talking)

"Shit defeat who?"

"Natalia."


Dream #2 Going shopping.

Im in a car with a woman who seems to be my wife. We head to a large mall and start looking around a bit. She asks me if i wanted to watch her try on some shoes. I told her sure why not. We head to a shoe store where she is trying on different heels and modeling them for me. I nod my head telling her which shoes look sexy on her gorgeous french pedi toes. We head to another area of the mall and glance at some wedding dresses. She tells me that her best friend is getting married in the next few days.

Her friend calls her on her celphone, and they talk a while. Im over at a man department store looking in this display glass at a nice suit that i would like. My wife asks me if i want that suit, i tell her yes! She laughs and says she will buy it for me. (All i remember from there)



6:40 - 6:50 am. Did plenty of subconscious training, and went back to sleep.


Final dream. Handing out beatdowns.



Im now in a neighborhood that i am not familier with. Some guys start trying to act hard in front of their ladies on the porch they talk smack, but i ignore them and continue walking. One guy actually tried tossing a plastic bottle in mt direction and said..

"Hey man, you know where you at?"

"No. I do not recall young man. Where am i?"

"This fool must be trippin."

His crew laughs and eggs him on even more yelling things to him like whup my ass or something like that. The guy starts walking closer and i reach in my pocket, and pull out a violet pill and swallow it.



My whole body is glowing a violet indigo colour, and the guy starts looking at me wondering why im glowing that colour. He starts to swing at me, but im moving super fast and just end up grabbing his arm and swinging him around and tossing him to a garbage can where a cat was cleaning himself. A few more of his guys get off the porch and decide they want a piece too. I start being ganged up by a bunch of em, (atleast 5 or 6 of them) and start moving super fast around each of them seeing there punches and evading all of there strikes to me. I run up to a guy like a blur and punch him in his face. Another guy tries to swing from behind, i duck and back punch him, i see a guy from the side of me stretch his arm towards me, and i crack it. one guy is running towards me and i spin and go behind him and crack his neck. A few of them are hurt, i just look around at all them shaking my head and i wake up.

Black means non lucid
Orange means semi lucid
Blue means lucid
Red means dream characters talking
Purple means possible shared dreaming person
Green means notes


Got it? Great! Now enjoy reading my dreams.


Notes: Wanted to see what my dreams would end up like without doing any reality checks, or subconscious training. Pretty interesting what my subconscious decided to give me.


Dream #1 Supermarket spree.

Im with my moms in a supermarket, and we are on some game show. We have 60 seconds to put as many items in the cart as possible. We run thru the aisle picking up items on throwing them in the cart. The timer stops and we have five hundred dollars worth of groceries in under a min! Me and my mom dance and laugh and start celebrating around the supermarket. (Very hilarious moment.)


Dream #2 A side of me that is shown often.








Im walking in a mall and hear Edith Piaf, La Vie En Rose in the background. (Must be my alarm) I stop and glance at this young woman who looked Arab or Indian. She is fairly attractive, Long black hair in a ponytail to her waist, big beautiful brown eyes, and a very light coco skin complexion. She wore blue jeans with silver flip flops, and her toes were polished a silver colour, and she wore a light blue shirt. She was putting clothes on a rack, and she turns to look at me smiling. I nod at her and smile back, as i continued walking thru the mall hearing that song play in the background. Pretty soon it fades, (Most likely went to a 5 min snooze) And i am now in line with a lady who looked tanned and in her 50's i believe. Very attractive, with medium length sandy brown hair, and big aqua blue eyes.

She begin flirting with me, and took out a green pill and swallowed it. I reached in my pocket and pulled out a green pill and swallowed mines as well. She begin glowing a aqua colour and and light begin surrounding her body. Another guy who was black was in the line hating and cock blocking, saying..
(Black guy talking)
"Why don't you get with a real man like myself baby."
(Woman talking)
"No thanks, im not interested."
She smiles gazing into my eyes, flexing her breast telling me she works out. We lock eyes for a while..then my alarm goes off again then i wake up.


Final dream: Fantasies from my subconscious.

Im in a room with two beautiful women who looked mixed with something.

Spoiler for For 18+:

Im sitting down in a chair, and one of the girls starts unfasting my belt buckle and pulling down my pants. She then takes her black leather heel pumps off, and throws them on the floor. She now lays on her back on the floor, and uses only her soft silky beautiful feet to tug and stroke my now fully rock hard erect cock. Another girl walks over and begins sucking on the head of my penis, while the other girl uses her feet to jack me off. A black dude walks in, and i look over at him and say..
"Man get the FUCK outta here!"
I throw a bottle of lotion at him, and tell him go in the bathroom and have fun...shit.

The girls laugh, and the guy takes the walk of shame. I continue my business with the women, and felt myself reaching climax and literally woke up with a bit of a surprise on myself. Lol,

I woke up recorded the dream and took a long hot shower.


Notes: Well not too upset with what i got. Can't complain, but this just shows what my dreams are like when i don't do any reality checks or subconscious training. Sooo think ima gonna go back to my usual routine. Lol, gonna start my day off with plenty of reality checks, and plenty of subconscious training for tonight.

Attempt & Extra Background Info
In order to get myself into the habit, im posting all dreams of mine, regardless of how pointless. I attempted another WILD for about the fourth time last night. I've been trying many multifarious techniques; this time I tried Reversed Blinking to get myself very relaxed, followed by deep breathing whilst counting down from 100 in between breaths. I made it to about 60 before I fell asleep into a non-memorable mini-dream(I get these very often when attempting to LD). Then I conted up from 1, made it to I think 17, and fell asleep. I awakened at 4A.M. for my WBTB technique, did a RC to make sure I wasn't in a false awakening and stayed up for about 20min browsing DV. After 20min I decided I was pretty awake, and didnt want to risk not falling back asleep, and attempted a WBTB-WILD. This time I tried to simply breath deeply, imagining a dream setting thoroughly involving all the senses, and tried to remain aware. Eventually I fell asleep and overslept according to my normal school waking time. De to me oversleeping, I didn't sit and try to recall my dream, because I was rushing. The collection of my dream randomly hit me before class started, and I was walking into the cafeteria.

The non-LD

This was a dull dream fragment, however I remember some details. There was alot of conversation that took place during the whole dream, and I can tell it was pretty normal. However, I didnt recall any deep details such as conversations. The earliest I can recall, is being a party with some of my ex-druggie friends.(I used to be pretty heavy in drugs, but I eventually dropped it like cold turkey due to my urge to be so sucessful academicly and overall.) Some im no longer friends with, and some I just dont talk to much anymore(my old "scene" druggie group). We were in a large house hosted by my ex-friend Josh(who had called me the previous day asking for one of his items) planned for a party. They all started popping pills and I left the situation, and found someone who disapproved of it like myself. I encountered a girl I never talk to, an underclassmen named Andrea. We pretty much ranted how we thought popping pills was so ignorant. Eventually I ended up running into another girl(upperclassmen that has posted on my FB wall I never speak to.) named Melissa. She was sitting on the floor at the edge of a bed, looking out a window. Outside there was like a parade, and I recall watching someone in a giant dinosaur costume. A human was controlling it, but the costume was probably about 5 feet taller than a bus. The dinosaur grabbed a bus acting ornery and people in the bus screamed. I spoke to Melissa a bit, and that's all I can remember.

I should be getting a galantamine supplement to make my dreams more vivid tomorrow. As for the LD, i'll still be attempting every night!