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Usually in my dreams I can breathe underwater as if it were air, and nothing ever seems strange about that. Well, this morning, after waking up around 4:15 AM, I fell back asleep around 4:30 AM and had a dream in which I was underwater, fighting (kicking) some sort of jellyfish with a horn on its head. But, at some point, I realized that it should be impossible to breathe underwater, and so I began to drown. I became completely paralyzed, numb, and limp, and slowly floated up toward the bright surface. Before I reached the top, though, all had faded to black, and I woke up, just ten minutes after I had fallen asleep, holding my breath.

The last time I remember having trouble breathing in my dream I woke up face down on my pillow.

Do you ever have trouble breathing in your dreams?

In this dream I was alternating names, sort of trying them on for size, like hats (I thought in hindsight, though sadly, no actual hats in this dream before waking up, which is a shame). They were mostly old family names, like my relatives maiden names, or names of close friends of the family.

This dream was all about self-identity, and I just know that part of why I dreamed it was because before going to sleep I tried to respond toa thread on dreamviews about changing gender in dreams. I say tried because I had server failed errors, so I do not know whether I actually did respond to that thread or not.

I also had some difficulty breathing in this dream, probably due to having a lot of congestion in real life, and hat raised the anxiety level in this dream.

Of course, given my struggles with myself lately and throughout life, anxiety about self-identity is not an unusual theme for me. Who am I? I am the one who is full of contradictions, and that's ok.

I think the fact that these were old family names is significant: I am aware that part of what makes me me is my family history, the women who came before me, who changed their names in marriage to redefine ourselves.

Old dream when I was probably about 10 years old.

Dreamed that I was up in the air and when I tried to walk I would rise just as if there were stairs under my feet. I tried to walk down but I kept going up, up, up. Eventually the air got thin and I was having trouble breathing. I woke up face down on my pillow.