tallbeauty

first of all i would like to say that before i fell asleep last night i was watching the youarecreators2 youtube channel. with that being said i'll continue on to my dream. it started out with me laying in my bed as normal in my normal looking bedroom in normal night time lighting, everything seemed normal as far as my surroundings. i was telling my subconscious mine (with my thoughts) "this is my mind and my life i control my mind nobody else!" while "trying to visualize my modeling dream" and every time i did this i felt an enormous amount of pressure in my head it was soo much to the point where i felt like i couldn't handle it anymore. i said it again "this is my mind!" then i started visualizing myself on the runway modeling with camera flashes pointed at me and again the pressure started again this time it was too much and again it felt like i couldn't handle it so i let go of control then it stopped, i never saw my subconscious or heard it speak. i just felt alot of pressure in my head i knew it was my subconscious mind's presence it felt like something was being forced in inside my head like energy and power it felt weird but it was to much for me. it's hard to explain it was not painful only alot of pressure. the dream seemed so real because like i said before my surroundings seemed normal. the only thing that trips me out was the sheet i was trying to hide under after i let go of control but before i went to sleep i had no sheet only my blanket. so thats how i know it was a dream and not real because the sheet in my dream was actually sitting on the futon in my waking life. most of the time i have no control over any of my dreams and just going with the flow. whatever is happening it just plays out. when i wake up from some dreams i question myself "why did i do that?" but in the dream it would seem like the natural thing to do..... so weird i've never had a dream where i actually controlled how everything played out. i have the most weirdest dreams some where i see black figures with red eyes, one time i had red eyes with blood coming out like tears and blood from my mouth, i've been abducted by aliens where they were trying to give me a shot and kill me in a dream once, i've dreamed where my entire family (people i claim as family and people who claim me as family, i don't know my biological family) exiled me, friends family, everyone who ever knew me or people i ever knew talked about me, it was big time betrayal. i've had dreams where i can't walk straight like my legs area giving out on me. dreams where aliens walk this planet, dreams where the sky is purple and turquoise, sex dreams with people i don't know, dreams i've been kidnapped held captive and bitten by a mysterious bug that made me sleepy, and the second worst of all was when i had a beerbelly a mustache and i was short o.0 that one was too much for me in real life i'm tall, skinny and i have no facial hair. and lately when i have a dream i have thoughts. like i'm actually talking in my head in my dream ive never done that ever until recently i'll say like for a month now. this is too weird .....i don't know what last night's dream was about with my subconscious mind but it was soo weird,