Vesterguard

non-dream - non-lucid - lucid

01/11/10 Mainly fragmented stuff have been on a week long break to see if I could reduce the amount of stress I had associated with dreaming (RCs, awareness checks and writing down). My recall seems to have improved slightly, but I have forced myself not to write things down, but here I am back again.

Was in a computer FPS like scenario, had a feeling I was in someone else's dream. Kept running over the same places looking for something, the key to get further with no success. I was climbing stuff.

Same scenery but I am supposed to be there, being followed by two teenagers, Jacob Bausager seems afraid of them, he borrows the plane and crashes it, it is my parents I go ballistic, I trusted him with it.

different people setting up various outlets to make money, Martin is one of them, I have one of his beers and help him out a bit. His mum comes and tells me I have always understood him, I don't understand this as I was horrible to him in school, we talk about his legs. Martin explains how I used to hit them, back in school when they were at their worst.

Drinking blood of a woman, she has betrayed me and I shouldn't have come out on top, but her blood gives me strength, when she is almost completely dry I get a narcotic rush and tell her “Now I know why they drain them completely” She replies that I haven't come close yet. I feel euphoric I feel like having sex with this woman, but I am not going to do it with her dead. I start pouring blood into the hole I have been sucking from, she asks what I am doing and I reply that I don't want to kill her. She sounds hopeful, but tells me that I will need to hypnotise her. I tell her I don't know how to do that and she explains that I will need to talk to Thomas (White Court Vamp, Dresden Files) about that.

OK a note here: During my time in Thailand I got attacked by vampires, they laid off the attacks as I stroke a bargain with the family patron vamp. I was suspicious then as to what was involved in the deal, but nothing so far has come up. This is my first vamp related dream since then and the only one ever with me on the sucking side. Although I try to be a good guy I must admit I am fairly interested in seeing if this is somewhat part of the same overall plot. IWL as per me writing this down I can't help but think “Is this it, am I turning now?”

(This next section I think I was more awake than in a dream, but I will write it down anyhows)

I am in the other guys dream as mentioned before, fairly positive I have just been awake. I am practising expectations behind doors, as a way of changing scenery (I am horrendous at dream control involving change of location). So the entire exercise for me here is to successfully explore a dream while lucid (A flowing change of scenery where I don't get caught up in my poor conscious imaginative skills to interfere). I keep thinking to myself “Damn this doesn't count, I can't even get into first person, so really I am just visualising all of this and not dreaming at all. Damn that means I will wake up shortly as well” (A pretty non-productive way of thinking!) It only lasts about 30 seconds to a minute.