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    false awakening

    False Awakening

    1. Trippy Mutil FAs

      by , 02-19-2019 at 03:13 AM (Xanous' Dream Journal)
      #524

      I don't quite recall this perfectly nor am I sure what triggered lucidity but I'll try to put the pieces together.

      I think how it started is with me noticing something about a FA making me wonder if I was dreaming. I do my fave RC, the nose plug, and announce that I am dreaming. Something about saying that and it being true filled me with that old feeling of amazement and wonder. Every time I say this throughout the rest of the dream I am filled with the same feeling.

      I don't do much because I keep falling back into FA but somehow I keep catching on to it. I don't know how many time I work up to realize it was a dream but I feel like it happened a lot. Maybe that's a false feeling but it seems true.

      I remember that at some point I watch a dream materialize from darkness. I rub my hands together and examine them for stability. I look around at several people staring at me. It looks like I am in a classroom. I tell them all that I am dream. All of this is a dream. You are in a dream. Some look at me with blank expressions some of them look at me like I am crazy. I tell them I will prove it by putting my finger through my hand. It almost works but doesn't quite get there. I try to think of it as reaching through empty space. I doesn't quite work to my satisfaction. I tell them maybe this is a bad example.

      I recall another time of trying to phase through a glass or mirror.

      At one point I clap my hands for stability and am momentarily fooled by an FA. I realize I have been moaning (perhaps not I don't know. I have recorded myself on my sleep app moaning so who knows lol). I think I must have woke my wife. She tells me I was clapping and talking in my sleep. Then I think nope this is typical FA stuff. I never act out my dreams. I relax and see a kaleidoscope of psychedelic geometry and color. I enjoy this for as long as it lasts. I don't know how long. Maybe I lost lucidity for a moment. Maybe not.

      I now I am walking someplace. I explore my surroundings. I don't quite recall what it was. I continue to tell people I am dreaming but they don't respond. I don't really care. There was more but I forget.


      I finally wake up for real ( I think) and I feel uncomfortable so I roll to my side. I am confinement I'll renter the dream state lucidly but unfortunately I don't recall anything after that.
    2. Snoring to Soaring

      by , 06-10-2018 at 04:48 AM (Xanous' Dream Journal)
      #522 - OBE - 12:20

      Sometimes I really feel like I have some sort of sleep disorder. I fall asleep for about 1 hour and then find myself staring at some strange red light. I think I am dreaming at first but quickly realize I am looking at the alarm clock half sitting up. It's super weird but I shake it off and try to go back to sleep. Sadly for me, my wife is intermittently snoring and begins to drive me crazy. I keep nudging her to get her to stop long enough for me to fall back to sleep but it's not working out.

      Some time passes; not much, hell, I didn't know any time passed until I hear the snoring again. I nudge her but this time when my hand touches her it feels really numb and soft. I almost immediately recognize this as the dream state so I test it. For reason I think slap her leg and pinching her would be the best way to check. Luckily, I was in deed in a SP/dream state and not waking life. Not that I have confirmed this, I am briefly annoyed that I still hear her snoring and I'm unable to try to stop her. Once, I decide it's best to focus on getting out of body, the snoring stops.

      There is a little resistance but I manage to exit. I float out of the bedroom and see a white mass of something in the living room. I think it's something ghostly at first but once I decide it must be my dog she takes shape. She gives a soft bark and uncharacteristically nips at my feet. I decide to just bring her along with me. I take her by the collar and walk her to the other side of the house. All the while she is annoyingly nipping at my legs and feet. I find that confusing but just ignore it. Once I open the back door, I let her lose. She runs off and it feels good because she is always trying to go running outside but we can't let her do that in waking life.

      I turn and run toward our field outback. There is a vivid green treeline in the distance with super bright blue cloudless sky. I say, "Oh wow!". It's just so beautiful and amazing thats is a dream. I run faster and stretch out my arms. I effortlessly soar into the sky. I feel the wind blow around me and I hear the rush of speed in my ears. I lose visual at that point but I don't care. I just close my eyes and soar with the air currents taking me where it wants. I feel so light and free and at peace. I dip down and back up and do lazy barrel rolls. My vision is in and out but I just focus on the feeling more than anything. At some point I dip down into the ground and flow through it like its water. I can actually see layers of rock and dirt and then I come back up like a fish jumping out of the water.

      Suddenly I feel as if I have opened my physical eyes. I am back in bed. I am not sure if I have woken up. I am overwhelmed with good emotions at what just happened that I wipe my face with my hands. I see my fingers form a geometric pattern from 4 or 5 sets of hands. Yeah, I'm still dreaming. I move my hands back down but it just looks like my normal dark room. The geometric finger patterns were cool so I try it again. My subC does not disappoint. I enjoy the trippy show as I feel a surge of energy pulse through my body. I notice it is in sync with a spinning kaleidescope of geometric finger shapes. I think I must be having a DMT release. It's awesome.


      After a few moments I lose my focus and have a FA. I am trying to clear my throat and it turns into loudly coughing up a lugie. My wife sets up and looks at me super annoyed. I think that she has nothing to be upset about after all that snoring.
    3. Zombear

      by , 06-16-2017 at 04:41 AM (Xanous' Dream Journal)
      #510ĖDILD-1:30AM

      There is a large brown bear that was sort of a pet but itís now becoming too aggressive. It wants in the house but I wont let it. I see itís face pressed against the kitchen window then pawing at the back door. Itís going to destroy my house so I decide itís time to get the hunting rifle. I load strange looking bullets into the gun. I note the bullets look awfully odd but assume it will work. I go out back and see the bear in out field. My kids appear and I tell them Alysha will just have to understand that I have no choice. I aim and the scope looks all weird but I fire anyway. Iím surprised the sound was so quiet. Looks like a miss so I try again. This time the gun fires 5 or 6 shoots at an incredible rate. The recoil throws my off balance. I look in the scope again and the bear is cut into a bloody mess.

      I noticed there were some wolves with the bear earlier so I figure I need to see why. I go around front and find a pelt of some animal under the front deck and decide that must be attracting them. I drag the pelt to the road and toss it across into the ditch. I am walking back to the house and spot the bloody bear in the back. I think I should dispose of the carcass as well. That's when I see it get up and start charging at me. I think werebear though its more of a zombie bear. It seems bigger now with massive tusk like teeth. It's charging fast on its hind legs. I am terrified looking for a way out. This is were I suddenly become lucid.

      I smile and tell the bear to bring it on while I stand there waiting. When it is close enough I punch it straight in the chest and send it flying high into the sky.

      I look down and see the bear charging at me again. It looks more humanoid this time and just as monstrous. I smile and stand my ground. Again I send it flying only to meet another. The next one looks more like a mass of blue plastic that mildly resembles the beast from before. I am still not worried. I put a shoulder down and charge back at it giving it a massive shoulder check sending the beast again high into the sky. I watch it get smaller and smaller. Then it stops, hovers and forms into a ball. I force push it to send it on a little more. There is something like streaks of blue magic like when a Jedi would use force push. I say, "Now your are a balloon." The beast ball calmly floats higher and higher until I can no longer see it. The beast does not return.

      I shout, "Whooo Hooo! Yeah! I love this!" I am happy about my victory but also very excited to be in a lucid dream. I start toward my house to find something else to do, but the dream feels finished and I wake up.


      I try to recall the dream but quickly find myself in FA. Canis Lucidus is doing dishes, scrubbing one of my pots. Some how the scrubbing action is tickling me and in the FA I wake up laughing because of this. This scene quickly fades and I wake for real.
    4. Coworker Embarrassment

      by , 02-22-2015 at 10:47 PM (Xanous' Dream Journal)
      #414 - 8:44AM - DILD

      WBTB 3:30AM 8mg Galantamine/400mg choline, 400mg DMAE
      This one didn't go so well, but I was lucky enough to pull off one LD late in the morning purely out of desperation.


      I am trying to enter my email login on my phone to see an important email from my mortgage broker. Nothing I type comes out right so I look for my laptop. I have an false awaking and become slightly lucid. I think how typical the previous dream was for electronics failure.
      Next I notice SW from work in bed with us. I know it's not real, but I am snuggled against him and I find it mildly humorous. I push him away and initiate sex with my wife by actively summoning and creating the sensation. Several odd thoughts race through my mind as we do it for a few moments.

      I am now in a classroom in a chair with a trash can between my feet.
      Spoiler for EXPLICIT:
      Shocked at my nakedness and sexual nature, I wonder how my dream would cause me to literally end up like this. I look up and see an and old woman that is an ex-coworker (dead) looking at me sort of curious as well as shocked. I quickly pull my shirt down to cover myself. I feel disoriented and confused. I wonder how I could have had such an obvious sex dream in public. I realize that I am in a room pf coworkers both past and present and if feel embarrassed and devastated that this is happening. I'll never live it down. My life is ruined. I pull my shorts up not really getting my underwear and they king bunch down low, but I don't care as long as I am covered. I feel so sleepy and I rub my face and sigh heavy trying to get my bearings. I still can't believe this has happened. I don't even know how I fell asleep. I try to ignore everyone around me as I deal with this trauma; I just want a way out. I begin to hope that by some miracle of divine magic that I am in a dream. Maybe... I do a nose plug out of desperation and am completely delighted and surprised to blow through. I giggle and the feeling of hopeless despair rolls off me dropping like a lead weight. Forgetting about any nakedness, I stand up and walk over to a group of people talking. I think how I am highly lucid as I playfully push V (fired IWL) over and say I relief, "This is all a dream." V falls out of sight and I smile at everyone feeling triumphant and gleeful. Before I can do much else, the dream quickly collapses and I wake up.

      I had another LD much earlier in the night but I cant recall much so I'm counting. Basically, I was running from some enemy when I became lucid and played with a gun. I wanted a shoot out so I blind summoned a rifle. I goes off against a glass but only scorching it. In some burned out building someones head peaked up outside a window. I fire off a shot, but the dream fades out.
    5. The Biggest Tool

      by , 02-11-2015 at 01:43 PM (Xanous' Dream Journal)
      #410 - DEILD - 4:08AM

      WBTB @ 3AM. Caffeine from coffee.

      I wake slightly surprised that I can recall no dreams. I lay still and focus my attention a few inches from the crown of my head. Vibrations quickly start and it's not long until I feel my dream body float up from my physical body. There is a moment where I can feel both simultaneously and this causes an in-and-out-feel or 'bouncing' effect of my dream body. I shift my focus to walking and make my way to the living room. I am blind, but I feel like I just have my eyes close so I slowly and cautiously open them, worried that I will open my physical eyes and wake up. Luckily, this clears up the dream with no other effect. As I walk to the front door, I have a strange feeling like I am half crouched or hunched over and my eyes feel like they are trying to roll into the back of my head. I correct this by straightening up and trying to look more downward.

      Outside, I see a full moon and the yard is only lit by it's dim light. There's are a few scattered stars and I recall one of my goals to meditate on one with the intention of travel. As I look up my eyes go out of focus and the feeling of them rolling into the back of my head returns. Then, there is some visual distortion like my physical eyes have opened slightly. I make a poor attempt to correct this not really knowing how and I wake slightly again.

      I DEILD the same way as before, but this time when I reach the living room I enter a true void. Usually I have some phsycial sensation during these 'void' experiences, but this time I feel truely cut off from everything; no sight, no sound, no touch. I don't even feel like I have a body. Instead of fighting against it, I decide to relax and enjoy whatever I am given. I then regain some sensational and feel as if I am slowly floating around a space. I then begin to roll and I see a light on each rotation through closed eye lids. I had no sense of time and wondered if there was light coming from my bedroom window. Maybe it's later in the morning. I begin to wonder if I am going to roll on top of my wife. I think about this and decide to have dream sex with her. I kiss her, but the feeling quickly slips away.


      I am fooled momentarily by a false awakening. I open my eyes and find that I have in fact rolled on top of my wife except I have my butt in her face. I feel embarrassed and we both laugh. I quickly get back on my side of the bed and try to focus again to DEILD. I have a vivid image of my wife laughing, but her teeth look very brown and decayed like some meth-head's.



      I am repulsed by this, but quickly realize this is a dream. I say to myself, "You are still asleep!" I know this is true, but I feel as if I still need to continue with the DEILD. The same as before happens, but this time I enter into a vivid dream (I was already there).

      There is a mirror on covering one whole wall in the bedroom and I hear a song from an acoustic guitar. The music sound generic and unoriginal yet familiar. My reflection has a giant wrench in his hands and is singing into it while bobbing up and down.

      Like this guy.



      I feel disconnected from it for a second, but quickly we merge as I sing. I have that awkward moment where I am not sure if I am singing in my sleep or not, but I do my best to ignore it. The lyrics just come to me without much thought, "I've got some issues. Yeah some issues. I've got some issues. Yes I do." Then I use the wrench to play guitar with then into my crotch as I use it to do some pelvic thrusts. I turn to the mirror on my wife's closet door and dance a little in front of that. I go out of the room and the song changes, "I'm gonna make great love...great love...yeah great great love. I've got some issues yeah some issues but I'm gonna make great great great love." I recall another goal that involves a dub-step song to try to induce a Star Wars battle. I sing loudly, "Destroy them with lasers!" Unfortunately, the music doesn't change. I say out loud, "Oh ok. I guess we're gonna keep going with this then." I start to sing some more, but the dream quickly fades and I wake up.


      Updated 02-11-2015 at 04:20 PM by 5967

      Categories
      lucid , false awakening
    6. Star Wars Droid Smash

      by , 12-16-2014 at 03:28 AM (Xanous' Dream Journal)
      #389 - DILD - 11:39PM


      Bedtime: 9:30-10:00PM

      I was surprised by an early night lucid last night. I don't have much for the entry because I nearly forgot it. I did my best to recall upon awaking but I was so tired that I quickly fell back into a non lucid dream before I could make and entry.

      I should note that I was trying to get lucid prebed. I simply fell asleep being totally aware of all body sensations similar to an SSILD short cut.


      I find myself lucid talking with some woman. I am having a hard time understanding and retaining what she is saying but I feel like the information is important. I tell her that I can't understand her and the word appear in a font on a wall from something like and overhead projector. I start reading but my words sound like gibberish and I quickly realize the words are just random letters or something like a foreign language. I shout about how nothing is making any sense.

      I have an FA and tell Rex about a lucid dream that involved the three stooges. For some reason I have trouble pronouncing 'stooges'.

      I am in a field hiding behind a log having a bow and arrow shootout. I am loosing and shout at a woman to help. I call her by my wife's name. I know this is the wrong name but I just go with it. I look over the log and see a guy running up on my. I shoot him with an arrow but there is no tip and it looks bent a broken. I only hope the close range does some damage. As I release the arrow I shout, "Die mother fucker!"

      2:00AM
      Since my LD was so weak, I decide to go ahead and do my WBTB. After a period abstinence the day before, I have 1/2 a bottle frappuccino (about 6-7oz.) at WBTB. I was really tired and didn't stay up longer than a few minutes of trying to rouse myself in the kitchen. I feel asleep once again focused on body sensations and repeating goals as a mantra. I didn't get lucid but I had some very vivid and cool dreams.

      2:48AM

      I am extremely late for work at my parents old house. I try to put a lunch together. I look in the fridge but nothing looks good or right.

      4:03AM (Star Wars KOTOR style)

      I am walking through a starship with some battle companions. There are large orbital droids with blue force fields attacking us. I fight back with a red light saber and force push powers. The lightsaber hilt resembles a blue baseball bat handle. I find it looks odd but feels very nice in my hand and gives me great maneuverability. I make a lot fancy movements putting my weapon into a blur of red as I spin and slash through my enemies. My force push shows some light faint blue energy from my hands as the droids smash into walls and shatter. At one point I lose focus and miss a droid with my lightsaber. I think to throw my lightsaber but fear it wont return. The droid glides over my head and behind me. I try force pushing behind my back but it misses. I do a backwards thrust with my lightsaber and cut the droid in half without looking. At one point I assist my friend with a blue lightsaber by trusting my lightsaber to the hilt into a larger droid. I watch as the metal turns molten.

      I am now separated from my companions but I think I see the one with the blue lightsaber enter something like steel elevator doors. I follow and cautiously peer into a small corridor with gold shimmering beams of light along the walls. I can sense danger and I decide to pause. As I step back I see a new type of ominous looking droid materialize before me. I dodge a red streak of blaster fire as the doors close. I consider reentering to attack but my lightsaber is now acting crazy. There seems to be some red light poking out of the butt of the bat handle and the lightsaber and I am able to use my finger to push it back in. It doesn't hurt me and when I look back at the other end, I see that the beam of hot red death is now a harmless balloon. As I run away from battle I notice that I can hear air hissing into the balloon causing it to enlarge into an irregular shape. I try to hold back the air but the balloon continues to grow. I panic that I will be without a weapon and pat my side for a blaster. Then I remember that I can use the force and I drop the now useless lightsaber with new confidence.

      I come to the end of a metallic corridor and find a large air duct. I recall that this was the way I sneaked in but I sort of feel that I am just making this all up now. I find the space is much smaller than I thought and as I try to squeeze in, I become super claustrophobic. I look for another way out and see Darleen from work exiting the corridor through a side door. I follow after her and wake up.

      5:19AM (Snooze alarm)

      I am at work and see there isn't much to do. I ask Darleen what the deal was and she said there was a problem in Engineering. She tells me that when is all resolved she will be "dancing with joy."
      I jokingly ask, "Who is this Joy person?" Everyone laughs.

      Updated 12-16-2014 at 03:31 AM by 5967

      Categories
      memorable , lucid , non-lucid , false awakening
    7. Car Flight GTA Style

      by , 11-09-2014 at 09:49 PM (Xanous' Dream Journal)
      #379 - DILD - 5:37AM (2 of 2)

      I am looking in the back seat of the car for something and can't find it. I look up and see the car is rolling forward. I remember that I was in bed just a moment ago and know it's a dream. I recall my conversation with Wurlman during the podcast about having fun with cars so I go for it. I have other goals but I decide to go ahead and hop in the driver seat. The car has rolled off the street it was parked on and heading toward a wooden fence. I gun it and ram through. The feeling of invincibly surges through me. I am surprised by a second chain-link fence and crash through that one as well. It has a nice sound effect.

      I come onto a four-lane highway going through a residential area. I follow the road going faster and faster. The car becomes slightly hard to handle during turns and I clip the side of a house. I don't care; this is all really fun. After a bit, I notice my view pulls back into a 3rd person perspective. I see a downtown area like on GTA5 and the dream looks very much like a video game. I notice I am not in my car anymore but some light blue SUV. I make the car go as faster (as I can imagine in this scenario) as I hit a sharp hill. It was only natural to take to the air at this point. I make the car fly up around the sky scrapers and I do a sharp turn to look around. I enjoy the view of the city, but then, I lose control and the car takes a fast dive into a busy street. There is some fiery explosions but it is mostly obscured by a large, thick cloud of opaque, black smoke.


      Suddenly, my younger daughter opens the bedroom door whining about something. I assume she's had a bad dream. My wife asks her whats wrong and my daughter replies, "The ants are living with the five."
      I lift my head up and say, "What?" I assume she's either had a bizarre dream and is still out of it or this is typical DC nonsense.
      I become semi-lucid but I feel very confused about where I am and who's bed I am in. For some reason I think I am a child again sleeping next to my mom as my dad works the night-shift. Slowly, I make sense of everything and try to make a DJ entry. However, as I fumble around the feeling of heavy SP, I remember this isn't going to work in a dream. I notice now that my arms and head are vibrating, though I feel like I am awake and moving around. I am not really sure if this is even possible, so I relax and lay still, preparing for an OBE type exit. I spend a few seconds here and I begin to go deeper, but it's at this point that my wife sighs loudly, rolls over, and shakes me awake.
    8. Manatee Costume

      by , 10-12-2014 at 10:42 PM (Xanous' Dream Journal)
      #370 - DILD - 5:53AM

      I am in some church that looks a lot like the last one my father preached at in Texas. I am standing in the back leaning on the back rest of a pew while someone drones on up front. I come to awareness as I am staring off into space being introspective. I decide this is probably a dream and wonder into a back room.

      I remember the costume task for the task of the month and look for my manatee outfit. There is a white toy chest behind a stack of chairs. There seems to be a bunch of stuffed animals and puppets in there. This is perfect for what I need. I reach in and pull out a grey hoodie with a plush manatee head for the hood. I decided before hand that I didn't want a complicated costume but this unexpected item is genius. I find a full length door mirror so that I would have a visual ground as I slip the costume over my head. My reflection doesn't cooperate and is making funny faces at me. It's not even doing the same movements I am. I decide this DC is annoying and move to another mirror. My reflection is still making faces but at least it's cooperating. I carefully slip the hoodie on while I keep a visual on the mirror. Once I have it one with the hood up, I turn around and imagine being in the water.

      The hallway behind me quickly fills with water to the roof and I start swimming. Air bubbles swirl around me as I level out and make swimming motions. The dream fades here a bit but I focus on memories of snorkeling and quickly find myself in something similar to King's Bay. I even act the part and pretend that I have fins for elbows as I 'walk' the bottom among the vegetation. after a few seconds, my vision fades to black again but I decide that I have done the task so I let myself wake up.

      I go ahead and nose plug but blow through. I set up and find myself outside next to my wife. I have the Manatee hoodie in my hands. I say to my wife, "Look, it's a Manatee hoodie! I just made it up on the fly but you would really love to have this. I wonder if it exists." My wife doesn't say anything but just smiles. I decide that I should do a web search when I wake up. This thought sends me into another FA.

      I nose plug and am upset that I can't wake up. I am really worried that I will forget doing the task. I try really hard to wake up but just have some SP feelings instead. I quickly recall the costume dream and feel I have a good memory of it so I go ahead and allow myself to have some more lucid dream time. I sit up and feel slightly bored not knowing what to do next. I see my wife lying next to me and get some ideas. I'll skip the details, but I enjoy some rough anal sex with her stopping just before I reach completion not wanting to have a wet dream.

      I have another FA and I nose plug. What the hell? I see my wife fully clothed looking into the mirror on the closet door. I am not at satisfied from before so I enjoy some oral sex. I feel that I am being ridiculously rough with her but decide that it's ok in a dream. I have an intensely satisfying release at the end and feel that I have now had a wet dream. Annoyed, I decide should wake up and change.

      I have another FA and nose plug. I shout out, "Goddammit mother fucker!" my voice is vivid and loud. I spend a few seconds trying really hard to wake up, but I just can't. I decide to let go the worry of forgetting the dream and needing to change and decide to be thankful for such a strong LD. I open my dream eyes to look around and instead of a ceiling, I see a vivid, clear deep space view of a bright blue planet nestled next to a golden nebula. I am in awe of this sight and spend a few seconds taking it all in. I want to fly to the planet and explore so I reach my arms up to it as I lay in bed. I try to fly up to it but can't seem to move or float up. I don't want to try to stand up or do much of anything because I don't want to ruin such a beautiful sight. Fixated on the view, I relax hoping to float up but I have another FA.

      This time I can hear the box fan humming and I try to move to get up. The effort jerks my physical body and I wake up for real.


      10:25AM - Non Lucid - CanisLucidus At The Event

      My wife and I are with CanisLucidus and his wife in a limo. CL is talking to his wife about getting tickets to some Glenn Beck event. His wife told him not to worry about it because she order early and got an awesome deal on some first class seating and there were going to meet Glenn Beck. I am a little disappointed that we didn't think of this. We had to order cheap tickets last minute.

      We separate and I am with my wife in a crowded street like it's New Year's Eve in Times Square. There seems to be a million people here. I am talking to my wife about random stuff and I tell here that all it will take is just one person to turn into a zombie and then everyone will quickly be infected and wiped out. I somehow know this is really about to happen so I keep a watchful eye on the people around me. My wife seems to think I am nuts but I am ready to fight the zombie hoard.

      Now I am watching CL with his wife like it's a movie. CL is narrating and I feel like I am reading one of his DJ entries. I see everything as from CL's point of view. He is next to his wife. She is in a fancy evening gown and CL is wearing a gray suit. They are high up in some balcony like in an Opera House. There is some conversation. I say to myself that I like how this is playing out like a movie with a plot. It's also skipping back and forth between characters like a movie. Seeing from CL's eyes, I look down at the jewel encrusted wine glass in his hand as he takes a sip. It looks like a moscato or some other white wine. There is some fine cursive lettering etched on the base of the glass. Now I am not looking from CL's eyes, but like I am there. I take the glass from CL and look closer. It is part of CL's DJ entry. It's hard to read and I don't remember it all but it says something about how he likes how he knows were are the DC's are in this part of the dream. This is just before 'it' all happens. He uses actual names rather than DV nicknames, but he tells where He and his wife are, where my wife and I are, as well as Dreamer and OpheliaBlue. There is something about how he's disappointed that I had to join the crowd down below but I had volunteered to help out with the event. I thought this was totally wrong and I begin to wonder what's going on. I try to read more of the small print to get some understanding but can't seem to see what the words are anymore. I am suddenly woken up by my wife getting out of bed.
    9. The Wine Bottle

      by , 02-10-2014 at 12:46 AM (Xanous' Dream Journal)
      Well I don't feel I should add the near WILD and DILD to my count Screw it. A lucid is a lucid. Even if I'm not happy with my LDs, I had an CRAZY wonderful morning of dreaming.

      Prebed: moderate amount of beer
      WBTB: Galantamine 8mg, Choline 400mg, Alpha GPC - 200mg


      4:37AM - My Assassination

      I am a woman in a red dress and I feel as if I am beautiful and sexy. I need to leave my house but there are people trying to kill me. I have a team of body guards around my house with guns. It's time to leave but we know there is a sniper someplace in the hills. My house is open with lots of glass but there is an exterior wall that I'm going to use as cover. When I go out I catch a glimpse of the sniper. He sees me and I duck behind the wall. A bullet chips off some of the top brick. I run for it from the end of the wall to a tree and bushes. I hear gun fire and dive for cover. Somehow I take a bullet to my lower back on the left side. The pain is horrible! (This is the worst dream pain I have ever felt. Or at least I perceived it that way.) I lie face down in agony and rage. I repeatedly shout, "KILL THE SON OF A BITCH!" As I lie there with my eyes closed, I think, This is how I die. And I accept that. There are some more random thoughts and images as I wake up.

      5:52AM - WILD - Vibes

      I wake from a dream I do not recall. A failed WILD attempt. I go back into WILD mode and get vibrations. I spend a lot of time floating and turning with strong vibrations but I can't seem to do much with it. I become bored and annoyed so I try something different. I wait in the void and relax my mind focusing on meditative awareness. Soon the vibes stop and I wake up. I try to WILD again but fail.

      The Metallic Werewolf War

      A non lucid dream forms. My wife and put my son in something like his high chair. I look up and we are in some class room. There is a young woman arguing with some monstrous, metallic, transformer looking, werewolf about the war between there kind. The woman keeps pointing out the atrocities committed against her people and the werewolf keeps countering with, "But it was WAR."

      I think about the war and the dream changes. I am in some post apocalyptic area. The buildings are rubble and the sky is black with smoke. I see the woman, who I now realize looks like Maggie from Walking Dead. Glenn is next to her, but his left hand is a cannon made from nano-tech. He is shooting fiery energy at the enemy. I look at who he is shooting at and see that we are on top of what looks like a cobblestone version of a huge dam or fortress wall. There is a horde of the shiny black metallic werewolf creatures battling their way towards us. I wake up.

      6:51AM - #277 - DILD - The Wine Bottle

      I am getting gas. Someone pulls up in a flatbed pickup with various sticks and stones for sale. My wife wants to buy some for crafts but I tell her no. I tell her just go outside and look for your own for free.

      I turn and now I am in a Wal-Mart. I see a bottle of wine on the shelf. The lettering is crystal clear but makes no sense. "ISOP?" Somehow this triggers lucidity. I am glad for it and I turn away trying to remember a goal. The dream that was so vivid and clear is now getting dark and blurry. I fight against it and begin rubbing my hands. I look down an isle but its just a blur of color now. I focus on my hands but its not use. I fall on my face into the void. I try to stay calm and focus on awareness. I tell myself that no matter what happens I will stay aware. I am falling and turning slighty. I wait.

      Then I am fooled by a false awakening. I try recalling the dream in the dream (or was I wake?) but fall back to sleep.

      Vampire Sisters

      Now I am refinishing the hardwood floors of my house. I am nearly done and some vampire woman walk in on my wet floors. I am annoyed but they are fighting. Another vampire woman comes in and tells them to stop. She says something like, "We are not fighting each other, but our greatest enemy." Then she looks alarmed pointing at one of the vampires sisters. "What clearance did you give her?!"

      I have a vision of a slice of supreme pizza on the floor. It some how represented the vampire sister in question. There are alien looking arthropod beings long tongues or labrum like a mosquito. They put their labrum into the pizza. I get the feeling like they are some how infecting her mind or possessing her. I wake up.

      8:25AM Tidal Wave

      I am at a rocky beach with my wife wading into the ocean. I keep reaching into the rocks and pulling out oysters. I easily pry them open and eat them raw. The third one is ridiculously huge and the texture is like the cheese on a pizza. The taste is like canned oysters. I try to get my wife to eat one but she is grossed out and scared of what might be in the water. (She would) I think about that and say I am only scared of sharks. My wife screams and I look. There is a huge tidal wave coming in at a slow motion. The effect makes it see even bigger. We run a fast as we can as the water comes rushing in behind us. Water is at our feet as we get into a random car. I am trying to start it as the water takes us and the car away. I wake up.

      Fragments

      Horrible acne

      I am tilling the garden

      Updated 02-10-2014 at 12:52 AM by 5967 (Shits and giggles)

      Tags: galantamine
      Categories
      dream fragment , lucid , non-lucid , false awakening , memorable
    10. Only At Night

      by , 01-16-2014 at 06:32 PM (Xanous' Dream Journal)
      #266 - Multiple - 5:52AM

      I debated if I wanted to add these series of dreams as one LD or not at all because I really didn't do anything in any of them. But still, the number of times I was lucid was impressive since I wasn't really trying. I think the thing the put me in the right mindset what the fact that I watched all the available episodes of Lucidity Web Saga in one sitting yesterday. Obviously, it was on my mind when I fell asleep. By the way, if you haven't watched it you should!
      Lucidity: The Web Saga



      ...Or maybe it was the DayQuil I took before bed?

      The first two LD's are a blur. I was tired and didn't record. Iím not sure what I did in the first one but I think there was some conflict with someone. The second, I woke immediately after I became aware. I thought I would totally remember the dream to DJ later but of course, it faded away.


      I was pretty pissed about of this and really wanted to try to induce another one but being ill with the flu has made dream recall difficult in general. Induction seemed even more so. I settled for mantra and hoped to DILD.

      I am looking out my childhood bedroom window in TX. It's dark outside and there is a Mexican family sitting in lawn chairs facing the street. They seem to be looking up. What the hell do they think they are doing? Oh Yeah maybe there's a parade or fireworks nearby. I dismiss it and move to an old desktop Windows computer. It looks like XP or 98 but something is messed up with the display. The desktop is far too large like it was somehow zoomed in. I am able to pan around but I can't seem to open up the display setting to fix the screen resolution. Right clicking seems useless as well.

      I realize that I feel cool air and notice it is coming from the air vent. OH! The A/C is on and my window is open. I move to close the window and feel the mix of cool A/C along with outside heat. That family is still there. I become annoyed this time but really don't want to deal with them; they aren't really hurting anything. Still, It made me mad, so I loudly slam the window shut. I can feel them looking at me but I don't look back as I quickly close up some white curtains and then a second set of red.

      I turn and see my bedroom door is open (In this house my bedroom was connected to the kitchen and on the other side the back door.) I notice the back door is cracked open just a hair and I think that I should close it. But... Wait a minute. There is bright daylight coming in the crack. Remembering that the other side of the house was dark just a moment ago, I become lucid, but immediately thrown into a FA

      I am fooled, but not fooled by this one. I am still self aware but I don't realize it's odd to still be in my childhood bedroom in Texas. In fact, I think this part is reality. Regardless, Iím not ready to give up so I go into DEILD mode. Vibrations hit and after a moment I get up. This part of the dream is fuzzy and hard to remember, but basically, I just ran around blind for a few seconds until I was thrown into an actual awakening.

      I go into DEILD mode again, this time in my actual bed. Vibrations start quickly but its faint. I'm never sure when it's "go time" or "wait time" so I just focus on the vibes until the seem really strong. While I am waiting, I am suddenly jolted fully awake by the motion of my wife turning over. DAMN!

      Again, I DEILD and I feel slight vibrations. I wait, but then do not get any more intense. I don't feel I am deep enough in, but I try moving my dream body the way I normally do in this state. Nothing. I try it on the more physical side and my leg jerks and the vibes go away. I try to stay focused but at some point I just fall back into non-lucid sleep.


      The next dream reminded me of how completely amazing NLD's can be. Sometimes it's ok to get caught up in the action when the dream is so detailed, plot driven, and completely vivid.

      As I am walking down a street in a run down and dirty area of town, I somehow I know the Zombie Apocalypse has happened. I have false memories of seeing lumbering zombies in the dark and know they are only out at night. The daytime hours are completely safe. Still, the world is in chaos and much of society has shut down due to the huge population loss and the after effects of the "shit hitting the fan". This time-line of the Zed invasion seems to be a generation or two ahead with much progress made toward rebuilding life as we knew it. But still, THEY rule the night.

      I start to enter a gas station and realize I had been eating some Greek yogurt out of a large tub plastic tub. There's still a creamy feel with some bland taste in my mouth. The store clerk is outside smoking and as I pass. I stop and say, "I'm bringing this in." I don't want her to think I am stealing it when I leave.
      "What brand is it?" She asks.
      For some reason I have a paper towel around my yogurt and have to peel it back to see. It vividly read's HAMPTON'S OHIO with a graphic logo.
      "Hapmton's" I say.
      She shrugs, "Oh well we don't carry that anyway."
      I nod and go on in.

      I spend some time at the soda fountain. I'm not sure if I want Coke or Dr. Pepper. Fountain soda is always hit and miss for me so I take a small sample of both. Neither one taste quite right. Fuck it. I'll just pay extra for the bottle. I remember that I swore off soda, but also remembered that I decided one a month would be the most I ever drink. (True story) I walk around looking for the refrigerated section but donít see it in the tiny store. Feeling like I surely must have missed something, I look again. Ah! There it is. I have a slight thought of hey that wasnít there a moment ago, but shrug it off. I take a Dr Pepper from the top shelf.

      The scene skips now and I am with my "crew" a ways down the street from the store. Apparently, they stumbled across a stash of explosives and ammo. There's absolutely no one around. We arenít sure if the owners are dead are just out but we decide it's too good to pass up so we work quickly loading trucks. Theres some strange missiles in this warehouse that we easily move some type of explosive parts from. They look like really large ammunition rounds. I think something seems odd but I let it go. Multiple explosions?

      Now we are outside and there is some really loud sound like an alarm. My view has switched to a movie scene. All I can see is everyone looking past the camera, then freaking out and leaving in a hurry. I say something like, "I wish they would just show us already." The trucks leave and pass between two other truck with burning logs on them. I worry that the explosives with go up but they make it through fine.

      Now I am back in the action. I realize they left me because of my inaction. I should have ran with them. I finally get to turn around and see what the fear was about. The sun is going down and and I realize that alarm was to give an early warning to everyone so they have time to get indoors.

      I panic and run to the nearest building. It turns out to be my old work place back before we moved to a new building. I see my old boss sitting in the break-room with a few other people. Out on the shop floor, I spy Vanessa working. I walk over to her and jokingly say, "Hey, it only took a Zombie Apocalypse to get me to stay here all night."
      She totally ignores what I said and replies with a sour expression, "You're signed up for overtime."
      Before I can reply Hobbie comes storming through yelling, "I may stay here all night, but if they expect me to work, they can kiss my ass!"
      I follow him back to the break-room and yell the same words back at Vanessa.

      In the break-room my old boss gives me an evil glare. This makes me wish I was home. I really just want to be with my wife and not stuck here. I quickly decide it's better facing the zombie horde outside. I step out and see it's not quite dark enough for zed to come out and several children are running as fast as they can to get back home. I think about where my house is in relation to my workplace. It's not that far. Maybe I can run for it. I look at the sky. There may not be time. I might have to fend off a few zombies, but I think I can handle it if I have to. What I could really use is a bicycle. There's an abandoned house next door so I quickly take a look around back. To my relief, there is a mountain bike laying in tall grass. I pull it, but notice the front wheel is locked up. I take a closer look once I get it free from tangled grass; the wheel is horribly bent. Oh my God. NO! I begin to feel real fear and panic and I think maybe I can make it work anyway. I get on and try to ride it but the wheel just wont turn. I wake up.

      Updated 01-16-2014 at 06:35 PM by 5967

      Categories
      lucid , false awakening , memorable
    11. Dumbily-Wumbily

      by , 08-25-2013 at 04:09 PM (Xanous' Dream Journal)
      This series of dreams were a little disappointing. I am embarrassed at how sloppy I've become. I made a number of mistakes and really didn't get anywhere with my goal. At least I got multiple lucids!

      I took a longer WBTB than usual (longer than 5 min) with this one and got on Playstation Home Doctor Who pack and explored the TARDIS a bit trying to take in all the visuals of the inside. I think it would have been helpful if I had actually summoned one up or just materialized myself straight inside versus making the blue box first. I was worried about insomnia when I went to bed as I was super wakeful. I had to use my technique for falling asleep and abandon any lucid induction. I was surprised to DILD but with Galantamine it's almost effortless the first few hours. I really need to concentrate on my techniques after my mini awakenings instead of just falling back to mantra. It works... sort of, but I think the experience would be much better with a little more focus. A lot of times I just want to get back to sleep as fast as possible but still try for lucid. Mantras seems to be my fall back method during these times.


      Coffee:


      #216 - 3:25AM - DILD

      I have an FA and find my self getting some coffee. The set up looks like work but its a checkout line at Wal-Mart. I try to grab a Styrofoam cup but they are dirty with holes in them. I move the to other side and see some clean new cups. I get coffee from the dispenser. Mary, the janitor is standing next to the coffee machine. I nod at her and walk away sipping my coffee. (No physical sensation or taste)

      My cousin starts texting me while I am walking and though I cant read the words I seem to think that I know what we are saying to each other.

      Suddenly, I am in my living room on the floor next to the couch. I still have my coffee in my hand but I am not really drinking it. I am in contemplation and I feel something is off. I am drinking more caffeine? This isn't a good idea if I am going to go back to bed and try to get lucid. SHIT! I should always RC after any awakening I do a nose plug but don't really put thought into it. I don't even know if I blew threw or not. Then, I hear someone going out the front door. It's my wife. She tells me that she is going outside to get something and I can hear the keys jingle in her hand. No. She should be asleep. That's not like her at this hour. I AM dreaming! I walk to the front door and remember to pause and take in the detail. I look at the door and notice it is very different than waking reality. There is a large window in the middle of it. It's wooden and the paint is weathered and peeling off. Then I forget this and rush outside because all I want to do is get in the TARDIS.

      Outside the air is cold. Always the air is cold in lucids. Why is this? I enjoy the feeling of it, but I begin to notice that I feel really odd like I have a head cold and there is cloth wrapped around my head, chin to top. It feels heavy and I try to ignore it. I wonder if something is happening to my body in bed. I suddenly feel myself lying on my back and there is nothing on my head now. No don't want to do that. I focus and continue to walking with no other distraction. There is a street lamp to the right and void to the left. I let control slip a bit and just allow myself to wander in a random direction believing I will go straight to the TARDIS. I realize that I am walking barefoot but this time I feel like I am wearing shorts with a hoodie instead of the usual underwear only. Suddenly, I feel a sharp and realistic pain in my left foot and assume I stepped on a peddle on the sidewalk. I let out a whispered, "Ouch!" And grab my foot for a moment. I am shocked at the vividness of the pain but quickly put it out of my mind. I come around to the driveway side of the house and stop. I think it should be appearing now and can faintly hear that unique sound of it's engines. I get several brief and dim images of the TARDIS spinning in flight and appearing in various positions in my driveway. Suddenly, I hear the explosion of a gunshot from somewhere behind me. My physical body jerks in reaction to the sound and the dream breaks apart waking me up.


      Mirror:

      #217 - DILD - 4:29AM


      I hear my son crying and my wife gets up. The light is on but I have a blanket over my face and lying on my left side. I try not to move because I think I am trying to WILD and I am still in the same position that I laid down. Something feels odd. I can feel the air of the ceiling fan on my face and my breath is not obstructed in the least bit. Then, I hear an electronic robotic buzzing sound from behind me and the blankets vibrate like a strong wind is blowing. I immediately know that I am dreaming and do not feel frightened. The sound stops.

      I get up and am in the kitchen. I see my wife standing there in the doorway looking very sexy. I grab her and we passionately kiss like its the first time. After a moment, I remember my task and let her go. We can do this later. There is a coffee pot full of coffee on the edge of the sink. I laugh. What is it with coffee in my dreams? I spend several minutes aimlessly searching the house for the TARDIS but don't have any real focus.

      Then, I see the front door, but it's not a door at all. It's a large mirror. I run to it intending to dive head first. I pass a DC. Was it my daughter? She says something but I am focused on the mirror. I can see my reflection as I get closer. There are two of me but for some reason I think it's normal. Then, as I dive there is no reflection and I focus on reaching beyond. I get stuck at the waist for a second and wiggle through. I stand up and realize that I went from a very clean and tidy version of my house to a very dirty and messy version of my house. I look around still trying to find a TARDIS but suddenly, the dream collapses.

      I try to DEILD but find myself stuck in bed. I realize my head is floating and not touching the pillow. I roll into the floor and stop. I am in another bed with my head floating. I roll again, fall once more and stop on the floor. I suddenly wake up.


      Fridge:

      #218 - DEILD? - 4:47AM

      I either wake up or have a FA. I berate myself for letting awareness slip again. I mantra, "I am dreaming." but suddenly realize that I either I never really woke up or I went straight into a DEILD. I say, "I am still dreaming." (from the times maybe there was not so much a gap after all.)

      I am in the kitchen again. No... a different kitchen. I see a very large fridge and decide to turn it into a TARDIS . There only seems to be one light source in the middle of the room and the area the around fridge is cast in deep shadow. Feeling the fridge, I circle around it into the void phasing past cabinets and walls. I am blind now but my physical sensation is vivid. I imaging how the outside of the TARDIS should feel and it quickly takes shape. When I think I have it, I open my eyes. The sensation of my eyelids feels startlingly real. I pause a moment but realize I am hugging a huge blue box.

      I excitedly step back but it just looks like some wardrobe with solid wood doors painted TARDIS blue. I become annoyed and obsessed with getting it at least somewhat right. I spin the front around and try again. I just want to see "Police Call Box" on the front before I go in. When I spin it back around there is some cheap ass black label with white random letters on it. Something catches my eyes and I look left. There is the damned Police Call Box sign handing from the ceiling above the kitchen sink.

      I decide to let that go and turn my attention back to this half formed TARDIS. To my dismay, the blue box has turned to a type of plastic cardboard. I try to straighten it out and shape it back into a box but not matter what I do, the entire process is clumsy and the material becomes increasingly floppy and weak. I stop and realize the humor it in all. I take a moment and just laugh at it. Then I let out a mocking "WHOOOOHOOO!" I enjoy the sound of my dream voice and shout out again. Laughing I say something Doctor Who-ish, "Dumbily-Wumbily." I just laugh at myself and suddenly wake up.


      The next time I wake is around 7:50AM with no other recall. For some reason I thought I had 4 lucids. The feeling of forgetting something is maddening!

      Updated 09-07-2013 at 08:45 PM by 5967 (Forgot the gunshot and the peddle.)

      Categories
      lucid , false awakening , memorable
    12. My Headless Double

      by , 04-13-2013 at 03:15 PM (Xanous' Dream Journal)
      #162 - 4:42AM - WILD

      I WILD straight into a scene outside. I was thinking about the beach and I remember sand but not much else. I didn't really do any control that I know of and just went with the dream enjoying the hell out of every second of being lucid.


      At some point I have an FA. My wife keeps talking to me and I think she is the reason why I woke up. I tell her to shutup and leave me alone but she ignores that. After awhile I tell her, "I will slap you in the face if you don't leave me alone." She keeps talking then... WHAM! I vividly feel my right hand connect with her face.

      I freeze. She doesn't make any sound or seem to move. I feel totally awful that just hit my wife! I expect her to go ballistic on me but nothing happens. Then I realize this has to be a dream. I roll over a little to note the feel. Yep that feels like my dream body. Sluggish, numb, and a little slow.

      I move close to my wife to apologize. I still feel so horrible. We cuddle we automatically have sex.(menthol?) We do it for several minutes then I realize this is sort of a waste of time. The sensation isn't very realistic and I really don't want to risk waking up or *eehem* make a mess.



      This dream is super long and unfortunately I have a huge memory gap here as well.


      I am outside what looks like my back deck. I see the ground and it has no grass. I decide to teleport out of here but have no real plan. Just thinking about a sliders wormhole causes the view of my privacy fence to distort into ripples but there is no light or color. I raise a hand and see a sheet of rainbow static and then it breaks like glass. I summon the sliders device and point it at the fence. A beam shoots out and makes a proper wormhole. It doesn't last for but a second. Too bad. I give up and decide to teleport by falling backward. I relax and do the "Nestea Plunge"

      The scene goes black and I feel myself softly land in my bed. I feel disappointed. I wait and notice slight vibrations but wonder if that was just expectation. I RC again by slightly moving my legs. Yep that feels like my dream body. I throw my legs over the side and scoot out of bed. This time I feel slightly stuck but force through it. I stand up and feel a little wobbly at first but it straightens out. I begin to hear some strange whispering coming from behind me and it frightens me. I don't turn turn around to look. I just say out loud, "SHUTUP.". It stops. I notice how vivid my voice is and my awareness moves to my mouth. I marvel how I'm really in bed asleep.

      I walk into the living room and start to head outside. Again, I can think of no real plan just enjoying the dream. I begin to think about how super long the dream has been and think back to the beginning. I feel like I have it all in memory but I may have been lying to myself. During my retrospection I really didn't pay much attention to where I was going and was surprised when a DC stops me.

      He is standing there blocking my exit from the house. The really odd thing about him was that he was headless. I feel like I know him but I'm shocked and really creeped out now. I look closer and notice that he is an exact copy of me but with out a head. There is no gore where the head should be. There's not even a neck. It's just smooth skin from shoulder to shoulder with a slight dip where the neck should start. I command him, "Tell me what you represent!" No answer. I know that he doesn't have a head but this a dream and there is no reason why he can answer me. I poke him in the chest, "If you don't answer me I will throw you out of here."
      I wait and stare at him were his head should be. Looking at his neckless torso was just too much.

      Slowly, he answers in a small timid voice. "Second Contentment" (but it sounds like second contentiment)
      I'm still a little freaked so I come on really strong here. Annoyed, I yell, "SECOND CONTENTMENT? WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT MEAN!?!"
      After a moment, he even more timidly replies, "I don't know."
      I notice the door is wide open behind him and the porch light is on. I step forward to move outside and he moves with me. When we get on the porch I say, "Well guess what? I lied. Get the hell out of here." I push him off the porch and he flips into the flower bed and vanishes into the darkness.

      Thinking back I wish I had been a little more gentle with him and tried to get some better answers. For whatever reason this is a part of myself that needed some attention and I was a mean bastard. The whole thing was just so damned creepy that I couldn't take it. Maybe next time I can be more calm.

      I step out into the street. The scene was getting dark and I really had to try hard to maintain visuals. It feels windy and I feel like my eyes are drying out. Suddenly I realize that my physical eyes are open and must have been open for awhile. I can see the bedroom door. I don't panic but close my eyes and focus on seeing on the back of my eyelids. after some focus I DEILD back into the dream.

      I see the neighbor getting in a car but I ignore him. I start thinking how I can't remember any goals. The only thing I could think of is how I was thinking earlier in the day that it would interesting to fly into work during an OBE. I live only 7 blocks away in real life so why not? I start in that direction down the street.

      I see a long rectangular shape in the distance at the end of the street where it Ts off. (This still may have been my door) I focus on that spot and feel my body get light. I put my hands in front of me and my legs back. I get the strange focus effect and zoom straight there. Then I fly up over the houses and into the parking lot at work.

      For some reason there are several dumpsters in the way. I note four are blocking my path to the long walkway leading to the doors. Two are blue, one is red, and one is green. I weave through them crouched and sneaking. I stand up right when I realize there is no need to be sneaky. Now, I see the doors as I slowly fly to them. It is dark inside and only outside night lights are on. Let there be light. Let there be light. Let there be light. Soon I see some bright fluorescent lights flicker on. Alright thank you! I fly up to the doors and phase through the glass windows. I land upright inside.

      I take a look around and let out a loud "WOW!" The entire production area in this part of the plant has been cleared out. Instead of brick and steel there is sheet rock that has been taped and mudded but still bare with no texture or paint. Someone has built a stage on the left and down on the other side the break room has been opened up into a concession stand. I see Glen and Steve down there eating and walk to them. Glen is eating nachos and Steve has fried chicken. Before I speak to them I notice a guy on stage. I didn't notice then but can't help but think that he looks like anderj101. He is holding a black electric guitar and is standing next to a black baby grand piano. He seems messing with some equipment and waiting for people to show up. I ask him, "What am I supposed to do? I can't work like this." I don't remember his reply but it wasn't helpful. I jokingly ask, "Can I have sex on stage?" (menthol?)
      He laughs and says, "Hell yeah. I'll play Final Fantasy Pewter Shooter while you do it."
      I notice I am walking among tables now and I have a empty metal coffee can in my hand. I am tossing it up and catching it and beating on it like a drum. Just being fidgety like in real life. I get within inches from him and turn my left ear. Laughing, I ask, "Can you repeat that? Did you say Pewter Shooter or Peter Shooter?"
      He acts like he can't remember and mutters, "Hmm... Peter. Pewter. I don't know. I think it was pewter."
      "Are you sure because I want to remember this so I can look it up later." For some reason I don't want to mention that it's a dream. It feels like my great secret and a joke on the DCs.
      "I'll probably forget half this shit anyway."

      I freeze. Suddenly I remember how incredibly long this dream has been. I freak out that I will forget all of it. With this thought I open my eyes.


      I'm not entirely sure but I want to say this dream got on close to an hour. It's really impossible to tell though.

      I later had some non-lucids


      Work
      I was running a strange braid machine at work putting green nomex on a cable. It turned into a big confusing mess.

      The bar 5:58AM
      I was in some swanky bar walking out. There was a table with a big potted plant. I walk around it to be block by the only table with a yellow table cloth. There was an old man sitting with a young woman at a connecting table. I say, "Oops sorry" and side step them. He looks annoyed. Then I stop and suddenly want some beer. I turn back to the bar.

      There is a middle ages mixed race woman. I ask her for "2 Budweiser Lemon... No I mean Lime."
      She looks pissed off and hatefully says, "You want 2?"
      I nod
      With a smirk she tell me, "That's $18.30" She turns to get them and I start fishing in my wallet for a 20. I start thinking how much beer I could buy and take home for $20. I look down and notice she already has 2 bottles open and ready with a yellow label. Lemon?. I think about running away but instead I reluctantly hand her the $20.

      Much later I have a nice DEILD that I'll post separate.
    13. Monkeying Around

      by , 02-18-2013 at 01:31 PM (Xanous' Dream Journal)
      WBTB 4:00-4:20A

      1MG Melatonin @ 4:00
      50MG Caffeine, 200MB B6 @4:20

      I tried staying up longer but was really tired

      Slept from 4:20-5:08 recalled no dreams. I remember a fragment about everyone getting lay off at work. It was very realistic as far as the dream scene went. And highly possible IRL.

      Went back to sleep easily until 6:00

      Monkeying Around DILD interrupted - Caffeine

      I am on some play ground. I see some huge swings but walk past to monkey bars. I feel like this is be super easy (lucidity starting). I grip the bars and notice how numb I feel. I go back and forth on them and smile at how effortless it is. Some dude walks up and says something about walking it upside down. I don't know what he is talking about so I just start doing so chin-ups. They are super easy and effortless. I get it now. I see the young man watching me. I say to him, "This is only this easy because this is a dream."

      My son starts crying and wakes us up. My wife takes care of it because she is super awesome.

      I go back to sleep. I am not 100% sure but I think I hit a semi successful DEILD. I remember some OBE like sensations but I quickly lost it to FA. I think because I really wasn't trying.

      I do a nose plug. Did is pass or fail? I can't remember. I enter my dreams on my DJ. Post on DV. Then realize it is time to leave the house and I am late. I go brush me teeth. My wife crowds me and I get pissed at her and tell her, "I love you but I really need some space right now." She wonders off.

      I begin to look at myself in the mirror and notice how odd I look. I think that I look almost childish and like someone else. I get and odd feeling and wonder if I am dreaming. I focus on the mirror and now I look normal. I continue to repeat this several times. Then the tooth brush start feeling like it it fusing to my teeth and I forget all bout the mirror. I soon wake up just before the alarm.

      Updated 02-18-2013 at 01:33 PM by 5967

      Categories
      lucid , false awakening
    14. The Neighbor's House

      by , 02-15-2013 at 04:37 PM (Xanous' Dream Journal)
      Woke up at 4AM to WBTB Moved to recliner SSILD - No Aids

      #131 - The Neighbor's House -DEILD 5:01AM

      I wake up from a NLD. Have a really hard remembering the dream. A part of me thinks that I woke up here in a lucid FA. I am not sure. I move a little and get comfortable. The I decide to just forget the dream and DEILD. I get the vibrations almost immediately. It comes slow at first and then gains intensity. I have to admit and I am really excited at this point and I know this stage can make or break the LD. Instead of trying to visualize a place or scene, I go for a OBE style LD and hurriedly get out of the recliner and rush outside. I felt a little sluggish at first but the transition was pretty smooth.

      I go into the yard and for some reason look in the sky. I think its real life habit coming out. The sky is dimly lit and cloudy. The clouds look like gray and black marble. I find it really pretty and admire it for a while. The only problem is that I seem to look moving my head wildly back and forth and not able to hold still.

      I look at the ground to stabilize. I realize I didn't think of a goal before hand. (I was so unprepared for this LD) I had to really rack my brain to think of a TOTM. I remember flower and start searching the grass. I pluck a piece of grass and start to will it to be a flower. Then I remember that one is already done. I think really hard. I remember the clock but I am outside and don't feel like looking for a clock. Erase major element! I realize that I had wondered over towards the neighbor's yard so I started looking around for something to erase. I wasn't about to mess with my own stuff! I see his red car. Not enough. I see the houses across the street. Too much. I look back at the neighbors house. Ha! Ill erase his house! Then, I notice the dream world getting darker except for the house. The color seems way to bright and vivid like bad Technicolor. A car passes behind me and for a brief moment everything is lit up and normal. I don't want to fall to darkness so I ask the dream for light. I look and and yell "Lights! I need lights here please." I notice how strange my voice sounds hollow and echoes. Nothing happens so I try again. I clap at the sky and yell "LIGHTS!" The sensation on my hand is strange. Still nothing so I give up.I focus on my neighbors house once again. I put a hand up over my line of sight so that it looks like I have my hand above it. The idea was to just wipe the house away like and eraser on a chalkboard. At that moment the world goes completely dark. I think I am waking up. I forget all of my void/DEILD tricks and give up on the dream. After a few seconds I am fooled by a FA


      I wake up and notice thats its late morning and the light from the windows is bright. I notice how my dream clock is usually close to waking time. I guess I was off this time. (Doh! I missed that one!) I see a pile of cat vomit on the floor and it looks like cornbread stuffing. I see Stella, my cat, is next to it. I am so pissed that I slap her head. She is not phased by it. I backhand her in the head really hard but she just looks at me. I find this really odd but don't think it through (missed another one ) I see some familiar DC in the kitchen cleaning. I start bitching about the cats and go help clean. I wake up.

      Updated 02-15-2013 at 07:18 PM by 5967 (Typed on my phone.)

      Tags: deild, neighbors, obe
      Categories
      lucid , false awakening , task of the month
    15. FA's Brief Lucids and one Hellacious DEILD chain

      by , 01-27-2013 at 04:51 PM (Xanous' Dream Journal)
      pre-bed 9:00PM
      2000MG Fish oil - (some posts suggest better dreaming)
      100MG 5-HTP
      Bed 10:00PM
      WBTB alarm 2:30AM but I woke naturally at 2:19AM
      2ish MG Galantamine (poured half capsule out on a dish and just licked it off. )
      250MG Choline
      600MG GPC
      0.5MG Melatonin

      INSOMNIA!

      +1MG Melatonin at 3:00AM
      +2MG Melatonin at 3:30AM

      Dosed off a bit brief DILD that I can't now remember. It was a crap dream anyway.
      Short WILD with vivid Rainbow colored static and geometric shapes. I haven't tripped that hard since High School!

      Finally fell asleep
      I woke up about 5:30AM from a NON-lucid. Something about me and another man playing with our sons. We have Lord of the Rings action figures and bicycles. Aragorn against a goblin, orcs, some shrimp like creature, and Uruk-hai. The funny thing is the action figures were actually talking to each other.

      #125 FA's Brief Lucids and one Hellacious DEILD chain

      I don't know how long this entire dream segment was. I feel it was probably around 30min. Maybe longer. I am not sure. There are a few memory gaps in the beginning but this is the best I remember.

      Ex in-laws
      I am staying at my ex in-law's house. My ex wife does not exist. My current wife and my ex's brother brother is there. There was some long dialog. Something about his birthday party. I sit and listen to the convo. I go into deep thought like I usually do. I feel dislike for this guy (I never liked him IRL). I think about why I am even here. I remember that I dream this a lot.

      I remember some SP but my focus was low


      Downtown event
      I have a FA. My wife and I are leaving the ex in-law's house. First we were driving now we are walking. My wife tells me that her "brother" R is going to give an anniversary surprise during his birthday party. I feel disgusted and want no part of it but say nothing.

      It is really early in the morning and still dark. It looks like we are downtown Webb City. There are a few curbside bistros open and large groups of people are flocking to them. Most of them are nicely dressed in evening dresses and suits. As we are walking through I comment on this to my wife but decide there must be some event going on and these are famous places to eat. Anthony Bourdain comes to mind.

      I sit in a folding chair next to some woman in a black evening dress. I look around and notice my wife went into a building. I just *know* that she had to use the restroom. This woman looks familiar to me but I don't know her. I felt an indescribably strong connection to her. Like a close friend or a family member. She is older with shoulder length gray hair. She is well kept and beautiful for her age. I get the feeling that she is ultra rich and well known. In spite of that, she is super friendly and down to earth. We have a really long conversation. I forgot almost all of it. I can only remember telling her that I was really confused. I told her that I had a brief lucid dream and I just woke up. I told her I wasn't sure what was going on. I felt really sleepy still. I don't remember her reply if any.

      I start missing my wife and look behind me. I see a bunch of folding chairs set out full of people and a woman at a podium. My wife is taking a seat in the middle. The woman at the podium says something about a church service. I feel annoyed. I just woke up. I am tired and I am in no mood to sit through some church service in the middle of the street. I march over to my wife. I sit beside my wife, put a hard hand on her shoulder and ruffly whisper in her ear, "What is this bullshit!?" The woman turns to look at me. It is some blond woman. She looks shocked an a little scared. I feel extremely embarrassed. "OH! Um sorry. I thought you were..."

      I run off to find my wife. The shock of this triggers lucidity. I remember that I took G and was trying to get lucid.

      I am in bed with vibrations.


      Memory gap

      I have another brief FA to lucid here but I can't remember enough to record anything.


      Blanket Attack

      I am back in bed with vibrations. This time I feel like a retard. I very quickly remember the dreams and how I was so close. Now I am more focused and determined.

      I transition out of bed but I am unstable. The blanket suck to my head and I can't see any more. I try to fight it but my hands can't feel anything. I give up and turn to leave blind. I am thrown back into SP.

      DEILD

      The Colosseum - Another failed attempt at TOTY

      I transition out again. This time it is better. But I am blind. I feel my way out of the bedroom. I try opening my eyes for a bit but I realize that I keep opening my real eyes. I see the dream and see the waking world. Finally I stop and focus seeing through my eye lids. Now I can dimly see. This time instead of heading to the front door I wonder what the back door will be like. My vision improves once I reach the back door and have a hand on the door knob. I try to visualize a Colosseum. I think of the line I used last time. I open the door but I see a moon lit back yard. I close the door and try again. Still the same. Not wanting to push my luck and wake up I walk out side. At this point part of me wonders If I am sleep walking. As a RC I try to float. I see me feet lift off the upper level of the back deck. Yep it's a dream. Now, I uncontrollably float over the rest of the deck and do a nose dive into the ground. I flip and roll end over end. Undaunted, I get up and brush myself off. (Brush myself off? lol) It is still really dark so I look up and ask the dream, "I need some light here" Oops I forgot to be polite. "Please." Nothing happens. "Can I please have some light?" I look around sort of wildly. I see a full moon and some stars. I try to focus on the moon but it is like looking through unfocused binoculars. It is really unstable and blurry. I look to the east and see the sun is just beginning to light up the sky.

      Encouraged, I decide to fly to Rome. I "feel" like Rome is to the east. My flying stinks but I remember a trick I learned from Robert W.'s book. I see the closest tall tree and focus on the tip. I go into warp speed. I see the small focused point of the tree but my peripheral vision is a blurry mess. I sort of lose vision for a sec but feel the tree branches smack into me. I blindly grasp and feel something small thorny branches. There is a dull pain but I don't dare let go. I see another tree in the distance. I repeat the exact same thing.

      Will.i.am is now 18!-tree.jpgWill.i.am is now 18!-mountain-warp.jpg

      I look farther out. I see a tree covered mountain range. The sun is rising behind it. The mountains look really far away. They are small and on the horizon. I pick a spot with trees and focus. I fly/teleport. Again, I grasp branches and hold on. I lose vision briefly again. I think that this has to be far enough.I let go and drop to the ground. I land hard.

      I pick myself up off the ground and notice the sky is dark again. I try to imagine the Colosseum again. A huge spot light comes on be. I begin to hear a roaring crowd chanting something. I think, This is it! I pretend I have a sword sheathed on my left side. With my right arm I make a drawing motion. I can hear it come out but I feel nothing. All I can see is my shadow on the ground in front of me. I am a bulky muscular man with a Gladius in my right hand. I am in a fighting stance and ready for battle. At that moment the dream collapses.


      Haunted?

      DEILD back into bed. This time I give the SP a little more time. I focus on the feeling and relax. I just wait and watch like I do when I have HI.

      I begin to see a bright blue blob of color. I focus on it. It looks like some sort of animation on a computer screne. I sit up and reach for it. It becomes a tablet in my left hand. I continue to watch the strange blob. I ask the the dream, "What is this?"
      I hear a reply in my mind, "EVIL..... THIS HOUSE IS HAUNTED."
      I become afraid. I shout. "YOU FAGGOT! SHUT-UP! NO IT'S NOT!" (faggot? really? Sorry folks, I never use that word IRL) Then I realize that I pretty much just called myself a faggot. I think about stupid it was. The dream collapses.


      The Creep In The Mirror

      I DEILD again and remain calm. I sit in SP again. I am beginning to realize that if I give SP some time and not rush things I will be able to see better. After some time I can see the room. I get out of bed. This time I try to focus on using the bathroom door to teleport to the Colosseum. It is the closest door. I remember the non-lucid awhile back that when I opened the door it led to a park outside. I try to visualize the outline of wall again. I open the door. Nope. Normal bathroom. I try again and the room is a black void. I feel encouraged and walk in. I imagine a Gladius in my hand and try my WILD tech in dream. I make a repetitive chopping action with the sword and wait for the Colosseum to form.

      Suddenly the lights come on. I am just in my bathroom. I can see the sun coming from the window. The light is bright and warm like noon in the summer. I decide to just play around now.

      I go to the sink and look in the mirror. I notice the medicine cabinet is all wrong. It has a sliding glass door rather than a hinged one. I look really creepy and distorted. My body is all jittery and wavy like I an underwater. I focus on my face. My eyes look bloodshot. My goatee is gone and I look like I am 16 again. I gasp and let out a laugh. When I do that there is this strange zooming focus effect in the mirror with the background behind me. I am taken aback. I focus again on my face. I am making crazy faces at myself. I am still wavy and jittery. My reflection give me a half smirk. It looks like someone is photo editing my mouth in real time with a smudge tool. I realize I am not smiling. Then I notice that I have a black, smoky aura around me. I gasp and again the strange zooming effect. It was almost like reality bent and flexed around me. I focus on my face once more and it looks sort of normal. I feel really creeped out and decide to move on.



      I think about going outside so I look out the window. I pull back the blinds but find that I can't see past the screen. Its just really bright light coming in. I decide to head to the front door.

      I walk through into my son's room. And become distracted. I see him asleep in the crib. I lean over him and say "BOOOO!" He makes a face and puts his hands to his mouth. He looks like he is about to cry. I feel really bad that I scared him. I try to comfort him and kiss is forehead. Then I wonder if I am really astral projecting and worry that I am waking him up. Then I get an idea.

      I rush back into my bed room to try and see myself. I go back through the bathroom. There is breif darkness. Then I an standing next to my bed in the dark. My wife wakes up and half-way sits up. I see my body lying in bed in my right side with my legs slightly bent. I notice that MY HEAD IS MISSING. I jump in the bed next to me. It feels like a plastic dummy. It has a shirt and shorts on. I reach into the neck of the shirt but it feels like smooth skin. I remember the headless boy dream the scene destabilizes.


      Concentration is Lost

      I begin to DEILD again. I feel the vibrations buzzing my body. This time I become distracted. I realize that have had a long dream. I feel like I am going to forget is all. I try to think back while keeping the SP going but this much thinking fully wakes me up.

      The time is exactly 7:00AM. I feel a little confused because the room is so dark still. I swear to myself that I am still dreaming but after several clock RCs and awareness checks I quickly realize I am not. It is just cloudy outside.

      Updated 03-30-2013 at 10:43 PM by 5967 (Details...)

      Categories
      lucid , false awakening , memorable , task of the year
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