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    ZenLD

    behind it all

    by , 11-28-2020 at 01:33 AM (121 Views)
    Where to begin and where to end? To start with recall or with my thoughts first? I don't know I'll just let my fingers do the talking and it'll all finish before I know it.

    5

    Recall

    Had brief moments of lucid today and yesterday. It wasn't interesting really. Just the same thing of myself gaining awareness before all dissipating.So I didn't really write it down yesterday. Nor the dream yesterday or the day before since it wasn't that interesting but the message it was trying to convey was rather clear though. So I should probably at leastmake a short summary and the meaning behind it today.

    4

    Dreams
    right or left

    yesterday & in between day before missed dreams-
    I was inside a school. A sort of a friendly tournament. I joined the team to the right first, they didn't like the wayI wanted to do things. And the results were lackluster. But the one to the left, they embraced who I was and we did magnificently. What happened also was that they l.et me do things my way while also complimenting it withtheir expertise.

    -perhaps the message is to do what you like, but also do it in a way that's effective. Also to surround yourself with those who are supportive.

    4

    Jack clothes
    I wasinside a house. It felt like a familiar old apartment. But it was a house, just structure was similar to an old apartment in BC. In the room to the right was Jack and we tried on clothes. His uncle arrived in the middle. Andthe last event was us playing Nintendo. Just a summary of the overall events.
    ...
    3

    today's

    Fishing pole and Elves

    I was inside a sort of an adventure, a vr adventure gamewas what it felt like. 4-5 location segments. I was on a solo adventure, in a fantasy setting land with trees and what not. The starting point was some sort of white building for newbies. I ventured into the greenery and eventuallyfound myself a wire that connected to another land. I forget what the process is called, where you glide across a rope or wire with something... I think it starts with R? But the rope/wire from where I was is connected toanother land, most of these lands were floating. I went from land 1 to land 2. Met some old friend, they were venturing in a group. The theme of this game/atomsphere had a bit of a pokemon like feel to it. It was defeatingmonsters and sorts maybe no collecting of monsters like pokemon but something about it gave me that vibe. Maybe those monster hunter games are more accurate and related to this experience.

    5

    I went onforawrd and ventured deeper. I slid across another one of those ropes into the third part of the lands. There were groups of people just standing, clamouring about. Since this was a new thing not much people knwe about it.And everyone was trying to figure out what the next event was. I notice a familiar group passing me. I'd gotten ehre before they did I suppose. And There was some building there. I forget now what it was.... EvenvtuallyI tarvelled south. Or it felt like south. To another land.

    4

    This one had a mall. It looked like a strip mall on the inside as I was checking out the first floor. The game had PVP aspect to it and I wanteda weapon that was discreet. I was looking through stores and the first one was selling jackets, maybe knives. I asked the shopkeeper who was a skinny man, if he knew where I could get some discreet weapons? He directed meto a shop at the back and I proceeded to enter it. Actually it was just a kiosk. But the man recommended me an item after I'd asked for what I wanted. He just simply said fishing pole. And handed me a long fishing pole.It was a discreet weapon according to him and it could extend or you could shorten it as you liked. I forget if I bought it or not.

    4

    I leave the shop and find a room with elevators. It looked likea lobby room of a nice hotel sort of, probably a bit bigger. I entered it and I was directed by someone there. I think it was a middle aged woman who was like a manager there. She led me to an elevator and I entered it. Ittook me to a floor way up there. I feel like it was the 45th floor or something. It was a small village by the forest. Or the very outskirts of the village. Monsters or something. The room gave me some sort of power so I coulddefeat it. And after that, I went back down. The manager below told me that each person only gets 1. It was almost like a power-up or wish granting service where each person would only get to use once.

    5

    ButI wanted more of it. In my backpack I had an item. I knew what I wanted to do and I used it. It was like a scroll or something. But before that I was talking to someone hanging nearby. It was a young man, he also worked therebut he wasn't as strict as the manager there. But I forget what I spoke to him about, only that he was pretty chill. But I went on to become invisible and snuck past the manager. She had behind her a group of little children,looked like kindergarten. I looked and followed her a bit. It was a room beside the elevator and almost like a daycare for the kids. I looked through one of the picture books there, checked out what they were doing and left.Back toe the elevator.

    4

    This part's unclear. But I went up again. I remember that the room I ended up in was dark and red... it was in indoor room, unlike the one before where I'd ended up inan open environment outdoors. Narrow and stuff. Demons? I think I got what I wanted and went back down to the lobby.

    4

    I looked more closely at the people working there. I think I spoke with the man frombefore, or one of the higher ups working there. Maybe it was related to the room previous. These people were elves. Ah yes, the person I'm speaking to was an elder elf. He had white hair and a narrow beard and he was prettyskinny and short. He told me that they were running out of the source of their magic. Something like this area near this mall was once where they had a source of a spring, a source of magic that kept them the way they were.Like their life source? But with magic. They were running low on that and had to make a deal with the demons. The demons would give them, feed them magic, in exchange for the elves' labor and their permission to builda mall here. And that was likely what I saw the second time I went up the elevator.

    4

    But I knew. My dream sense told me what was up. That the demons had artificially created a lack. They were reducingthe magic source somehow so less was coming out. Then they had made a deal with the elves after. It wasn't real. There was no lack of magic. The demons had both secured the source of the magic, and enslaved the elves.Their plan had worked.

    5


    Lucidity Practice

    I'm getting better definitely. But the process is all so hard to explain. Actually that's just an opinion, not a fact. So just type it away and it'll make sense eventually as you sharpen your skillof pondering by the means of words.

    4

    Overall, I'm becoming better when I practice. In exception to the one where I'm trying to do it too often. This likely tells me that overdoing things doesn'treally help. While the activity that I didn't put as much practice, I had improved dramatically. I think it had more to do with attitude. As long as you can put your all in it and do your best, that's how the bestimprovement are made. Were I to do something, simply as a chore there would be no significant improvement. Do it, and do it well. If you don't feel up to it, don't to it or just pep yourself up somehow. Eat something,meditate, or whatever. If you still don't feel up to it, that just means you need a break from it. But if you do really feel up to it, do it as much as you like.

    5

    I've noticed. That it'seasier to... find the - use the beginning and the end. What I mean by that is to anchor awareness in the beginning of an event and it's completion. That is easier, and more reliable than to try to maintain the awarenessat all times. The beginning and end, use it as a reminder to get lucid once again. Then add to it once you reach a certain proficiency of that. Like the starting of an activity, like cooking. You aim to first get aware inthe beginning and the end. And then you improve on that by compartmentalizing each small task of peeling, cutting, cooking.. etc and try to gain awareness on the beginning and the end of each of the mini tasks. It's notthat you are trying to gain awareness; but rather they are reminder and anchors incase you lost lucidity. So you may stay aware throughout the whole of the action or not. But these things can serve as a reminder.

    5

    Andthat got me to... think? In the case of activities that are filled with actions, or many processes you can gain increase awareness that way. But what of things you do that has not many things to do? Then it made me realize...that thoughts and feelings - postivie or negative can be a good friend in this regard.

    3

    It reminded me of something that Mr. Yongey Rinpoche had said. He spoke of the time when he was a child andhow meditating made his anxiety disappear and eventually he missed it. But in this case I suppose every thougght and emotion I had can serve as an anchor or reminder to become lucid once more if I'm lacking physical anchors.

    5

    Doesany of that make sense? I don't know. It makes sense to me but probably not for a lot of people. So I should use analogies or metaphors more often probably.

    5

    But what if my thoughts and emotionsdisappear from meditating? And if my sensations become number and then what do I focus upon? Is that the meaning of - the teaching - the very idea of dream(sleep) yoga? To find out what - how you would maintain awareness insleep, or even bardo of which they speak.

    How would I, in the nothingness be lucidity I seek?

    5

    Total DJ awakes score
    83/190
    43.7%
    JakeMcDake likes this.

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