How to avoid sexual distractions [TUT]

[ninja9578]

Someone asked for a tutorial on this, so here it is. I almost never get sidetracked by sex in lucid dream, there are temptations, but usually fleeting and I forget about them as soon as I shun them. First off: the reason that many dreams are extremely sexual is because any psychologist with an expertise in dreams will tell you that during REM sleep, males usually have an erection. An erect penis leads to sexual thoughts, there is not way to avoid this. Sexual tension is something that builds up. The longer you go without sex or masturbation, the more sexual your dreams will become. If you are planning on trying to induce a lucid dream on a particular night, have sex or masturbate. Masturbation during your WBTB will combat the sexual temptations that your mind throws at you. Now once you are in a dream you have to remember that this is an opportunity to do everything that you can never do in real life. Sex is real, dream sex is never as good as the real thing anyway. If you're a virgin you may be tempted to try sex in your dreams, however, since you have no experiences with sex, your mind has to try and figure things out from what it has. This requires some thinking power, if you think too hard, you will wake up. This is why often sex dreams cause you to wake up. Even if you ignore all of the temptations that you encounter in your dream, you subconscious always wants to have sex, it's part of your ego. It will constantly bombard you with opportunities, you have to muster up the strength to ignore these. My favourite method of avoiding sexual desires in dreams is do eliminate the dream characters all together. You can either fly somewhere more private or simply kill the characters that are around you. Think unsexy thoughts. This is the same technique you use during real sexual activities when you don't want to get too excited. It doesn't have to be sexually repulsive thoughts just non-sexual ones. Mentally do some calculus or do a mental puzzle. The best advice is to simply avoid characters of the opposite sex though.

[Mes Tarrant]

I like the masturbating before sleep idea very much. Also, you could just think about all the other things you would want to do as you're falling asleep and get excited about those. Like go meet your favorite celeb or talk to a dead relative! Surely these are more interesting.

[b12]

you subconscious always wants to have sex, it's part of your ego. Actually, it's part of your Id. So the solution is to have sex or masturbate. Simple enough. I agree with what you said about your mind overloading as well. But if opposite sex characters are part of your storyline or you just want something nice to look at, that causes a problem. I don't think it's as much a matter as avoidance as it is of willpower. But then again, just like BillyBob said, the idea that sex ends lucid dreams is only a mental block that we made ourselves; there's no reason sex should end a dream. Flying doesn't end a dream, and i guarantee it's harder to fly than it is to have sex.

[soadfreak2121]

Great method, I will try it! The masturbation that is.

[Hazel]

Wow, I didn't even know people had problems getting distracted like that.

[Blargh]

Think unsexy thoughts. Lol, reminds me of the simpsons. Stupid sexy flanders! Flying doesn't end a dream, and i guarantee it's harder to fly than it is to have sex. That's what I was thinking, I've heard a lot about sex ending dreams (more about people not doing it because they've heard it ends dreams) but doing something completely impossible in real life would require much more imagination. Then again, maybe believing this is a good thing if it will lead people away from dream sex when the temptation is there. Not that I'm against people trying it if they really want to. Oh and great tutorial

[AmazeO XD]

I can only imagine... *masturbating* *mom walks in* Me: MOM IM DOING A WBTB!

[Lord Toaster]

I like the masturbating before sleep idea very much. That comment does not help my attempts at unsexy thoughts!

[ninja9578]

lol, yeah I agree with the comment above It's not hard to have lucid sex, it's just distracting. You are focusing on one thing and forgetting about the rest of the dream. That's why you wake up. Lol, reminds me of the simpsons. Stupid sexy flanders! Feels like I'm wearing nothing at all!

[Mes Tarrant]

That comment does not help my attempts at unsexy thoughts! Sowwy.

[ninja9578]

Actually, it's part of your Id. Are you sure? I thought ego was the part of your psyche where lust and greed and all that came from? Then again it's been a while since I've taken a psych class. i guarantee it's harder to fly than it is to have sex. I don't know about that. In terms of actual brain power, I think dream sex is harder. Flying is all visual (sometimes I feel wind in my hair, but rarely,) sex is physical, visual, audio, and most are pretty strong signals. When I fly I don't really pay attention to stuff that I don't need to, so everything other than what I'm focusing on turns kind of cartoony and surreal. When having sex you want everything to look, feel, and sound right. There are benefits to my method of relieving sexual thoughts before your lucid dream: "Hun wake up." "What do you want?" "I wanna lucid dream, how about helping me out?"

[b12]

Are you sure? I thought ego was the part of your psyche where lust and greed and all that came from? Then again it's been a while since I've taken a psych class. Mhmm. The Id is the part of you that's subconscious, that drives your desires for sex and agression. The Superego is the one that's based on ideals and social rules. It's subconscious but is able to be brought into the conscious. It's the one that battles your id, saying "no, i don't want to be like that, i want to be a good person," etc. The Ego is the conscious part of you that brings balance to the Id and Superego so you don't go insane (cognitive dissonance), usually through defense mechanisms. Well, that was your short lesson on Freud. Hope you enjoyed it! There are benefits to my method of relieving sexual thoughts before your lucid dream: "Hun wake up." "What do you want?" "I wanna lucid dream, how about helping me out?" AHAHAHA! I'm gonna try that!

[Spamtek]

I just read phrases like "sidetracked by sex" and wonder why you think sexual situations aren't allowed to be the end-result of a lucid excursion. Maybe it can't be "as real" as the real thing, but that doesn't stop you from being able to experiment with it - as an experience, a medium, dare I say an art form - in ways that you can't in real life, try to experience "astral sex" as OBEtards describe it or just mix the situation with other situations and feelings and emotional connections that don't happen in real life. Trying to replicate sex with your girlfriend down to the atomic level probably is a waste as much as other forms of obsessive realism in lucids, but that doesn't mean the more inventive of us couldn't use it as a creative and spiritual as well as sexual outlet. Some of us are kinky enough that the kind of sex we want to have is logistically or right-out physically impossible to coordinate in real life, too. And a lot of people really seem to think that the hormonal and motivational surge that comes with 'sparing the rod' actually drastically encourages spontaneous lucids; I know Ben Drummin's Infinity program requires abstention from masturbation as well. So I don't know why sex is to be avoided so much just because it 'might be distracting'. You say it's a lot worse than flying because it engages more senses, but that sounds like a shortage of lucidity on your part while flying than evidence that other activities are safer or more fulfilling. Certainly I've heard of people who find lucid sex to be a shallow experience and I've heard of people who flew and felt every gust of wind and pitch of gravity and rustle of hair that could possibly be felt. Wouldn't the latter be more distracting in that case?

[Ailos]

I don't know about most people, but I tend to have more sexual dreams after I masturbate then if I don't at all. I'm guessing that's merely because I was concentrating on sexual thoughts right before I fall asleep, thus I dream about them. Perhaps it's a better idea to masturbate, then do something to distract you for a while, like reading or a puzzle. Thus, you both release your sexual tensions and get your mind off sexual thoughts. Just my two cents. Cheers!

[b12]

I just read phrases like "sidetracked by sex" and wonder why you think sexual situations aren't allowed to be the end-result of a lucid excursion. Maybe it can't be "as real" as the real thing, but that doesn't stop you from being able to experiment with it - as an experience, a medium, dare I say an art form - in ways that you can't in real life, try to experience "astral sex" as OBEtards describe it or just mix the situation with other situations and feelings and emotional connections that don't happen in real life. Trying to replicate sex with your girlfriend down to the atomic level probably is a waste as much as other forms of obsessive realism in lucids, but that doesn't mean the more inventive of us couldn't use it as a creative and spiritual as well as sexual outlet. Some of us are kinky enough that the kind of sex we want to have is logistically or right-out physically impossible to coordinate in real life, too. And a lot of people really seem to think that the hormonal and motivational surge that comes with 'sparing the rod' actually drastically encourages spontaneous lucids; I know Ben Drummin's Infinity program requires abstention from masturbation as well. So I don't know why sex is to be avoided so much just because it 'might be distracting'. You say it's a lot worse than flying because it engages more senses, but that sounds like a shortage of lucidity on your part while flying than evidence that other activities are safer or more fulfilling. Certainly I've heard of people who find lucid sex to be a shallow experience and I've heard of people who flew and felt every gust of wind and pitch of gravity and rustle of hair that could possibly be felt. Wouldn't the latter be more distracting in that case? It's not that; it's the fact that most people have it ingrained into their minds that sex in a lucid dream causes a lucid to be shorter or to end abruptly -- usually because of the immense tactile stimulation. But really, that's not true.

[Sandform]

Roll over in the middle of WBTB..."Honey i'm trying to have an LD we need to have sex...are you gonna wake up or am I alone here?"

[MartinB]

dream sex is never as good as the real thing anyway. I disagree entirely.

[george]

In my own experience, masturbating before sleep creates more sexual dreams than normal. Perhaps this is to do with pornography, though.

[NocturnalDreamer]

Great method, I will try it! The masturbation that is. haha nice one xD but wouldn't masturbation makes you want more?

[ninja9578]

Whoa, how did this get brought back up No, it relieve sexual thoughts, ever notice how we tend to fall asleep after sex?... How we tend to want to fall asleep after sex?

[i make it rain]

before i found Dream Views, i would oft turn to sex while lucid dreaming. (by oft i mean 9 times out of 10. ) now i am able to easily resist it because i have done it so many times. so this is what i have learned from my dream sex experience. first, masturbation before sleep led to less sexual dreams. and for me, dream sex got longer and longer every time i did it. after awhile, i was able to finish quite often. and in case your wondering, after i finished i was able to dive right back in with no refractory/recovery/reload/cigarette period. the big issue is that it has led to multiple "suenos mojados." (i know there is supposed to be a squiggly over the 'n' in suenos. other than that i think my spanish is okay.) does this fit along with the discussion of the thread? no. but i thought i should spread some knowlege while sex was being discussed. and now that i do cool stuff while lucid, i would encourage others to resist the urge to splurge.

[quattykitty]

lol as ive said before on another thread... this site should be called SEX 101 ;]

[psiiiijay]

first i must disagree with sex being better when its not in a dream.. seconed- one the reasons you always have sexual dreams is cos of the erection yes BUT its not the only reason- when you go to sleep on your belly your erection is in contrast with the bed, you feel pressure on your penis, thus- whanting to cum (this is y i had the fist comment).. if you dont wanna have sex in your dreams- go to sleep on your back, the prob is you may turn around while sleeping.. masturbating is less helpful sometimes cos in dreams you can be horny again, and after having sex or masturbating you may think of more sex.. you can ask your dream (just tell it) not to make this dream a sexual one..

[MartinB]

Drinking more water before sleep leads to more sexual dreams in my experience. Not entirely sure why though.

[psiiiijay]

Drinking more water before sleep leads to more sexual dreams in my experience. Not entirely sure why though. also very true.. it creates a pressure that you wanna unload..