"Am I dreaming?" has become a curse!

I have full understanding of anything you tell yourself in lucid dreams can happen and if you tell yourself a certain way of flying and say that it's the best and you'll be flying forever, then that method works the best. I also know lucid dreams are extremely real.

But I never had a genuine lucid dream. I always feel like my lucid dreams barely are semi-lucid dreams... I have control but it's somehow scripted by my memory... I can identify why stuff happens, the feeling comes through.

So basically my lucid dreams always end, and when I said "Am I dreaming?" I never really mean it and it's almost like 3rd-person and that it was just scripted that way and then the dream ends like scripted... I feel this feeling, and it's the feeling that it always never works and I'm exhausted. This is what I meant by the feeling comes through. I can feel it like it's a thought but it's not in the form of language but emotion.

Anyway, I tried spinning and it felt like a roller-coaster. Last night I had a dream that someone was being knocked out with medication, but I heard the dude also saying it to me and yep I got knocked out with medication lol. It felt like that roller-coaster again and I woke up elsewhere and it did not feel like the time I went under when I had my wisdom teeth removed so I was confused on how I was knocked out because I never lost consciousness. I never thought too much into it, it was a regular dream.

But anyway. I had this great sex dream and it was the second time where I say "Am I dreaming?" and it's a curse! It's extremely frustrating because I feel like it's a lucid dream but I'm beginning to think it's a regular dream only posing as a lucid dream. I'm not really questioning the dream being real, it's just one of the thoughts on my mind it would seem since I typed a blog entry earlier in the day and I'm guessing it became part of the dream.

Can someone please help me reverse this?! I don't want to look at my dreams as being impossible to become full lucid dreams! But that's what the message is coming through as... That this is impossible and exhausting me. But I want to continue my sex dreams and to have full lucid dreams! I don't want to be on roller-coasters when the spin is supposed to bring a new scene...

Do I understand you right that during the day you ask yourself "Am I dreaming?", but somehow the reaction to this question while dreaming isn't the one you wanted? If this is the case I would suggest the following:
a) Do another reality check in addition to the question "Am I dreaming?". The most popular ones are the nose-pinching one (pinch your nose and see if you can still breathe through it - if you can, you're dreaming) and the finger-counting one (if you have more or less than 5 fingers per hand, or you don't manage to count them at all, you're dreaming).
b) When you do a reality check, don't do it in a bored, "mindless", routine-like way, but try to be critical and REALLY question yourself if you are dreaming, and also try to increase your awareness/concentration as much as possible (much like you would when you go from normal dream to lucid dream).
I hope this helps!

No, as of right now I'm not putting lucid dreaming as high priority. But I'm experiencing dreams where I question if the dream is a dream or if it is real and I then have this feeling that bad luck is now going to happen...just like it always does...and then I can't hold on to the dream...and I realize that asking this question only exhausts me and I shouldn't care and then poof, the dream is gone.

I wake up understanding the feeling I had and it's this feeling that I feel exhausted and I shouldn't care, and it's directly linked to me moving beyond the usual dream but then it really is still a dream because I don't have any real control to do anything different than what I just said above. These dreams happen the same way all the time, with the feeling of being exhausted and how I shouldn't care about lucid dreaming.

Now I also had spinned before but it's a roller-coaster feeling and I wake up concluding it wasn't a genuine lucid dream because I didn't feel aware and I felt like I did everything automatically and can sense it as it was all scripted and part of the dream. Plus none of it feels real at all. I really cannot stand having dreams about having lucid dreams because it feels like a curse because I wake up realizing I had no control and I was destined in the script of the dream to watch myself in third-person fail at starting a lucid dream... :(

But I really would love to have a lucid dream and continue my sex dreams without feeling a curse coming that will prompt the dream to end instantly.

Look at the thread about doing nothing man.

there arent any limits to waht you can do man. stay still and look around. This will buy you time. then make sure the dream is clear. ignore whatever you dont like. its that simple.