Very strange, unsettling dream involving my father...

So, I've never met my father, he left when I was about two years old and I've not heard from him since. I saw a picture of him about 10 years ago. A family member of mine who works in Law Enforcement recently asked me if I'd like for him to find him for me, and out of curiosity, I asked him to. About two weeks later he brought me his last known address and some other information. I've done nothing with this, it's been sitting in a drawer in my desk, but have been debating reaching out to him.



Now, in my dream, I'm getting ready, getting dressed, putting on my makeup and brushing my hair and teeth, etc. - you know, normal getting ready stuff.

Next, I open the door and there's a man on the porch at the apartment I used to live in when I lived with my mother. Iwl, I know the man my mother says is my father is of African descent, but the man in my dream looked to be some sort of Pacific Islander, maybe Hawaiian or Tahitian, or possibly Native American. He had the same hair I have and generally I look a bit like the man in my dream. In the dream, I knew he was, in fact, my father and let him in. I got the feeling that this was the first time I was meeting him.

In my dream, he was either on very hard times financially or homeless. He had a lot of stuff with him and I put a bunch of his clothes in the wash and he went to go take a shower while I cooked something for him. When he came downstairs and I'd served him some food, I noticed he was acting very oddly. Almost as if he were a little high or tipsy. He had strange mannerisms, but I chalked it up to my not knowing him and let it go because I wanted to get to know this piece of my life which has been missing for so long. We talked a bit, but after a while, started arguing. He started pacing around the living room and being very strange - almost aggressive and I started to feel very uneasy and wanted him to leave. I returned his clothes and asked him to go. He said he wouldn't, so I told him to leave. I ended up having to physically push him outside, but as I was closing the door, he overpowered me and pushed his way back in. He then headed for my bedroom and I kept telling him he needed to leave. When he got to my bedroom, he started going through my jewelry box and took a few of my nicer pieces including a very precious set of earrings that were hand-made for me by a friend who's since passed away. As he was examining these, he said "I can't leave without what's mine." and put them in his pocket. He then proceeded to continue going through my things looking for anything of value. Once he was finished with my bedroom, he headed towards my mother's. I tried to grab for the items he was stealing, but he out maneuvered me and always seemed to brush me off any time I managed to get hold of him as if he were made of smoke or something. I finally did push him outside and get the door locked.

I stood there leaning against the front door with my eyes closed thinking "How many mistakes must I make?" Just as I began to calm down, there was a huge bang which shook the house and I looked out the peep hole, not willing to open the door in case he was trying to get back in. All the sudden, what had been a sunny, bright day, was in a storm (I love the rain and storms are some of my favourite weather, but this particular storm frightened me). The tree out front had crashed into the balcony and the road out front was flooded massively. The last thing I remember was seeing an SUV get washed off of the road, flip over on to its side and crash into the streetlight, and that's when I woke up.




I'm guessing it's a sign that no, I don't want to know my father, but I have to wonder what it means that the man I saw looks nothing like the picture I was shown and what any other bits and pieces might mean if there's anything anyone can contribute, that would be awesome! Thanks in advance!

It sounds to me like you have had some emotions come up since getting your father's address.

Like you have an internal struggle whether to reach out to him or not, because while you may want to know him, you fear that he might come into your life and basically take you for granted and hurt you. Stealing something that you cherish would be an unforgivable crime - sort of like leaving your child without a father. Unfortunately you're not able to push him out of your house/life because the idea of getting to know him is bothering you.

You see him as a good guy, someone that you would like to get to know - because we all want to know our real parents ---- but then you seem him as the bad guy, the one who left you and your mother alone, the one that hurt you. Inner turmoil, should you find your father and get to know him or should you leave it be?

Good luck with this!