Can't decipher a weird dream. Need help.
Hello.
I've had this dream about 2-3 weeks ago, and ever since I've been trying to give it some meaning, or to decipher the lesson behind it but I cannot. So I came here.. hope you can help.
Nothing special happened in my life that could've triggered this dream. It was a normal day.
It start with me in a formal attire, close-up on my face. To note that I am uncomfortable wearing a suit and I hate close-ups on y face. The view pans back revealing that I am in a group of people that appear to be my friends, mostly because we're all standing in a circle, talking, but I don't know them in real life. But something was on my mind. I felt detached, preoccupied. Then the surroundings were revealed. It was a combination of an opera hall, with red velvet carpet and drapes ( yes, they matched ), beautifully sculpted wood elements, a bar, a stage as if it was set for a techno party ( I dislike techno ) and an indoor amusement park with kind of a wonky tilted ferris wheel in which you laid on your back like in a coffin, face towards the ceiling.
I sit there, in that group and wait. I feel frustrated and keep looking at my watch. I'm waiting for my girlfriend. I cannot hear the music, the other guys, nothing. It's total silence. Then someone catches my eye. A woman. Tall, long black hair, light blue eyes ( Olivia Wilde like ), dressed in a bright red dress, like molded to fit her body only. Her hair was down to the middle of her back. She also had a tongue pierce. She looks at me. I look back. She smiles, bites her lip then continues on walking towards a seat. I feel ashamed. Like I cheated on my girlfriend with her. I go to the bar to order tequila. I down 5 shots. ( Tequila is my favourite drink ) I sit there. I talk to the bartender, but I can only hear the music. It's Bad to the Bone by ZZ Top. ( The favourite song of a woman I once loved ) It feels like I've known him forever, like he knows my story. I can't see him, only his left arm. It has a tribal tattoo. ( My cousin has a similar one. We are more like brothers than cousins ) The I go to the seat where that woman is. Still anxious and detached, but now I feel mad. I sit next to her and say:
"What are you doing here?"
"You wanted me here."
"Why would I want you here after all that happened?"
"I don't know why. I just know you do."
(Even weirder, I'm not a native english speaker. My first language is romanian, second is hungarian, 3rd is english, but everything I hear is in english )
I stand up, and walk away.
Next "scene" I'm on the ferris wheel. It shows me trying to relax in the coffin type "seat". I almost crash into object that appear out of nowhere, but avoid them. I see my girlfriend. I know it's her because I can feel it, somehow. But it's not my real life girlfriend. IRL she has long red hair, small lips, puffy, as I like to call it, body (as in she is not totally fit, a bit curved ) and she has green/brown eyes. (green on the exterior, brown on the interior). My dream girlfriend is fit, blonde hair down to her shoulders, red luscious lips and eyes of the deepest blue I have ever seen. Kind of looks like Madilyn Bailey. I feel betrayed. As if I now know that she has been here all along and didn't tell me so I can spend time with her.
I get off the ferris wheel and go out for a smoke. I'm smoking Marlboro. I usually smoke Lucky Strike, and Marlboro make me sick to my stomach. It's a dark alley, lighted only where I walk. It's like the light follows me. Out of nowhere, a guy shows up to hand me a light. He's wearing a brown trench coat and a brown hat, mafia style. His lighter was a golden Zippo lighter with a red flame. I smoke half of my cigarette, and out of the darkness, a bunch of people come out, surrounding me. I can distinguish a doctor, a plumber and a soldier. The doctor tells me I have cancer. I wake up.
Thank you for taking your time to read this.
Sweet dreams.