• Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views




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    1. #1
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      Homophobic mother marries a woman

      The Dream:
      I find myself running down a long sidewalk in a trailing white wedding dress and veil. I am late for my mother's wedding.

      When I arrive at the church, there's a change room that I'm ushered into and I decide to check my appearance before entering the main hall. I look at my reflection in a tall mirror. To my surprise, my long wedding dress has turned into a skimpy white nightdress that's see-through. I spent a few good moments admiring myself in the mirror and thinking of how good I look in lingerie. A nearby DC takes note of my vanity and says I'll have to change into something more appropriate before going inside the main hall.

      I run all the way back home to find more suitable clothing. Once I get to the residence, I have to climb up a whole set of stairs to get to my room on the third-floor. I end up having to pass entire groups of people, including a gym full of sweaty men, but somehow I don't seem to mind that I'm in my underwear. A part of me even likes that they're watching.

      When I reach my room, I look out the window and it's snowing.

      "There's no way I can make it back to the wedding now," I think. "I'll just have to call and say I was sick or something."

      When I get my phone, I notice that's there's 21 unread text messages from my mother. As I read through them, it's only then that I realize that my mother is getting married to a woman. She talks about how all these years she's felt like she's been hiding who she really was, but now she can accept her bisexuality.

      Later, I'm at my parent's house, my mother is there in a white sweater and I remember feeling quite proud of her. I go to hug her in a warm embrace and then pester her for details ("Where did you meet this woman?" "How did you know?" "What does dad think of all this?"). She tells me she's married a Spanish woman and they're having fun exploring who they truly are. My father appears and is more than okay with all this.

      Notes:
      IRL, my mother is practically a religious nutcase and is a bit of an oblivious homophobe. Usually, in dreams, she's a saboteur so it was rare to have a moment in this dream where we hugged and connected. I get the feeling she thinks she knows me very well, but she doesn't know me at all. And that's probably for the best, she'd probably have a coronary if she knew all my secrets.

      I'm a bit...confused about my own sexuality. I think of myself as "mostly straight" but haven't felt comfortable with labelling myself any further than that.

    2. #2
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      It looks like this dream could partly be a follow-up to your earlier dream where a group of babies arrived on the scene in carriages.

      That’s because symbolically, a marriage can represent the uniting of parts of the psyche into one “whole” which is “new” and from which new progeny can result, i.e. new feelings, ideas and projects etc.

      The image of you running madly to the church might be the dream’s way of saying that you have to “catch up” better with what’s going on inside you regarding a new understanding of some kind which can potentially emerge.

      That might help to explain why you’re dressed as a bride even though it's your mother’s wedding.

      The scene in the change room could be showing why you’re “late” in general, that is, you’re possibly being distracted too much by “worldly matters” in the sense of understandably admiring your sexiness and other positive attributes when certain important matters need to be acted on (e.g. the marriage).

      Unfortunately, whatever the situation is could apparently make you vulnerable to lapses in how you look to others (running to and from church in a wedding gown, being in your underwear where others can see you).

      When you arrive home to get into some suitable clothing, you have to climb up to the third floor, suggesting the “higher” levels of the house that are linked to the intellect and thinking.

      In climbing higher, you pass various groups of people including a group of sweaty men in a gym, perhaps suggesting the idea that you could possibly be bypassing certain aspects of your personality which have to be looked at and learned from etc. in order to ultimately “be appropriately ready for the marriage”.

      Maybe because you “bypass” them and end up in a high, intellectual place, things go wrong, e.g. it’s snowing and so you won’t be able to make it to the wedding, perhaps symbolically because emotions have been shut down too much.

      But then your emotions are stirred up in a big way because you find out your mother was getting married to a woman.

      In the next scene, you’re speaking with your mother and father about the marriage which took place in your absence.

      Unravelling the meaning of the image of a mother or father in a dream isn’t really a routine process as many would like to believe.

      But if we take your mother’s image to partly symbolize her influence on you and the resulting conscious and unconscious effects which linger in your psyche, then it’s possible to try out a few ideas about these effects based on how you described her and your relationship with her.

      For example, it looks like she unfortunately depends too much on a religious creed and dogma to protect her from doubts and anxieties which we all are subject to when we see what goes on in the world day to day.

      This state of affairs apparently causes her to distrust and to shut out warm instinctive impulses and the mixing together of the light and dark sides of life.

      In the dream, she has married a Spanish woman, suggesting that a union has taken place with her warm and emotionally expressive side, supported by what your mother says of the marriage in the dream.

      The dream earlier linked you to your mother’s marriage by having you shown as wearing a wedding dress.

      Now it seems to add to this idea by showing you as being proud of her action and in embracing her warmly, implying that this is what you SHOULD do in a symbolical way.

      Your father in the dream is shown as being comfortable with what’s happened, perhaps to encourage you even further to adopt what is symbolized by the marriage, i.e. a fuller acceptance of and union with your instinctive side which expresses itself through emotions, vague feelings, intuitions, fantasies and similar inborn natural traits.

      So perhaps there was an incident or situation before the dream which hinted at the possibility of a change in this direction but you “missed it”.

      Or alternatively, maybe there’s been a kind of growing sense over a number of months about a basic instinctive reality that you sometimes feel within but which you’re not adequately “getting” in some way.

      This may or may not have anything to do with your sexuality per se but whatever it is, the dream appears to be encouraging you to take things more seriously right now in order to uncover and “embrace” a basic part of your personality which should be “united” with in a kind of marriage in a reasonably timely way.

      Anyway, I hope these ideas can be helpful in some way.

      Please feel free to ask any questions or to make any comments about this particular way of looking at your dream.

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