Thread: Sex with a female ghost and male ghost and found rooms

Just to start off by saying that the background information provided for any dream helps significantly in providing a more accurate interpretation and you’ve done an excellent job in outlining your current circumstances fully and clearly.

A professional analyst would also ask you to provide all spontaneous memories, thoughts and feelings etc. that appear when focussing on each image and event in a dream.

Instead, you can try this yourself and doing so could very well change some aspects of the interpretation which follows after you sifted through your own associations. That’s because the ideas below can be based only on a general outline of meanings that are often associated with certain images.

For example, a house usually represents the dreamer’s overall personality in its conscious and less conscious aspects.

Dreams also get across their meaning by using analogies, so in this case, you and your husband have bought a new house which is possibly somehow related to the idea of the need or wish to enter a new phase of your life in general.

Although the age of 35 is still “young” to most of us, dreams often spontaneously appear around that time to show the dreamer that the second half of life is being entered into and it’s required to gradually change one’s attitudes etc. in order to make the best of the second half of life.

Even at 50, such dreams continue to appear in order to help in this task and the current dream may be one of those.

Buying a new house might also suggest that you want to “leave behind” a current overall situation but apparently from the dream’s point of view, this won’t be easy to do.

For instance, the previous owners have left a number of large items behind such as a hospital bed and handicap accessible bathtub.

You mentioned that you’ve unfortunately lost your sex drive and it’s possible that the bedroom location along with the nature of the items left behind is alluding in some way to this fact.

In addition, the typo of “processions” instead of “possessions” might conceivably point to the idea that certain attitudes and beliefs or needs etc. are generally “going along in orderly succession in a formal or ceremonial way” albeit mostly unconsciously, and these may be somehow getting in the way of moving ahead in a freer and potentially more productive way.

So bundling these ideas together might potentially point to this early part of the dream meaning that stress over the death of your mother, your father’s and mother-in-law’s declining health, some likely understandable concerns about your daughter going to university, along with knowing the demands that will appear as your younger daughter grows older could have built up to a degree which unfortunately affected your sex drive and continues to do so.

In this way of looking at your dream, things may still be going along well enough in general but perhaps the dream is showing that possibly, certain matters have to be attended to more fully.

For example, a ghost in dreams usually symbolizes that some part of the dreamer’s overall personality is not actively “alive” in a three-dimensional way in everyday life.

You’d have to look at what comes to mind when you gather associations about initiating oral sex with the woman who isn’t much older than yourself, but it could possibly be a direct reference to a need to “pleasure” the sexual side of yourself in a more active way.

Then you have sex with the male ghost and are in control, perhaps suggesting that you need to “take control” of the need to fulfill yourself sexually by looking into why your sex drive has disappeared.

Especially because you had a strong sex drive earlier in your life, there would usually be no reason for its disappearance now except for certain issues such as excessive stress as already mentioned.

Apparently you didn’t ask a doctor about this situation and it might be worthwhile to do so now in order to explore any treatable problems which may be interfering with your sex drive.

Of course, doing so in itself can be stressful and you may understandably be reluctant to make the investment of time and energy required (e.g. you didn’t want to pay anyone to remove the articles from the bedroom).

The final scene in the dream where you prepare breakfast for 9 people including yourself might possibly suggest another part of the underlying cause of the problem.

For example, you might naturally want to continue “being young” and to fulfill mostly the role of a “mother” by “nourishing” everyone else instead of maybe cultivating some of your own potentials which have probably tended to be left behind during the first half of life.

The idea would be that you could unconsciously be strongly resisting, which we all do, “getting old”, especially since you’ve been confronted with your mother’s death and other pressing signs of mortality all around you.

The problem is that if we don’t accept consciously as well as we can various very painful realities, one or more upsetting symptoms can appear instead.

In the dream, you’re not afraid, anxious or worried when you see the ghosts, perhaps suggesting that, while you’re happy on the surface at this time, certain emotions regarding aging and death etc. could possibly be sinking below the surface too much.

So for example, the possible symptom of unfortunately losing your sex drive maybe is screaming out unpleasantly “You’re old and past it!” because of some very comprehensible averseness you may have to facing the realities of aging and death which we all should deal effectively with in some way at the appropriate time.

In addition though, you remember feeling in the dream that you wanted to clear the house and remodel, that you loved the house and recognized its potential, all of this suggesting that you indeed have a lot more to experience and enjoy in the years ahead as you actively explore your own self-development more fully (possibly also shown in taking charge of being “inseminated” by the male ghost).

Anyway, I hope that these ideas can be helpful in some way and if you’d like to explore ways about how to make the best of the second half of life, analyst James Hollis has written various insightful books on this subject.

Please feel free to ask any questions or to make any comments about this particular way of looking at your dream.

Thanks so much. I've been thinking about this dream and mulling it over. As I said I've never had such a dream. I have lucid dreams and experience that quiet often. But thus dream really bothered me.