It looks like this upsetting dream could be trying symbolically to give you some clues about how to make sure that you don’t tend to fall into another bad relationship like the one before the current one.
But just to start off by saying that the language of dreams is based on metaphors and analogies just like poetry, and these range from the simple to the very complex.
And any given symbol always potentially has two poles, one that’s positive and the other which is negative. For example, a given animal can appear as being friendly or as being angry and dangerous in dreams.
To make things more complicated, one symbol in a dream can also have multiple layers.
There are, on the other hand, many dream motifs whose meaning can be tentatively relied on at first in a general way when working at an interpretation because experience shows that their basic gist doesn’t change very much.
For example, anything that is “behind” the dreamer usually denotes somehow the idea of the dreamer being unaware of something whether inner, outer or both.
This is based on the simple analogy that, for instance, we can’t see unaided what is behind us and are therefore “unaware” and “unconscious” of it. Because this is such a basic comparison, it doesn’t often change very much.
Your dream starts off in a hotel bedroom where you’re cuddling with your current boyfriend. Because a hotel is generally a place where anybody at all can stay, its image in a dream is different from, say, a house which is more “individual”. This might suggest that you could at times be caught up in maybe indiscriminately wanting too much “what everybody else has” as defined by what’s on television and in the movies etc. If so, this could potentially lead you into relationships etc. that aren’t suited enough to you personally.
You then go into the restroom, return to find your boyfriend unexpectedly gone and this lets off a storm of emotion. A restroom of course is where “peeing” occurs, the medical term for which is the “expression of urine”. On analogy, this is linked by analogy to any needed “expression of feelings” in order to remain well. But it looks like things can go well in relationships maybe until a few small doubts and worries appear about whether you’re really accepted as a person, and this can become an uncontrollable flood of emotions which can tend to disrupt a relationship.
The image related to the confusion between your boyfriend and your male friend (who is like a brother to you) could possibly symbolize the danger of depending on men to give you a sense of worth and well-being. For example, the man who is like a brother to you “betrays” you in the dream by allowing you to be brutally raped. The “rapists” probably symbolize the unfortunately negative thoughts, opinions and insecurities about yourself which maybe can make you vulnerable to accepting men who can let you down in some way. The idea could be that basically, you might have to work at gradually building up feelings of self-worth and confidence from within yourself instead of just relying on the opinions of others which can be unreliable to say the least, depending on the persons involved. That way, you’d instead tend to have better control over the inner negative thoughts and opinions about yourself that apparently come into to your mind too often at this time.
In this way of looking at your dream, not having any shoes on in cold weather could symbolize that this inner “protection” related to feelings of self-confidence and worth tends to be missing too often, possibly making you vulnerable to being “led around” too much (e.g. the man says you should follow him to the “collective” bus station) by certain fixed opinions about how you should act and what you should do etc. instead of looking for what’s really best for you as an individual. If so, the dream seems to say that this tends to lead to nothing but heartache (e.g. you end up being brutally raped in the dream).
Maybe you should step back a little and reflect on whether any of these ideas about your dream seem to make any sense in your actual situation so that you could make sure you’re not being taken advantage of in some way by your new boyfriend. For example, if the money you’re giving him to pay off his poetry book could tend to put you under any kind of financial strain, this might point to you not having enough feelings of confidence about yourself so that you might tend to “buy” people’s liking of you in whatever way which of course could be very harmful to your own self-interest over time.
Anyway, without knowing much about you, this way of looking at your upsetting dream might not fit your personal circumstances very well, but I hope that these ideas can be helpful in some way.
Please feel free to comment on, or to ask any questions about, this particular way of looking at your dream.
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