Thread: Phel's DJ of Awesomeness

Internet's back, woot.

Another WoW dream. This time it was snowing in Stormwind and people had left presents lying around the city. It was a kind of game. People left presents in hiding, and other people gathered them up. This year not many people had left presents and I remember considering asking Mum to help me get some to leave.

I remember something about hotel rooms and chicken soup, too. And I needed a brain transplant (wtf?) and somebody donated a fried egg to my cause.

Yeah. I was confused too.

Woot, LD last night!

I woke up early and did a WBTB, telling myself I would have a lucid dream. And I did!

It was quite shakey and I didn't want to yell in case I shattered the dream. So I remember saying quietly, "Stabalise lucidity" and gradually working up to a yell. I saw a landscape and decided to brush it up. I got rid of the clouds and some of the buildings. I called for my dog so I could do the lucid task, but I don't think she came.

Beyond that, I don't remember, except making a colour wheel in a normal dream somewhere.

Lucid dream last night, woot!

---

I was in my dad's office, doing goodness knows what. My mother was outside on the balcony that led to the back yard, overlooking the pool, and suddenly she called my name. "Come and look at THIS!"

I came out, and what I saw made my jaw drop. Whiteness. The clouds hung above us, and tiny, icy flakes drifted down onto my palm, which I had outstretched in wonder. Sydney. Australia. June.

And it was snowing.

"Wow," I remember saying. I was full of emotion because I had always wanted to see snow - and here I was, finally seeing it at my own home. Flakes lay scattered on the frozen wood of the balcony, and seemed to pile up a couple of inches in the places closest to the wall, and a little more in the actual courtyard - which I saw Mum slowly making her way towards. I examined my palm. The snowflakes hadn't melted. They looked... exactly how I imagined them. Tiny pieces of white sky. I couldn't see the detailed structures, but I didn't mind - I didn't even consider them.

It was Mum who came to her senses first. I "oof"ed as I felt a snowball hit me just underneath the chest. I saw Mum, the courtyard wall reaching up to her waist, a mischevious grin on her face and right hand poised to throw. I immediately ducked and scraped some snow - SNOW! I still had trouble believing it - from the base of the wall, instantly returning fire and getting another snowball pelted at me for my trouble. I remember laughing and gathering as much snow as I could, rushing to the courtyard where we met my ex next-door neighbour. We didn't find it strange she was there, but had as much fun as we could having a snowball fight. Much to my dismay there were puddles forming and water running towards the drain in the courtyard - I didn't realise it, but the snow was beginning to melt.

Jump to indoors in the kitchen. I asked Mum if I really had to go to school today, or whether they were closed because of the snow.

"Luckily for you," she said (though not for other people). "A tree fell across the road so we can't get to school anyway."

I was really happy at this point, and glanced out the window to the garden. The snow was gone, but I didn't register this, instead seeing the garden looked different. Weird.

"Come and look at this!" Mum in the kitchen again. I rushed over and looked out the window to see several branches of a tree near it. I accepted this as perfectly normal even though in real life there isn't one there.

Inside the branches, about four bats lay, nestled together.

"Aww," I said, then I looked around the branches. More bats. Even more. That was weird.

Maybe I was dreaming.

I held out my hand, inspecting the back of it. My fingers looked slightly weird and bendy, but not enough. Then I tried another reality check I had never tried before. I pinched my nose. Inhaled.

No difficulty breathing.

The first thing I said was, "Dang! I'm dreaming!" I was disappointed there was no snow in real life. I considered asking mum if she was dreaming too.

I think I wandered off to a bedroom or something at that point, not sure, but then Mum woke me up for real. Dang.

I remember something about throwing things around, but nothing much after that.

I had a lucid dream again the other night. Something about making a dog fly.

Ugh.

I keep having nightmares/dreams about the waves or the water at the beach. And last night was no exception.

I don't remember much how it started, except I dreamed I had a best friend called Leslie. She meant the world to me. One day we went to the beach, and she drowned.

She had gone to my school. I was the only one there who knew she had died, and I was so upset - every five seconds I just broke down and cried. For some reason the tears felt cleansing, and I liked crying, but I didn't like that Leslie was dead. At school I struggled not to, but I was amazed no one had asked where she was.

"What do you mean, where is she?" one girl said, aghast. "She went to that performing arts school! Didn't you know?"

I had no idea the school staff had lied to them. At one point I finally blurted out, "She's dead!" but I don't remember how people reacted.

At the end of the dream, I was walking down the hallway looking into the classrooms. We were watching memories - Leslie sitting at a desk and throwing a paper plane. The classrooms were brightly lit. Leslie was talking to me, and I was listening, but I didn't remember what she had said. At one point I remember walking alone and telling someone I had loved her.

Then we saw the sea. We saw Leslie's clothes floating in the sea. We had a third person with us, but I'm not sure who. Leslie said something softly and pointed at the horizon.

A boat appeared. Inside were the beach's lifesavers.

I think Leslie finally said, "And that's how it ended." but I wasn't sure. But after that, I felt some sense of peace.

As the dream faded, four words suddenly came into my head. "The Bridge of Terabithia."

Then I realised that the Leslie in my dream wasn't real - she was the Leslie from the movie. I remember feeling so shocked, and disappointed she had never existed in real life.

But I was partially relieved I wouldn't have to bear the grief.

Last night I had another dream about the waves again, but this one wasn't scary. I felt a bit worried, but I was OK. Despite that, it was the most violent of all my waves dreams. I got hammered in the waves, twisting and turning, yet I could see this bubble of air floating away from me in the tube, and I held my breath as I waited for the wave to get weak enough so I could move myself. I think I held my breath IWL too, because I started feeling my lungs strain and when I got worried I couldn't breath the wave would peter out and I could swim back.

At the end I was "at the back". It turned out that the waves were in a room, and the water drained completely. I was standing on this pier as someone jumped onto the sand and inspected a wooden pillar by the wall, when, all of a sudden, the water came back in full force. The person could do nothing but hold onto the pillar as the water tried to wrench him/her away.

Also, when I fell asleep at school, I almost WILDed, I think. I was seeing images but each time I realised I was merely daydreaming them I'd jerk out of it. I remember dreaming that I was doing loop-the-loops in the air, until a year nine woke me up and told me the bell had gone.

If I were you, I'd move to the mountains. No chance of getting drowned by giant waves.

Knowing my subconcious, a tsunami'd probably happen. *Laughs*

---

Monday, November 5, 2007

Last night I dreamed I was in the city, when this giant green t-rex started to prowl around the city, completely ploughing through the buildings. I looked up and realised I was near a school, and that the buildings I was looking up at were shaking slightly, rubble and dust falling down from them. I ran into the school.

(jump)

Next I was in this large room at the school, looking like a female dwarf. There was about twenty other people with me, similarly sized. I was terrified of being crushed to death, more of the pain involved than actually dying, and every few minutes we’d suddenly hear the dinosaur coming from somewhere and we’d try and run out of the estimated path of it. At one point I went near a pillar, thinking it would be safe since it’s stable, but I was afraid of staying at the same spot. So I ran around with everyone else. When the dinosaur came through for some reason the walls and ceiling wouldn’t be damaged, but I’d see a large, green, scaley foot come out of nowhere and go through the floor, making a big hole which would mysteriously disappear after the dinosaur moved through.

Finally, the dinosaur roared, as always, before it came, and we couldn’t tell where it was coming from. I felt panic rise up inside me as I gathered in a huddled group with everyone in the corner of the room, hoping beyond hope we were in an alright spot.

But we weren’t. A large clawed foot descended on us, and for the first time the floor didn’t collapse as it squished us. There was no pain. In fact, I was… playing World of Warcraft?!

“You have died,” the message box suddenly appeared above my corpse. An angel appeared – a holy specced priest must’ve died. “Your spirit will be released in 6 minutes. Release?”

“Want to do that again?” Suddenly I was aware of myself in my room with headphones, on ventrilo.

“Nah,” I said into the microphone. “That was heaps fun, but scared the crap outta me, I’ll give it a miss.”

Laughing, I logged out of the game, and the dream ended.

Woo, trying to keep this thing up again.

---

Monday, 17th December

WoW: Xantenise

((ND))

I was on my level 7 mage, Xantenise, playing World of Warcraft. I was killing things in this field outside of Goldshire with my friends, and a recipe for a leatherworking helm dropped. It required lvl 100 LWing, and you could be lvl 10 to use it. I remember thinking it was unusual, because most helms/hats can't be worn until at least lvl 26.

The Fight

((ND. Very vivid.))

I was in the car on my way home with my parents and brother.

"We're going to go see a movie on Boxing Day," said Mum. "We're going to ring up A and see if she's got the night free."

"Does this mean I'm not coming?" I said.

"Yes," she said.

I remember feeling completely heartbroken in the dream. In real life, I would've just shrugged and felt indifferent, but in the dream I was so upset I banged on the window with my fist. I threw a miniature tantrum, occasionally flailing and banging things to show them how upset I was. It was like I couldn't hold the emotion in - I HAD to let it out, and violence was the way I did it.

When I got home, I was trying very hard not to cry. I went upstairs into the kitchen and made three lines in my forearm, and they began to drip blood. I did it lightly. I wasn't going to kill myself - yet. I heard Mum coming in and quickly put the knife down, before putting my sleeve over it. I slipped past her, blood still dripping down my hand and onto the floor.

Mum didn't notice.

Then I was in the bathroom, getting undressed. I looked at my image in the mirror and suddenly saw it flip upside down. I gave a weak smile. I knew it was my angels trying to comfort me. I slipped into the warm shower, now crying so hard. I wanted to die.

What if you go to hell? said an angel in my head.

Then I'll find a way to destroy my soul so nothing exists anymore, I answered. I wondered if I should call my psychologist, but then realised my mum would notice, and I didn't want her to. The dream ended there.

---

That last dream reminded me of the worst part in my depression, where the slightest thing would trigger me into wanting to die.

---

Dream Shards

Bits and pieces -

- My character's husband being very upset at my character for some reason.
- I wrote down "sick ferret" in my notebook, but I can't remember any dreams with sick ferrets.
- Same thing with "Giant bug".
- I remember playing sims 2 or something, and there were huge ass windows that were several kilometres high. There was a brown haired child in there. Don't remember what happened after that.