Logos' Dream Journals

dream:journal:intro

This past year I have been experiencing a series of sequential dreams; nearly ten variations/worlds - each containing a different set of personas that myself and an amalgam (distortions?) of roughly 12 close friends occupy. I seem to enter them most frequently after successfully allowing my body to fall asleep while my conscious mind remains alert...I then slowly fade into whatever is going on in that world at the moment, with long streaks of deep lucidity here and there.

Following is the most recent of the "missions" I have been working on/participating in over this last year.

mission one:

Myself and at least one other Presence are seated before a being of light, who gives us a long explanation of complex ratios and sybioses that must be performed in able to enact some change in the distribultion of life on a specific planet; I'll call it Desert. I find myself doing a wide range of 'jobs' whenever I'm on this world, but most often my task is to balance the multituninous life in an expanse of large, shallow oceanic flats.

My veiw always 'flies' plunging down through the atmosphere and I immerse myself in the ocean; feeling the electric vibrations from all of the creatures around me, some microscopic, some as big as the continents of our waking Earth. It is a murky, tan/dun sort of sludge, but I can see through it as if it were pure spring water. So all of these creatures are floating in a space before me, and I can see the symbiotic relationships that each has to another, and how each depends on another, in an endless algorithm.

At this point I usually become lucid.

It occurs to me that I've seen this somewhere before and, simultaneously, I realize that I would never have seen something so strange anywhere other than in my... I am dreaming. Each of these organisms is something I should remember as much about as possible. I could never remember all this, I have work to do now.

I shift in and out of lucidity, making some decisions by allowing my subconscious reflex to choose the right course of action (my waking, logical mind certainly wouldn't know what to do in a situation like this!), and others by actively taking part in a conscious decision to enact a specific change in the equilibrium between a set of species (sometimes, just after waking, I can remember whole chains of these bizarre creatures, one species living off of the excretions of another, who only survives by following another species that is a messy eater, and so on in groups of hundreds of species!) Whew. I feel like doing a reality check right now just trying to explain it! Basically, I am shutting off my lucidity, allowing my energy-body to rest until needed.

I have had semi-cohesive variations (as if they are all on a timeline?) on this dream maybe 7-8 times this year, and each time the connections between the animals makes more sense. This was also one of the worlds I passed through in the Unified Dream that brought me here in my first DV post.

EDIT:
(Two days ago, I had the following short Lucid experience, in a deeper part of the ocean than I'd been to before, so I don't think I can call the planet Desert anymore...)

While swimming with a blurred friend-distortion in the open ocean, looking for a particular creature, I became lucid and afraid (my biggest remaining fear is that of deep water). Something small and squirmy slips through my right hand, the tail of a fishy creature, and I GRAB it as tightly as I can. It does not pull away, but delivers a calming electric pulse to me. My swimming companion 'tells' me (it doesn't seem to be a spoken word, but more like a very concrete thought.... telepathy? inner dialogue?) "why don't you have a look at what you've caught, you will be suprised" So I stick my head underwater to look at whatever this little thing is. I AM SHOCKED beyond belief. Instead of the small thing that the tail felt like, it is the very tippy end of an enormous electric eel. He (it definitely feels masculine in nature) is silver-white and has a head like a cross between a chinese dragon and a deep sea fish, with a sharply jutting lower jaw, and two long tentacle-like whiskers that glow blue. In fact, he pretty much has a blue haze all around his head, and I notice tiny 'horns' or 'nubs' of crackling electricity on his 'temples'. His 'mane' starts like a zebras at his forehead, all fluffy like a mohawk shock white, and it fades into a metallic silver marlin/sailfish-type crest that tapers aaallll the way back to his tiny eely tail that I still have firmly gripped in my right hand. He must be at least 50 feet long, his head the size of a big van.

I have never seen any fish with a 'look' in his eye, but this guy did. He raised his 'eyebrow' at me and waggled it, as if to say, "Now what are you going to do?" I just held his tail, and received an incredibly calming energy from him, and I closed my eyes. When I opened them, a smaller version of the dragon-eel-fish was in an indoor tank, and we were swimming together and playing.

I then woke up.

~L

dream:journal:one

monday, march 15th
(fell asleep to the brainwave generator on 'lucid' setting)

started with the fish/aquatic world, looking around in a shallow river. saw blue shovel-nosed shark, dun-colored hammerhead, no fear at all. saw dolphin, hugged him, he had two extra eyes, black and shining, one at the base of his nose where a 'third eye' would be, on on top of his head near the blowhole. i meditated with the dolphin underwater. i hold its fins and press my forehead to the dolphins melon forehead, and it spoke many things to me which i cannot recall (not english?) and i close my eyes.

suddenly i am in bed, and there are old and new friends sitting around me. my ex-wife sits across from me, which tips my lucidity meter (am I dreaming?, i think so...) smoking marijuana and passing it. an incredible lass I met at Burning Man is seated to my right pushing long hair out of my eyes (another clue that i'm dreaming, i just shaved my head again). my best friend (who I've been distant from for 6 years) sits between them. both women are radiant, nearly twins physically (and both libras to my aries) and my friend is grinning his mirthful grin at me. to my left are two other friends, one of which is blurred out in a fashion (i think it is my friend Heather, who comes into play later) the other is a younger blond lad who I 'know' is the dolphin. for some reason, i begin chiding my ex for smoking all the weed to herself, when she has so much, and i am bordering on angry yelling. nick takes me aside and reprimands me, and then the dolphin boy does the same, saying that i need to stop shouting so much and pushing my truest friends away. i feel a deep remorse, and when i return, i see that there is a single tear running down my exes cheek. i can feel her sorrow through a beam of shockingly clear empathy. i reach up to my cheek and find that there are no tears. i tell everyone that i am sorry, that it is too late for apologies, that i am dreaming and that i have practice to do. i lay back on the bed and close my eyes.

i am immediately standing underneath a thousand silver power lines. they crisscross over my head in every direction, forming geometric patterns. i am now perfectly lucid, and do a little reality check just to be sure (my reality check is a hop in the air to see how gravity works, if i float back down, or even continue upward as if there is no gravity). I begin craning my neck back, looking for a gap in the power lines that i might be able to slip through, but it seems that they are too densely layered. Finally, I find a space that might work, and I LEAP from the ground into the air and immediately realize that i have miscalculated my trajectory and will hit the wires. (i wonder what happened to my old dream ability to change the arc of my 'jumps'?) i bounce off of them without a problem. "oh!" (i think to the dolphin, who is 'with' me the whole time) "i always thought that these would shock me, even in my dreams. Who'd have thought it!" I begin bouncing like a wrestler off of the ropes, from wires to wires laughing and bouncing. finally i head out into the sky, leaving the tangle behind me.

When I 'land', i am on a large westerly facing hillside, and there are many people seated watching the sunset (it looks a lot like people's park in San Fransisco). I sit down. Some seem genuinely shocked to see me fly in, and others are just laughing and pointing. The short blond 'dolphin boy' is seated next to me, speaking sadly. "Where were you?" he asked "oh just flying around." I said. He shook his head and ran his fingers through his hair. "Damn waste of time." He said, softly. I become annoyed, and stand up. "Don't you want to fly with me?" To which he replied, "You are within a dream within a dream within a dream, and you still just want to fly?" I receive a 'flash' of being in the water meditating with the dolphin, and I exclaim, "Oh yeah! Can we go further into it?" I ask. "Of course!" Is the answer. We hold hands, close our eyes, and press our foreheads together.

I am in bed again. And my mother is leaning over me, trimming my beard (i've grown a beard again? i just shaved! Oh that's right, I'm dreaming!) When she sees that I am 'awake' she is nearly in tears. She tells me that I've been sick, and I feel like it too. There are all sorts of meds next to me (strange, I've never been put on pills for anything... Oh that's right! I am having a hard time remaining lucid now, and as soon as I think this thought, everything in my vision 'bends' like a fever hallucination) I tell her that I am dreaming in a very groggy voice, and she says "I know, you've been dreaming for a long time, Nate." I feel foggy and confused, and she tells me to drink something while I am awake. I ask her, "How long have I been out?" She hesitates, and will not tell me. "Have I been in the hospital?" I ask. She says, "Yes, for the last three days." I tell her that I don't remember, and she tells me that she knows, that I wouldn't remember it. She asks if I feel well enough to get up, and I say, "No, I am going back to fly with the dolphin boy, he doesn't understand how much fun flying is." She screams, "wait!" But my eyes are closed and I am drifting off...


At this point I awoke in my bed, about 20 minutes ago, tangled in my sheets in a cold sweat. I was confused for a moment, and my first thought was "Oh, I'm awake... Wait... What if THIS is the dream, and I actually AM sick in bed? Cooool." So I am going to get up now and do some reality checks!!

~L