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frustrated
I'm so mad at myself...last night I was on a bus with my sister and we were going to a state fair or something. We had to cross a river and the bridge was closed so the bus drove off a cliff and started flying over the city and the fair. That was all in third person, then it cuts to first person and I'm in the bus flying and a stewardess comes around to serve us drinks and there was a little boy sitting behind me wearing dangly earrings. I mean come on! Why can't I ever realize that I'm dreaming!? How do you guys actually recognize your dream signs in your dreams!? One of mine is flying and another is my sister since she lives in another city, but it never occurred to me even once throughout the dream, its like I just accept everything for what it is. I feel like I have absolutely no control over what I'm thinking. I've never been in a dream and realized that I was dreaming and became lucid...anytime I've had an LD it would start off as an LD and I'm afraid I'll never be able to recognize my dream signs. I feel so distant from the "me" in my dreams...like I don't know that person and I can't control what they are thinking.
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Yeah, it sucks! All you can do is keep trying.
Part of last nights dream:
I had a large step ladder that I had put some servomotors on. It was equipped with a camera and a monitor on the top. I would sit on top of the monitor and drive the ladder using a couple of control screws.
The ladder moved by folding and unfolding. You know lean forward and pull in the back legs, lean backward and extend the front legs.
It had all kinds of device failure issues (dreamsign) was difficult to control (dreamsign) and was just generally wierd.
Yeah, not a lucid dream, but amazing for it's complexity and realness. I drove that stupid ladder for then entire dream. Sometime later in the morning, I realized I didn't need the monitor and that it would be easier if I placed it over top of a pickup truck like a camper.
Problem was, the brakes would not work (dreamsign).
To top all that off, I failed at WILD later on.
Frustrating night! I know where you are coming from!
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Maybe instead of looking out for dreamsigns try perofrming reality checks often so that you can have a sure fire way of determining if you are dreaming. What I do is look at my watch and then look away and then look back. This morning I did a RC with my watch and for the first time he helped me become lucid but I was lucid for about half a second before I woke up. I have had many dreams where I was looking for dreamsigns and they were crazy. Once my school UCI was a boat and I thought it was perfectly normal. Another time my friend was a skunk and I thought that was normal too.