Thread: DCs Say the Darndest Things

Once I was surronded by DCs while releasing a butterfly that I had taken care of while it was a callapitter. When the butterfly had landed on me it died and all the DCs glared at me like I killed the butterfly on purpose. D:

Once ago in lucid dream i were at entrance to the pool
There were two girls at the entrance gate guarding so nobody enters without paying or permission
I've decided to try some 'Dream Control' and i've told myself in thoughts that she will let me through with confidence
And she did so, after she did, the other girl asked her with those words 'Why did you let him in, you potato', that insult was kinda cute to be honest

DCs are truly the best

I'm with my wife, having one of the hottest kisses in years, when she invites me to get into the bathroom saying something like: "Why don't you get a bit closer to feel more of the therapy experience?". Before I do or say anything else, we're interrupted by our little one mumbling something about "having paper towels" pointing some dirty spots of chocolate here and there inside her room, to what I reprehend: "Don't talk with your mouth full!! Eat all your chocolate before you start cleaning all of your mess!!"...

Funny? I didn't think so, at least it was just chocolate...

I'm at a sad memorial, on the stage making a slow, tearful, sad speech and say:
"I realize that there are things you can change.....and things you can't change....
... and I realize that it's hard to track a plane via radar from a helicopter"

Dreamer is on a completely hilarious Skype monologue and in the middle ponders the question:

"And if I eat a box of crayons, what color are my farts going to be?"

I hear a group of friends is ribbing some girl about not having a boyfriend, someone says:

"You don't live in <my city>, you live in BORING-VILLE!"

I'm a passenger in a car with 3 other DCs. (lucid)

Me: We should go to the math store and find a portal gun.
(I then repeat myself later as no one said anything)
DC girl: Didn't you say calculation store?
Me: Calculation, Math. It doesn't matter!

This morning I recalled perhaps the longest dream conversation I can remember. Not all too funny, but still worth mentioning.

Someone (who I'll call Chuck) had just leapt onto a train leaving the platform, and everyone on board looked very shifty and intimidating, glaring at him like they didn't want him there.
Chuck said to one of the passengers, a hillbilly type: "You look as if you're gonna shoot me."
The hillbilly answered, in a contradicting manner: "I sure don't look like I'm gonna do that."
Chuck said defensively: "No, I'm just saying, you seem like Samoa Joe."
"Who's that?" asked the hillbilly.
"My daughter," answered Chuck, taking a seat.
The conversation continued and became more friendly, almost becoming a reminiscence of their children.
"Bet you did a big sport too," said the hillbilly.
"I did my basketball for a year," replied Chuck, "And when you come back, you find she's gone off and studied something like media."

A couple from my DJ from the last week or so.

My wife told me and two friends that she ate a 'Flies, Mushroom and Pig Sandwich'

I asked a man what he'd like to drink

Man - 'I'll have a Peter please'
Me - 'No problem' (while I wander off to get one...)

waking from dreams laughing
middle of june
hypnogoge vison: *painted or engraved such star. a small version, a big version. than a line: *>*>*>*>*>
me:[asking Pit^u, my alley]?
Pitu: right, it's future and past.
vision change into - it looks like a block of cod. the last sequence is: later>later>later>later>later<
didn't see the tugs at the edge nor the rest of the lines.
me: Pit^u is it you?
Pit^u: yes.
me: it's the objects from the future from my friend's dream? ("scientific objects sent from the future and accepted as regular (sorceric) objects")
Pit^u: yea. the stars represent sarcophagus
me: oh, like those in Elisabet Heich's "initiation"?
Pit^u: yea.
me: so this is what i needed to know?
Pit^u: yea.
me: you don't tell me anything.
Pit^u: not in waking. i tell you in dreams. but usually you don't want to to remember. and it's all right.

i'm searching my memory for dream display of him - i have 2: the ugly very rude face from the hypnogogic vision of [circle\ball=[sqware\cube]], and the transparent skeleton-like man from a dream from age 2-3.
me: how can you be so cute when your face is so disgusting?
Pit^u: it's not my face, it's an interface i showed you.

i woke laughing.

me: so your'e not like that?
Pit^u: i'm not, i have been. i'm talking to you from the past, remember?
me: so how come you're cute with me?
pitu: you rescued me - you will rescue me.
me: and you are also a dragon?
Pit^u: i am a sea cucumber. and the dream amisary.
me: amisary sucks! you never tell me anything!
me: and your'e not like that?
Pit^u: in waking. in dreaming i tell you all you ask.
me: so al dragons been sea cucumber?
Pit^u: just my family.

here we went into some family rumores.

we're taken to a trench in the desert in the moore.
guide: we use the trench in the desert, for we have to build lot of houses.
me: what?
( no sign of building or houses.)
guide: we use the trench in the desert, for we have to build lot of houses.
0
my family, including my late dad, and another, american family,mother and children, acomodating a house. i take care of somthing in the fridge - full of tempting foods in plastic boxes [ tropical fruit salad, smething creamy - i steal a piece of fruit, deliberately thinkink how not to get caught, then sober up, put the boxes on the upper shelve, in my messed manner, then turn then to look neat. our shelve is empty.
me (to the young man with me - now my husband?) "we have to"... meaning "by food" but some how the thought (not talk - telepathy) complete into "rent a flat for the time we'll stay here".
me: "bla...bla...bla..."
meanwhile we enter a bulding - a hole with books, cart blocks in iron board, tables. all is in Hebrew, including the sighns. though it's the US or other ENglish speaking country.
me: what is it, library ?
librarian: yes.
me: it's all in Hebrew!
librarian: it's the Hebrew library.

me:" OK, let's do it in a library scene, as caractrize all my detective books."
2 woman coming from inside the building - one is elderly eccentric black lady with rastas.
eccentric black lady: looking to rent a flat for few days? fantastuc! i knew!" [taking up in her arms my little daughter, who has a sparse collection of afrecan little braids sticking in arbitrary directions - fascinating. she cerresses rhe girl's face, while saying: exactly now i cleaned my eye with an ampula. (?) otherwise i wouldn't have dared touche her."
i'm aceptic about her declaration but do not protest for her lifting and cerresing.
eccentric black lady: how much"... i'm starteled - have no clue how much a flat sould cost, nor how much we have. "religious are you? how much kosher the flat should be?"
me:not at all."
eccentric black lady: zero?
while i wonder if this was clever of me toblurt it at the opening of the negotiation, my alarm clock rang, woke me.

You duck sucker!

I'm standing on a dock, looking out at the water: "I know I am in a dream. I KNOW it. But if I leap out there and this isn’t a dream, then I’ll land in the freezing ocean and hitting that frigid water might just be enough to wake me up."

And I didn't become lucid.

I woke up about half an hour ago from the dream this was in, but I don't remember the exact context (any of the context, really) in which it was spoken: "Stars are aware not only that they exist but that they're stars."

I was in a public restroom when a man walks in. He pulls down his pants and sits on the sink and takes a dump. He gets up with a look of satisfaction and says, "I call that a debauge."

My roommate dreamed that a cop wanted to check her ID so she pulls out her card, notices that her picture is of her at a party, and she thinks to herself, "It's funny that we put our party pictures on our IDs..."

I'm walking with a friend and she suddenly asks me, "So why DO lawyers love shrinks?!"

Lion:Where are you going?
Me:Where are you going?
Lion: I'm going to eat you!

I broke my leg and got a cast - then later an old woman turns up kicks against the cast and proclaims:
In my day and age, people would be ashamed to make such a fuss about a broken bone..

Me: *Suggests possible action to solve current problem*
Girl: I would rather have you ejaculate on my tits than do that!
Me: *Stares at her in confusion*

I tell one of my kid's teacher, that playing to throw batteries against a Lego castle was like the end of an era for me, to what she replies exited: "That's exactly what the Gipsy Kings sing in one of their songs: My son didn't want to hear me, that's why I burned him"

My friend: I'm most interested in [kissing] someone who never wears makeup and isn't otherwise interested in it.
Me [sarcastically]: Oooh, pick me!

I was in a chemistry lab not sure what I was supposed to be doing, and the chemistry professor runs to the door in a panic.

"There's a pipe in the telephone!" he says.

"Fuck the school. You can´t take school personally. “

“Humans don´t need bones. They only need spoons.”