LolaTheLoner's Yoga Headache

I've decided to begin this workbook after years of interest in dream yoga. As I mentioned in the intro thread, I began the lessons three days ago before I decided to officially keep up with the class. I will post my experiences from these three days after my own introduction thoughts here.

I've lived in my own little inner bubble for so long that focusing on the outside is quite a challenge. One of my prevalent concerns when beginning this course is that I will not be able to "let go" and daydream the way I often do while maintaining awareness of my surroundings. After all, daydreaming normally involves escaping from the current reality. The same with watching movies and reading books. It will be difficult, but after my experience today (which I'll write about in a following post), I believe both states can be maintained simultaneously.

Currently, I'm finding it to be quite the mental struggle to remain as aware as I need to be even just for the meditations. I'm hoping that, with practice, the state of awareness will feel much more natural and it won't be a strain to maintain. As it is, I feel on the edge of a headache from the focus it takes to... well, stay focused.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Sivason

In this section he describes six relms. They are Gods, Demi-Gods, humans, animals, hungry ghosts, and hell beings, I did not find this section to be of much practical use. Each of the relms is supposed to be related to one of the six major chakras. In my experience, there are alternative relms that can be reached through the dream state and I have seen some that may fall into these broad categorizations. However, I only found a single useful piece of information in this section. He claims that by focusing attention into one of the chakras while in the dream state one can somehow enter the relm attached to that chakra. This is news to me, and I am not certain it is true.

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I found this interesting, because it seems to be another way of stating something that I've held to be true for quite some time. I do not know about the supposed "relms" that are listed here, but I do believe in different planes on the Astral Realm where things of various different frequencies reside. In my belief, matching your own vibration to the frequency of these planes (while in the dream state) allows entrance to that particular plane. What is described here seems to be the same type of concept.

On the day I began these lessons, I attempted the first meditation in the quiet office of the IT department where I work. It was towards the end of the day, so everyone had settled down and I had some free time on my hands. I listened carefully to each minute noise: the sound of the clock ticking, my co-worker typing away nearby, the faint sounds of computers whirring around us. The clock and the computers are something I generally never hear unless I pay attention. I'm not even sure I ever knew that that particular clock actually emitted an audible ticking noise. It was storming outside, so every few minutes I could hear the slight rumble of thunder and the windows rattling with the onslaught of rain.

On the way home, I decided that driving time would be perfect to continue my meditation. There would be a lot more sounds to focus on. The sound of rain while driving is much less subtle than in an office building. I also had my music up fairly loud, attempting to listen to the lyrics and the various instrumental layers beneath, while also listening for the slight whirring of the car that was almost entirely drowned out by the music. Every few seconds, the squeak of the windshield wipers across the window would catch my attention (although the windshield wipers were the easiest to forget about).

Yesterday while at the river, I pretty much just practiced the first meditation again. Nothing much to write about from that experience without getting repetitive.

Today I decided to move on to Level Two. I went outside to sit on the large pontoon boat that's parked outside my mom's house. Inside the house is almost COMPLETELY silent aside from the sounds that I make and the air conditioner. I had no problem locating all the different sounds around me: a dove to my left that coo'd at irregular intervals, more stable birdsong in the trees behind me, the slight birring of insects, the wind, a lawnmower somewhere down the street. My problem was maintaining focus for more than five seconds. It was like I had ADD, my focus would be interrupted by thoughts of what I was going to write about, what I was going to dream about--- I was even bombarded by thoughts that I needed to focus more. I would dwell on the fact that I wasn't focusing so intently that it was actually stopping me from focusing. (I've noticed that I have this problem in certain classes, as well.) While I WAS able to focus, I could hold most of the sounds in my awareness without much problem. But it was for such short intervals that it almost didn't matter. I also noticed that when some of the sounds were on silent, such as the dove, I held a sort of mental place-marker in that general direction.

After a what seemed like 15 minutes or so, I gave up on the meditation and decided to read. As I did, I got an idea. If the thinking part of my brain was focused on reading, perhaps the peripheral part could hold the sounds. It made for some VERY slow reading, but now I could hold the sounds in my awareness for an even greater amount of time.

During this, I made an even more important discovery. The absolute quietest layer of sound was the insect noises. If I focused on hearing this above all, then the other, louder sounds would naturally catch my attention and remain within my awareness without really trying. All I had to focus on now was reading and hearing the insects. I can't say that I could get lost in the story quite as much as I normally like to be without all the focusing, but it's a really good start!

I haven't posted in a while because I'm trying to become more proficient with maintaining level 3 during daily life before moving on to the next lesson. I set out to practice this and forget all about it within moments of starting. I guess I am quite easily distracted. But I am determined to teach myself how to maintain focus, because it seems to be a skill like any other that I just have to keep working with to master.

Work on this stuff over the rest of your life, it is not a race. Never treat it like a duty. The lessons themselves help build focus before too long.