This would be a good start

to straightening up America

(1) 'Press 1 for English' is immediately banned. English is the official language; speak it or wait at the border until you can.

(2) We will immediately go into a two year isolationist posture to straighten out the country's attitude. NO imports, no exports.
We will use the 'Wal-Mart's policy, 'If we ain't got it, you don't need it.'

(3) When imports are allowed, there will be a 100% import tax on it.

(4) All retired military personnel will be required to man one of our many observation towers on the southern border. (six month tour) They will be under strict orders not to fire onSOUTHBOUND aliens.

(5) Social security will immediately return to its original state. If you didn't put nuttin in, you ain't gettin nuttin out. The president nor any other politician will not be able to touch it.


(6) Welfare - Checks will be handed out on Fridays at the end of the 40 hour school week and the successful completion of urinalysis and a passing grade.

(7) Professional Athletes --Steroids - The FIRST time you check positive you're banned for life.

(8) Crime - We will adopt the Turkish method, the first time you steal, you lose your right hand. There is no more life sentences. If convicted, you will be put to death by the same method you chose for your victim; gun, knife, strangulation, etc.

(9) One export will be allowed; Wheat, The world needs to eat. A bushel of wheat will be the exact price of a barrel of oil.

(10) All foreign aid using American taxpayer money will immediately cease, and the saved money will pay off the national debt and ultimately lower taxes. When disasters occur around the world, we'll ask the American people if they want to donate to a disaster fund, and each citizen can make the decision whether it's a worthy cause.

(11) The Pledge of Allegiancewill be said every day at school and every day in Congress.

(12) The National Anthem will be played at all appropriate ceremonies, sporting events, outings, etc.

If you have ideas, feel free to add on!

(1) I never heard anything say press 1 for English yet. :P

(2) Eh.

(3) Eh.

(4) Six Weeks.

(5) Ok.

(6) Urinalysis in the schools?

(7) I agree 100%.

(8) So we are just doing the method an eye for an eye?

(9) Why didn't this just go with number 2?

(10) :D

(11) Well, it is said every day in my school. I didn't know some schools didn't.

(12) Isn't it already?



Isolating ourselves... will either screw us, or be good.

As long as we are able to leave the country to go on vacation, then I am fine with the stuff.

Rule based ethics does not change the page one is on.

Why do the blind always insist they can see?

Define a human in such a manner as to show me how "American" is a class member.

You live and always have lived in a rule based culture. Has it stopped the injustice? You have a rule based psychology, has it helped your understanding?

Give me a break, I live in America, yet I am a real slave.

When is man going to tire of rules and seek judgment?

There is a contradiction at the foundation of a rule based culture. Will is the product of judgment, it is not the product of desire. Therefore, there will never be sufficient will to maintain rules in a rule based culture. Man must undergo a psychological change to a judgmental based psychology if the world is to improve.

I would pretty much support most of that If I were american, most of those things apply to europe also. Funny thing about number 1 is that in my school library once, two people were speaking urdu and the librarian went up to them and said "Speak english or get out" - WIN

I would be a bit more liberal with number 8 and only partially agree with 5. But overall nice plan.

English isn't the official language of the US, and I don't see any reason it needs to be.

100% import taxes is just ridiculous and would destroy our economy and destroy our relationship with other countries.

Saying we can't export anything is silly as well. Why would you want to destroy diversification in our economy?

The last two is just propaganda. Its a horrible idea.

4,5,6 and 10 are all really good idea's however.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by davej

to straightening up America

(1) 'Press 1 for English' is immediately banned. English is the official language; speak it or wait at the border until you can.

(2) We will immediately go into a two year isolationist posture to straighten out the country's attitude. NO imports, no exports.
We will use the 'Wal-Mart's policy, 'If we ain't got it, you don't need it.'

(3) When imports are allowed, there will be a 100% import tax on it.

(4) All retired military personnel will be required to man one of our many observation towers on the southern border. (six month tour) They will be under strict orders not to fire onSOUTHBOUND aliens.

(5) Social security will immediately return to its original state. If you didn't put nuttin in, you ain't gettin nuttin out. The president nor any other politician will not be able to touch it.


(6) Welfare - Checks will be handed out on Fridays at the end of the 40 hour school week and the successful completion of urinalysis and a passing grade.

(7) Professional Athletes --Steroids - The FIRST time you check positive you're banned for life.

(8) Crime - We will adopt the Turkish method, the first time you steal, you lose your right hand. There is no more life sentences. If convicted, you will be put to death by the same method you chose for your victim; gun, knife, strangulation, etc.

(9) One export will be allowed; Wheat, The world needs to eat. A bushel of wheat will be the exact price of a barrel of oil.

(10) All foreign aid using American taxpayer money will immediately cease, and the saved money will pay off the national debt and ultimately lower taxes. When disasters occur around the world, we'll ask the American people if they want to donate to a disaster fund, and each citizen can make the decision whether it's a worthy cause.

(11) The Pledge of Allegiancewill be said every day at school and every day in Congress.

(12) The National Anthem will be played at all appropriate ceremonies, sporting events, outings, etc.

If you have ideas, feel free to add on!

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Scary stuff

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Originally Posted by Spartiate

Scary stuff

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One could make a fortune on arm bands!

Pledge of Allegiance: A wise man once said that a house divided against itself cannot stand. The only thing that is then worth pleging allegence to is neither gods nor man, but truth itself.

dave: learn to speak Cherokee or get the fuck out.

Spanglish or die

Hi davej.

I would normally ask if you actually believe that crap or if you are just trolling but given your history, I know the answer. How's the lucid dreaming coming by the way. Do you believe that it's possible yet?

On topic, I would suggest that you convert to Islam and move to Saudi Arabia. (for the record, that's where they cut the hand off of thieves - Turkey is sort of being considered for membership in the EU - this would not be occurring if they cut off peoples hands) EDIT: I guess they do it in Iran as well. Sort of underscores my use of the phrase 'Judeo-christian-Islamic' religion.

And for the record 'foreign aid' is mostly for our benefit. For example when haiti was in the throws of a famine so severe that parents were feeding their children clay, our 'aid' consisted of giving them money to build roads so that our corporations could set up sweat shops in their city as opposed to providing the farmers with food while they worked on their crops. This had the result of forcing anyone that wanted to get money for food to skip their crop and work on roads instead which had the nice effect of leaving them with no food so that they had to go work in sweat shops to continue the cycle of dependency. You would be very hard pressed to get the 'capitalists' that run this country to quit giving foreign 'aid'. It really is quite a remarkable tool.

EDIT: Also, I'm not sure precisely how (1) reconciles with this stupid little thing called the FIRST AMENDMENT that you may or may not have heard about in church.

I'm not sure if I should ban dave or laugh. Is this a joke?

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Originally Posted by ninja9578

I'm not sure if I should ban dave or laugh. Is this a joke?

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Well, if you ban him, you become him. Best just to laugh. Shame sometimes works better than anger.

yes, I think I am going to laugh, even though this is most likely no joke. still best response

I propose we establish reservations for isolationist ideologues where they can live under biblical sharia law and speak Murican Inglush, and won't have to worry about brown people (or sane ones) bothering them ever again.

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Originally Posted by Taosaur

I propose we establish reservations for isolationist ideologues where they can live under biblical sharia law and speak Murican Inglush, and won't have to worry about brown people (or sane ones) bothering them ever again.

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I would second the motion, however, my translator just smoked.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by ninja9578

I'm not sure if I should ban dave or laugh. Is this a joke?

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Why on earth does his post warrant a ban? For being a bit conservative?

It's banworthy because he's trolling, which isn't allowed. He's not being conservative, no one is actually that stupid/ignorant other than backwoods Alabama hillbillies, but they don't own computers.

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Originally Posted by ninja9578

..., no one is actually that stupid/ignorant other than backwoods Alabama hillbillies, but they don't own computers.

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Well in that case, I would suggest that OP was made at a public library but I don't think that they use them either.

EDIT:

... after having hacked davej's account of course. I'm not in anyway implying that a fellow DV member is stupid or ignorant in a moderated portion of the forums. Backwoods alabama hillbillies that don't own computers or use the internet are phenomenal crackers.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by ninja9578

It's banworthy because he's trolling, which isn't allowed. He's not being conservative, no one is actually that stupid/ignorant other than backwoods Alabama hillbillies, but they don't own computers.

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Conservapedia

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Originally Posted by Xei

Conservapedia

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*cringes* Everytime you link to that site, you increase it's pagerank. This makes google more likely to serve it in the results of searches. Nevermind. DV uses rel='nofollow' as most modern forums do. I just sort of have a kneejerk reaction against that site. Also, there are search engines that don't respect nofollow

I'm likin' the current featured article; 'atheism is a clown who didn't know it'. Apparently they're all really happy about this clinching argument, complete with pictures of clowns labelled 'atheism'.

How about #13 stop spoiling.
Seems to be a big problem to me.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Xei

I'm likin' the current featured article; 'atheism is a clown who didn't know it'. Apparently they're all really happy about this clinching argument, complete with pictures of clowns labelled 'atheism'.

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Honestly, I find arguing over a reconstituted shit cookie more stimulating than reading that mess but I do understand the appeal.

They have a lot of clowns in that article. Awesome.

I have a suggestion. How about we shoot racist idiots like you.

And the united states does not have an official language, dumbass.

America in a nutshell:

http://news.bbcimg.co.uk/media/image..._shcool_ap.jpg

Derrrrrrp.

lulwut, can someone explain that image lol.

It was top of the beeb page today. Also there is some woman who attacked somebody at a fast foot place because they were doing breakfast and wouldn't give her chicken nuggets.

ARGH!!!! I could sense something was wrong with it but just couldn't put my finger on it, at first i thought they were meant to only paint it on one side or something but argh how could i miss that. I saw the chickne nuggets thing though lol

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I could sense something was wrong with it but just couldn't put my finger on it.

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Oh right, hah.

USA: North Korea Edition

Quote:

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Originally Posted by davej

(1) 'Press 1 for English' is immediately banned. English is the official language; speak it or wait at the border until you can.

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No.

Quote:

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(2) We will immediately go into a two year isolationist posture to straighten out the country's attitude. NO imports, no exports.
We will use the 'Wal-Mart's policy, 'If we ain't got it, you don't need it.'

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Terrible idea.

Quote:

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(3) When imports are allowed, there will be a 100% import tax on it.

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Trade: a rising tide floats all boats. Shut out the tide and all your ships are beached.

Quote:

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(4) All retired military personnel will be required to man one of our many observation towers on the southern border. (six month tour) They will be under strict orders not to fire onSOUTHBOUND aliens.

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That's right...keep families separated even longer to take care of a non-threat. Brilliant.

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(5) Social security will immediately return to its original state. If you didn't put nuttin in, you ain't gettin nuttin out. The president nor any other politician will not be able to touch it.

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Unless you can come up with a large and sudden supply of young or middle age workers (possibly from immigrants) to support the increasing number of old and retired persons, it isn't going back anywhere.

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(6) Welfare - Checks will be handed out on Fridays at the end of the 40 hour school week and the successful completion of urinalysis and a passing grade.

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There is a lot fucked up with this sentence, including the perpetual downward spiral of poverty.

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(7) Professional Athletes --Steroids - The FIRST time you check positive you're banned for life.

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How about a league of steroid users? I'd like to see that. Football teams consisting of neanderthal-like superjuiced humans. Players that can kick a field goal from the ten yard line on their own side.

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(8) Crime - We will adopt the Turkish method, the first time you steal, you lose your right hand. There is no more life sentences. If convicted, you will be put to death by the same method you chose for your victim; gun, knife, strangulation, etc.

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:facepalm:
You, sir, are a stark raving lunatic.

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(9) One export will be allowed; Wheat, The world needs to eat. A bushel of wheat will be the exact price of a barrel of oil.

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lolwut?

Quote:

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(10) All foreign aid using American taxpayer money will immediately cease, and the saved money will pay off the national debt and ultimately lower taxes. When disasters occur around the world, we'll ask the American people if they want to donate to a disaster fund, and each citizen can make the decision whether it's a worthy cause.

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Because the lives of other people are worth less than the recliners of Americans.

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(11) The Pledge of Allegiancewill be said every day at school and every day in Congress.

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And I'll not say it as an act of civil disobedience. I don't pledge allegiance, thank you very much.

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(12) The National Anthem will be played at all appropriate ceremonies, sporting events, outings, etc.

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I thought it already was...?

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If you have ideas, feel free to add on!

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Begin mandatory elecroshock therapy for anyone who thinks this list is a really good idea.

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Originally Posted by Mario92

Because the lives of other people are worth less than the recliners of Americans.

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No, because the government shouldn't throw about tax payers money willy nilly to both corrupt backwards states and even those developed ones. By all means encourage private charity but with foreign aid everyone is forced to give to a certain cause that they may not support. Besides, those nations never sent us heaps of money when we were underdeveloped.

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Originally Posted by Thatperson

No, because the government shouldn't throw about tax payers money willy nilly to both corrupt backwards states and even those developed ones. By all means encourage private charity but with foreign aid everyone is forced to give to a certain cause that they may not support. Besides, those nations never sent us heaps of money when we were underdeveloped.

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I just think it's kind of sick that people would rather cling to a few extra dollars than save the lives of innocent people.
That's because America was founded over 200 years ago, and all those nations were in the same poverty then as they are now. When the hell has America ever been underdeveloped? We've had it pretty damn good throughout history. I don't recall 75% of Americans living in mud huts at any point in time.

(1) 'Press 1 for English' is immediately banned. English is the official language; speak it or wait at the border until you can. The U.S. does not have a de jure official language. Nonetheless, people can speak whatever language they want. They just shouldn't expect benefits or special privileges.

(2) We will immediately go into a two year isolationist posture to straighten out the country's attitude. NO imports, no exports. We will use the 'Wal-Mart's policy, 'If we ain't got it, you don't need it.' This is just incredibly stupid.

(3) When imports are allowed, there will be a 100% import tax on it. This is just incredibly stupid.

(4) All retired military personnel will be required to man one of our many observation towers on the southern border. (six month tour) They will be under strict orders not to fire on SOUTHBOUND aliens. What kind of sick immoral being are you?

(5) Social security will immediately return to its original state. If you didn't put nuttin in, you ain't gettin nuttin out. The president nor any other politician will not be able to touch it. Should just abolish it altogether...

(6) Welfare - Checks will be handed out on Fridays at the end of the 40 hour school week and the successful completion of urinalysis and a passing grade. Should just abolish it altogether...

(7) Professional Athletes --Steroids - The FIRST time you check positive you're banned for life. I don't care much about this one, but it sounds idiotic.

(8) Crime - We will adopt the Turkish method, the first time you steal, you lose your right hand. There is no more life sentences. If convicted, you will be put to death by the same method you chose for your victim; gun, knife, strangulation, etc. Surely you must be joking.

(9) One export will be allowed; Wheat, The world needs to eat. A bushel of wheat will be the exact price of a barrel of oil. Jesus H. Christ on a pogo stick...

(10) All foreign aid using American taxpayer money will immediately cease, and the saved money will pay off the national debt and ultimately lower taxes. When disasters occur around the world, we'll ask the American people if they want to donate to a disaster fund, and each citizen can make the decision whether it's a worthy cause. I agree with this, actually.

(11) The Pledge of Allegiance will be said every day at school and every day in Congress. Absolutely not.

(12) The National Anthem will be played at all appropriate ceremonies, sporting events, outings, etc. Absolutely not.

If you have ideas, feel free to add on! Work on decreasing the size of government until its gone. kthnxbai.

I'm not sure if the OP was being sincere. These views strike me as satirical caricature.

The problem is some of the ideas are good. Saying we should pay off the debt isn't satire.

Try paying off debt when there's no trade to tax.

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Originally Posted by Alric

The problem is some of the ideas are good. Saying we should pay off the debt isn't satire.

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The problem with that is that "paying off the debt" wasn't quite what the idea actually was at all. The idea was simply to cut foreign aid, and then to put that money instead toward the national debt. Seriously? According to 2009 statistics, the total foreign aid given by the US (measured as Official Development Assistance, ODA) amounts to a paltry 0.2% of the Gross National Income (GNI; see bottom graph). Given that our current debt is calculated at $13.258 trillion and we spent around $28 billion in foreign aid in 2009 (see top graph), then even if our debt stops growing (which seems unlikely) and our level of annual savings remains constant, this ridiculous measure would take 473.5 years to pay off the debt. Wonderful. And all the while we'd have to live with the shame of being the country with by far the largest economy and most potential to do good, but which nevertheless is the only developed nation to donate little or nothing in foreign aid. $28 billion is lunch money to us, but it helps the countries who receive it immensely. Exactly what part of this idea is good?
http://static.globalissues.org/i/aid...t-oda-2009.png

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Originally Posted by Taosaur

I propose we establish reservations for isolationist ideologues where they can live under biblical sharia law and speak Murican Inglush, and won't have to worry about brown people (or sane ones) bothering them ever again.

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This should have killed the thread, IMO. Of course it is a little bit inconsiderate of Taosaur to leave Armstrong Williams out of his plan but nothing can be perfect.