Yah I know.
I read it as attachment. I got his mistake despite the typo. ;)
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Hi. I haven't read through other people's replies so sorry if I'm repeating. I have depression, sometimes managable, sometimes worse. I don't take any meds either so i'll just share what I have found.
If I feel bad, I let myself feel bad. I sleep a lot, eat junk food, don't get any work done and generally mope around feeling sorry for myself. I don't force myself out or try to hide it as I then feel worse.
Exercise. No doubt you've heard this one? Well you don't have to go to the gym or do anything which takes effort. I just stick my ipod on and walk around for hours, run if I can manage it. The exercise releases 'feel good' stuff in your brain. Yep, thats the technical term for it.
St John wort. It's cheap, legal and harmless. It's sold in most hippy type stores (Holland & Barrat in the UK) and is a great, natural anti depressent but no or very few side effects.
Talking to someone who listens. If you dont have anyone nearby who will listen, just log onto here and send me a message! Ranting and moaning to someone who will listen and not judge you is the best way to feel better.
Best of luck and hope you can manage ok.
I wanted to add, I always believed it was just me being a miserable sod. Knowing is half the battle. Accepting you have depression and telling yourself that it is ok, a lot of people feel like this will help you overcome the hurdles!
Of course if there is something CAUSING the depression, then that needs sorting out before anything else!
Eat bananas and exercise!
Listen to The Beatles, they're a better anti-depressant than any pill doctors have given me! Walk barefoot through the woods for an hour. Meditate. Eat a lot of fruit! If you're addicted to caffeine, quit. Stop watching TV, the news is rarely completely true and usually just makes you feel worse.
I know this feeling, and your struggle as a whole, even though I don't know what it actually is that happened to you.
When my pet died, I couldn't talk to anyone. I couldn't look at myself in the mirror, knowing that I might have killed him in an attempt to save him. What if I hadn't intervened? What if he could have taken on the problem himself and saw himself on the other side, stronger and more successful? What if I ended his life?
What if I ended his life?
What if it was me who inadvertantly killed my beloved pet?
When I finally got out of bed, I almost went for a straight razor to end the pain. I couldn't take the loss, as it was too much of a burden to live with. How could anyone live with the knowledge that they killed an innocent animal?
I thought "I should stop moping and do something productive. What happened is over. His corpse is in the garage, waiting for the ground to thaw before getting buried. He's making progress, but you're just moping around you sad slick."
So, when I closed the drawer, I thought "I need something physically exerting to null the pain. It's the same idea as the straight razor, but it's not as extreme, and it'll serve a better purpose."
I put on my running shoes.
I stepped out the door.
I ran for hours. I let out my inner demons. I let them control my legs. Bursts of energy came from the emotions that told me I could have done something. The frustration inside me was manifesting itself as usable energy.
As my body changed for the better, I looked at my progress.
I'm a fan of Charles Darwin's theory of evolution. It's that through many generations, there will be many adaptations. Those who fail to adapt weren't meant for this world, as they were weak. Only the strongest will survive.
During one of my runs, I thought this. "Am I good enough for this world? I have to be! I'm not going to end up like my unfortunate pet! I belong in this world for a purpose! Only the strongest will survive, and I am one of them!"
A push in the right direction, running saved my life.
Sometimes depression meds aren't all they're cracked up to be. They don't solve the full problem so much as take the edge off. I was outright suicidal for years, and finally had to be put on medicine just to keep myself going. I'm still severely depressed, even with the meds, and I've had them changed up multiple times over the years to see if anything would work better than the others. I find keeping busy helps a lot. When you're depressed, doing anything, let alone getting out of the bed, can be quite difficult. But, when I force myself to get shit done, it makes me feel a lot better about myself, and a lot more accomplished, even if it was just some random household chore. My work helps as well, somehow, even though I abhor it... :P