Need to Dream vent..

So my girlfriend urged me to find some type of forum for dreams. So here I am. A little about me.. I am an only child. My father was never around growing up and my Mother was always the one constant in my life. So 10/16 is a important date to me. It is my Mother's birthday. Last year on 10/21 only five days after her 58th birthday I sat with her in a hospital room. She was suffering from organ failure due to stage 4 ovarian cancer that had spread despite chemo therapy and removal surgeries. It was once again, 5 years to the day that she was diagnosed and the doctor had only given her 5 years to live. I was with her during her last few breaths and I wanted to scream and cry and I just didn't know how to deal with all of the emotions that came with it. She had a little Yorkie named Jake. I took him in with her being gone. I went to bed last night and Jake will sleep cuddled against me all night but last night he was restless. He was barking and growling and just every uneasy. I was woken up at 2:30AM by him and let him out of the bedroom and into the living room and went back to bed and fell asleep. When the dream hit me it was very lucid because I was sitting in a hospital room holding my moms hand. She was sitting upright in the bed and smiling at me. I knew I was dreaming because I knew deep down inside she had passed. The room was very bright and I just felt love and sadness. She had told me she wanted to visit and that this visit is only temporary. I was so happy I was crying and I was so sad that it was temporary that I was crying. I felt those mixed emotions once again that I did a year ago in the hospital. My girlfriend didn't wake me up but she woke up because I was crying in my sleep. Just letting it all out. In the dream we just set there, I was holding her hand as I did in the hospital room, crying while she smiled. She didn't look sick but then I woke up and my pillow was wet with tears.

I don't cry very easily. And so I thought possibly that this was my subconscious letting it all out or something. It was just so surreal. Just wanted to know if others have experienced something like this and I needed to get some of this off my chest.

Sorry for the wall of text.

I have read similar experiences. I have had dreams relating to my childhood that include me sobbing. It tends to be sad yet relieving. I think that having this dream is probably a big step for you in coping with your mothers death. I think these kinds of dreams can be very positive and transformational despite the sadness. If you would like to continue dealing with the difficult emotions in your sleep (which in my opinion is very powerful due to the activity of the subconscious) then set an intention before bed. I'm sorry for your loss and I hope you are able to find peace. :hug: